Sex and the City《欲望都市（1998）》第一季第三集完整中英文对照剧本

“已婚者的光环”住在纽约这种城市大家最喜欢做的事情之一OneofthebestthingsaboutlivinginacitylikeNewYork就是逃离它isleavingit.我的朋友佩萱丝和她先生Myfriend,Patienceandherhusband邀请我到汉普顿度周末invitedmeouttotheHamptonsfortheweekend.佩萱丝和彼得是完美的一对PatienceandPeterweretheperfectmarriedcouple.他们风趣聪明Theywerefun,smart,而且像杰克鲁服饰目录上的模特儿andtheylookedliketheyfelloutofaJ.Crewcatalog.若他们不是住在海边的别♥墅♥Iftheirhousewasn'trightonthebeach,我一定会讨厌他们Iwouldhavehatedthem.他进了计程车然后靠过来坐在我身边Sohegetsinthecabandheslidesupnexttome.然后呢？Yes?我们打得火热Anditishot.从汉普顿和西百老汇街口一直到七十二街和麦迪逊大道ItishotallthewayfromHoustonandWestBroadwayto72ndandMadison.来汉普顿做客的人晚餐前得和主人闲话家常Hamptonhouseguestsarealwaysrequiredtosingfortheirsupper.股票经济人提供理财方案Brokersgiveinvestmentadvice,建筑师则给与设计的意见architects；designadvice,单身朋友则将艳遇之类的事告诉已婚友人singlepeoplegivemarriedfriendstidbitsfromtheirsexualescapades.次日早晨我醒来时觉得神清气爽ThenextmorningIwokeupfeelingrestedandfabulous.等不及到户外欣赏美丽风景Icouldn'twaittogooutandtakeinthespectacularview.早安Morning.We'dloveto.那天晚上米兰达对我大吐苦水Laterthatnight,Mirandagavemethelowdownonherday.你想这是因为他们以为你们是一对吗？Soyouthinkit'sjustbecausetheythinkthatyou'reinacouple?我知道两年以来Iknowit.Tvebeenwiththefirmfortwoyears.我们鲜少交谈He'sbarelyevenspokentome.他却突然要我叫他“契普”Allofasudden,it's"Chip."一个名叫契普的律师令人不由得喜欢他AlawyernamedChip,gottalovethat.他们好不容易了解我以后好像松了一口气Andheseemedsorelievedtohavefinallyfiguredmeout.你真会赴宴吗？Soyou*reactuallygonnagothroughwiththedinner?没错Yup.在公♥司♥里我需要战友I'mdeterminedtomakepartnerinthisfirm就算得当同性恋也再所不惜evenifIhavetobealesbianpartner.米兰达离去后我想了一想AfterMirandaleft,Ihadathought.或许冷战的起因不是恨Maybethecoldwarisn'tabouthate.而是恐惧对于未知的恐惧Maybeit*saboutfear,fearoftheunknown.已婚者并不恨单身贵族Marriedpeopledon'thatesingles.只是想“弄清楚”我们的想法Theyjustwantus"figuredout."该是停止猜忌渗透敌方阵营的时侯了Ifeltitwastimetostopallthisspeculationandinfiltratetheenemycamp.于是我和我最喜爱的夫妻档大卫和莉莎共进午餐Lunchwithmyfavoritecouple,DavidandLisa.与其说婚姻生活我比较倾向说共同生活Well,Idon'tthinkofusasmarriedsomuchastogether.我们结婚了吗？-Wait,arewemarried?-Uh,yeah.记得当时你披上白纱我们还收到很多餐具吗？Rememberthatdayyouworethewhitedressandwegotalltheflatware?记得Oh,yeah.或许我不该再和其他男人约会IguessIshouldstopseeingothermen.你呢？喜欢单身生活吗？Hey.Whataboutyou?Youlikebeingsingle?我觉得还不错Yeah.Mostofthetime,yeah.有时侯则不然比如…Andthentherearetheothertimes,youknow,likeum,像家庭聚会时likefamilyfunctionswhenyou'retheonlyonethafsnotmarried得和小孩坐一桌andtheysityouatthekid'stable.或看你们用同一支叉子吃东西我…Or,um,orwhenyoutwoeatoffthesamefork,Ijust...那真是太甜蜜了Oh,man,that'ssosweet.别哭出来Don'tstartcrying.他很多愁善感He'ssuchapussy.你将来打算结婚对吗？Butyoudowanttogetmarriedsomeday,right?不知道Idon'tknow.我觉得自己可能不适合结婚I'mbeginningtothinkImaynotbethemarryingkind.真的吗？Really?话才刚说完…Nosoonerhadthewords我自己已经开始怀疑了comeoutofmymouththenIwonderediftheyweretrue.你们好Hey!你好西恩-Hey,Sean!-Hey!好一个惊喜Whatasurprise.-见过凯莉•幸会-Thisisourfriend,Carrie."Hi.我们正要吃甜点We'rejustabouttohavedessert..要不要一起享用？.好-Doyouwanttojoinus?-Uh,sure,sure.我真是太意外了Thisissuchasurprise.另一个让我讨厌单身的场合…AnothertimeIhatebeingsingle就是已婚的朋友“意外〃帮你介绍对象iswhenmarriedfriends"surprise"fixyouup.喝了两杯浓咖啡吃了一个提拉米苏后Twoespressosandatiramisulater,我得知西恩是三兄弟中最小的IhadlearnedthatSeanwastheyoungestofthreebrothers,他有自己的投资公♥司♥hadhisowninvestmentfirm而且即将迁入新购置的公♥寓♥andwasabouttomoveintoanapartmenthehadjustpurchased.你知道这全是安排好的对吗？Youknowthiswasafix-up,right?其实你进门前我就闻出来了Oh,please,Icouldsmellitbeforeyouwalkedinthedoor.我父母是相亲结婚的Myparentsmetonafix-up,下个月是他们结婚41周年纪念andtheywillbemarried41yearsnextmonth.真是美满Wow；that'sgreat.这时我才了解到他很期待结婚ItwasthenIrealized,Iwashavingcoffeewiththemarryingguy.结婚是这个魅力十足ThatelusiveandrareManhattanman曼哈顿男子的最终目标whosesightsweresetonmarriage.我可以再约你出来吗？So,Carrie...canIseeyouagain?当然可以Sure.接下来一周半的时间我和西恩一起看了场电影…Overthenextweekandahalf,ImetSeanforamovie...又看了另一部电影Imethimforanothermovie.我在城廉斯索诺玛帮他挑了一个高级起司磨碎器AndIhelpedhimpickoutatopofthelinecheesegrateratWilliams-Sonoma.十二号♥我要办乔迁派对Oh,mybuddiesaregivingmeabighousewarmingonthe12th.邀请你参加带朋友一起来Youshouldcome,andbringyourfriends.听起来好像很有意思Soundslikefun.谢谢你陪我共度美好时光Thanksforagreatday.他就像DKNY服饰活生生的翻版HewaslikethefleshandbloodequivalentofaDKNYdress.虽然明知和自己的风格不合Youknowit'snotyourstyle,butit'srightthere,但顺便试穿也无妨soyoutryitonanyway.十二号♥当天晚上…Itwasthenightofthe12th.一对假的女同性恋到纽约东区OntheEastSide,apseudolesbiancouple出席一名共和党员的晚宴attendedaright-wingRepublicandinnerparty.你们来了Hey!西区则有三个单身女郎OntheWestSide,atrioofsinglegals参加一个单身汉的乔迁派对wenttoasingleguy'shousewarmingparty.他的朋友帅吗？Sotellme,arehisfriendscute?不知道我从没见过他们Idon'tknow,Ihaven*tmetthemyet.你是怎么在一周内交上新男朋友？Howdidyoumanagetogetanewboyfriendinaweek?他不是我的男朋友He'snotmyboyfriend.我只是在试试而已He'sjustsomebodyI'mtryingon.准备好了吗？AllrightReady?所有宾客都成双成对EverywhereIlooked,peoplewerestandingintwos.这里简直像有房♥租限制的诺亚方用ItwaslikeNoah'sUpperWestSiderent-controlledark.他们全是夫妻档It'sallmarriedcouples.莎曼珊瞪了我一眼好像我将她出♥卖♥♥♥给敌人SamanthagavemealooklikeIhadsoldhertotheenemy只是为了换取巧克力棒和尼龙袜forchocolatebarsandnylons.这是给你的恭喜Oh,hey,thisisforyou.你想必就是夏洛特Oh,youmustbeCharlotte.幸会-Hi.-Hi.你一定是莎曼珊AndyouhavetobeSamantha.没错请问吧台在哪里？Yeah.Where'sthebar?在厨房♥你一定找得到就是有瓦斯炉的那一间Uh,kitchen,youcan'tmissit,roomwiththestove.这里真漂亮Thisapartmentisamazing!谢谢我花了很多年规划Thanks.Tvebeenplanningitforyears.我带你参观Comeon,Illgiveyouguysthegrandtour.我们从已婚夫妻旁走过时AsImovedthroughthemarriedcouples,我发现一件事…Inoticedsomethingwasdifferent...她们眼中没有恐惧怜悯也不会对我品头论足Nofear,nopity,nopointing.难不成西恩的朋友都是善良的反战者吗？WereSean'sfriendscoldwarconscientiousobjectors还是因为我已经被她们“摸清楚了”?orwasitjustthatIwasHfiguredout"?会计师告诉我最好买♥♥低风险的股票Myaccountantsaysthatitrsbesttogowithlowriskstocks.这要视清况而定你对投资持何种心态？Well,thatdepends.Imean,whatareyourexpectations?我也不太确定Well,I'mnotsure.甜心我要介绍朋友给你Honey,Ineedyoutocomeoverhereandmeetsomeone.好莎曼珊莎曼珊见过伊莲Sure.Uh,thisisSamantha,Samantha,thisisElaine.我是他太太Hiswife.甜心我们去别的房♥间Honey,Ireallyneedyouintheotherroom.好Sure.很高兴和你聊莎曼珊Itwasnicetalkingtoyou,Samantha.这里是书房♥Andthisistheden.是高级皮椅我爰死它们了Oh,youhaveoneoftheseleatherclubchairs.Ilovethese.谢谢目前我把这里当办公室Thanks,fmusingthisroomasanofficenow,但有一天…这里会变成小孩的房♥间butsomedaythisisgonnabethekid'sroom.看Look.三年前我在阿斯彭买♥♥的IgotthisthreeyearsagoinAspen.喜欢吗？Whatdoyouthink?这是我的错Okay,Ioweyou.我不知道他的朋友全都结婚了Ididn'tknowthatallhisbuddiesweregonnabemarried.天啊你在喝龙舌兰？Oh,myGod,you'redoingtequilashots?你看那边那个男的Youseethatbuddyoverthere?我上过他Ifuckedhim.再看那边那一个Seethatbuddyoverthere?我也上过他Ifuckedhimtoo.我没想到还会见到他们IneverthoughtI'dseethemagain.你已婚的前男友都该贴上标签Well,maybeweshouldstarttaggingyourmarriedmen这样你才能追踪他们的动向andthatwayyoucankeeptrackofthem.他会向你求婚He'sgonnaaskyoutomarryhim.不可能Heisnotgoingtoaskmetomarryhim.我们才约会一周I'vebeendatinghimaweekandahalf.除非慎重考虑结婚的事NoguybuysaclassicsixontheUpperWestSide否则没人会在上西城区买♥♥这么好的房♥子unlesstheyareseriouslythinkingaboutmarriage.有人会看手相夏洛特则会观察不动产Somepeoplereadpalms,Charlottereadrealestate.若你成为那些已婚白♥痴♥的一员Ifyouturnintooneofthosemarriedassholes,我会毙了你rilkillyou.西恩好得没话说Seanisthegreatestguy,而且又喜欢小孩andheloveskids.他不但有自己的事业Plus,heownshisownbusiness,银行里还有三十万元存款andhersgot$300,000inthebank.我们都和他有过一腿Webothsleptwithhim,他的床上功夫好极了andheisgreatinbed.我在这场乔迁派对待了一个半小时Anhourandahalfintothishousewarming,从派对的贵宾变成了战俘Ihadgonefrompartyguesttoprisonerofwar.莎曼珊醉得一蹋糊涂我得送她回去休息Samanthaistotallydrunk.Tvegottogetheroutofhere.我和你们一起走You*renotgoinganywherewithoutme.凯莉Carrie!天啊又有朋友来了Oh,God,morefriends.惊喜吧Surprise!我的确感到讶异Itcertainlywas.上回我见到佩萱丝时她在公车上推我LasttimeIsawPatienceshewasshovingmeonabus.西恩告诉我们你们在约会WhenSeantoldusyouandheweredating,我们也非常高兴wewerejustsothrilled.上次在你们家发生的事…Well,listen,aboutwhathappenedatyourbeachhousetheotherday...别提那件事Don'tmentionit.我不知道…Well,Ijust...fmnotevensure...别再说下去了Isaiddon'tmentionit.这场派对糟得不像话Thispartyisterrible.你是哪位？Whoareyou?我的朋友佩萱丝和她的丈夫彼得Um,thisismyfriendPatience,andthisisherhusbandPeter.久仰大名Iheardaboutyou.■像胡椒碾磨器般的大弟弟-我们得走了-Bigpeppermilldick!-Okay,wegottago!我们的停火协议刹那间破灭Andjustassuddenly,ourlittlecease-firewasover.同时在纽约的另一端形势渐趋和缓Meanwhile,acrosstown,thingswerewindingdown.非常感谢你的招待我们都玩得很尽兴Thankyousomuch.Wereallyhadagreattime.我也一样Oh,asdidweall.她真是个好伴侣Sheisarealfind.不久后我们会再办一次We'lldoitagainsoon.先去按电梯Filmeetyouattheelevator,okay?我稍后就来Ijustneedto...恐怕我们办不到Wecan'tdoitagainsoon.席德和我并不是一对SydandIaren'treallyacouple.其实我们根本不是同性恋Infact,we'renotevenreallylesbians.她是但我不是Well,Sydis,I'mnot.我只是想借机和你谈谈我在公♥司♥的工作Ijusttookadvantageofthesituationtobendyourearaboutmyworkatthefirm.很聪明的做法Shrewdmove,counselor.别放在心上Noharmdone.谢谢Thankyou,sir.我太太会大失所望Mywifewillbedisappointed.她希望为我们的社交圈增加一对女同性恋Shewaslookingtoaddalesbiancoupletoourcircle.搭电梯时Astheyrodebetweenfloors,米兰达心中想着若她有伴侣生活会多自在…Mirandaconsideredhowmucheasierherlifewouldbe姑且不论对方是男是女ifshewereinacouple,anycouple.我真的不是同性恋Yup,definitelystraight.完全正确Yeah...youare.抱歉Sorry.米兰达为自己不是同性恋而懊恼WhileMirandacursedherheterosexuality想着这场战争里自己能撑多久的同时andwonderedhowmuchlongershecouldfightthewar,夏洛特把错怪在龙舌兰酒上硬逼莎曼珊搭上计程车CharlottecursedtequilaandforcedSamanthaintoacab.她认为莎曼珊喝的太醉不能独自回家ShedecidedSamanthawastoodrunktogethomealone坚持让她睡在沙发上andinsistedshespendthenightonhercouch.到家了We'rehome.终于到家了We*rehome.Oh,boy!我帮你开门Letmegetthatdoorforyou.你好Hi.够了…Allright,allright.-我喜欢他-再见-Ilikeyou!-Bye,bye.她扶莎曼珊上楼上♥床♥睡觉但事情还没告一段落ShegotSamanthaupstairsandsafelytobed,orsoshethought.几小时后Acoupleofhourslater,莎曼珊醒了依然是酒醉的单身女郎Samanthawokeupstilldrunkandstillsingle.对她而言单身代表一个意义AndsingletoSamanthameantonething.可以给我一根烟吗？CanIhaveacigarette?没问题Sure.可以给我一个吻吗？CanIhaveakiss?佩萱丝去买♥♥果汁和松饼Patiencewentouttogetjuiceandmuffins.马上就回来She*llberightback.他下半身一♥丝♥不♥挂♥站在那里Therehewas,fullfrontal...friend.太好了Good!他就那样神情自若地站着Hejuststoodthere,casual,happy,hangingout.我不知所措Ididn'tknowwhattodo,whattosay.只觉得他异常兴奋Ionlyknewonething,that'swaytoomuchPeterbeforecoffee.•早安•早-Goodmorning.-Hey.我买♥♥了新鲜果汁和可口的松饼I'vegotsomefreshjuiceandthegoodmuffins.你怎么了？Sowhat'shappening?我在走廊上碰到彼得他没穿内♥裤♥Oh,well,um,IranintoPeterinthehallway,withouthisunderwearon.你真有眼光P.S.Congratulations.天气很好Sunnyday.甜心凯莉真的在走廊看到你的小♥弟♥弟♥吗？Honey,didCarrieseeyourdickinthehall?当时我正要去厕所Oh,yeah,shecaughtmeonthewaytothebathroom.正要去厕所Oh,onthewaytothebathroom.太好了有好吃的松饼Oh,yeah!Thegoodmuffins.我们今天有何安排？So,um,whatarewedoingtoday?最后我只带了一个松饼Ibarelyhadtimetoshovea"goodmuffin"inmypurse就匆匆启程回纽约beforeIwasonmywaybacktoNewYork.他到底居心何在？天啊…Oh,Jesus...我真的不该这么做或许会被人撞见Ireallyshouldn't,somebodymightsee.你何不到楼上来一下？一下就好Whydon'tyoucomeupstairs,justforaminute?莎曼珊？Samantha?别害怕小姐Don'tbescared,miss.是我汤米我正要离开It'sme,Tommy.Irmjustleaving.是你的朋友请我来的Yourfriendinvitedmeup.我知道不该这么做Iknowitwaswrong,但是离开家后我一直觉得很孤独…butI'vejustbeensolonelysinceIlefthomeand...我渴望得到女人的抚摸慰藉Iwantedthefeelofawoman'stouchonme.我要进洗手间I'mgoingintothebathroomnow出来时别让我再看到你andwhenIcomeoutyouwon'tbehere.这件事就当没发生过AndIneverwantthismentionedagain.我帮你开门小姐Letmegetthedoorforyou,miss.我原本希望你留下过夜Iwaskindofhopingyou'dstayover.听我说西恩Look,Sean,um...我认为我们不适合在一起Idon'tthinkthisisgonnawork.我们追求的是不同的生活Wewantdifferentthings.你想结婚…Youobviouslywanttogetmarried而我不知道自己要什么andIdon'tknowwhatIwant.你感觉得出我的心急迫切Youcouldsmellmydesperation,right?不只是…No,no,no.Itsjust...我在尝试与你相处懂吗？It's…Iwas,uh,tryingyouon,youknow?看看我们合不合适Toseeifitfit.结果合不来Itdoesn't.很抱歉I'msorry.我真搞不懂你们女人Idon'tunderstandyouwomen.我总听你们说“我想结婚”AllIhearis,"Iwanttogetmarried.Iwanttogetmarried."但却没有一个人答应我Andnoneofyousaysyes.到底是怎么回事？Whatthefuck?我再也受不了一个一个试了I'msotiredofgoingthroughwomen.我只是想结婚Ijustwanttogetmarried.我或许认识和你一拍即合的人Imayknowsomeonewho'sperfectforyou.是谁？Who?开始时他们很随性Theystartedoutcasual,只是吃个早午餐听场音乐会abrunchhere,aconcertthere.但很快他们就开始选购瓷器ButprettysoontheywerevisitingChina.正式场合我一直想用这种餐具Ialwayswantedthispatternforformaldining.真的吗？Areyouserious?夏洛特当场决定分手Charlottebrokeitoffthenandthere.他们绝不可能在一起Itwouldneverwork.他的风格是美式上流社会她则属于法式乡村HewasAmericanclassic,shewasFrenchcountry.为何你朋友从没打过电♥话♥?Yourfriendnevercalledlikeshepromised.Whyisthat?不知道Idon*tknow.在婚姻战争的枪林弹雨中AsIsiftedthroughtherubbleofmymarriageskirmish,我产生了一个想法Ihadathought.或许已婚与未婚者的冲突Maybethefightbetweenmarriedsandsingles就像北爱尔兰的战争一样islikethewarinNorthernIreland.基本上我们是一样的We'reallbasicallythesame；只是立场截然不同butsomehow,wewoundupondifferentsides.有另一半陪着走回家是很好Sure,it*dbegreattohavethatonespecialpersontowalkhomewith,但有时侯什么也比不过butsometimes,there*snothingbetter和单身女性朋友一同看电影享受夜晚时光thanmeetingyoursinglegirlfriendsforanightatthemovies.?YouknowIgotit??AllTmasking??Isforalittlerespectwhenyoucomehome??Justalittlebit??Hey,babyJustalittlebit??Whenyoucomehome??Justalittlebit??Mister??Justalittlebit??Iain'tgonnadoyouwrong??Whileyou'regone??Ain'tgonnadoyouwrong??*CauseIdon'twantto??AllTmasking?I'mconfused.Whywouldhedothat?他想勾引你吗？Didhewanttohavesexwithyou?不知道感觉不像这么回事Idon*tknow.Itdidn'tfeelsexual.可能他只是想献宝猴子也会这样Maybehejustwantedtoshowitoff,likeamonkey.他的尺寸如何？Sohowbigwasit?来点新鲜的胡椒吗?Freshpepper?好谢谢Yes,please.Thankyouverymuch.够了That*lldo.你要来点新鲜的胡椒吗？Wouldyoulikesomefreshpepper?宝贝我求之不得Oh,honey,Tdlovesomefreshpepper.其实我想这桌每个人都要加很多胡椒Infact,Ithinkeveryoneatthistablecouldusealotoffreshpepper.谢谢Thanks.所以我告诉她我不了解她的心情Mmm,soItoldherIdidn'tunderstandwhyshewassoupset.她说我无法理解它ShesaidIcouldn'tunderstandit,■我还是单身■怎么说？-fmsingle.-Andwhat?单身女郎处心积虑Singlewomenprowlbeachhouses一窥朋友"丈夫'的小♥弟♥弟♥吗hopingforglimpsesoftheirfriends1husbands*dicks?她和你的关系很好吗？Howgoodofafriendwasshe?这有什么差别？What'sthedifference?结了婚失去身价后Whensomeonegetsmarried,allbetsareoff.我们就成了她们的敌人Theybecomemarried,andwebecometheenemy.米兰达是律师事务所里唯一的单身贵族Astheonlysinglelawyerworkingatherlawfirm,她仔细思考过这个问题Mirandahadgiventhistopicsomethought.已婚女子都知道Youknow,marriedwomenarethreatened我们可能和任何人发♥生♥关♥系♥becausewecanhavesexanytime,anywhere,withanyone.是这样吗？Wecan?所以怕我们和她们丈夫有染Andthey'reafraidwe'regonnahaveitanytime,anywhere,withtheirhusbands.我绝不接受已婚的男人Iwouldneversleepwithamarriedman.你确定吗？Whatmakesyousosureyouhaven't?结婚戒指还是能拿下来Weddingringscomeoff,youknow.她们认为未婚者全都不可靠Faceit,ladies,ifyou'restillsingle,youarenottobetrusted.已婚女性并非全都这么想Comeon,notallmarriedwomenfeelthatway.夏洛特将婚姻视为妇女联谊会Charlottetreatedmarriagelikeasorority且迫不及待想加入shewasdesperatelyhopingtopledge.你说得没错You'reright,notall.但那些不担心的人会可怜你Theoneswhodon'tfearyou,pityyou.才没有这种事That'snottrue.你真的没见过那种Areyoutellingmeyouhaven'tgottenthose“单身真可|令"表情吗？"poorsingleyou"looks?我很讨厌那种表情Ihatethose.坦白说我见过Okay,yes,Ihave.若在派对中你是唯一单身的人Ihatewhenyou'retheonlysinglepersonatadinnerparty他们的表情就像在说你是…andtheyalllookatyoulikeyou'rea...-没人要？-异类-loser?-Leper.-荡♥妇♥■完全正确-Whore.-Exactly.已婚者真是我们的大敌I'mtellingyou,marriedpeoplearetheenemy!米兰达说对了吗？WasMirandaright?已婚与未婚者真的势不两立？Wereweenemies?两者之间正上演一场秘密的冷战吗？Isthereasecretcoldwarbetweenmarriedsandsingles?我很喜欢单身的女性朋友Ilovemysinglefriends,但因为我结婚了butnowthatI'mmarried,无法像从前时常见面Idon'tseethemasmuchasIusedto.我觉得非常痛苦It'stoopainful.她们让我想起从前绝望的日子TheyremindmeofhowdesperateIusedtobe.女性婚后会忘记自我Whenwomengetmarried,theyforgetwhotheyare.由“我”变成俄们”"I"becomes"we”.“我们喜欢这部电影""Welovedthemovie."“我们讨厌那间餐厅〃"Wehatethatrestaurant."我们…We,we,we,we,we.本来我和拍档什么事都一起做MybestbuddyandIdideverythingtogether.结果他却娶了一个和我合不来的女孩Thenhemarriedthisgirlwhodoesn*tlikeme.现在我只有在超级杯比赛时才见得到他NowIonlyseehimonSuperBowlSunday.这件事取决于自己想过何种生活It'sallaboutwhatyouwantoutoflife.有些人像我一样选择长大Somepeople,likeme,choosetogrowup,面对现实乖乖结婚facereality,andgetmarried.至于其他人…怎么说？Andotherschooseto,what?像长不大的孩子般过着空虚恼人的生活Liveanempty,hauntedlifeofstuntedadolescence.这不是一场冷战No,it'snotacoldwar.而是激烈的大战It'sanoutandoutbattle.而且参战者不只是一般人Anditisn'tjuststraightpeople.我认识的同性恋者都跑到夏威夷EverygayguyIknowisrunningofftoHawaii,穿长袖花衬衫宣誓结婚puttingonacaftan,recitingvows,心中想着我比不上他们andfeelingsuperiortome.穿长袖花衬衫Caftans?没错还戴兰花做的花环Oh,yes,withorchidleis.“欢迎〃Aloha.我怀念过去大家都还是单身的时光Imisstheoldtimeswheneveryonewasalone.我开始觉得…Now,I'mjuststartingtofeellike■自己像是被放逐…-凯莉？-I'manoutcastintheoutcasts.Carrie?天啊乔Oh,myGod!Joe!好多年没见了Jeez,it*sbeenyears.我一直没遇到你自从…Ihaven'tseenyousinceyouwere,um...还不是同性恋时？Straight?我是说‘西贡小姐〃演出后Well,IwasgonnasayinMissSaigon.我还在表演Oh.Stillam.我很喜欢这部音乐剧IloveMissSaigon.这位是我的朋友史丹佛Oh,thisis,um,thisismyfriend,Stanford.这是我的亲蜜爰人卢Hi.Andthisismylifepartner,Lou.看是结婚戒指Oh,wow.Lookatthat.恭喜你们Congratulations.-在哪里公♥证♥的？・巴尼百货-Whereareyouregistered?-Barney's.我只是在开玩笑Iwaskidding.你呢凯莉结婚了吗？SoCarrie,howaboutyou?Areyoumarried?也不算是…我的意思是还没有Oh,notreally.Imean,no!我们想的是同一件事吗？AreyouthinkingwhatI'mthinking?•好极了•什么事？-Perfect!-What?我们想要一个孩子Well,LouandIareinterestedinhavingachild.我们已经找到人代产了但还需要一颗健康的卵子Wealreadyhaveasurrogate,butweneedatop-notchegg.你愿意捐赠吗？Whatareyourfeelingsaboutdonatingone?这是我们的名片Well,listen,here*sourcard.考虑一下再联络我们Youthinkaboutitandgiveusacall.若你愿意我们会付钱-Wellpay.-