Unit 8 Literature 单元写作课-读后续写 课件-高中英语北师大版（2019）选择性必修第三册

选必三U8单元主题写作读后续写春风高中英语教研组学习目标1.掌握读后续写写作技巧，行文思路2.积累一些细节描写素材3.可以利用所学知识，准确表达自己观点，依据材料内容，合理完成读后续写《考试说明》

提供一篇350词以内的材料，要求考生依据材料内容、所给段落开头语及所标关键词续写一篇150词左右的短文。将其发展成一篇与给定材料有逻辑衔接、情节和结构完整的短文。续写部分分为两段。原文给出10处左右的标有下划线的关键词语，所续写短文应使用5个以上（教育部，2015）（满分25分）命题要求

短文

内容和情节

词汇和语句

1.词数:3502.体裁：记叙文或夹叙夹议为主3.故事逻辑性强，有情节，有起伏测试要求和特点1.有自由空间2.合乎情理和逻辑--有效续写1.至少使用5个以上的关键词2.每段段首句已给3.字数：150±20words半限定写作---“戴着镣铐跳舞”《考试说明》阅卷时主要考虑以下内容：1.与所给短文及段落开头语的衔接程度；2.内容的丰富性和对所给关键词语的覆盖情况；3.应用语法结构和词汇的丰富性和准确性；4.上下文的连贯性评分参考

阅卷时主要考虑以下内容：1.与所给短文及段落开头语的衔接程度；2.内容的丰富性和对所给关键词语的覆盖情况；3.应用语法结构和词汇的丰富性和准确性；4.上下文的连贯性。第五档（21-25分）（1）与所给短文融合度高，与所提供的段落开头语衔接合理。（2）内容丰富，应用了5个以上短文中标出的关键词语。（3）所使用语法结构和词汇丰富、准确。（4）有效地使用了语句间的连接成分，所续写短文结构紧凑。阅卷评分标准阅卷时考虑以下几个方面：(1)与所给短文及段落开头语的衔接程度;(2)内容的丰富性和对所标出关键词语的应用程度;(3)应用语法结构结构和词汇的丰富性和准确性;(4)上下文的连贯。相关性：情节与原文的相关性--情节一定要回照原文；开放性：续写的特性--构思在逻辑上一定要合理，--多种可能性择其优而续写所续部分：高立意、正能量、传递积极的情感态度原文与后续的融洽度；后续两段间的融洽度；段落开头语与后续语的融洽度。逻辑权重高于内容、语言和情感前后逻辑要一致，内容不偏离主旨逻辑靠内容支撑，内容靠语言表达融洽度高，衔接合理续写文本得高分的关键：思维上与上文连贯，融洽度高；与所给短文及段落开头语衔接合理；内容上脉络清晰、故事完整；语言上用词丰富、准确、句式多样；对周围环境和人物的心理描写生动、到位；书写美观、卷面整洁，字数在规定范围内。失分点分析内容逻辑语言书写（一）存在主要问题：

1、故事情节上的问题：1）与原文的融洽度不高。构思不合逻辑，有悖常理。比如：没搞清人物关系，没看懂人物性格，甚至还有更离奇的结局。2）未有效利用原文划线词，忽视了文章标题的暗示作用。存在主要问题：3、语言表达的问题1）基本句型上的错误多，句子架构能力弱;2）时态混乱：本应使用过去时的地方误用成其它时态;3）句子中动词滥用:分不清非谓语与谓语.4）直接引语与间接引语使用错误较多;5）词汇拼写或用法有误，出错较多。4、卷面书写问题（二）问题的主要原因

1、审题不清。没有读懂原文就下笔续写。2、基础知识掌握不牢固。常用单词的用法记忆不准确。3、句子架构能力弱。不能形成英语思维，常见语法问题如三单、主谓一致、时态语态仍是失分灾区。4、学生阅读量和社会生活阅历有限。方法技巧

1．在读懂原文的基础上，紧扣原文中心，以原文的结局为起点，写出故事情节的发展和变化。2．对原文故事没有写出的情节展开合理的推想，打开思路。多角度地想象出几种情况或结局，并择优而写。3．要注意前后照应，符合逻辑，防止自相矛盾。必须与上文紧密联系，使上下文融为一体。4．原文的主要角色，续文中都要安排“戏”，但不要引进影响事件结局的新角色。五个一致注意确保五个一致：1.要与原文的主题或作者的本来意图保持一致。2.要与原文的体裁、结构、写作手法保持一致。3.要与原文在人称，主体时态上保持一致。4.要与人物的思想行为、性格特点保持一致。5.要与原文的语言特点和叙事风格保持保持。致。探讨六要素的意义whenwhowherewhyhowwhat确定文章的主体时态确定发生地点，激活环境词汇用第几人称叙述，确定“入戏”人物，各自扮演何种角色通过逻辑，确定故事发展的可能性确定故事发展的每个阶段:开始的写作部分考查点，通过以上要素，确定续写内容Summary

1.读透原文，把握故事发展脉络，根据逻辑预测可能的结尾，择优而选；2.分析文章，确定人称，主体时态；

3.让每个角色入戏，想象出合理情节；4.激活话题词汇，使用多样句式。审题仔细，情节合理；词汇丰富，句式多样；过渡自然，结构完整；卷面清晰，书写优美；对学生应试的要求

读后续写一、写作指导（一）整体框架（二）重点突破：提升描写技能

一篇优秀的读后续写离不开适当的细节描写。因此，在续写的过程中，同学们要对关键人物及故事情节进行恰当的细节刻画，这也是同学们进行读后续写的一大难点。接下来我们将从细节描写素材分类集锦和具体案例应用来帮助同学们提升细节描写技能。.

..

..

.▲细节描写素材分类集锦分类集锦环境描写（自然环境&社会环境）1.The

sun

began

to

rise

in

the

east,

bathing

the

mountain

in

golden

sunshine.

太阳开始从东方升起，使这座山沐浴在金色的阳光中。（自然环境）2.It

was

very

dark,

and

the

wind

howled

horribly

around

her.

天很黑而且风在她的四周可怕地呼啸着。（自然环境）3.The

weather

was

hot,

without

a

breath

of

wind.天气炎热，连一丝风都没有。（自然环境）4.It

was

so

quiet

in

the

classroom

that

the

sound

of

a

needle

dropping

onto

the

ground

could

be

heard.

教室里如此安静以至于连一根针掉在地上的声音都能被听见。（社会环境）分类集锦动作描写（结合情绪表达）1.He

was

almost

dancing

for

joy.

他高兴得几乎跳起舞来。2.The

children

were

jumping

up

and

down

with

excitement.孩子们兴奋得跳来跳去。3.I

was

too

frightened

to

move,

but

two

girls

pushed

me

towards

him.

我吓得不敢动，但两个女孩把我推向他。续表分类集锦外貌与神态描写1.The

young

woman

is

tall

and

elegant.

She

has

a

great

amount

of

dark

hair

that

shines

in

the

sunlight.

这个年轻的女子身材高挑，举止优雅。她有一头在阳光下闪闪发亮的浓密的黑发。2.He

forced

a

smile

but

his

pale

face

gave

him

away.他勉强笑了一下，但他苍白的脸色出卖了他。3.Scowling,

the

little

boy

was

in

low

spirits

at

the

thought

of

parting

with

his

friends.这个小男孩愁眉苦脸的，为即将和朋友们分别而情绪低落。续表分类集锦心理描写1.A

sharp

sense

of

disappointment

came

over

him.

一种强烈的失望感袭上他的心头。（失望）2.Upon

hearing

the

bad

news，

she

felt

seized

by

a

burst

of

sadness

and

couldn't

help

crying

bitterly.

一听到这个坏消息，她感到一阵悲伤，忍不住痛哭起来。（悲伤）3.The

fear

that

consumed

her

every

waking

moment

made

it

hard

for

her

to

focus

on

anything

else.恐惧吞噬着她醒着的每一刻，使她很难把注意力集中在其他任何事情上。（害怕）续表greatsorrowcloudssb'seyes 满眼忧伤havetearsinone'seyes/tearsswiminsb'seyes 眼里噙着泪水tearsroll/run/stream/flowdownsb'scheeks 潸然泪下tearswellupinsb'seyes 泪如泉涌beovercomewithsorrow 悲伤不已悲伤②喜悦wearasmileonone'sface 面带笑容smilefromeartoear 笑得合不拢嘴sb'sfacelightsup/brightens 面露喜色jump/danceforjoy 手舞足蹈laughone'sheadoff 笑得前仰后合③愤怒tobeinafume;怒气冲冲；tobeangeredby/at......；因.....而发怒；tofly(fall)intorage(fury);勃然大怒；inasuddenfitofanger;一怒之下；tobefilledwithanger;满腔怒火；④惊讶gapeat 张口结舌地看gaspinastonishment 惊得倒吸一口气blinkinsurprise 吃惊地睁眼beshockedbeyondwords惊讶得说不出话来toone'sastonishment 令某人吃惊的是改写：Uponhearingthebadnews,_________________________________________________________________Skill1:实用词组替换动词，细化情感表达翻译：________________________________________________________________翻译：__________________________________________________shefeltseizedbyaburstofsadnessandcouldn’thelpcryingbitterly.Uponhearingthebadnews,shegotsadandcouldn’thelpcryingbitterly.一听到这个消息，悲伤席卷而来，她哭得不能自已。Lily开心地笑了一下，然后加入了讨论当中。Lilysmiledhappilyandthenjoinedtheheateddiscussion.改写：________________________________andthenjoinedtheheateddiscussion.Lilyworeashiningsmileonherface1.Toone's+情感名词,sb…令某人……的是，他/她……_________________,she

alsosawsomeberrybushes.(2016年10月浙江卷)令她极其高兴的是，她还见到了一片浆果林。Skill2:使用高分句型激活人物内心情感2.情感类形容词,sb…感到……,某人……_____________________,shehidherselfbehindthebigtree,holdingherbreath.既害怕又震惊,躲在大树后边,大气都不敢出。

TohergreatjoyScaredandshocked3.Withsth+doing/介词短语，sb…(伴随着)……,某人……_______________________________________,thelittleboyslowlyfellasleep.小男孩慢慢睡着了，眼睛里噙满了泪水。4.Seeing/Hearing/Thinking/Knowing/Realizing…,sb…看到/听到/想到/得知……,某人……____________________________________________________________________,shefeltherselfthrownintoaworldofhopelessness.一想到又要独自一人在野外度过一个晚上，她感觉自己陷入了完全的绝望当中。WithtearswellingupinhiseyesThinkingthatshehadtospendanothernightinthewildbyherself(1)

tookmybreathawaywhenhebrokethenewstomeIwasadmittedtothemostfamouslawuniversity.

他带给我消息说我被最著名的法律大学录取了，我激动不已。(2)

crowdedintomymind.一阵恐惧/焦虑涌上我的心头。(3)

spreadoverherface.她脸上荡漾着柔美的微笑。Skill3:用事物代替人作主语,赋能各项情感（无灵主语）Excitement

Afloodoffear//anxietyAgentlesmile

1.比喻（simile明喻

&metaphor暗喻）Myheartislikeasingingbird.我的心像一只歌唱的小鸟Heisalyingdemon,notaman!他是一个撒谎的恶魔，不是人！2.夸张（hyperbole）他们哈哈大笑起来。翻译：Theylaughedheavily.改写：Theyalmostdiedlaughing.3.拟人（personification）Hereyesdanced

withgreatexcitement.她的眼睛欢快地上下打量着。Everynerveinhisbodywarned

himnottogoanyfurther.他身体上的每一根神经都警告着他不要走太远。Skill4:使用修辞手法深化情感1.请尝试续写一个等待和老友重逢以及终于等到老友的情节。利用环境描写烘托人物心理并侧重人物高兴和激动的心理描写。（词数80左右）

She

stood

by

the

window,

joyfully

and

patiently

watching.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Golden

sunlight

danced

in

her

long

hair

and

the

children's

laughter

floated

in

theair.（环境描写，烘托人物心理）

She

stared

at

the

end

of

the

road,

hoping

her

close

friend

would

come

earlier.

A

wave

of

happiness

and

excitement

seized/swept

over/came

over

her

when

she

caught

sight

of

a

familiar

figure.（心理描写）

Her

heart

beat

with

joy,

and

a

shining

smile

lit

up

her

face.（心理描写）

She

ran

to

her

friend

and

threw

herself

into

her

friend's

arms.（动作描写，人物心理的外在表现）▲具体案例应用2.请尝试续写一个父亲发怒的情节。利用动作、神态和语言描写表现人物的愤怒。续写中可适当添加对"我"的紧张害怕的心理和动作描写。（词数80左右）

Never

had

my

father

been

so

furious

in

all

his

life

about

my

behavior

at

the

party._____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

With

unstoppable

rage

in

his

eyes,

he

was

like

an

angry

lion.（神态描写）

His

face

turned

purple

with

anger,

but

he

didn't

shout

in

anger

as

usual.

He

just

glared

at

me

silently.（神态描写）

His

staring

eyes

really

frightened

me.（心理描写）

I

swallowed

nervously

and

looked

away.（动作描写）

After

a

few

moments'

silence,

he

threw

his

coat

on

the

sofa

with

annoyance,

and

murmured,"What

should

I

do

with

you?"（动作描写，语言描写）3.请尝试续写一个王华考试失利之后难过的情节。利用动作、神态、心理等细节描写表现人物的难过。（词数80左右）

Wang

Hua

didn't

get

an

A

in

the

exam

as

expected.______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

He

shook

his

head

andlooked

upset.

His

friend

patted

his

shoulder,

and

comforted

him.

He

managed

a

smile

and

dropped/lowered

his

head

to

hide

his

sadness.（神态描写，动作描写）

Then

he

headed

slowly

home,

tears

in

his

eyes.（动作描写，神态描写）

In

front

of

the

door,

he

took

a

deep

breath,

opened

the

door

and

stepped

inside.（动作描写）

As

soon

as

he

saw

his

mother,

a

wave

of

sadness

welled

up

within

him.（心理描写）

He

threw

himself

into

his

mother's

arms

and

buried

his

head

in

her

skirt,

weeping.（动作描写）4.请尝试续写Jenny摔倒在地上后的情节。利用环境、动作、神态和心理描写表现人物的尴尬、羞愧和难过等。（词数80左右）

Jenny

was

performing

in

front

of

the

whole

class

when

suddenly

she

fell

heavily

to

the

ground._________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Kids

laughed

in

surprise.（环境描写）

Standing

uncomfortably

and

hopelessly

and

feeling

as

if

the

whole

world

were

laughing

at

her，Jenny

was

so

ashamed

that

the

color

flooded

her

cheeks.（心理描写,神态描写）

She

must

be

really

stupidto

fall

down

in

the

game!（心理描写）

Disappointment

and

embarrassment

written

on

her

burning

face,

she

felt

tears

well

up

inher

eyes.

She

ran

swiftly

to

her

seat,

buried

her

face

in

her

hands

and

wept.（动作描写）二、读后续写

阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。Saving

the

Carnations（康乃馨）

[2024辽宁大连市三校模拟考试]Dawn

broke.

Regina,

aged

14,

opened

her

sleepy

eyes

and

looked

out

of

the

window

at

the

foggy

field

below.

"NO!"

she

cried,

now

fully

awake.

Buttermilk,

a

cow,

was

in

Mama's

carnation

garden.

"I

must

have

forgotten

to

close

the

gate

last

night,"

Regina

thought

as

she

pulled

a

sweatshirt

over

her

head.

Mama

was

planning

to

sell

the

carnations

at

the

fair

the

next

week.

But

Buttermilk

was

eating

the

flowers.

Regina

hurried

outside

and

grabbed

the

lead

rope

on

the

wall.

"Why

can't

you

stay

in

the

field?"

she

called

to

Buttermilk

as

she

headed

across

the

yard

to

the

carnation

garden.

Buttermilk

still

stood

there

chewing

the

tender

flowers.

"When

I

grow

up,

I'll

be

an

artist

and

paint

pictures

all

day,"

Regina

thought,

annoyed.

"I'll

not

own

a

cow.

Too

much

trouble."

Regina

had

been

fond

of

painting

since

the

day

she

had

memory.

She

would

like

to

not

only

help

with

family

but

see

birds

and

flowers

alive

under

her

brush.

Just

as

Regina

was

about

to

throw

the

lead

rope

onto

Buttermilk's

collar,

the

family

dog

Blue,

rounded

the

corner

of

the

house,

barking

loudly

and

furiously.

Buttermilk

couldn't

stand

it

and

ran

off,

tearing

through

the

carnations.

It

finally

ran

through

the

open

gate

and

into

the

field

outside.

"Thank

goodness!"

Regina

said

as

she

closed

the

gate

and

secured

the

lock.

But,

as

she

turned

to

look

at

the

flower

garden,

most

of

the

carnations

were

either

eaten

or

trampled

（践踏）.

Mama

and

Dad

came

out

of

the

house.

"What's

going

on?"

Mama

asked.

She

looked

sadly

at

her

garden.

"I

forgot

to

close

the

gate,"

Regina

said.

"I'm

so

sorry."

"I

know

you

are,"

Mama

sighed

and

gave

Regina

a

hug.

Regina's

heart

was

heavy

as

she

went

back

into

the

house.

Mama

had

prepared

much

for

the

fair

but

now

half

of

her

efforts

were

in

vain.

Regina

decided

to

think

of

a

way

to

make

it

up

to

her

mother.

The

problem

tasked

Regina's

mind.

Could

she

plant

other

flowers

in

a

week?

Not

enough

time.

Could

she

make

use

of

the

carnations

in

pieces?

Not

enough

magic.

Regina

found

no

way

out.

注意：续写词数应为150左右。Paragraph

1:

All

of

a

sudden,

a

flower

painting

on

the

wall

caught

Regi