2023-2024学年高一英语续写之动作描写课件

动作描写动作描写动作描写是刻画人物的重要方法之一。通过具体细致地描写某一人物在某一情况下的动作反应、我们能够更好地表现故事中人物的身份、地位、性格、品质、情感、处世态度、心理活动等，使人物形象立体化，同时推动故事情节的发展。我们在进行动作描写时应遵循以下原则：(1)精选动词，准确描述动作。英语中，表现一个动作时往往有许多动词可以选择，但这些词的意思往往有些许差别。我们在重点刻画某个特定的动作时，一定要选取含义明确且具象的动词，而不用抽象或者虚化的动词。这就要求我们在积累动作词汇时，要准确地理解词汇的含义，掌握近义词的区别，从而选取最合适、最精准的词，来达到细腻、生动的描写效果。我们来对比下面三组句子：Group1:Hesaidsomethingtoherinalowvoice.他低声对她说了些什么。Heleanedoverandwhisperedsomethinginherear.他俯下身，在她耳边轻声说了些什么。第一句中的“saidsomethingtoher”没有任何感情色彩，只是陈述事实，而第二句中使用了具体化的表示“说”的动词“whispered”，同时还配有小动作“leanedover”，使语句很有画面感。Group2:Anenormouswhalejumpedoutofthewaterandthendroppedagain.一头巨大的鲸鱼跳出水面，然后又掉了下去。Anenormouswhalethrewitselfoutofthewaterandthencrasheddownagain.一次巨大的鲸鱼从水中跃出，然后再次坠落。第一句中的“jumped”和“dropped”没有把这头鲸的特点“enormous”体现出来，而第二句中的“threw”和“crashed”相较于“jumped”和“dropped”更为精确，让读者充分感受到了鲸的重量和其动作的力量。Group3:"I'llneverforgiveyou,Petersaid,andthenhewalkedoutoftheroomwithoutabackward

glance(n.一瞥；v.瞥；浏览).“我永远不会原谅你，”彼得说，然后他头也不回地走出了房间。"I'llneverforgiveyou,"Petersaid,andthenhestormedoutoftheroomwithoutabackward

glance.“我永远不会原谅你，”彼得说，然后他头也不回地冲出了房间。通过“I'llneverforgiveyou"，我们可以判断出Peter非常生气。而第一句中用“walked完全体现不出他的生气，换成“stormed”后，表示Peter头也不回地“冲”出房间，更能体出人物的情感。即学即练选择恰当的词完成下列的句子。screamed,sighed,chatted,scolded,stammered1.“W-w-what?”he______________________.2.Withinminutesofbeingintroducedthey__________________awaylikeoldfriends.3.He________________themforarrivinglate.4.“Ohwell,betterlucknexttime,”she_________________.5.“Liar!”Sarah_______________asshethrashed(揍)thechild.“Youstoleit.”v.结巴地说出stammeredchattedscoldedsighedscreamed细化动作，体现动作过程。成功的动作描写可以反映人物的心理活动，可以表现人物的性格特征。相反，空洞、笼统的动作描写会使内容缺乏生动性，使人物形象不丰满。人物的动作或简单，或复杂，都不是一下子就能完成的，只有细心观察才能捕捉到最能体现人物特征的慢镜头。因此，在描写动作时，要学会细化动作，把动作过程分解成一连串细微的动作，形成动作链，写出动作的连贯性，这样才能使动作描写具有画面感，使人物形象更立体、丰满。下面介绍几种构建动作过程化最常用的方法：①动作三连法(A,BandC)例1：他上了出租车。动作拆解：上车→拦车+上车+告知目的地Hestoppedataxi,jumpedinwiththesuitcaseandtoldthedriver,"Gototheairport,please."例2：这个歌手开始唱歌。动作拆解：歌手唱歌→扫视观众+深呼吸+开始唱歌Thesingerglancedattheaudience,tookadeepbreathandbegantosing.②非谓语动词第一种：用现在分词表达同一对象同时或几乎同时做出不同的动作例1：学生们进教室了。动作拆解：学生进教室→进教室+有说有笑Thestudentscameintotheclassroom,talkingandlaughing.例2：我们谈笑着。动作拆解：我们谈笑→坐在篝火旁+谈笑Sittingaroundthecampfire,weweretalkingandlaughing.例3：父亲抚摸着我的头发。动作拆解：抚摸头发→看着我+抚摸头发+和我说话Lookingstraightintomyeyes,Dadstrokes(轻抚)myhair,whispering,“Youarethemost

beautifulgirlI'veeverseen.第二种：用havingdone凸显同一对象做出的动作的先后关系例1：他决定什么都不做。动作拆解：决定一先思考+后决定Havingthoughtitovercarefully,hedecidednottodoanything.例2：她终于买到了最喜欢的热狗。动作拆解：买到了热狗→排队+终于买到Havingwaitedinlineforonehour,shefinallygotherfavoritehotdog.③when、while、as、before、after引导时间状语从句例1：她加入了志愿者队伍。动作拆解：加入志愿者队伍→听到招募的消息+申请加入Whensheheardthatalocalhospitalwaslookingforpeopletosewprotectivegear(防护服),sheimmediatelyvolunteered.例2：我听到一声巨响。动作拆解：听到巨响→在车站等车+听到声音When/WhileIwaswaitingatthestop.Iheardabignoise.例3：他换上了干净的衣服。动作拆解：换上干净的衣服→洗澡+擦干+换衣服Hetookacoldshowerandthentoweledhimself(用毛巾擦干身体)beforeheputonthefreshclothes.小贴士：①在进行续写时，我们并不是要把所有的动作都进行拆解，而是要选取最能反映人物身份、地位、性格、品质、情感、处世态度、心理活动的动作进行拆解,形成动作链,从而使人物形象更立体、饱满。②动作链有时会结合情感描写、环境描写、语言描写等。Boilingwithrage,Samstormedoutoftheroom.screaming,"I'mnevercomingback!Sam怒不可遏，气冲冲地冲出房间，尖叫着：“我再也不回来了！”本句中的“'Boilingwithrage”是情感描写,“"stormed'”和“"screaming”是动作链,同时将动作描写和语言描写结合在了一起，形成了饱满的动作面，属于高分表达。.Asnightfalls,wesitaroundthecampfire,sharingghoststories,curiousandfrightened.夜幕降临，我们围坐在篝火旁，分享鬼故事，既好奇又害怕。本句将环境描写“Asnightfalls”、动作描写“sit”“sharing”和情感描写“curiousand

frightened”结合在了一起，形成了饱满的动作面，也是值得我们学习的高分表达。即学即练根据提示改写下列句子。a.Thebirdstruggledforawhile.Thenitlaytheremotionless(adj.不动的，静止的).(用非谓语结构改写句子)Havingstruggledforawhile,thebirdlaytheremotionless.b.Iburiedthebirdsecretly.Iwenthomehurriedly.(用时间状语从句改写句子)AfterIburiedthebirdsecretly,Iwenthomehurriedly./IburiedthebirdsecretlybeforeIwenthomehurriedly.c.Themantookthesack(n.麻袋；洗劫).Hereachedintohispocket.Heplacedfourcoinsinmyhand.(用动作三连法改写句子）Themantookthesack,reachedintohispocketandplacedfourcoinsinmyhand.（3）添加修饰成分，辅助动作表达。适当的修饰语能细致地表达出动作的时间、幅度、速度和力度等，使得动作更加生动、形象、鲜明，人物更具活力，同时还能增强文章的表现力和吸引力。动作描写中最常见的修饰成分是状语，如副词、介词短语等。我们来对比下面两组句子：Group1Anelephantsurgedoutofthewoodsabout20maway,staringatus.Anelephantsuddenlysurgedoutofthewoodsabout20maway,staringdirectlyatus.很明显，相较于第一句，第二句中的”suddenly“体现了大象从树林中冲出来的瞬间性，而“directly”凸显了大象“盯”的力度。n.汹涌；激增；大量；奔涌向前Group2Theboywassofrightenedthatherusheddownthestairsandranhome.Theboywassofrightenedthatherusheddownthestairsandranhomelikelightning.很明显，相较于第一句，第二句添加了“likelighting”后更体现出小男孩的惶恐程度和反应速度，增加了句子的表现力。即学即练选择恰当的词完成下列句子。wildly,angrily,completely,loudly,unsteadily1.Amaninthewaterwasshouting___________________andwavinghisarmsaround_____________________.2.Officialsreacted_____________________tothosecharges.3.Thewaiterwatchedhimgodownthestreet,averyoldmanwalking_____________________butwithdignity.4.Heawokefeeling___________________refreshed(清爽的；恢复精神的）.loudlywildlyangrilyunsteadilycompletelyadv.不稳定地，摇摆地续写练习

WhenIwaselevenyearsold,Ihadabigaccident.IgetscaredevennowwhenIthinkaboutthattime.I

wentskatingnearmyhouse.Thereweremanypeople,andIsawsomeofthemfallingontheice.

Itwasmyfirsttimetogoiceskating,soIwas

nervous.Iwaswonderinghowtoskate.Iwentwitha

friendwhowasveryskillful.Hespentsometime

teachingmehowtoskate,butIdidn'tlearnmuch.

Heleftmeandskatedallaround.Assoonashe

left,Ifelldown.Ienviedtheotherpeoplebecausethey

couldskatewell.

IwasboredbecauseIkeptfallingsoItookoffmy

skatesandjustwalkedaroundontheiceinmyshoes.It

wascoldandmyhandswerefrozen..

Suddenly,Isteppedonsomethingthatwasnot

hard.Whatwasit?Itwasaweakplaceintheice.WhenIsteppedthere,Isankundertheice.Ithought

thatIwasgoingtodie,butIdidmybesttograb

somethingtogetoutfromundertheice.Itridtograb

theedgeoftheice,butitwasverydifficultforan

eleven-year-old.

Itseemedlikeaverylongtime,likeayear.Then,fortunately,someonehelpedme.Hegrabbedmyarms

andpulledmeup.So,IlivedandI'mstillalivetoday.

Ithankedhim.Atthattime,myfriendcameback.Iwasannoyedathimbecausehewassupposedtotake

careofme,buthedidn't.Hewasembarrassed.WhenI

tookataxihome,thetaxidriverwassurprisedandasked

whathadhappened.Ididn'twanttosayanythingbecauseIwastiredandscared.Evennow,wheneverIthinkaboutthattime,Ifeeluncomfortable.Idon’twanttogoskatingagainevennow..Paragraph1:ItwaslonglongbeforeIwentskatingonceagain,________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Paragraph2:However,eversincethenIhaven’tfoundanytimetogoskating,______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Paragraph1:ItwaslonglongbeforeIwentskatingonceagain,andthatwaswhenwegraduatedfromtheuniversity.Ourmonitoradvisedusalltogoskating,andIdecidedtofollowhisadvicealthoughIstillfelyalittlescared.Soonwewereactiveontheice.Oneofmyroommateswasveryskillfulandshepatientlyexplainedtomehowtostart.Stepbystep,Iwasabletostandupontheicemyselfandheadedoutalittle,notsosteadilyandIfelldownmanytimes.IwasgratefultoherforImanagedtoskatethatday,thoughIcouldn’tbelikeothers,whocouldskatewell.Ihadanicetimethatday!Paragraph1:ItwaslongbeforeIwentskatingonceagain,accompaniedbyoneofmyfriends.ThistimeIwascarefulandcautious,andmyfriendtookspecialcareofme.IwassofortunatethistimethatIma