2世纪大学英语课文翻译unit

Unit1Book3rememberyourfirstlove?Allthoseexcitingandwonderfulemotions-thewayyourheartracedwhenthatspecialpersonwasnear-thoseanxious,awkwardmomentswhenyoudidn'tknowwhattosayordo?Andthen(formostofus)thatsadmomentwhenforonereasonoranotheritallcametoanendErnestHemingwayoncesaid,"Everylovestoryendsasatragedy"-buttheauthorsofthetextsinthisunithaveadifferentpointofview.TextAfocusesontheunexpectedsideeffectsoftheauthor'sfirstventureintoromance,whileTextBrecallstheupsanddownsoftheauthor'sgreatlovefor…hiscar!Finally,theauthorsofTextCoffersomefascinatingadviceabouthowtosuccessfullynavigateromanticrelationships.TextaHowIGotSmartAcommonmisconceptionamongyoungstersattendingschoolisthattheirteacherswerechildprodigies.Whoelsebutabookworm,withnoneofthenormalkid'stendencytoplayratherthanstudy,wouldgrowuptobeateacheranyway?I'vetrieddesperatelytoexplaintomystudentsthattheimagetheyhaveofmeasanenthusiasticdevoteeofbooksandhomeworkduringmyadolescencewasabitoutoffocus.Onthecontrary,Ihatedcompulsoryeducationwithapassion.Icouldneverquiteacceptthenotionofhavingtogotoschoolwhilethefishwerebiting.Butinmysophomoreyear,somethingbeautifulandexcitinghappened.Cupidaimedhisarrowandstruckmerightintheheart.Allatonce,Ienjoyedgoingtoschool,ifonlytogazeatthelovelyfaceinEnglishII.Myprincesssatnearthepencilsharpener,andthatyearIgroundupenoughpencilstofuelacampfire.Alas,Debbiewasfarbeyondmywildestdreams.Wewereseparatednotonlybyfiverowsofdesks,butbyabout50I.Q.points.ShewasthetopstudentinEnglishII,theappleofMrs.Larrivee'seye.Occasionally,Debbiewouldcatchmestaringather,andshewouldflashasmilethatradiatedintelligenceandquickenedmyheartbeat.Itwasasmilethatsignaledhopeandmademetemporarilyforgettheintellectualgulfthatseparatedus.Ischemeddesperatelytobridgethatgulf.Andoneday,asIwaspassingthesupermarket,anideacametome.Asigninthewindowannouncedthatthestorewasofferingthefirstvolumeofasetofencyclopediasatthespecialpriceof29cents.Theremainingvolumeswouldcost$2.49each.IpurchasedVolumeI--AardvarktoAsteroid--andbeganmy

ventureintotheworldofknowledge.Iwouldhenceforthbecomeaseekeroffacts.IwouldbecomeChiefBraininEnglishIIandsweepmyprincessoffherfeetwithasurgeoferudition.Ihaditallplanned.“Hi,"shedsaiMyfirstopportunitycameonedayinthecafeterialine.Ilookedbehindmeandthereshewas.“Hi,"shedsai“KnowwhereanchovAfterapause,Iwetmylipsandsaid,comefrom?”“KnowwhereanchovSheseemedsurprised."No,Idon't.”Ibreathedasighofrelief.“Theanchovylivesinsaltwaterandisrarelyfoundinfreshwater."Ihadtotalkfast,sothatIcoldgetallthefactsinbeforewereachedthecashregister.«FishermencatchanchoviesintheMediterraneanSeaandalongtheAtlanticcoastnearSpainandPortugal.”“Howfascinating,"saidDebbie,shakingherheadindisbelief.Itwasobviousthahadmadequiteanimpression.“Howfascinating,Afewdayslater,duringafiredrill,Icasuallywentuptoherandasked,“EverbeentotheAleutianIslands?”“Neverhave,"shereplied.“Mightbeaniceplacetovisit,butIcertainlywouldn'twanttolivethere,"Isaid.“Whynot?”saidDebbie,playingrightintomyhands.shesaid.«Well,theclimateisforbidding.Therearenotreesonanyofthe100ormoreislandsinthegroup.Thegroundisrockyandverylittleplantlifecangrowonit.shesaid.Idon'tthinkI'devencaretovisit,Thefiredrillwasoverandwebegantofileintothebuilding,soIhadtostepituptogetthenativesin.“TheAleutsareshortandsturdyandhavedarkskinandblackhair.Theyliveonfish,andtheytrapbluefoxesandsealsfortheirvaluablefur.”Debbie'seyeswidenedinamazement.a力Debbiesaid.OnedayIwasbrowsingthroughthelibrary.IspottedDebbiesittingatatable,absorbedinacrosswordpuzzle.Shewasfrowning,apparentlystumpedonaword.IleanedoverandaskedifIcouldhelp.a力Debbiesaid.Tryamah,Fou-letterwordforOrientalfemaleservant,Tryamah,Isaid,quickasaflash.

Debbiefilledintheblanks,thenturnedtostareatmeinamazement.Idon'tsaid.“Ijustdon'tbelieveit.Idon'tAndsoitwent,thatglorious,joyous,romanticsophomoreyear.Debbieseemedtorelishourlittleconversationsandhungonmyeveryword.Naturally,themoreIread,themoremyconfidencegrew.Intheclassroom,too,Iwasgraduallymakingmypresencefelt.Oneday,duringadiscussionofColeridge's“TheAncientMarineracrossthewordalbatross.“Cananyonetelluswhatanalbatrossis?”askedMrs.Larrivee.Myhandshotup.“Thealbatrossisalargethiatlivesmostlyintheoceanregionsbelowtheequator,butmaybefoundinthenorthPacificaswell.Thealbatrossmeasuresaslongasfourfeetandhasthegreatestwingspreadofanybird.Itfeedsonfishandshellfish.Thealbatrosshasanenormousappetite,andwhenit'sfullithastroublegettingintotheairagain.”Therewasalongsilenceintheroom.Mrs.Larriveecouldn'tquitebelievewhatshehadjustheard.IsneakedalookatDebbieandgaveherabigwink.Shebeamedproudlyandwinkedback.WhatIfailedtoperceivewasthatDebbieallthiswhilewasgoingsteadywithajuniorfromaneighboringschool--abasketballplayerwithaC+average.Therevelationhitmehard,andforawhileIfeltlikeforgettingeverythingIhadlearned.IhadsavedenoughmoneytobuyVolumeII--AsthmatoBullfinch--butwasstronglytemptedtoinvestinabasketballinstead.Ifeltnotonlyhurt,butbetrayed.LikeAgamemnon,butwithlessdrasticconsequences,thankGod.IntimeIrecoveredfrommywounds.ThenextyearDebbiemovedfromtheneighborhoodandtransferredtoanotherschool.Soonshebecamenomorethanamemory.Althoughtheoriginalincentivewasgone,Icontinuedporingovertheencyclopedias,aswellasanincreasingnumberofotherbooks.Havingtastedofthewineofknowledge,Icouldnotnowaltermycourse.For:Alittleknowledgeisadangerousthing:Drinkdeep,ortastenotthePierianspring.SowroteAlexanderPope,VolumeXIV--PaprikatoPterodactyl.斯蒂夫・普罗迪上学的孩子们中间有一种普遍的错误想法，即认为他们的老师当年都是些神童。不管怎么说，除了不像一般孩子那样生性贪玩、不愿学习的书呆子之外，还有谁愿意长大后当老师呢？我竭力向我的学生们解释我在他们心目中的形象----一个在青春期热衷于书本和作业的人----有一点被扭曲了。相反，我极为憎恨义务教育。我永远都无法接受在鱼儿上钩时不得不去上学的想法。但是，在我中学二年级的时候，发生了一件美妙而又激动人心的事。爱神丘比特瞄准他的箭，正好射中了我的心。突然间，我喜欢上学了，而这只是为了能够凝视英语二班里那张可爱的脸。我的公主坐在卷笔器旁边，那一年我削的铅笔足以点燃一堆篝火。可黛比却远远超出了我的期望。将我们隔开的不仅有五排课桌，还有约50分的智商。她是英语二班的尖子，拉里维太太的掌上明珠。偶尔，黛比会发觉我在盯着她看，这时她便会露出一个闪烁着智慧光芒，令我心跳加快的微笑。这是一个标志着希望、使我暂时忘记将我们分开的智力上的鸿沟的微笑。我想尽办法去跨越那条鸿沟。有一天，我经过超市，突然想到了一个主意。橱窗里的一块广告牌称商店正以29美分的特价供应一套百科全书的第一卷。其余各卷则为每卷2.49美元。我买下了第一卷----从Aardvark（土豚）到Asteroid（海星）----然后开始了在知识世界中的冒险历程。打那以后，我将成为一个事实探寻者。我将成为英语二班的首席智者，以渊博的知识使我的公主倾心于我。我全都计划好了。一天，在自助餐厅排队时，我的第一个机会来了。我往身后一看，她正好在那儿。“嘿，”她说。我犹豫了一下，然后润了润嘴唇说，“知道凤尾鱼是从哪儿来的吗？”她显得有点惊讶。“不，我不知道。”我松了口气。“凤尾鱼生活在咸水里，淡水里很少见。"我不得不讲得很快，以便在我们到达收银台之前，道出所有的细节。“渔民们在地中海和邻近西班牙、葡萄牙的大西洋海岸捕捉凤尾鱼。”“真有意思，”黛比一边说一边疑惑地摇着头。显然我已经给她留下了一个挺深的印象。几天之后，在一次消防演习时，我装作不经意地走到她身边，问，“去过阿留中群岛吗？"“从来没去过，”她答道。“也许是一个旅游的好去处，但我肯定不愿意住在那儿，”我说。“为什么不愿意呢？”黛比说，这正中了我的计。“呃，那儿的气候太险恶。在群岛的100多座岛屿中，没有一座有树木。地上遍布岩石，几乎没有植物能在上面生长。”“我想我连去旅游也不愿意，”她说消防演习结束了，我们开始排队进入大楼，所以我不得不赶紧再谈谈土著居民。“阿留中人身材矮小，体格健壮，有着深色的皮肤和黑色的头发。他们以鱼为主食，他们设陷阱捕捉北极狐和海豹，以获得它们珍贵的毛皮。”黛比惊讶地睁大了眼睛。一天，我正在图书馆里浏览书刊。我发现黛比坐在一张桌子旁，正专心致志地做着一个填词游戏。她皱着眉头，显然被一个词难住了。我弯下身去问我是否能帮上忙。“一个意为东方女佣的四字母词，”黛比说。“试一试amah,"我以闪电般的速度说。黛比填入空格，然后转过头惊讶地盯着我。“我真不敢相信，”她说。“简直不敢相信。”那个光辉灿烂的、充满欢乐的、富有浪漫色彩的二年级就这样继续着。黛比似乎很喜欢我们的简短交谈，全神贯注地听着我的每一句话。自然，我读得越多，信心也越强。在教室里，我也渐渐让别人感到了我的存在。一天，在一次关于柯尔律治的《古舟子咏》的讨论中，我们碰到了albatross（信天翁）这个词。“有谁能告诉我们信天翁是什么吗？"拉里维太太问。我立刻举起了手。“信天翁是一种大鸟，主要栖息在赤道以南的海域，不过也有可能在北太平洋发现它们。信天翁身长达4英尺，翼幅是鸟类中最大的。它以鱼类和带壳的水生动物为食。信天翁胃口很大，吃饱后便很难再飞上天。”许久，教室里鸦雀无声。拉里维太太无法相信她刚刚所听到的内容。我偷偷地瞥了黛比一眼，对她使劲眨了眨眼。她自豪得笑容满脸，也对我眨了眨眼。我未能察觉到的是那一阵子黛比正同一个邻近学校的三年级学生约会----一个平均分为C+的篮球运动员。这一发现对我打击很大，有一度我真想忘掉所有学过的东西。当时我已攒够了钱买第二卷----从Asthma（哮喘病）到Bulfinch（红腹灰雀）----但我真想去买一只篮球。我觉得自己不仅受到了伤害，而且还遭到了背叛。就象阿伽门农一样，不过感谢上帝，后果并没有那么严重。最终我从伤痛中恢复了过来。第二年，黛比搬离了这个街区，转到了另一所学校。很快，她便成了记忆中的人物而已。虽然最初的动力没有了，但我却继续钻研百科全书，以及越来越多的其它书籍。已经品尝过知识的美酒，此时我已无法改变我的前进方向了。因为：“一知半解，为害匪浅：开怀畅饮吧，否则就不要品尝埃里亚圣泉。”亚历山大・蒲柏如此写道，见第十四卷----从Paprika（红灯笼辣椒）到Pterodactyl（翼手龙）。

BeforeyoureadTextB,havealookatsomeofthefiguresofspeechtheauthorusestoconveyhisideas.Examinetheitalicizedwordsandphrasesinthesentencesbelow.Whatcomparisonsarebeingmade?Whatmentalpicturesdotheybringtoyourmind?Whatideasistheauthortryingtoconvey?Putinyouranswerbeforeclickingfortheanswerkey.Ayoungman'sfirstcarislessameansoftransportationthanamonumenttohisdiscoveryofyouthfulfreedom.Ayoungman'sfirstcariscomparedtoamonument-somethingthatis.(fairlypermanent,admirable,noble,significant,etc.)Beforelong,thatcarandIhadbecomethebestoffriends.Thementalpicturethebestoffriendsbringsisthatthecarandthewtiterare.(emotionallylinked,inseparable,enjoyingoneanotherandwillingtodoalotforeachother)Ipiledtenfriendsintothecar.Thewriterpushedhisfriendsintothecarina(disorderly/careless/thoughtless)wayperhapsasiftheywere(objects).Thecarwasfarfromabeauty,butshewasmine.Thewordsheisusedtoconveythewriter'saffectionforhiscar,asifitwasa(delicate,sensitiveemotional)being.I'veneverquestionedmyyouthfulemotionsthatdaywhenthemechanicdeliveredhissadverdict.Thewordverdictconveysafeelingof(inescapabledoom--alife-changingstatement).TextComingofAgeTextComingofAgeSamWalkerOkay,I'lladmitit.Sittingbehindthewheelofmyfirstcarbeforeitwastowedofftothejunkyard,Icried.Youcantellmeacarisonlysomuchglassandsteel,butI'llneverapologizeforlosingmycoolthatday.Ayoungman'sfirstcarislessameansoftransportationthanamonumenttohisdiscoveryofyouthfulfreedom.Atleastminewas.Ithadallstartedtwoyearsearlier:Soonaftermy16thbirthday,myparentsretiredtheoldredfamilycarandpasseditontome.Beforelong,thatcarandIhadbecomethebestoffriends.Wegaveridestojustaboutanyonewhoasked,anytime,anywhere,andhadallsortsofadventures.Someofthoseadventureswereprettyhair-raising.Onefamousafternoonafterschool,Ipiledtenfriendsintothecar,includingEric,whooptedtorideinthetrunkratherthanbeleftbehind.Wewerejustdrivingaround,feelinggood,talkingabouteverythingandnothing.AndalthoughIhadbeengoingonlyabout20milesanhour,thecollisionwithaschoolbusfullofseven-year-oldscrumpledthefrontofmycar.MyfirstthoughtwasofEricinthetrunk.Irushedoverandopenedittofindhimlyingtheremotionless.Igasped.Heopenedhiseyesandlaughed:“You'retheworstdriverontheplanet.”Bystandersstaredas,onebyone,tendazedhigh-schoolsophomorescrawledoutofmycar.Nooneonthebuswashurt,thoughonelittlegirlwascryingbecauseshehadtogotothebathroom.Asfarasthelittleboyswereconcerned,Iwasahero.Theycrowdedaroundmeinadmiration.Eventhepoliceofficersmanagedtosmile.Myparents--furious,ofcourse--settledonmypunishment:Iwouldusemyupcomingsummerwagestopayfortherepairs.Tolessenthefinancialblow,Iinsistedthatthemechanicfixthecarwithusedparts.Sowhentheworkwascompleted,theoldredcarhadagreenhood,ayellowfenderandabluedoor.Ididn'tcare.Thecarwasfarfromabeauty,butshewasmine.Thatsummer,onceschoolwasout,Ifoundmyfreedomexpandedhugely.OndayswhenmyfriendsandIwouldoncehaveriddenbikestothepublicpool,wedrovemycaralongtheriverroadtoexploreanoldabandonedtrainstation.Insteadofridingtobaseballgamesinthecoach'svanlikelittlekids,wenowrodeinmycarassophisticatedadults.Weworesunglasses,andspitsunflowerseedsoutthewindow,andfeltasgoodasifwe'dalreadywonthegame.OnenightwhileIwaswashingdishesattherestaurantwhereIworked,myfriendsremovedthewheelsfrommycarandleftitstandingdisabledandawkwardonconcreteblocksintheparkinglot.Decidingthebestreactiontotheirtrickwastoignoreit,Iwalkedhome.ThenextmorningIfoundthecarinfrontofmyhouse,coveredwithatwo-inchlayerofshavingcream.Onebyone,myfriendsgotdriver'slicensesandbroughtdifferentautomotiveoptionstoourfold.Butafterafewdaystryingoutwhoeverwasthenewest,wealwayswoundupbackinmyoldcar.Eventhen,Iwonderedwhy.Itwasn'tflashy-exceptforthosemulti-coloredparts,itlookedjustlikethesensiblefamilycarithadoncebeen.Itwasn'tfast-55milesanhourwasastretch.Anditcertainlywasn'tcomfortable-therewasnoairconditioning,andonhotdaysourbarelegsstucktotheseats.NotuntilitsenginedieddidIrealizewhathadmadethecarsospecial.Whilemostofmyfriendsinvestedincarstereosthatcouldrattlewindowsablockaway,Istuckwiththeoldoriginalradiothatbarelypickeduptwostationsonagoodnight.Mostly,wejustleftitturnedoff.TherewerenoboredsilencesordemandsthatIbuyabetterradio,though.Wefilledthemusicalvoidbyarguingaboutgirls,makingupsillysongsaboutoneanother,ortellingstories.Butthemomentsthattrulystandoutweremoresober.I'llneverforgetthesilenceaswedrovehomefromtheplayoffgameinwhichourteamwaseliminated.NorthenightswhenCharlietalkedabouthisparents'financialtroubles,Tomspokesadlyofhisfather'sabsence,andErictoldusofhisdreamofplayingprofessionalhockey.Sincewegraduatedfromhighschool,myfriendsandIhavespreadoutacrossthecountryandgrownintoadults.YetI'veneverforgottenmyyouthfulemotionsthatdaywhenthemechanicdeliveredhissadverdict.Inthatoldcarofmine,wehadstockpiledmemorieslikefirewood,knowingthatsomeday,somewhere,wewouldgatherasgray-hairedmentore-lighttheblazeofourfriendship.长大成人塞姆・沃克好吧，我承认。在我的第一辆汽车被拖到废品旧货栈之前，我坐在驾驶座上哭了。你可以对我说一辆车只是一堆玻璃和钢铁而已，但我永远不会为那天的失态而抱歉。一个年轻人的第一辆车与其说是一种交通工具，还不如说是他发现年轻人之自由的一种纪念物。至少我的车是这样。一切都是从那时的两年前开始的：我的16岁生日过后不久，我的父母报废了家里那辆红颜色的旧车，把它传给了我。很快，我和那辆车便成了最好的朋友。我们几乎在任何时候、任何地方让任何提出要求的人搭车，经历了各种各样的奇遇。其中有些奇遇真有点让人毛骨悚然。众所周知的一次是在一天下午放学后，我把10个朋友塞进汽车里，包括宁愿坐在行李箱里也不愿被丢下的埃里克。我们只是驾着车得意洋洋地兜风，海阔天空，东拉西扯。虽然我仅仅以20英里的时速开着车，但跟一辆载满7岁孩子的校车相撞仍把我的车头给撞瘪了。我首先想到的就是行李箱里的埃里克。我冲过去，打开箱盖，发现他躺在那儿一动不动。我倒吸了一口冷气。他却睁开眼睛，大笑着说：“你是这个星球上最差劲的驾驶员。”当10个神情恍惚的高二学生一个一个从我的车里爬出来时，站在一旁观看的人都看呆了。校车上没有人受伤，只有一个小女孩因为急着要上厕所而在哭。在那些小男孩的眼里，我是个英雄。他们钦佩不已地围在我身边。连警察们也勉强露出了笑容。我的父母当然非常生气，他们决定了对我的惩罚：我得用我那年夏天打工赚来的工资支付修理费。为了减轻这一经济上的打击，我坚持要汽车机修工用旧零件修车。所以在车子修好时，那辆旧的红车便有了一个绿色的发动机罩，一块黄色的挡泥板和一扇蓝色的车门。这我倒不介意。这辆车绝非美轮美奂，但她却是我的。那年夏天，学校一放假，我便发现我的自由空间大大扩展了。以前，我和我的朋友们得骑着自行车去公共游泳池，现在我们却可以驾着我的车，沿着河边的路，去踏勘一座废弃的老火车站。我们现在可以象谙于世故的成人一般驾着我的车去参加棒球比赛，而不再象小孩子一样坐教练的面包车去了。我们戴着太阳眼镜，把葵花子壳吐到车窗外，感觉好得就象已经打赢了比赛一样。一天晚上，我正在打工的餐馆里洗碟子，我的几个朋友趁机将我的汽车轮胎卸了下来，让车子无能为力地难堪地躺在停车场的水泥地上。我认为对于他们的恶作剧最好的反应就是置之不理。于是我走回了家。第二天早上我在家门口发现了我的车，上面涂满了两英寸厚的剃须膏。我的朋友一个接一个地拿到了驾驶执照，我们这帮人便有了不同的车辆选择。但是不论谁的车最新，试过几天之后，最终我们总是又回到我的旧车里。即使在那个时候，我也不懂这是为什么，它毫不花哨---除了那些多种颜色的部件，它看上去就象过去一样，是一辆实用的家庭汽车。它跑得不快---55英里的时速是极限。它当然也不舒适---没有空调，大热天我们光着的腿就粘在座位上。

直到它的发动机寿终正寝时我才意识到是什么使这辆车如此特别。当我大多数的朋友买了能将几条街区以外的玻璃窗震得格格作响的汽车立体声音响时，我一直在继续用原来那台即使在晴好的夜晚也只能勉强收到两个电台的旧收音机。通常，我们只是让它关着。不过，车里从来没有百无聊赖、默不作声的时候，也没有人要求我去买一台更好的收音机。我们谈论女孩子，相互乱编一些无聊的歌曲，或者讲故事，以此来填补没有音乐的空白。但是真正令人难忘的还是更为严肃的时刻。我永远不会忘记我们的球队在季后赛中被淘汰后我们开车回家一路上的沉默无语。也永远不会忘记在那些夜晚，查理谈论他父母的经济困难，汤姆忧伤地谈起他父亲的离家出走，以及埃里克告诉我们他要打职业曲棍球赛的梦想。自从我们高中毕业后，我和我的朋友们已经分散到全国各地，并已长大成人。然而，我一直不曾忘记那一天，当汽车机修工作出令人悲哀的裁决时，我那种年轻人的激动情绪。在我的那辆旧车里，我们已经堆积了如同火种般的记忆，并且知道在某一天，某一个地方，白发苍苍的我们会聚在一起重新点燃我们的友谊之火。TextCTextCRomancecanbedangerouslyseductive（弓I诱的，诱人的）.Afullmoon,softcandlelight-themoodiscomplete.Addanattractivepartnerandsomesoftbackgroundmusic,andwhocanresistfeeling“inlove"？This,afterall,iswhatthemagazineadssayloveissupposedtolooklike.Ifyoufindapartnerwhoprovidesthissettingandinvitesyouin,it'snaturaltothinkoflove.Romanceisbothanatmosphereandastateofmind.It'sgreattorelishitforawhile,butasasteadydietromanceisdangerouslyunder-nourishing.Ideally,romancewillbewoventhroughalovingrelationship,andrevivingitnowandthenisanexcellentwaytoexpressaffection（爱，感情）andcommitment（承诺，许诺）.Butifyouinsistthatyourrelationshipbeinaconstantstateofromance,you'reaskingtheimpossible.Notonlythat,butthepressureofyourdemandsmayendupdestroyingyourchancesforsuccessasatrulylovingcouple.Thisdoesn'tmeanthatweshouldautomaticallybesuspiciousofromanticbehaviororkeepourownromanticfeelingsunderlockandkeyIt'snaturaltoexpect,andtoexpress,somedegreeofromanceinanewrelationship.That'spartofwhatmakesarelationshipfunandexciting-butonlyifbothpartnersunderstandtherolethatromanceisplaying.Intruelove,thepurposeofromanceisnottodeceive（欺骗，蒙骗），buttoexpressrealaffectionandenrichanongoingrelationship.It'ssincere.Itpleasesbothpartnersandrenewstheircommitmenttoeachother.Itgivesthemabriefbreakfromthedailygrind,anopportunitytofocusoneachotherandtherelationshipinapositiveway.Onceyou'vedeterminedthatyouandyourpartnerbotharepreparedtoaccepttruelove,youneedtomakesurethetiesaretheretoholdthetwoofyoutogethersacouple.Thesestrengthswillformthebasisforyourlove,supportingyourrelationshipthroughthechallengestocome.Theyfallintothefollowingeightgeneralcategories（种类,类别）:

Physicalattraction.TheattractionneednotbeelectricWithmanylovingcouples,itbuildsgraduallyandgently,sometimestakingyearstoripen.Allthat'sreallyrequiredinthebeginningissomeattraction,mutualopenness,affection,anddesireforintimacy（亲密）.Sharedgoals,interests,andbeliefsystems.Coupleswithsimilarreligious,culturalandpoliticalbeliefstendtobemoreunitedthanthosewithdifferingbackgrounds,butdifferencescanbeovercomeifthere'sasolidfoundationofsharedgoalsandinterests.Mutual（相互的）respect,acceptance,andthedesiretopleaseeachother.Inrelationshipsbasedonfalselove,theseattitudesoftenflowfromonepartneronly.Intruelove,theremustbebalance,andbothpartnersmustaccepttheresponsibilityoflivinguptoeachother'sexpectations.Mutualhonestyandtrust.Dishonestyhasnoplaceintruelove;itcanonlyleadtomistrustanddivision.Fromtheverystart,youandyourpartnermustbetruthful,bothwithyourselvesandwitheachother.Realisticexpectationsforeachotherandtherelationship.Yourexpectationsshouldbebasedbothontherequirementsfortrueloveandonyourindividualpersonalitiesandneeds.Discussthemopenly,recognizingthatsomearenonnegotiable（无法协商的）whileothersneedtoremainflexible.Abalanceofdependenceandindependence.Trueloverequiresaconnection,butnotthesubmersionoftwoindividuals.Matureloversdon'tmeltcompletelyintoeachother,asobsessivecouplesdo,nordotheyremaindisconnected.Rather,theyinterlock（结合），sothatpartsoftheirlivesbecomeshared.Indiagramform,thethreepossibilitieslooklikethis:ObsessivecoupleDisconnectedcoupleObsessivecoupleDisconnectedcoupleLovingcoupleTosucceedinlove,youandyourpartnermustbeabletorelyoneachotherforcomfortandsupportwithoutexpectingallyourneedstobemetwithintherelationship.Partofyourlifemustremainseparate.Youneedsomefriends,activities,andintereststhatyourpartnerdoesnotshare.Inadditiontothepersonalbenefitsyougetfromtheseoutsidesources,theyprovideideas,energy,andinformationthatkeeptherelationshipopenanddeveloping.Acooperativeapproachtoproblems.Conflictandstrugglearenecessarytolifeandthereforealsotolove.Youandyourpartnermustacceptthisfactfromthestartandfigureouthowtodealwithproblems