英语笑话-亨利亲王与福斯塔夫

1、文档编码 : CM4Q8R10P9R10 HS5J8V2I9L5 ZT10L9Y5K6L2英语笑话 亨利亲王与福斯塔夫 Prince Henry And Falstaff Shakespeare Prince Henry Welcome, Jack Where hast thou been？FalstaffA plague on all cowards, I say, and a vengeance too ！ marry , and amen！（To an attendant） Give me a cupof sack, boy Ere I lead this life long , I l

2、l sew nethersocks ,and mend them, and foot them too A plague onall cowards！Give me a cup of sack, rogue Is thereno virtue extant ？（Drains the cup） You rogue , here slime in this sack,too There is nothing but roguery to befound in villanous man！Yet a coward is worse than a cupof sack with lime in it,

3、a villanous cowardGo thy ways, old Jack； die when thou wilt ,if manhood ,goodmanhood, be not forgot upon the face of the earth , thenam I a shotten herring There live not three good men unhanged in England； and one of them is fat ,and grownold ,a bad world , I say！ A plague on all cowards, I saystil

4、l！P Henry How now, woolsack ？what mutter you？Fal A king s son ！ If I do not beat thee out of thy kingdomwith a dagger of lath , and drive all thy subjects afore theelike a flock of wildgeese, I ll never wear hair on my facemore YouPrince of Wales！P Henry Why, what s the matter？Fal Are you not a cowa

5、rd？answer me that PHenryYe fat paunch, an ye call me coward,I ll stabthee Fal I call thee coward？ I ll see thee hanged ere I call theecoward： but I would give a thousand pound I could run as fast as thou canst You are straight enough in the shoulders,you care not who sees your back Call you thatback

6、ing of your friends？A plague upon such backing ！give me them that will face me Give me a cup of sack：I am a rogue , if I have drunk todayPHenry O villainthoudrank st last！ thy lips are scarce wiped since Fal All s one for that （He drinks ） A plague on all cowards,still say I！PHenryWhats the matter？F

7、al Whats the matter ？ here be four of us have taken a thousand pound this morning？, Jack ？ Where is itPHenryWhere is itFal Where is it ？ taken from us,it is ：a hundred upon poorfour of usPHenryWhat,a hundred , man？Fal I am a rogue, if I were not at halfsword with a dozen ofthem two hours together I

8、have escsped by miracle I ameight times thrust through the doublet； four through the hose；my buckler cut through and through ；my sword backed like a handsaw, ecce signum（Shows his sword）I never dealt better since I was a man： all would not doA plague on all cowards！PHenry What, fought you with them

9、all？Fal All ？ I know not what ye call all ； but , if I fought not withfifty of them,I am a bunch of radish：if there were not two or three and fifty upon poor old Jack twolegged creature, then am I no PHenryPray Heaven, you have not murdered some of themFal Nay, that s past praying for I have peppere

10、d two ofthem ： two I am sure I have paid ,two rogues in buckram suits I tell thee what, Hal ；if I tell thee a lie, spit inmy face , call me horse Thou knowest my old ward（Taking a position for fighting） Here I lay, and thus Ibore my point Four rogues in buckram let drive at mePHenry What, four ？ tho

11、u saidst but two, even nowFaLFour,Hal ！I told thee fourThese four came all afront ,and mainly thrust at meI made no more ado,but took all their seven points in my target, thus PHenrySeven！ why, there were but four , even nowFal In buckram PHenry Ay,four in buckram suitsFal Seven, by these hilts, or

12、I am a villain else Dost thouhear me , Hal ？PHenryAy, and mark thee too, Jack Fal Do so, for it is worth listening to These nine in buckramthat I told thee ofPHenry So, two more alreadyFal Their points being broken ,began to give me ground ；but I followed me close, came in foot and hand, and with a

13、thought , seven of the eleven I paidPHenry O monstrous ！ eleven buckram men grown ont oftwo ！Fal But, as ill luck would have it , three misbegotten knaves,in Kendal green ,came at my back,and let drive at me；for it was so dark , Hal , that thou couldst not see thy handPHenryThese lies are like the f

14、ather that begets them ；gross as a mountain ,open,palpable Why, thou knottypated fool ； thou greasy tallowtubFal What, art thou mad？art thou mad？is not the truth thetruth？P Henry Why, how couldst thou know these men in Kendalgreen , when it was so dark thou couldst not see thy hand？Come,tell us your

15、 reason ； what sayest thou tothis？ Come,your reason , Jack , your reasonFal What, upon compulsion ？No Were I at the strappado ,or all the racks in the world , I would not tell you on compulsion Give you a reason upon compulsion ！ If reasonswere as plenty as blackberries compulsion ,I would give no m

16、an a reason upon PHenryI ll be no longer guilty of this sinThis sanguinecoward this bedpresser ,this horseback breaker thishuge hill of fleshFal Away, you starveling, you eelskin, you dried neat stongue , you stock fish ！O for breath to utter what is likethee！you tailors yard , you sheath, you bow c

17、ase ,youvile standing tuckPHenryWell , breathe awhile ,and then to it again ；andwhen thou hast tired thyself in base comparisons,hear me speak but this Poins and I saw you four set on four ；you bound them and were masters of their wealth：mark now,how a plain tale shall put you down Then did we two s

18、eton you four , and with a word, outfaced you from your prize, and have it,yea,can show it you here in the house And,Fal staff, you carried your paunch away asnimbly,with as quick dexterity,and roared for mercy,and still ran and roared , as ever I heard a bull calfWhata slave art thou,to hack thy sw

19、ord as thou hast done ,and then say it was in fight？ What trick, what device ,what starting hole canst thou now find out, to hide thee from this open and apparent shame？Fal Ha！ha！ha！Dye think I didnt know you ,Hal？Why,hear me,my master ,was it for me to kill the heir apparent ？should I turn upon the

20、 true prince？ why, thou knowest I am as valiant as Hercules But beware instinct；thelion will not touch the true prince ；instinct is a great matter I was a coward on instinct,I grant you；and I shall think the better of myself and thee during my life,I fora valiant lion , and thou for a true prince Bu

21、t I am glad you have the moneyLet us clap to the doors ；watch tonight,pray tomorrow What！shall we be merry？shall we have a play extempore？PHenryContent ！ and the argument shall be, thy running a wag Fal Ah！no more of that,Hal ,if thou lovest me亨利亲王与福斯塔夫威廉 莎士比亚亨利亲王 欢迎,杰克！你从什么地方来？福斯塔夫 愿一切没胆的懦夫们都给我遭瘟,我

22、说,让天雷劈死他们！嘿,阿门！替我倒一杯酒来, 堂倌；日子要是像这样过下去,我要自己缝袜自己补袜自己上袜底哩；愿一切没胆的懦夫们都给我遭瘟！替我倒一杯酒来, 混蛋！世上莫非没有勇士了吗？ （饮酒）；混蛋,这酒里也搀着石灰水； 坏人总不会干好事； 可是一个懦 夫却比一杯搀石灰水的酒更坏,一个刁恶的懦夫！走你自己的路吧,老杰克；情愿什么时候死,你就什么时候死吧；要是在这地面之上,仍有人记得什么是男子汉的精神,什么是堂堂大丈夫的气慨的话,我就是一条排了卵的鲱鱼； 好人都上了绞架了, 剩在英国的总共仍不到 三个,其中的一个已经发了胖,一天老似一天；上帝挽救世人！我说 这是一个万恶的世界； 我期望我是一

23、个会唱歌的织工；我真想唱唱圣 诗,或是干些这一类的事情； 愿一切懦夫们都给我遭瘟！ 我仍是这样 说；亨利亲王 怎么,你这披毛戴发的脓包！你在咕噜些什么？福斯塔夫 一个国王的儿子！要是我不用一柄木刀把你打出你的国境,像驱逐一群雁子一般把你的臣民一起赶散,我就不是一个须眉男子；你这威尔士亲王！亨利亲王 这是怎么一回事？福斯塔夫 你不是一个懦夫吗？回答我这一个问题；亨利亲王 * ！你这胖皮囊, 你再骂我懦夫, 我就用刀子戳死你；福斯塔夫 我骂你懦夫！我就是眼看着你掉下地狱,也不来骂你懦夫哩；可是我要是逃跑起来两条腿能像你一样快,那么我情愿出一千镑；你是肩直背挺的人, 也不怕人家观看你的背； 你以为那

24、样便算是做你伴侣的后援吗？算了吧,这种见鬼的后援！ 那些情愿跟我面对面的人,才是我的伴侣；替我倒一杯酒来；我今日要是喝过一口酒,我就是个混蛋；亨利亲王 嗳哟,这家伙！你刚才喝过的酒,仍在你的嘴唇上留着残沥,没有擦干哩；福斯塔夫 那反正一样；（饮酒） 愿一切懦夫们都给我遭瘟！ 我仍是这么一句话；亨利亲王 这是怎么一回事？福斯塔夫 怎么一回事？咱们四个人今日早上抢到了一千镑钱；亨利亲王 在哪儿,杰克？在哪儿？福斯塔夫 在哪儿,又给人家抢去了；一百个人把我们四人团团围住；亨利亲王 什么,一百个人？福斯塔夫 我一个人跟他们十二个人短兵相接,足足战了两个时辰,要是我说了假话,我就是个混蛋；我这条性命逃了

25、出来,真算是一件奇迹哩；他们的刀剑八次穿透我的紧身衣, 四次穿透我的裤子；我的盾牌上全是洞, 我的剑口砍得像一柄手锯一样,瞧！我平生从来不曾打得这样有劲；愿一切懦夫们都给我遭瘟！亨利亲王 什么,你们跟这许多人对敌吗？福斯塔夫 这许多！我不知道什么叫做这许多；可是我要不曾一个人抗击了他们五十个, 我就是一捆萝卜； 要是没有五十二三个人向可怜的老杰克同时攻击,我就不是两条腿的生物；亨利亲王 求求上帝,但愿你不曾杀死他们几个人；福斯塔夫 哼,求告上帝已经来不及了；他们中间有两个人身受重伤；我信任有两个人已经在我手里送了性命,两个穿麻布衣服的恶汉；我告知你吧,哈尔,要是我向你说了谎,你可以唾我的脸,骂

26、我是马；你知道我的惯用的防势； 我把身子伏在这儿, 这样挺着我的剑；四个穿麻衣的恶汉向我冲了上来亨利亲王 什么,四个？你刚才说只有两个；福斯塔夫 四个,哈尔,我对你说四个；这四个人迎头跑来,向我全力攻击； 我不费吹灰之力, 把我的盾牌这么一挡, 他们七个剑头便一齐钉住在盾牌上了；亨利亲王 七个？咦,刚才仍只有四个哩；福斯塔夫 都是穿麻衣的；亨利亲王 嗯,四个穿麻衣的人；福斯塔夫 靠着这些剑柄起誓,他们一共有七个,否就我就是个坏人；你在听我吗,哈尔？亨利亲王 嗯,杰克,我正在全神贯注,洗耳恭听；福斯塔夫 很好,由于这是值得一听的；我刚才告知你的这九个穿麻衣的人亨利亲王 好,又添了两个了；福斯塔夫

27、 他们的剑头已经折断开头向后退却；可是我紧紧跟着他们,拳脚交加,一下子这十一个人中间就有七个人倒在地上；亨利亲王 嗳哟,奇事奇事！两个穿麻衣的人,摇身一变就变成十一个了；福斯塔夫 可是偏偏魔鬼跟我捣蛋,三个穿草绿色衣服的杂种从我的背后跑了过来,向我举刀猛刺；那时候天是这样的黑,哈尔,简直瞧不见你自己的手；亨利亲王 这些荒唐怪诞的谎话,正像只手掩不住一座大山一样,谁也骗不了的；嘿,你这头脑里塞满泥土的胖家伙,你这糊涂的傻瓜,你这下流龌龊、脂油蒙住了心窍的东西福斯塔夫 什么,你疯了吗？你疯了吗？事实不就是事实吗？亨利亲王 嘿,既然天色黑得瞧不见你自己的手,你怎么知道这些人穿的衣服是草绿色的？来,告