第三部分读后续写（技能篇）

【赢战高考】2022年高考“读后续写”全面练

第三部分：技能突破篇演讲人：01

技能分类突破02叙述故事常用的语义连接词汇：叙述故事常用的语义连接词汇二、读后续写常用修辞1．明喻：用一种事物比喻所要说明的另一事物，两者在本质上或性质上有相似之处。常用格式是“本体＋喻体”，常用like,as...as,asif或asthough引导。①Lifeisratherlikeopeningatinofsardines.We'realllookingfortheopener.人生就像开启一罐沙丁鱼，我们大家都在找起子。②Goodcoffeeislikefriendship:rich,warmandstrong.好的咖啡如同友谊：丰厚、温暖、热烈。叙述故事常用的语义连接词汇2．暗喻：对所比喻事物不直接点明而是用一个词来指代与该词所指事物有相似特点的另外一个事物。①Humoristheshockabsorberoflife;ithelpsustakeaction.幽默是生活的减震器，它可以鼓舞我们付诸行动。②Loveisalamp.Thedarkerthebackgroundis,thebrighteritlooks.爱是一盏灯。背景越暗，它看上去就越亮。3．拟人：赋予无生命事物、自然现象、抽象概念或动物及人的感情、行为、品质、态度等特征，以达到彼此交融、合二为一的效果。叙述故事常用的语义连接词汇①Thewindstoodupandgaveashout.大风凛冽，发出怒吼。②Theforesthelditsbreath,andthetreesseemedtolistenattentively.森林屏住了呼吸，树木似乎聚精会神地听着。4．类比：比较两事物在多方面的相似或不同之处，常用结构：AistoBwhatCistoD：A之于B犹如C之于D一样。①Shoesaretofeetwhattiresaretowheels.鞋子之于脚犹如轮胎之于车轮一样。叙述故事常用的语义连接词汇②Booksaretoourmindswhatfoodistoourbody.书籍之于我们的思想，犹如食物之于我们的身体。5．夸张：通过夸大程度达到强调句意、丰富感情色彩的目的。①Heworkedhisfingerstothebone.他拼命干活。②Iwasscaredtodeath.我吓得要死。6．引用：写文章时，引用现成语(如成语、诗句、格言、典故等)以表达自己的思想感情，说明自己对新问题、新道理的见解。它使论据确凿、充分，增强说服力，富有启发性，而且语言精炼，含蓄典雅。叙述故事常用的语义连接词汇①Whatimpressesmemostishisfamoussaying，“Geniusisonepercentinspirationandninety­ninepercentperspiration.”最让我印象深刻的是他的名言：“天才是百分之一的灵感加上百分之九十九的汗水。”②Since“lifeisastage”，weareactuallyactorsandactresses.因为“生活是一个舞台”，我们实际上都是男女演员。微技能1动作细节描写[技能点拨]动作细节描写就是对人物行为、动作的描写。好的动作描写可以使人物形象及动作栩栩如生、活灵活现，个性特征更加鲜明。人物动作的描写要遵循以下三个原则：1．使用动词要精准。对动作进行细致描写时一定要用准动作类词汇。用一系列小动作而不用大动作或者用含义比较明确的动词而不用抽象的动词来描述，都可以使描写更加具体生动。2．动词描述要体现过程。记叙文中有不少动作描写是一连串动作过程的展示。尤其在展示表现人物个性的动作时，如果我们蜻蜓点水、一笔带过，就很难突出刻画人物形象，也很难给阅卷老师留下深刻的印象，而动作细节描写能够充分展示出动作的过程，让故事情节生动活泼。微技能1动作细节描写3．适当运用修辞。在动作描述的过程中，在必要的地方可以恰当使用一些比喻，拟人与夸张等修辞手法，都能让动作描写变得更有表现力。[素材积累]与“跑、跳、行走”相关的动作①wanderintothewoods在树林里漫步②walkacrossstreet步行穿过马路③walkarminarm手挽手地走④walkthroughthepouringrain在倾盆大雨中行走⑤pacebackandforth来回踱步；徘徊⑥jumptoone'sfeet一跃而起⑦walkgracefully步态优雅地走⑧joginthewoods在林间慢跑⑨rushoutoftheroom冲出房间⑩crawltosafety爬到安全的地方2．与“看、听、说”相关的词汇①listenimpatiently不耐烦地听②glareangrilyatsb.怒目而视着某人③glancearound/roundtheroom扫视房间④stareat凝视⑤takealookat看一看⑥overhearafunnyconversation无意间听到一段好笑的谈话⑦remark评论说⑧add补充说3．其他与肢体语言相关的词汇①shrugone'sshoulders耸肩②frownatsb.对某人皱眉③bowtosb.向某人鞠躬④nodinagreement点头表示赞同⑤applaud鼓掌欢迎⑥patsb.ontheshoulder/head拍某人的肩膀/头⑦grasp/holdone'shand抓住某人的手⑧pointtosb.指着某人⑨waveone'shand挥手[解题流程][2016浙江10月高考改编]阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。OneweekendinJuly,Janeandherhusband,Tom,haddriventhreehourstocampovernightbyalakeintheforest.Unfortunately,onthewayanunpleasantsubjectcameupandtheystartedtoquarrel.Bythetimetheyreachedthelake,JanewassoangrythatshesaidtoTom,“I'mgoingtofindabetterspotforustocamp”

andwalkedaway.Withnopathtofollow,Janejustwalkedonforquitealongtime.Aftershehadclimbedtoahighplace,sheturnedaround,hopingtoseethelake.Tohersurprise,shesawnothingbutforestand,farbeyond,asnow­cappedmountaintop.Shesuddenlyrealizedthatshewaslost.“Tom!”shecried.“Help！”[解题流程]Noreply.IfonlyshehadnotlefthermobilephoneinthatbagwithTom.Janekeptmoving,butthefarthershewalked,themoreconfusedshebecame.Asnightwasbeginningtofall,Janewassotiredthatshehadtostopforthenight.Lyingawakeinthedark,JanewantedverymuchtobewithTomandherfamily.Shewantedtoholdhimandtellhimhowmuchshelovedhim.[解题流程]Janeroseatthebreakofday,hungryandthirsty.Shecouldhearwatertrickling(滴落)somewhereatadistance.Quicklyshefollowedthesoundtoastream.Tohergreatjoy,shealsosawsomeberrybushes.Shedrankandateafewberries.Neverinherlifehadshetastedanythingbetter.Feelingstrongernow,Janebegantowalkalongthestreamandhopeitwouldleadhertothelake.[解题流程]Asshepickedherwaycarefullyalongthestream,Janeheardahelicopter.Isthatforme?Unfortunately,thetreesmadeitimpossibleforpeopletoseeherfromabove.Afewminuteslater,anotherhelicopterflewoverhead.Janetookoffheryellowblouse,thinkingthatsheshouldgotoanopenareaandflagthemiftheycamebackagain.[解题流程]Butnomorehelicopterscameanditwasgettingdarkagain.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ItwasdaybreakwhenJanewokeup.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________[解题流程]第一步：初读，获取基本信息1．故事主线：驱车野营生嫌隙，迷失山林心焚急；挨饿恐惧度长夜，两架飞机丧良机。2．故事要素：(1)When:oneweekendinJuly(2)Who:Jane(Wife);Tom(Husband)(3)Where:intheforest(4)Why：Thecouplehadaquarrel.(5)What：Janewaslost.3．故事情节(故事情节线/人物情感线)[解题流程](1)已知线索：湖边野营→夫妻吵架→负气出走→迷失森林→失联→自救→想念亲人→挣扎寻路→发现直升机→飞离(2)根据故事情节选择填空情感线索：angry→frightened→regretful→joyful→hopeful第二步：再读，获取发展线索，构思情节发展1．细读续写两段开头语，理顺续写各段落之间的逻辑关系(根据所给段落首句，创设3－5个发问题目)Paragraph1:Butnomorehelicopterscameanditwasgettingdarkagain.[解题流程](1)HowdidJanefeelthen?(2)HowdidJanestrugglethroughthenight?(3)Didshefallasleep?Paragraph2:ItwasdaybreakwhenJanewokeup.(1)WasJanerescued?(2)WhorescuedJane?(3)Howwassherescued?(4)Howdidshefeelthen?[解题流程]2．预测续写故事情节Paragraph1：本段预测主线：饥饿劳累懊悔知，养精蓄锐等良机；夜卧山林心恐惧，夜色沉寂又睡去。→Jane后悔和Tom吵架，相信他一定会报警营救她。她必须积攒力气以便明天给直升机(helicopter)发信号，夜幕躺在小溪(stream)边，野兽声令她恐惧，后来在夜幕中睡着了。Paragraph2：本段预测主线：醒看渔民在远处，带她爬到开阔地；欣喜飞机见衬衣，夫妻相拥又相知。[解题流程]→Jane第二天醒来突然发现远处有个渔民(atadistance)，渔民带她爬到(climb)一个开阔的没有树遮挡的地方，令她欣喜的是(Tohergreatjoy)，就在那时，一架直升机飞过头顶。渔民帮她挥舞着黄色的衬衣(yellowblouse)，她得救了。第三步：优化写作语言，完成读后续写Paragraph1：Butnomorehelicopterscameanditwasgettingdarkagain.________________________________________________________________________[解题流程]________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Paragraph2：ItwasdaybreakwhenJanewokeup.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________[解题流程][参考答案]Paragraph1：But

no

more

helicopters

came

and

it

was

getting

dark

again.Janewassotired,hungry,andextremelyfrightened.Shethoughttoherself,“IfonlyIhadnotquarreledwithTom.WhereisTom?Hemusthavemadetheemergencycall.WhatIneedisenoughcourage.IfIcontinuemyspiritstomorrow,Iwillbelikelytoguidethehelicopter.”Lyingbesidethestream,shefellasleepverysoon.Suddenly,sheheardtheshoutsoftigers,whichmadeherscaredtodeath.Aftersheheldherbreathforafewminutes,everythingwasquietagain.Intheterribledarkness,shesleptagain.[参考答案]Paragraph2：It

was

daybreak

when

Jane

woke

up.Shecaughtsightofafishermanatadistance,withwhosehelpsheclimbedtoanopenarea.Tohergreatjoy,ahelicopterflewoverheadjustatthatmoment.Thefishermanhelpedflagheryellowblousewildly.Thisdidcatchtherescuers'attention!Janewasrescued.SeeingTom,shetoldhimhowmuchshemissedhim.Neverwouldtheybeawayfromeachother.Tomgaveherthewarmestandlongesthugshehadeverreceived.Peoplearoundsmiledwithsatisfaction.[技能点拨]1．心理活动描写是指在文章中，对人物在一定的环境中的心理状态、精神面貌和内心活动进行的描写。它是塑造人物形象、刻画人物性格品质的一种方法。最常用的是描写人物的内心独白，写出人物的所思所想，让人物直接吐露自己的心声，说出他的欢乐和悲伤、矛盾和愁郁、忧虑和希望，心理描写能够直接深入人物心灵，揭示人物的内心世界，同时也能够突出文章的中心或表明人物的品质或情感。心理活动描写要遵循以下三个原则：微技能2心理活动描写和对话语言描写(1)加上修饰语，落实“细微处”。描写人物心理活动时，一定要突出细节，所有的感情都体现在“细微处”，尽量不用过于笼统的词，而用相关的细节性词汇或词组，例如：smiledhappily,shiningsmileonherface等。(2)体现“多样性”，避免描写“单一化”。在进行人物心理描写时，尽量避免平铺直叙的表达，可以采用多种句式、非谓语动词等形式来体现语法结构的多样性。(3)适当使用比喻修辞方法，让表达生动而优美。2．与心理活动描写不同，对话语言描写能在一定程度上让人物把自己的心理活动说出来。对话可以是两个人的对话，也可以是几个人的相互交谈。描写人物的语言，不但要求做到个性化，而且还要体现出人物说话的艺术性。成功的语言描写总是鲜明地展示人物的性格，生动地表现人物的思想感情，深刻地反映人物的内心世界。读后续写中对话语言描写要遵循以下三个原则：微技能2心理活动描写和对话语言描写(1)控制对话的比重。读后续写中的对话描写要注意在文中段落中的比重问题，切忌全以对话或大部分对话代替其他细节描写。(2)对话内容应符合人物身份特征，否则写作效果会打折扣。(3)续写中所写对话应该紧扣一个中心或话题，且这个中心或者话题需要与全文的主题一致，这样才能使文章思路清晰，才能使对话显得有意义，否则将会影响文意的表达和故事情节的发展。[素材积累]1．心理活动描写①bekeenon...对……热心；渴望②dance/jumpforjoy高兴地跳起来微技能2心理活动描写和对话语言描写③anencouragedexpression受到鼓舞的表情④incheerfulspirits心情愉快⑤asatisfiedlook满意的表情⑥bedelightedat...对……很高兴⑦brightensb.'sheart使某人心情愉快⑧feelinspired/encouraged受到鼓舞⑨beinhighspirits精神高涨⑩astrongsenseofloss强烈的失落感⑪withaheavyheart怀着沉重的心情⑫cryone'sheartout悲痛欲绝微技能2心理活动描写和对话语言描写⑬withasinkingheart带着沮丧的心情⑭haveaworriedlook愁眉苦脸⑮feelembarrassed/annoyed/discouraged感到尴尬的/恼怒的/泄气的2．对话语言描写①say...loudly/proudly/gently/angrily/seriously/cheerfully...大声地/自豪地/温柔地/生气地/严肃地/高兴地说……②addthat…补充说……③answersb./makeananswertosb.回答某人微技能2心理活动描写和对话语言描写④tellsb.sth./tellsth.tosb.告诉某人某事⑤remindsb.that...提醒某人……⑥explainsth.clearly清楚地解释某事⑦announce/declarethat...宣布……⑧yellout/cryouttosb.大声朝某人喊叫⑨whispertosb.gently对某人温声细语⑩complainabout...抱怨……⑪objectto/raiseanobjectionto反对……⑫disagreewith/haveadisagreementwith不同意……⑬arguewithsb.oversth.与某人争论某事微技能2心理活动描写和对话语言描写[解题流程][2018浙江6月高考改编]阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。Itwassummer,andmydadwantedtotreatmetoavacationlikeneverbefore.HedecidedtotakemeonatriptotheWildWest.[解题流程]WetookaplanetoAlbuquerque,abigcityinthestateofNewMexico.WereachedAlbuquerqueinthelateafternoon.UnclePaul,mydad'sfriend,pickedusupfromtheairportanddroveusuptohisfarminPecos.HiswifeTinacookedusadeliciousdinnerandwegottoknowhissonsRyanandKyle.MydadandIspentthenightintheguestroomofthefarmhouselisteningtothefrogsandwaterrollingdowntherivernearby.Veryearlyinthemorning,[解题流程]

UnclePaulwokeusuptohavebreakfast.“Thedaystartsatdawnonmyfarm，”hesaid.Afterbreakfast,IwenttohelpAuntTinafeedthechickens,whilemydadwentwithUnclePaultotakethesheepouttograze(吃草).IwasimpressedtoseemydadandUnclePaulridinghorses.Theylookedreallycool.[解题流程]Intheafternoon,IaskedUnclePaulifIcouldtakeahorseride,andhesaidyes,aslongasmydadwentwithme.Iwasn'tgoingtotakeahorseridebymyselfanyway.So,mydadandIputonournewcowboyhats,gotonourhorses,andheadedslowlytowardsthemountains.“Don'tbelateforsupper，”UnclePaulcried,“andkeeptothetracksothatyoudon'tgetlost！”“OK！[解题流程]”mydadcriedback.AfterawhileUnclePaulandhisfarmhousewereoutofsight.Itwassopeacefulandquietandthecolorsofthebrownrocks,thedeepgreenpinetrees,andthelateafternoonsunmixedtocreateamagicscene.Itlookedlikeabeautifulwoven(编织的)blanketspreadoutuponthegroundjustforus.Paragraph1：[解题流程]Suddenlyalittlerabbitjumpedoutinfrontofmyhorse.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Paragraph2：Wehadnoideawherewewereanditgotdark.________________________________________________________________________[解题流程]________________________________________________________________________第一步：初读，获取基本信息1．故事主线：父亲带我去农场，夜宿农舍清晨忙；叔叔同意“我”骑马，父伴子骑赏风光。2．故事要素：(1)When:summervacation(2)Where:onafarmintheWildWest(3)Who:dad,UnclePaul,I[解题流程](4)Why:Tobecool,Iwantedtotakeahorseride.(5)What:MydadandIwasridingthehorsestowardsthemountainswhenalittlerabbitjumpedout.3．故事情节(故事情节线/人物情感线)已知线索：出游西部，心情愉悦→到达农场，好奇不已→喂鸡养羊，体验生活→骑马诱惑，跃跃欲试→与父同行，策马飞奔→突现兔子，不知所措→迷路险情，如何回家→……[解题流程]第二步：再读，获取发展线索，构思情节发展1．细读续写两段开头语，确定续写各段落间的逻辑关系及结局①第一段所给首句Suddenlyalittlerabbitjumpedoutinfrontofmyhorse.是故事发展的转折点。由此可描述兔子的出现使马受惊后的情景，注意人物心理活动的描写，并兼顾动作描写。②第二段首句Wehadnoideawherewewereanditgotdark.呼应原文UnclePaul的叮嘱——Don'tbelateforsupper，续写可从迷路后如何寻路返回农场着手。[解题流程]2．预测续写故事情节Paragraph1：本段预测主线：小兔突现马受惊，惊恐万分父紧追。马停已经天色晚，忽然发现迷方向。根据原文可勾勒出续写部分第一段的以下细节：马受惊奔跑→“我”惊恐万分→父亲大喊“抓紧绳子”并紧追不舍→马最终停下→“我”如释重负，却发现迷失了方向。Paragraph2：本段预测主线：迷路求救无人应，虽然担心但镇静。平静之中急生智，策马返回沿河旁。根据原文可勾勒出续写部分第二段的细节：迷路后“我”和父亲虽然担心但镇静下来想办法回到UnclePaul的农场→“我”想到沿着河返回农舍→不久看见了远处的农舍。[解题流程]第三步：优化写作语言，完成读后续写Paragraph1：Suddenlyalittlerabbitjumpedoutinfrontofmyhorse.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________[解题流程]________________________________________________________________________Paragraph2：Wehadnoideawherewewereanditgotdark.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________[解题流程][参考答案]Paragraph1：Suddenly

a

little

rabbit

jumped

out

in

front

of

my

horse.Thisunexpectedappearancefrightenedmyhorse,whichmadeitrunwildly.“Don'tletgotherope！”yelleddad.FrightenedasIwas,Itriedtokeepmybalancetopreventmefromfallingoff.Mydadwaschasingafterme.Fortunately,minuteslater,thehorsestopped,outofbreath,andsodidI.SeeingIwasOK,Dadwasquiterelieved.However,wewereoffthetrackandweknewthatwemaygetlost.[参考答案]Paragraph2：We

had

no

idea

where

we

were

and

it

got

dark.Exhaustedandhungry,IwonderifwecouldfindourwaybacktoUnclePaul's.Ikeptshoutingforhelp,hopingmyshoutscouldbeheardbysomeone,buttherewasnoreply.Dadsoundedalittleworriedbutheremindedmetocalmdown.Itwasthenthatmymindraced,“Dad,listen,therushingriverwater！”Ishoutedexcitedly.“Wecanreturntothefarmhousedowntheriver.”Wemadeourwayandbeforelongwecaughtsightofthelightsinthedistance.Wedelightedlyknewweweresafe.Whatathrillingvacationlikeneverbeforewehad![技能点拨]进行人物外貌性格描写时，可描写一个人的总体印象，也可以抓住人物重要的外貌特征或性格特点进行描述。可以具体描述人物的五官、着装，甚至可以配上动作描述。在描写人物片段时，可写你对人物印象最深的一两点，再加上一两句人物评价。读后续写中可以从以下两方面描写人物外貌特征。微技能3外貌性格描写：1．肖像描写。肖像描写即描绘人物的面貌特征，它包括人物的身材、容貌、服饰、打扮以及表情、仪态、风度、习惯性特点等。肖像描写是对人物外貌的一种静态描写，其目的是以“形”传“神”，刻画人物的性格特征，反映人物的内心世界。2．神态描写。神态描写专指对面部五官展开描写，可以表现人物的喜怒哀乐。描写时要用表示表情、神态的词语。常通过人物的脸、眼睛等方面的神态描写来反映人物的喜怒哀乐等情感。[素材积累]1．外貌描写①scruffilydressed衣着不整洁的②neatlydressed衣着干净整洁的微技能3外貌性格描写：③well­dressed衣着考究的④smartlydressed穿着光鲜的⑤elegantlydressed穿着考究的⑥plain相貌平平的⑦good­looking好看的⑧muscular强壮的⑨short个子矮的⑩tall高的⑪overweight超重的⑫plump丰满的微技能3外貌性格描写：⑬thin瘦的⑭skinny极瘦的⑮slim苗条的⑯mediumheight中等身高⑰tubby矮胖的2．性格与特征描写①simple­minded头脑简单的②polite有礼貌的③modest谦虚的④knowledgeable有丰富知识的微技能3外貌性格描写：⑤imaginative富有想象力的⑥ill­mannered举止粗鲁的⑦hard­working努力工作的⑧impatient急躁的，不耐烦的⑨sweet和蔼的⑩brave勇敢的⑪careful仔细的⑫careless粗心的⑬good­hearted好心肠的⑭responsible有责任心的微技能3外貌性格描写：⑮diligent勤奋的⑯experienced有经验的⑰forgetful健忘的⑱cold冷酷的⑲calm镇定的⑳strong坚强的eq\o(○,\s\up1(21))selfish自私的eq\o(○,\s\up1(22))romantic浪漫的eq\o(○,\s\up1(23))quiet安静的eq\o(○,\s\up1(24))nervous焦虑的微技能3外貌性格描写：eq\o(○,\s\up1(25))lovely可爱的eq\o(○,\s\up1(26))gentle温柔的eq\o(○,\s\up1(27))generous大方的eq\o(○,\s\up1(28))adventurous喜欢冒险的eq\o(○,\s\up1(29))energetic精力旺盛的eq\o(○,\s\up1(30))charming有吸引力的eq\o(○,\s\up1(31))confident自信的eq\o(○,\s\up1(32))humorous幽默的eq\o(○,\s\up1(33))optimistic乐观的eq\o(○,\s\up1(34))outstanding杰出的微技能3外貌性格描写：eq\o(○,\s\up1(35))pessimistic悲观的eq\o(○,\s\up1(36))pleasant令人愉快的eq\o(○,\s\up1(37))proud骄傲的；自豪的eq\o(○,\s\up1(38))rude无礼的；粗鲁的eq\o(○,\s\up1(39))sociable善于交际的eq\o(○,\s\up1(40))spirited精神饱满的微技能3外貌性格描写：[解题流程][2017浙江11月高考改编]阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。AVacationwithMyMotherIhadaninterestingchildhood.Itwasfilledwithsurprisesandamusements,allbecauseofmymother—loving,sweet,yetabsent­mindedandforgetful.OnestrangefamilytripwetookwhenIwaseleventellsalotabouther.MytwosetsofgrandparentslivedinColoradoandNorthDakota,[解题流程]

andmyparentsdecidedtospendafewweeksdrivingtothosestatesandseeingallthesightsalongtheway.Asthefirstdayofourtripapproached,David,myeight­year­oldbrother,andIunwillinglysaidgood­byetoallofourfriends.Whoknewifwe'deverseethemagain?Finally,themomentofourdeparturearrived,andweloadedsuitcases,books,games,[解题流程]

campingequipment,andatentintothecarandbravelydroveoff.Webravelydroveoffagaintwohourslaterafterwe'dreturnedhometogetthepurseandtraveler'schecksMomhadforgotten.DavidandIwerealwaysalittlenervouswhenusinggasstationbathroomsifMomwasdrivingwhileDadslept：“Youstandoutsidethedoorandplaylookout(放哨)whileIgo,[解题流程]

andI'llstandoutsidethedoorandplaylookoutwhileyougo.”Ihadterriblepicturesinmymind:“Honey,wherearethekids？”“What？！Oh,Gosh...Ithoughttheywerebeingawfullyquiet.”Wewereneveractuallyleftbehindinastrangecity,butweweren'tabouttotakeanychances.[解题流程]Onthefourthorfifthnight,wehadtroublefindingahotelwithavacancy.Afterdrivinginvainforsometime,Momsuddenlygotagreatidea:Whydidn'twefindahousewithalikely­lookingbackyardandaskifwecouldsetuptentthere?DavidandIbecamenervous.Toourgreatrelief,Dadturneddowntheidea.Momnevercouldunderstandourobjections(反对).Ifastrangefamilyshoweduponherfrontdoorstep,[解题流程]

Momwouldhavebeendelighted.Shethinkseveryoneintheworldisasniceassheis.Wefinallyfoundavacancyinthenexttown.Paragraph1：Thenextdaywerememberedthebrand­newtentwehadbroughtwithus.________________________________________________________________________[解题流程]________________________________________________________________________Paragraph2：Wedrovethroughseveralstatesandsawlotsofgreatsightsalongtheway.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________[解题流程]第一步：初读，获取基本信息1．故事主线：驱车出游访二老，妈妈健忘返家跑；担心自己被遗失，宾馆难找主意妙。2．故事要素：(1)When:Iwaseleven(2)Where:duringatrip(3)Who:Mum,Dad,David,I(4)Why:Mymotherwasforgetful.(5)What:afamilytripwithmyforgetful,loving,sweetmother[解题流程]3．故事情节(故事情节线/人物情感线)已知线索：驱车出发→返回拿物→再出发→妈妈健忘令我担心→有空房间的宾馆难寻→妈妈建议找陌生人的后院搭帐篷→David和我担忧，爸爸拒绝第二步：再读，获取发展线索，构思情节发展1．细读续写两段开头语，确定续写的大体方向①根据续写第一段首句中写到的关键词we_remembered_the_brand­new_tent，可知下文应着重围绕帐篷展开话题。可按照妈妈健忘、善良的性格特点，预测可能会发生的一些有趣的故事。[解题流程]②根据续写第二段首句中的关键词along_the_way提示，第二段可描述一路观光的同时，在他们家人之间发生的美好而有趣的故事，最后还可以写看望祖父母，并写出“我”对这次旅行的感悟。结合首句中关键词greatsights可简单描写景物作为呼应。2．预测续写故事情节Paragraph1：本段预测主线：夜晚露宿在河边，怎料帐篷落宾馆。→第二天我们决定沿河露营，以便欣赏自然美景。爸爸正要搭帐篷，这时突然发现找不到帐篷了，询问妈妈后得知妈妈又把帐篷落在宾馆了。他只好返回宾馆拿帐篷。Paragraph2：本段预测主线：沿途观光好快乐，母爱亲情大如天。→沿途每到一处，妈妈都很高兴，拥抱我们，使我们感到舒适安全。尽管妈妈健忘和心不在焉，但她从来不忘记表达对我们的爱。[解题流程]第三步：优化写作语言，完成读后续写Paragraph1：Thenextdaywerememberedthebrand­newtentwehadbroughtwithus.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________[解题流程]________________________________________________________________________Paragraph2：Wedrovethroughseveralstatesandsawlotsofgreatsightsalongtheway.____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________[解题流程]Paragraph1：The

next

day

we

remembered

the

brand­new

tent

we

had

brought

with

us.Wedecidedtocampalongtheriver.Theviewsthereweresurprisinglybeautiful—thewarmsunshine,thefreshairandthecleanwater.Wesatonthegrass,enjoyingthesplendidnature.However,whenDadwasabouttoputupourtent,hecouldn'tfindit.ThenheaskedMomwherethetentwas.AgainMomhadleftitinthehotel.Well,Dadhadtogobacktogetittocontinueourcamping.[参考答案][参考答案]Paragraph2：We

drove

through

several

states

and

saw

lots

of

great

sights

along

the

way.Everytimewegottoanewplace,Momwouldcheeruplikeachild,laughinganddancingaround.Whenwecamebacktothehotelafterthetiringbutexcellentvisit,Momwouldhugus,kissusonourfaces.Wealwaysfeltcomfortableandsafe.Absent­mindedandforgetfulasshewas,sheneverforgottoexpressherlovetous.Finallywemetourtwosetsofgrandparentsandenjoyedfamilyhappiness.Thistripmademeexperiencedmymother'sloveandfamilylove.[技能点拨]环境描写是指对人物所处的具体的社会环境和自然环境的描写。其中社会环境是指能反映社会、时代特征的建筑、场所、陈设等景物以及民俗民风等。自然环境是指自然界的景物，如季节变化、风霜雨雪、山川湖泊等。环境描写往往是叙述、描写、抒情等表达方法的综合运用，是自然景色、社会环境、人物活动等描写对象的集中表现。1．描写自然环境的方法自然环境描写时要做到有声有色、有味道、有质感、有动态、有画面感。可以借助描写天气、描写自然景物、描述自然环境来衬托故事中人物的心境或情绪。微技能4环境描写(1)选择与主题和情节设置一致的环境要素，以营造故事发生的特定环境。(2)细致深入。为了达到从侧面衬托人物的心境或情绪，所选的景物应进行细致深入的描写。(3)添加附加信息。如天气变化、周边的景物、昏暗的路灯、摇曳的树影等。(4)环境细节描写一定要与动作和心理活动等相结合，才能更好地发挥环境细节描写的作用。3．充分利用环境描写可以起到烘托故事高潮的作用为了使故事达到最紧张、最扣人心弦的时刻，即高潮部分，常可以通过加大笔墨描写环境以达到目的。强化环境描写增强了高潮元素，能够使我们感受到紧张气氛的倍增。微技能4环境描写例1：Immediately,anabsolutedarknessruledtheforest.(黑暗)Evenworse,thetemperaturesuddenlydroppeddramatically.(寒冷)例2：Itdidn'ttakelongfortheforesttobeenvelopedindarkness(黑暗).Herraspingbreathsteamed(寒冷)inthemoonlightandherthroatwasparchedfromthirst.-微技能4环境描写环境描写的技巧例3：Iclosedmyeyestoenjoythegentlebreezeandthesoundsoftheclashingwaves.Gentlyopeningmyeyes,Isawmyparentstakingarelaxingstrollalongthebeach.(视觉＋环境描写)例4：Ilookedoutofthecarwindow,windingrivers,loftymountains,sunnybeachesanddeepvalleysholdingmeentirelyintheirfascination.(视觉＋环境描写＋拟人)03[素材积累][素材积累]1．天气描写①warm温暖的②hot热的③rainy多雨的④cloudy多云的⑤snowy下雪多的⑥foggy有雾的⑦damp潮湿的⑧cold寒冷的⑨clear晴朗的[素材积累]⑩changeable变化无常的⑪stormy有暴风雨的⑫terrible可怕的⑬wet有雨的；潮湿的⑭windy风大的；多风的⑮awful糟糕的⑯frosty霜冻的⑰sunny阳光灿烂的⑱pleasant晴朗的⑲mild温和的[素材积累]2．场景描写①stony多石的②rocky岩石覆盖的③roaring咆哮的④narrow狭窄的⑤impressive给人深刻印象的⑥grassy长满青草的⑦golden金色的⑧frozen冰冻的⑨flat平坦的[素材积累]⑩dry干燥的⑪attractive吸引人的⑫cross­country横跨全国的⑬enjoyable令人愉快的⑭exciting激动人心的⑮memorable难忘的⑯lovely美好的⑰historic古老的⑱mountainous多山的⑲remote遥远的[素材积累]⑳romantic浪漫的eq\o(○,\s\up1(21))wild荒凉的eq\o(○,\s\up1(22))wonderful美妙的04[解题流程][解题流程]阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。Lastweek,Iwentbacktomyhometown,whichusedtobeabeautifulplace,withgreentreesalloverthemountainsandasmallriverwindingthroughthewholecountrysideinmind.Icouldn'twaittoseemyhometown,whichIhadalwaysbeendreamingof.Themountains,thetrees,theriverandthepeopletherehavealwaysbeeninmymindtheseyears.[解题流程]WhileIwasonthewaytomyhometown,Ilookedoutofthebuswindowtoenjoythebeautifulsceneryatthesametime.Myhometowncamenearerandnearer.However,Icouldn'tbelievesomethingstrangecameintomyeyes:allthetreesalongtheroadweregoneandlotsofsandwasblowinginthewind!IwonderedifIhadtakenawrongbus.Infact,Ihadn't.[解题流程]Thebusfinallyarrived.Iquicklygotoff,lookingaroundtheplaceIusedtolivein.Everythinghadchanged！Treesweregone,leavingthebaremountainsandadryriver.Seeingthis,Icouldn'thelpburstingintotears.Irushedontoamountain,tryingtofindasingletreethere,butIfailed.Therewasnothingbutsand.Istoodstill,lostinthought.Intherestofthatday,[解题流程]

Icouldhardlytalk.Iwasjustwonderingwhypeoplecutdownallthetreesandtheriverdriedup.ItwasnotuntilthenextdaythatIhadachancetotalkwithmygrandfather,whohadlivedthereforovereightyyears.Iexpressedmypuzzlementtohimdirectly.“Well，[解题流程]”hesaidinasadvoice,“nobodyherewantstocutdowntreesandmaketheriverdryup,ifpossible.Butallofushavenochoice！”Mygrandfathercontinued,gettingalittleexcited.“Asthepopulationgrowslargerandlarger,peopleneededmorefoodtofeedthemselves.Theyhadtocutdownthetreestomakeroomforgrowingricetomakealiving.Besides,peoplehadtochannelwaterintothefields.Daybyday,treesweregoneandtheriverdriedup.”[解题流程]Paragraph1：AfterIcamebackfrommyhometown,ittookmealongtimetocalmdown.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Paragraph2：Nowadays,scienceandtechnologyisdevelopingrapidly.[解题流程]________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________第一