哈佛幸福课150407perfection课件

1、Perfec onizmtiOutlineWhat is Perfectionism?CharacteristicsConsequencesSuccess and HappinessSources of PerfectionismOvercoming PerfectionismCrisis (Wei Ji)DangerandOpportunity“The greatest mistake a man can make is to be afraid of making one.”Elbert Hubbard“Freedom is not worth having if it does not

2、connote freedom to err.”Mohandas Gandhi“The important work of moving the world forward does not wait to be done by perfect men.”George EliotPerfectionism is an incapacitating fear of failure that permeates our lives, especially those areas that we care about most.It is an approach, a cognitive and e

3、motional schema, that we hold toward the journey of our lives, toward the process of getting from point A to point B.Perfection Vs. ExcellenceCharacteristicsDefensiveOpen to SuggestionsHalf EmptyHalf FullOver GeneralizeRealisticNo Self-AcceptanceUnconditional AcceptanceStaticDynamicPerfectionExcelle

4、nceFear of failureFailure as feedbackFocus on DestinationJourney and DestinationLess Pain More Gain ?*#!#?Sustainable approach to growthProcrastinationHigher levels of self-confidenceLearn to fail or fail to learnThe Luck Factor (Wiseman, 2003)Creativity (Simonton, 1999)80/20 Rule (Paretos Principle

5、)Increase in flow experiences (Csikszentmihalyi, 1991)Source of PerfectionismConditioningDestination = Reward = AcceptanceJourney = Unrewarded = Means OnlySocial environmentPermission to be human?“Emphasizing effort gives a child a variable that they can control. They come to see themselves as in co

6、ntrol of their success. Emphasizing natural intelligence takes it out of the childs control, and it provides no good recipe for responding to a failure.”Intelligence versus EffortHarmful Praise? (Dweck, 2005)“When you praise kids intelligence and then they fail, they think theyre not smart anymore,

7、and they lose interest in their work. In contrast, kids praised for effort show no impairment and often are energized in the face of difficulty.”Fixed versus MalleableOvercoming PerfectionismAwarenessFocus on, and reward, effortActive AcceptanceBehavior changes attitudeMeditation and visualizationSetting a liberating goal or visionThe Platinum RuleHelping others?Applying the 3 Ps1. PermissionAcceptanceRespect for reality2. PositiveBenefit findingFailure as opportunityDistr