英语搞笑短剧剧本

英语搞笑短剧剧本英语搞笑短剧剧本英语搞笑短剧剧本xxx公司英语搞笑短剧剧本文件编号：文件日期：修订次数：第1.0次更改批准审核制定方案设计，管理制度三打白骨精ThreeTimes’BeatingMonster人物：T唐僧S：孙悟空E：猪八戒J：沙僧B：白骨精（何平）B1：B变成的村姑B2：B变成的太婆B3：B变化成的老头T:Emitofo,doyouknowwherewearenow?

S:Bajie,map!E:(摸出，递给S)S:Look,boss(凑近T)………（T、S一齐转向E）T:Bajie!HowManytimesIhavetoldyou,don’tbringthesepicturesofbeautifulgirls!E:Oh,boss!Forgiveme(伸手拿回)T:(缩手)I’llkeepitforyouuntilwereachthewestE:But……T:Emitofo,nothingislust,lustisnothing!Map?E:(递)Here.Em……wehavearrivedinWhiteTigerS:FatPig!E:Monkey,ifyoudaretosaythesetwowordsonceagain,Iwill,Iwill……….S:Youwillwhat(凶相)

E:(软禁)Iwillhelpyoucatchfleas(跳蚤).S:Hm!T:（轻咳）Wukong,factually,IamabithungryCouldyougotogetmesomefood?

E:Yousee,bossishungry,too!T:Baijie!Don’tforgetwhoatemylastmeal!J:Butboss,ifamonstercomeswhilebrothermonkeyisaway…..T:Em…….Itisaproblem.Wukong,doyouhaveanyidea?S:Noproblem!(安装)（B已躲在一旁偷看）J:Thisis…..

S:Electricnet!Ihavelearnttheenergyofelectricityfromboss’sbooks.SoImadethis.Nomonstercanapproachyouifyoustayinit!T:Em……Wukong,youarebecomingmoreandmorescientific!Emitofo,knowledgeispower!S:Bye!(走)T:Let’splaycards!(三人开始打牌)音乐《斗地主》B:Hm!Hm!Electricnet?Youaretoochildish.(变成B1)B1:(接近三人，望着)CanIjoinyou?J:I’msorry,lady.WeareplayingFightingAgainstlandownerandthreepeopleareenough.B1:(在一旁观看)Oh,Chance!Bomb!T:Bomb(打出)B1:DoubleKing!T:Oh….Iwin!Em……,Lady,youareaboss-hand.Comeinandteachme!(准备开电网门)S:(回来，看见B1)Oh,monster!(上前就打)B1:（倒)Ah……T:(气愤)Wukong!Lookwhathavedone!Sheismyteacher!S:Sheisamonster!T:Nonsense!(深呼吸)S:Oh,pleasedon’t……T:It’stoolate!(唱)Oncemore……youopenthedoor…(泰坦尼克主题曲，走音离谱)S:Please,Please,oh,no……(痛苦抱头)T:(呛住，咳)Wukong,I’mdisappointedwithyou!B:(真身出现)Hm!SunWukong,I’llteachyoualesson!(变成太婆)B2:Hello,haveyouseenmydaughter?T:Daughter...(连忙挡住地尸体)No,sorry!(陪笑，B2想看后面是什么，T挡)S:（咬牙切齿）Youmonster,I’llbeatyouintohell!(S追打B2,B2躲至T身后，S打，不想打到T头，T晕，S再打死B2)E&J:AreyouOk,boss(扶T)

J:Look,(伸食指)howmany?T:Two…..(晕乎乎地)SunWukong,gameover!(变成B3)B3:(看到B1,B2尸体)Oh….,mydaughter,mywife!Whodidit!!(哭喊)S:I’llkillyou,monster!(打)T:（想阻止，未及）You,you.....(险些晕，E,J扶住)Youhavekilledthreelives!S:No,theyarenothumanbeings!Theyarecreatedbymonster!T:Monster?Youarearealmonster!Neverletmeseeyou,go!!S:(悲，离去)（音乐，营造“假”悲伤气氛）《人鬼情未了》J:boss,brotherMonkeyis.......T:Don'tmentionthatguyanymore!B:(出现)Ha,ha,ha!(三尸体B1,B2,B3在B招手后“飘”走)T:（惊）Youare......B:Howfoolishyouare,MrTang!(E,J去阻斗，被击退)B:(抓住T)I'llenjoyyourmeatandblood,ha,ha......S:(悄悄走到B后，打B,B晕)Athousandyearslater.T:Wukong?E:Oh,BrotherMonkey!J:Ourheroisback!T:I,Ican'tunderstand......Whathappened?S:Boss,yourIQneedsincreasing!Thismonsterchangeditsappearanceintothreeshapesinordertocheatyou!T:How,howdidyoufindout?S:(沉默).......Monkey'sintuition(直觉)T: