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Commentsoncontinuationwriting
agoodContinuationwritingStorytheme(主题)plot(情节)feelingpositiveendingvividdescriptionlinkwords对第五档(21-25)作文的描述:与所给短文融洽度高,与所提供各段落、开头语衔接合理。所使用语法结构和词汇丰富、准确,可能有些许错误,但完全不影响意义表达;有效地使用了语句间的连接成分,使所续写短文结构紧凑;评分标准scoringcriterion读后续写考查什么?•把握关键信息和语言特点的能力•语言运用的准确性和丰富性•对语篇结构连贯的把控能力•创造新思维能力correctrichlogicalLearningaims:
Bytheendoftheclass,wewillbeableto1.Learnhowtocreatealogical(逻辑的)endingbasedonthetheme.2.Learntopolish(润色)yourwritingbyusingvivid(生动的)description
andproperlinkwords.Process:
MrsMeredith,offeredhelptothepoorfamilies,aboycaughthereye.Beginning:economicdepression(萧条),struggletomakeendsmeet(收支相抵.Clamax:SheaskedherchildrentoassisttheboyEnding:
How?AgoodideahitJohnWhat'sthestoryabout?Self-evaluation:Para.1:WhenMrs.MeredithheardofJohn'sidea,shethoughtitwasagoodone,too.
□1.Whatdidshesaythen?□
2.Whatdidthechildrendo?(prepare/buy/make)□
3.Shouldwemention(提及)Bernardinpara1?Para.2:Witheverythingready.Bernardstartedoutonhisnewbusiness.
□4.HowdidBernardgotosellthepopcorn?□5.Didtheymeetsomedifficulties?□6.Whathappenednext?□7.Howdidtheyfeel?□8.Didyoushowyourthemeintheend?
逻辑混乱,前后不连贯没有人物情感变化体现与所提供开头语衔接不够用词不准确,不丰富没体现主题Keytopolishingyourcontinuationwriting
1.Usespecific(具体的)actionverbs
2.Usevivid(生动的)
description
3.Useadvancedsentencepatterns
Usespecificactionverbsyell(吼叫),shout,chat,talk,scream(尖叫),cry,state,announce(布),advise,mention(提及),add,agree,whisper(低声说),sigh(叹气),reply,respond
Face:
burstintotears/laughter,wearasmile,laughheartilyBody:tremble,,shake,jump,frown(皱眉)
sprangtoone’sfeet.,beexcitedlyheadingintoFeeling:伤心失望:hopeless,disappointed,embarrassed(尴尬的),beclosetotearsHelowered/benthisheadinshame,beingeagertofindaholetohidehimself.高兴心情:bemovedtotearsNeverinherlifehadshetastedanythingbetter(delicious)Abrightsmilespreadacrosshisface.Hiseyestwinkled(闪耀)withexcitement.Tearsofjoyfloodedhiseyes.
UsevividdescriptionUsevividdescriptionExample:1).Firsttheybegantomakepopcorn.Secondtheyputthepopcornintopaperbags.→
2)Meredithwenttosupermarketandboughtalotofpaperbags→ →3).Thepopcornlookedbeautiful,smelledsweetandtasteddelicious.→
4).Hewassosadandsatonthechairinthestreet.5)“Yes,I’dliketo.”saidaperson.Bernardfelthappy.
→Meredithwasexcitedlyheadinginto…
Neverinherlifehadshetastedanythingbetter.Hewassosadandstoodtheresilently,tearsrollingdownhischecks.Thekidswerebusymakingpopcornwhiletheirmotherwentouttobuythepaperbags,andthentheyputthepopcornintothem.Bernardsprangtohisfeetandsmiledhappily.Bernard'seyestwinkledwithexcitement.
Linkwords:从句引导词:thatwhowhichwhatwhy
连接词:first,second,next,firstofall,tobeginwith,atlast/intheend,justatthattime,asaresult,inaddition/besides,what'smore,however,therefore
关联词:too…to…,so…that…,eigher…or…neither…nor…notonly…butalso…ontheonehand,ontheotherhandUselinkwordsUselinkwordproperlyYourpopcornissotastythatI’manxioustobuymore
Theyonlysold3bags,sodidtheseconddayandthethirdday....,whichenabledBernardtoearnmoremoneytohelphisfamily.1.习作:Thankstotheirhardwork,theyfinallymadethesweetpopcorn.polish:2.习作:Bernardwastoomovedtosayaword.polish:
3.习作:Bernardtooksomebagsofpopcornaroundthehouses
polish:
4.习作:Butnooneansweredhim,hefeltdown.Hisparentsfacesflashedintohishead.
polish:AppreciationButnooneansweredhim,hefeltdownand
wasclosetotears,justatthistimehisparentsfaces
flashedintohismind.Hewassodelightedthathecouldhardlyspeak,buthissmilingfacespokeforhim.Theirhardworkfinnaly
paidoff.Bernardtooksomebagsofpopcornaroundthehouses,cryinghisgoodsfromdoortodoor.Findyourbestwritinginyourgroupandthendiscussingroupsoffourtopolishittogeth
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