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DifferentLands,DifferentFriendshipGuoJiadongHonestyLoyaltyCommittedGoodunderstandingCloseSteadyStandontheirownfeetMutualnoninterferenceDon’timposeRelationshipeasilyEqualityRespectprivacyChineseWesternDifferentrangeOntheonehand,thedefinitionoffriendshipisdifferent.Chineseregardgoodfriendsasbrother,andtheyevensweartointhesameday.Therageofwestern’sfriendsiswider,Friendshipcanbesuperficial,temperate.Itcanalsobestrongandperpetual.DifferentrangeOntheotherhand,thetopicrangeisnotthesame.Nevertheless,friendsonlyconfinedinoneareasinwestern.Itwon’textendtootherareas.InChinafriendsrunthroughallaspects,theytalkeverythingunderthesun.DifferenttimeInWestern,ifthepeopledonotseeeachotherregularly,therelation-shipislikelytodie.StudiesshowthatoneoutoffiveAmericanfamiliesmoveseveryyear.Americanfriendshipsdevelopquickly,andtheymaychangejustasquickly.DifferenttimeForChineseatruefriendshipenduresthroughoutlifechanges.Chinesearefriendseveniftheyhaven’tspokenfor20years.OneverywellknownsayinginChinais‘Itissufficientinlifetohaveatruefriend’.DifferentresponsibilityMostAmericansexpecttheirfriendstobemoreindependentandsolvetheirownproblems.Onthecontrary,Chinesefriendshipneedsmoreobligations.AChinesemayusepersonalconnectionstohelpthefriendtogetsomethinghardtoobtain.AChineseoftenprovidesmoneytohisfriendtohelphimoutofdifficulties,howevertheserarelyhappenedamongthewesterners.DifferentresponsibilityWesternfriendshipismostlyamatterofprovidingemotionalsupportandspendingtimetogether.Chinesefriendstendtogiveeachothermuchmoreconcretehelpandassistances.AChinesefriendsismorelikelytogivespecificadvicetoafriend.However,anAmericanfriendwillbeverycautiousaboutgivingdirectadvice.Insteadhemayraisequestionstoencouragehisfriendtoconsidercarefullybeforemakingdecisions.AuldlangsyneShouldauldacquaintancebeforgot,Andneverbroughttomind?Shouldauldacquaintancebeforgot,Anddaysofauldlangsyne?
Forauldlangsyne,myfriends,Forauldlangsyne,We'lltakeacupo'kindnessyetForauldlangsyne.朋友朋友一生一起走那些日子不再有一句话一辈子一生情一杯酒朋友不曾孤单过一声朋友你会懂还有伤还有痛还要走还有我Reason:
ThedifferentculturebackgroundFirst,Chinahadbeena
agriculturalsocietyforthousandsofyears.Theneedoflaborforceinagricultureemphasizedtheimportanceofinter-personalrelationship.Friendswereanimportantformofinterpersonalrelationshipsinthehierarchicalfeudal
society.Second,Chinesealwaysvaluepragmatism(实用主义),justasthesayinggoes‘ifyouhavemanyfriends,youwillhavemanyroads’.Bycontrast,thewesternculturewasbaseoncommercialcommunity.Theyvaluedindividualismandadvocatedpersonalfreedom.Moreover,it’snotstrangeforAmericanto
movehousefrequently.SomeadviceforaWesternstudenttogetaChinese
friendship:
·Figureoutyourmostimportantvalues·Gotothesameplaceatthesametime·Sharemoreaboutyourself·Gotointerestgroups,notbars·
SomeadviceforaChinesestudenttogetaWestern
friendship:
It
is
impolite
to
ask
about
a
person’s
age,
marital
status,
or
income.
VisitplacesAmericansenjoyparties,churches,westernrestaurants,park,sportsclubs.Bewillingtotakethefirststep.Don’twaitthemtoapproachyou.Showaninterestintheculture.Don’texpecttoomuchatfirst.AddYourTitleTherearemanydifferencesaboutfriendshipbetweenChinaandwestern.Butwhatweshoulddoistorespectandunderstandeachother.After
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