2024年11月稽阳联考读后续写分析讲义-高三上学期英语一轮复习专项

2024年11月稽阳联考读后续写解析和范文阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。Isat.Heglaredatme.“YoucangiveittomeorIcantakeit,yourchoice.Whatwillitbe?”Ipulledthepackageofhairribbonsoutofthepocketofmyjeans,handedittohimandbegged,“You’renotgoingtocallmydad,areyou?”“I’mcallingthepolice.Theywillcallyourfather.”MyheaddroppedontomyhandsandIsobbed,“No,please!Can’tyoujustletmego?Icanpayyou.Ihavemoneyinmypocket.I’monlyfourteenyearsold.Please,Iwon’tevershopliftagain!”“Saveyourtears.Theywon’tworkonme.I’msickofyoubadkidsstealing,justforthethrillofit.”微信公众号ClassroomMissYanIsatthere,tremblinguncontrollably.Thepreviousexcitementbroughtbystealinglipstick,teenmagazineandallthatstuff...nowgavewaytoimmensefearandshame.Thepolicearrived,andthepolicemenwalkedmetotheirblackandwhitecarandopenedthebackdoor.Igotin,andtheydrovemethroughthemiddleofoursmalltown.IsloucheddownintotheseatsonoonecouldseemeasIlookedoutthewindowattheeveningsky.ThenIsawthesteeple(尖塔)ofmyfamily’schurch,andtheguiltpiercedmelikeadagger.“HowcouldIhavebeensostupid?I’vebrokenmyfather’sheart...andGod’s,”thoughtI.Wearrivedatthestation,andaroundwomanwithasquarefaceaskedmequestionsuntilIranoutofanswers.Shepointedtothedoorofalargeopencellandsaid,“Sit.Wait.”Iwalkedin,andmyfootstepsmadeanechothatbouncedoffthebars.ThetearsstartedagainasIsatdownonahardbenchandheardherdialthetelephoneandsay,“Ihaveyourdaughterinacellatthepolicestation.No,she’snothurt.Shewascaughtshopping.Canyoueandgether?Okay.You’rewele,goodbye.”Sheyelled,“Heykid,yourfather’sonhisway.”注意：1．续写词数应为150左右；2．请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。Aboutonehundredyearslater,Iheardhisvoicesaymyname.Afterwearrivedhome,Dadfinallyaskedme,“Why?”文本分析很多同学拿到文章就急着写，就想可以用哪一些华丽的句式和词汇，忽略了文章的背景和前提，常常文章情节就上下文不一致，这样分数基本不高。10分出头的样子。所以一定要多花几分钟看文章。微信公众号ClassroomMissYanIpulledthepackageofhairribbonsoutofthepocketofmyjeans,handedittohimandbegged,“You’renotgoingtocallmydad,areyou?”Thepreviousexcitementbroughtbystealinglipstick,teenmagazineandallthatstuff...nowgavewaytoimmensefearandshame.从上面两句的文字可以看出主角的父亲应该是对于女儿的偷窃行为是不知情的。而且主角之前还偷过一些唇膏，杂志，还有这次的发饰，偷这一些东西主要是为了刺激。IsloucheddownintotheseatsonoonecouldseemeasIlookedoutthewindowattheeveningsky.ThenIsawthesteeple(尖塔)ofmyfamily’schurch,andtheguiltpiercedmelikeadagger.微信公众号ClassroomMissYan这边点明了事情发生的时间是evening,而且这边有出现church这个意向，可以很好的作为主角反省，自我改变的一个意象。具体可以参考O’Henry的《警察和赞美诗》的结局部分描写（附在后面），可以参考一下。Shepointedtothedoorofalargeopencellandsaid,“Sit.Wait.”Iwalkedin,andmyfootstepsmadeanechothatbouncedoffthebars.这边的cell是指牢房，bars是指牢房的铁栏杆，主角是被关进了牢房。很多学生在这里理解错误了。“Ihaveyourdaughterinacellatthepolicestation.No,she’snothurt.Shewascaughtshopping.Canyoueandgether?Okay.You’rewele,goodbye.”从“no,sheisnothurt”这句话看出来她的父亲问的第一句话是“isshehurt?”所以这是一个关心女儿的父亲，没有第一时间责备女儿，而且马上人就来警局也可以看出是关心在意女儿的好父亲形象。有不少同学一上来就责备女儿，这就跟原文不一致了。但是女儿应该是觉得父亲是要责备她的，这边可以形成一个反差，进一步感化主角。总结：文章线索比较清晰，但是很多细节学生没有注意，注意力都集中在描写各种心理等，导致前后不一致，无效描写。立意可能也会产生偏差或者过于肤浅。写一写，打个样：Aboutonehundredyearslater,Iheardhisvoicesaymyname.Huddlingmyselfintheshadowofthecell,itriedtomakemyselfinvisible.Hemustbereallydisappointedandexasperateatme.Nevertheless,therewasnothingbutconcerninhisvoice.Asthesquarefacedofficeropenedthedoorofthecell,hescrutinizedmethoroughly,checkingifihadtheslightestinjury.Asuddenwaveofwarmthmingledwithinfiniteguiltyfloodedmyheart.Tearschokedallthewordsofexplanationandapology,soijustsilentlyfollowedmyfatheruntilhebailedmeoutandtookmeoutofpolicestation.Despitenumerousquestionsandwordsonbothofourminds,thewholeridebackhomewasinawkwardsilence.(113)微信公众号ClassroomMissYanAfterwearrivedhome,Dadfinallyaskedme,“Why?” Withhistremblingvoicefilledwithselfblamebreakingtheice,icouldnothelpreflectingonhowigotwhereiwasdefinitelynotbecauseofmylackofmoneyorlove,itwasjustabitrebellionwhichcouldbringmeahintofthrill.However,nevercouldiimagineitcouldhavesuchseriousconsequence.Noexcusecouldcoverupthewrongihaddone.“Iamsorry,dad...imadeamistake.”Iconfessed.Thepunishmentithoughtitotallydeserveddidn’te.Instead,ireceivedawarmandforgivinghug.AsIlookedoutofthewindow,steepleofmyfamily’schurchrevealeditselfinthegentlemoonlight,settinguparesolutioninsidemethatiwasgoingtomakeabetterpersonofmyself.(128)参考范文Onepossibleversion:Aboutonehundredyearslater,Iheardhisvoicesaymyname.Itwassoft,yetfilledwithamixofdisappointmentandconcern.Thenthewomancalledmeuptothedeskatthreetimesthenecessaryvolume.IkeptmyeyesonthefloorasIwalkedtowardthem.Isawmydad’sshoes,butIdidn’tspeaktohimorlookathim.Hesignedsomepapersandwewereallowedtoleave.Theairwasdarkandcoldaswewalkedtothecarinheavysilence.Thenhewhisperedinasadandfarawayvoice,“Mydaughter...athief...”Imeltedintoregretfultears.Themileshomefeltlikeforever.微信公众号ClassroomMissYanAfterwearrivedhome,Dadfinallyaskedme,“Why?”ItoldhimaboutthefirsttimeIstoleatubeoflipstickandhowIfeltequalamountsofthrillandguilt.Then,gradually,theguiltfadedasthethrillgrew.HottearsbitmyfaceasIsaid,“Pleaseforgiveme.I’llneverdoitagain.”DadrequiredmetomakealistofalltheplacesIstolefromandgotorepaytheowners.Thenextmorning,Ididexactlyasheasked.Itwasimpossiblyhard,butIdidit.Thankstohiscourage,Ineverstoleagain.欧亨利小说欣赏OnhisbenchinMadisonSquareSoapymoveduneasily,andherealizedthefactthatthetimehadeforhimtoprovideagainsttheingwinter.ThewinterambitionsofSoapywerenotofthehighest.InthemtherewerenodreamsofMediterraneanvoyagesorblueSouthernskies.ThreemonthsontheIslandwaswhathissouldesired.Threemonthsofassuredboardandbedandgoodpany,safefromnorthwindsseemedtoSoapythemostdesirablething.微信公众号ClassroomMissYanJustasthemorefortunateNewYorkershadboughttheirticketstoPalmBeacheachwinter,SoapyhadmadehisarrangementsforhisannualjourneytotheIsland.Andnowthetimehade.ThereweremanyinstitutionsofcharityinNewYorkwherehemightreceivelodgingandfood,buttoSoapy’sproudspiritthegiftsofcharitywereundesirable.Youmustpayinhumiliationofspiritforeverythingreceivedatthehandsofmercy.Soitwasbettertobeaguestofthelaw.微信公众号ClassroomMissYanSoapy,havingdecidedtogototheIsland,atoncesetaboutacplishinghisdesire.HelefthisbenchandwentupBroadway.Hestoppedatthedoorofaglitteringcafe.Hewasshavenandhiscoatwasdecent.Ifhecouldreachatableintherestaurant,theportionofhimthatwouldshowabovethetablewouldraisenodoubtinthewaiter’smind.Aroastedduck,withabottleofwine,acigarandacupofcoffeewouldbeenough.Suchadinnerwouldmakehimhappy,forthejourneytohiswinterrefuge.ButasSoapyenteredtherestaurantdoor,theheadwaiter’seyefelluponhisshabbytrousersandoldshoes.Stronghandspushedhiminsilenceandhasteoutintothestreet.Someotherwayofenteringthedesirablerefugemustbefound.AtacornerofSixthAvenueSoapytookastoneandsentitthroughtheglassofaglitteringshopwindow.Peoplecamerunningaroundthecorner,apolicemanattheheadofthem.Soapystoodstill,withhishandsinhispockets,andsmiledatthesightofthepoliceman.“Whereisthemanthathasdonethat?”askedthepoliceman.“Don’tyouthinkthatIhavehadsomethingtodowithit?”saidSoapy,friendly.ThepolicemanpaidnoattentiontoSoapy.Menwhobreakwindowsdon’tremaintospeakwithpolicemen.Theyrunaway.Hesawamanrunningandrushedafterhim,stickinhand.Soapy,disgusted,walkedalong,twiceunsuccessful.微信公众号ClassroomMissYanOntheoppositesideofthestreetwasarestaurantforpeoplewithlargeappetitesandmodestpurses.Soapyenteredthisplacewithoutdifficulty.Hesatatatableandatebeefsteakandpie.Andthenhetoldthewaiterhehadnomoney.“Goandcallacop,”saidSoapy.“Anddon’tkeepagentlemanwaiting.”“Nocopforyou,”saidthewaiter.“Hey!”ThenSoapyfoundhimselflyinguponhisleftearonthepavement.Herosewithdifficulty,andbeatthedustfromhisclothes.Arrestseemedarosydream.TheIslandseemedfaraway.Afteranotherunsuccessfulattempttobearrestedforharassingayoungwoman,Soapywentfurthertowardthedistrictoftheatres.微信公众号ClassroomMissYanWhenhesawapolicemanstandinginfrontofaglitteringtheatre,hethoughtof“disorderlyconduct”.OnthesidewalkSoapybegantosingdrunkensongsatthetopofhisvoice.Hedanced,cried,andotherwisedisturbedthepeace.ThepolicemanturnedhisbacktoSoapy,andsaidtoacitizen,“ItisoneoftheYaleboyscelebratingtheirfootballvictory.Noisy,butnoharm.”微信公众号ClassroomMissYanSadly,Soapystoppedhisuselesssinginganddancing.TheIslandseemedunattainable.Hebuttonedhisthincoatagainstthenorthwind.Inacigarstorehesawawelldressedmanwhohadsethissilkumbrellabythedoor.Soapyenteredthestore,tooktheumbrella,andwentoutwithitslowly.Themanwiththecigarfollowedhastily.“Myumbrella,”hesaid.“Oh,isit?”saidSoapy.“Well,whydon’tyoucallapoliceman?Itookyourumbrella!Whydon’tyoucallacop?Therestandsoneonthecorner.”Theumbrellaownerslowedhissteps.Soapydidlikewise.Thepolicemanlookedatthemcuriously.“Ofcourse,”saidtheumbrellaman,“well,youknowhowthesemistakesoccur…ifit’syourumbrellaIhopeyou’llexcuseme–Ipickeditupthismorninginarestaurant–ifit’syours,Ihopeyou’ll…”“Ofcourseit’smine,”saidSoapy.微信公众号ClassroomMissYanTheexumbrellamanretreated.Thepolicemanhurriedtohelpawelldressedwomanacrossthestreet.Soapythrewtheumbrellaangrily.Hewasangrywiththemenwhowearhelmetsandcarryclubs.Theyseemedtoregardhimasakingwhocoulddonowrong.AtlastSoapystoppedbeforeanoldchurchona