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RescueinaBottle读后续写
RescueinaBottle①CurtisWhitsonhadrafteddowntheArroyoSeco,ariverincentralCalifornia,severaltimesbefore.②Thisyear,CurtisWhitsonknewthewater-fallwascoming.Hefiguredhewouldgetoutofhisraftintotheshallowwater,getdowntherocksalongropesoneithersideofthefalls,andcontinueonhisway,ashehadonaprevioustrip.③Butthisyearwasdifferent.Heavysnowandspringrainshadturnedtheusuallymanageablefallsintosomethingfierce.Andthisyear,insteadofhisfriends,Whitson’scompanionswerehisgirlfriend,KrystalRamirez,andhis13-year-oldson,Hunter.Asthethreeofthemapproachedthefallslateintheafternoonofthethirddayoftheircampingtrip,Whitsoncouldtellfromtheincreasingroarofwaterinthenarrowingcanyon(峡谷)thattheywereinserioustrouble.Therewasnowaythey’dbeabletogetdowntherocksasplanned.④“Thewaterwasjustroaringthroughtherewithtremendousforce,”recallsWhitson,45.
⑤Theyhadnosmartphoneservice,andtheyhadn’tseenasinglepersoninthepastthreedays.AndWhitsonknewthatthey’dbesharingthegroundtherewithrattlesnakesandmountainlions.
⑥Ashewasthinkingwhattodo,Whitsonhitonabitofluck---heheardvoicescomingfromtheothersideofthefalls.Heyelled,butthesoundoftherushingwaterdrownedhimout.
⑦“Wehavetogetthesepeopleamessage,”Whitsonthought.
⑧Hegrabbedastickandpulledouthispocketknifetocarve“Help”init.Thenhetiedaropetoitsothepeoplewouldknowitwasn’tjustanystick.Hetriedthrowingitoverthefalls,butitfloatedawayinthewrongdirection.⑨“We’vegottodosomething!”Whitsonyelledtohisson.“Havewegotanythingelse?”⑩Thenhespottedhiswaterbottle.Whitsongrabbeditandcarved“Help!”onit.Ramirezalsoremindedhimthathehadapenandpaperinhisbackpack.⑪Whitsonknewitwasaslimhope.Buthewrote“6-1519:00Wearestuckhere@thewaterfall.Gethelpplease”andpushedthenoteintothebottle.Thistime,histhrowoverthewaterfallwasperfect.⑫“Allright,that’sallwecando,”WhitsontoldHunter.读原文1:时间when,地点where,人物who,事件what读原文2:plotmountainsettingrisingactionclimaxfallingactionconclusion
Whitson‘soriginalplanforthisyear'sraftingnowaytogetdowntherockscompanionsinneedofcarenosmartphoneservicenotasinglepersoninsightPara3-5:Para1-2:Para6-12:yelled---butdrownedgrabbedastick-carved”help”-tiedarope-triedthrowing-butfloatedawayinthewrongdirectiongrabbedabottle-carved“help”-wrote&pushedanote-perfectthrow(willitwork?)Continuationpara.1Continuationpara.2fierceconditionthreeattemptswaitingforrescueasuccessfulrescue点题:It'sthemessageinthebottlethathelpedrescuethem.(failed)(failed)Thebottleworked.Paragraph1:
Ittook30minutestogetbackupstreamtothebeachwherethey'dhadlunch.
Paragraph2:
Thenextmorning,thehelicopterreturned.
读首句1:Whathappenedthenightbefore?夜幕降临Asthenightfell,Thenightfell.Thenightfalling,Tips:如何表达时间夜深了Asthenightworeon,半夜atmidnight,午夜过后aftermidnight形容时间快:inaflash一刹那intheblinkofaneye转眼间形容时间慢:afterwhatseemedlikehours,afterwhatseemedlikeaneternity,Timefeelingsbeforethehelicoptercame
whenthehelicoptercameafterthehelicopterleftwhatdidtheydo?madeafire;spelledoutSOSinrocks;
(waitedforrescue;fellasleep)waved;yelled;flashedheadlamp;fellasleephopeful...excited...disappointed...relievedThehelicoptercame.Theyweren'tfound.whydidthehelicopterleave?Theywerefoundbutitwashardforthehelicoptertoland.思考:1.夜晚野外怎么求救?
Paragraph2:
Thenextmorning,thehelicopterreturned.
读首句2:rescuers怎么救出他们?(动作描写)
点题:是messageinthebottle救了他们Timehelicopterrescuersthetriowhenthehelicopterreturned/whenthehelicopterspottedthemwhilechatting可能的情节:(wavedtheyellowsweater;smoke...)announced;
loweredarescuer;
liftedthetrioonebyone;...gotsaved点题:It'sthemessageinthebottlethathelpedrescuethem.Ittook30minutestogetbackupstreamtothebeachwherethey’dhadlunch.Thenightfalling,theyputupatentandwolfeddownasimplifieddinner.Suddenly,alow,buzzingsoundappearing,Whistonraisedhishead,glancedaroundandspottedahelicopterinthedistance.Bloodrushingtohisfaceandheartpalpitatingfiercely,heleapttohisfeetandyelledatthetopofhisvoice.However,thesoundofthehelicopterdrownedhimout.Thehelicopterhoveredforawhileandfadedinthesuffocatingdarkness.Atideofexhaustionanddespairwashedoverhim.SensingthedesperategleaminHunter’seyes,Whistonbentovertogivehimatightembrace,comfortingthattheywouldbesafe.
Thenextmorning,thehelicopterreturned.Atthesightoftheblackdotonthehorizon,Whistonmadeasmokyfire.Theheavysmokecurlingupwardslowlyintothesky,heclaspedhishandstightly,prayinginthedepthofhisheartthatitwouldwork.Theblackdotgrewlargerandlargeragainsttheorangesky,sowastheirhopeofbeingrescued.Afterwhatseemedlikecenturies,thehelicopterfinallycametoahaltoverthemandloweredarescuer.Bubblingwithoverwhelmingectasy,Huntercouldn'thelpbouncingupsanddowns.Theyeventuallymadeittoescapefromthenightmare.Duringtheirpleasantchat,theylearneditwasexactlythemessageinthebottlethatsavedthem.鉴赏:_________________________________________________________不足:___________________________________________________________习作赏析:范文:Ittook30minutestogetbackupstreamtothebeachwherethey'dhadlunch.Withnoreasonableexpectationthattheirmessageinthebottlewouldfinditswaytoanyone,theypreparedtospendasafenightthere.Astheeveningworeon,theydecidedtheyprobablyweren'tgoingtogetrescuedthatnight,sotheypulledouttheirsleepingbags.Beforeturningin,Ramkrezaddedwoodtothefiretokeepthemountainlionsaway.However,justaftermidnight,theyheardahelicopterhoveringabovethem.Wildwithjoy,Whitson,Ramirez,andHunterwavedandyelledlikecrazy.Unfortunately,
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