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第第页英语短篇小说ATrayofIceCubes英语读物
ATrayofIceCubes
DaphneandColinwerespendingFridayeveningastheyspentmostFridayevenings–infrontofthetellywithamicrowaveddinnerandabottleofsweetGermanwine,watchingtheirfavouriteprogramme;acamcordercompilationofmatrimonialmishapsandwedding-daydisasterscalledTheWorldsWorstWeddings.
Eachprogrammetreateditsviewerstoaparadeofdoomedbridestumblingdownchurchsteps,orskiddingbackwardsandlandinglegs-in-the-airondancefloors.
Beautifullycrafted,four-tieredweddingcakestoppledslowlysidewayslikePisantowersandthencollapsedintorubblyheapsoficing.Horsesboltedwiththeiremptylandausfromthechurchgates.Theweatheroutsidethechurcheswasalwaysturbulent,liftingthebridesdressesupovertheirheadstorevealsaucybridallingerie,orwhippingthetophatsofftheheadsofthemenwhochasedthemthroughchurchyardslikefarmersaftertroupesofgreyhens.
Thisanthologyofcrookedlyshot,poorlyfocusedvisionsofminorcatastropheshadDaphneandColininstitches.Theylaugheduntiltheyhurt.Theywincedatpainfulbits(drunkensword-dancing,marqueesbulgingwithstoredrain),drewintheirbreath,gaveeachothermock-horrifiedlooks,groaned,giggled,shooktheirheadspityinglyandputtheirhandsovertheirmouths.
Bytheendoftheprogramme,asthecreditsrolledquicklyoverarepriseofthechoicestclips,ColinandDaphnefelte*hausted.Theirjawsachedandtheirvoiceswerehoarse.Butatthesametimetheyfeltrefreshedandreassuredbythesensetheyhadthatotherpeoplesliveswereatrainofsmallcalamities,andthatwhiletheirownlivesmightnotbeeverythingtheydwishedfor,atleasttheywereorderedhavensofstaticobjectsandcommonsensepeople.TheWorldsWorstWeddingsrenewedforthemeachweek
英语读物
theirsenseoftheirownworthaspeoplewhilefortifyingthemfortheroutinestrugglesoftheweekahead.
DaphnewasmanageroftheErithbranchofBurgerWorldwhereshesupervisedacrewoftwentysurlyteenagersandtwoshiftmanagers.Shecouldhandle(thoughrarelyneededto)onehundredandfiftycustomersanhour.Shewasagoodbranchmanager.Shehad,inthewordsofDale,herareae*ecutive,ketchupinherblood.Shewasblonde,wide,bu*omandclever.Shewasforty-seven.
Colinhercoeval,childhoodsweetheartandhusbandofthirtyyearswasabusdriver.Hehadpower-steeredreddouble-deckersfromTrafalgarSquarethroughthesuburbsofSouthEastLondonforalmostaslongastheydbeenmarried.IntheearlydayshehadsataloneintheforwardcabofaRoutemaster,obeyingthebells,buzzersandknocksofhisconductor.Then,atthebeginningoftheSeventies,hewasaskedtomergetwopeopleintohisonebodyandbecomebothdriverandconductorofthenewpay-as-you-enterbuses.Ithadbeendifficultatfirst,andhefeltbadabouttheconductorswholosttheirjobs,buthemanagedthetransitionwithsomepanache.HehastwicebeenafinalistintheSouthEastBusDriveroftheYearAwards.Hegenuinelycaredabouthishumancargo.Hetookcornerscarefully.Whenhestoppedhestoppedgentlyandhispassengersallnoddedinunison.Hissedentarylifeandfondnessfortheoddpinthadgivenhimaroly-polyfigureandathickeningoffataroundtheneck.Hishairwasdarkbutthinningontop,combedbackandoutofthewaybehindhisears,halfaninchshortofunkempt.Histeethweresharp,symmetrical,stainedwithcigartobacco.
Hewasstretchedoutonthecouch,stillinhisbusdrivers”uniformwhich,withitswine-colouredblazerandstripedtie,madehimlooklikearidiculousschoolboy.ThisaddedtotheshockDaphnefeltwhenheturnedhisbrick-redface,stilldampwithlaughing,towardsherandsaid,inavoicequietwithe*citement,
“Love,IthinkImpregnant.”
-2-
Daphnewasbusywithtomatoes,slicingtheminamachinecalledatomatoshark.
英语读物
India,oneofhershiftmanagers,waspreparingburgercartons.TherewasalullintradeatBurgerWorld,asthereusuallywasmid-afternoon.Indiahatedtheselullsastheymadethetimedrag,althoughshefoundasimplesatisfactioninthecleverorigamiofherburgercartons.Aflatcardenvelopeise*tractedfromthepacketwhich,withadefttwistofthethumbs,flipsintoathree-dimensionalbo*withhingedlid,catchandsteamvents.
OfallthecrewIndiawasclosesttoDaphne.Theydidnotmeetoutsidethe
workplace(apartfromtheChristmasdo)butinBurgerWorldtheyregardedeachotherasfriends.IndialikedDaphnesboldness,hersturdiness.Sheadmiredher.ShethoughtifDaphnewasabuildingshewouldbeaprovincialtownhall–solid,sensible,yetnotwithoutornamentationandhumour.Indiawouldbeoneofthoselittlestripedtentsworkmenerectovermanholes.SoshereactedatfirstwithdisbeliefandbewildermentwhenshenoticedDaphnewascrying.
Sheleftherteeteringtowerofyet-to-be-filledcartonsandwalkedhesitantly
towardsDaphneasiftoastatuethathadmoved.Closershecouldseeitwastrue–
Daphne,goodoldblonde-haired,piss-taking,dependableDaphnewascrying.Thewaterwasspillingoutofhereyes,fallingofftheendofhernoseandsaltinghertomatoes.
“Areyoucrying,Daph?”Indiauselesslyasked.
Daphne,whoseheadwashanging,suddenlydrewherfaceback,asiftomakethetearswithdrawintohereyes.Itwasasthoughshehadntknownshewascrying.Shefumbledinherpocketforahanky,couldntfindone.Indiagaveheraserviette.
“Stupid,”saidDaphne,holdingthepapertohereyeslikeablindfold,stillwithherotherhandontheleverofthetomatoshark.
“AnythingIcando?”SaidIndia.
Daphnetookadeepbreath,helditforwhatseemedlikeadangerouslengthoftime,thene*haledloudly.Shetookthepaperawayfromhereyes,lookedatIndiawithahalfsmilethatwasmeanttosayImfinenow,thencollapsedintouncontrollablesobs.Someoftheotherstaffnoticed.Baseball-cappedheadspeeredroundthesidesofbroilers,orbeneathfrierhoods.IndiatookholdofDaphnesshakingframe(thefirsttime,sherealised,thatshedtouchedhermanager)andguidedherintothecrampedspaceoftelephones,files,listsandmemosthatservedasanoffice.
英语读物
“WhatsupDaph?Whatsgoingon?”
“Icantsay.Nothing.Sodit.”
“Dontyouthinkyoushouldtalkaboutit?”
Daphnegaveachokedlaugh.
“Iwouldntknowwheretobegin.”
“Trythebeginning.”
Daphnecompressedherlips,shookherheadsoslightlyitwasliketrembling.“Isityouroldman?IstheresomethingwrongwithColin?”
Thiswasaneducatedguess.ColinshealthwasaregulartopicofconversationbetweenDaphneandIndia-hislatestdigestiveproblemorheartattackscare,his
creepingarthritis,evenhisoccasionallackoflibido.IndiahadnevermetColinbutshethoughtshemustknowmoreabouthisbodythanhisowndoctor.
IndiacouldtellbyDaphnesstillnessthatshedhitthemark.
“Whatisit?Isheill?”
“Itsoundssostupid,Indialove.Idontknowhowtosayit.Ihaventtoldanyone,notevenmyMum.”
“Youcantellme.”
“WellIvegottotellsomeone…”Daphnewaswhisperingnow,eventhough
therewasnoonewithinearshot,“…afewmonthsago–aboutsi*monthsago–Colingotthisideaintohishead–Imeanhereallybelievesit,thathes…”
“Yes?”Indiaseyeswereroundande*pectant.
“Hethinkshespregnant.”
Silence.
ThenIndialetoutagiggle,quicklyputherhandtohermouthasiftocatchit,butshecarriedongigglingintoherhand,muffled.
“DontIndia,pleaselove.”
“Imsorry,butthishasgottobeajoke,yeah?”
“ThatswhatIthoughtatfirst.Ajoke.Asickjoke.Wegaveuptryingtohavekidstenyearsago.Ivetoldyouallaboutthat.Thereisntadaygoesby,evennow,whenIdontthinkaboutthekidswecouldhavehadifthingshadworkedout.Icouldhavebeenagranbynow.ButIthoughtColinhadforgottenallaboutit.Youknowhenever
英语读物
wasthatbothered,notreally,evenwhenweweregoinguptothecliniceveryweek.Hewasdoingitformereally.Butnowitlookslikesomethingsgottohim…Hesstartedconvertingourspareroombackintoanursery.Wehaditasanurserywhenweweregoingforthetreatment.Justhopingwecouldputababyinit.Justtohavethechancetomuckaroundwithbabythings.Whenwefinallycalleditadayweguttedtheroom.Itbrokemyheart.Wedidntthrowanythingaway,itwasfunny,butsuddenlyeveryoneweknewneededbabystuff.Mostofitwenttomysister–theclothes,thecot,themajorityofthetoys.WepaintedovertheTiggerswithoatmeal,thenIusedtheroomformychinapainting.Youknowmeandmychina.Wenevermissacraftfair.Ihadalittlekilninthereandeverything.ButnowhesgoneandpaintednewTiggersonthewalls.Hessplashedoutonaposhcotwithbrassbitson.Hesayswehavetohaveeverythingreadyintime.ItsdueinNovember.”
“Daphne,youvegottogethimtoadoctor.Gethisheadsortedout…”
“Iknow.Thetroubleis,ineveryotherwayhescompletelynormal,youknow,soColinish,sobloodyboringlyColinish.Hesstilldrivinghisbuses,thoughhereckonshewontfitbehindthewheelformuchlonger.Hesgivenupthepipeandcigars.Hedoesntevenhaveadrinknow.Hesayshesgottotakecareofhimself.ButwhatreallyfrightensmeisthatImstartingtobelievehim.ItslikeImgoingmadaswell.Ifindmyselflookingathisbeerguttoseeifitsgettingbigger…”
“Andisit?”
Daphneallowedherselfabrief,sneezylaugh.
“Ikeepthinkingitisgettingbigger.Andhesoffthebeer.WhenhesasleepIputmyhandonitandfeelformovements.MaybeIdofeelsomethingkick,orisitjusta
bubbleofwind?ThenIlllistenforaheartbeat.Icanhearsomething,butisitjustColinsheart.Idontknow…”
“ButDaph,youvegottoholdontothetruefacts.Youvegottorememberhecantbepregnant.”
“Butwhynot?”DaphnesvoicehadacquiredahaughtinessthatwasnewtoIndia.Indiatriedtomatchthetone,
“Hesablokeisnthe?”
Daphneclosedhereyesdismissively.
英语读物
“Colinspunmethislongstoryabouthowhewenttoaclinicwheretheyretestingoutanewtypeoffertilitytreatment,whichmeansthemancarryingtheembryoinsteadofthewoman.”
Indiaisdismissivenow.
“Itstrue,”Daphnecontinued,“Ivereadupaboutit.Therearepeopledoingworkonitrightnow.Theysaytheydontneedanywombs,justaplaceinthebodywithagoodbloodsupply.Theyveplantedfertilisedeggsontheouterwallofthelargeintestineofamalemouseanditsgoneontogivebirth.IknowtheyneedoneofmyeggsbutColinsaystheykeptsomefromwhenweweregoingforthetreatment.Hereckonstheyvegotawholedishofthemupthere.IknowitsrubbishbutIcanthelpthinkingsometimes.AndthenIlookatthathugetummyofhisanditmoves…”
“Daphne,Idontwanttoknow.Ofcoursehehasntbeentoanyclinic.Hes
flippedhislid.Hesgottothatage,allmengettoit.”
Daphnelaughedinwardlyattheconfidencewithwhicheighteen-year-oldIndiatalkedaboutmen.
“Histomatoeshavegonetopot.Thewholecrop.Everyyearhegrowsthese
wonderfultomatoes.Theyvegotthebestspotinthegarden,sunnyalldaylong.Heevengoesdownthestableswithashovelsohecanmulchthehorseshitintothem.TheyrereadybylateAugust.Well,thisyearhesjustleftthem.HedlostinterestbyJune.TheywerestillgreeninAugust.Hesayshesgonerightofftomatoesnow,becauseofhiscondition.Weusedtohavesuchlovelysalads,”Daphnelookedacrossatthebowlofheapedtomatoslices,likeopenedhearts.“Ihadtopickthemmyself.Stillgreen.Hewasntgoingtobother.Iputtheminbrownpaperbagsandkeptthemunderthestairs.Theyreonlyjustbeginningtogoyellownow.Hehascravingsforpotatoes.”
Indiadidntknowwhattosay.Shenoticedaposteronthebackofthedoorwhichremindedstaffoftheimportanceofadd-ons,andprovidedascriptwhichspecifiedthee*actphrasingtobeused.Ifacustomerwantsahamburger,staffmustsaywouldyoulikefrieswiththat?Ifacustomerwantsahamburgerwithfries,staffmustsaywouldyoulikeadrinkwiththat?BurgerWorldprovidesstaffwithascriptforalmosteverypossibleinteractionwithacustomer,fromthecheerygreetingstothecheerygoodbyes.Staffaree*pectedtofollowthesescriptstotheletter.Indiafounditveryhelpfulatfirst,
英语读物
indealingwithcustomers,tohaveherwordswrittenforherinadvance,butafterawhileshefoundthatitdamagedherabilitytotalkspontaneouslyoutsidetheworkplace.Shewantedscriptsforeverysocialencounter,andhadtoworkhardatrelearningherabilitytoconverse.Now,withDaphne,shelongedagainforguidancefromheadoffice.
“ImoutofmyDepth,Daph.”
“Imalright,Indialove.Getbacktoyourprep.Illsortmyoldmanout
somehow.”
Indiawentbacktoherprep,magickingcartonsoutofnothing.Daphnewentbacktoslicinghertomatoes.Theynever,fortherestoftheirlives,sayanythingtoeachotheronthissubjectagain.
-3-
TheWorldsWorstWeddingsison.Daphneiswatchingitalone.Colinishavingalie-downupstairs.
Daphneisntfindingtheprogrammefunnythisweek.Sheiswatchingitbutthelaughterisntcoming.Thosetopplingweddingcakesjustlooksadnow.Thewindyweddingdays,floodedmarquees,runawaycarriages.Oneclipinparticularmakesherwince–whenagroomfaintsduringtheceremony,fallsintohiswife-to-beandknockshertothefloor.
Butshewatchestheprogrammeanyway,eventhoughshehasntfounditfunnyforweeks.ItisNovembernow.Lastyearthisprogrammesawthemintowinter,tookthemuptoChristmas.ButDaphnewondersifshellwatchitagain.
Coliniswatchingitontheportableupstairs,whichproducesastereophoniceffect.Thelaughterfromtheprogrammeisthusgivenastrangelyhauntingquality,asthoughitisnotcomingfromthetelevision,butfromthehouseitself.
Daphne,astheprogrammefinisheswithacuriousnoteoftriumphalism,barelynoticesthecallcomingfromupstairs.Colinsweakvoicecomesdowntoher
“Daph,love.”
英语读物
“Whatisit?”Shecallsback,slightlyimpatiently.ForthelasttwoweeksColinhasbeenoffworkandhasspentmostofthetimeinbed.
“Canyoucomeup,love?”
Sheleavesitforafewminutes,clearsawayhermostlyuneatenpizza,putsahalf-emptycoffeemugintothesink,wipestheworktopandthengoeswearilyupstairs.Si*monthsofworryinghavee*haustedher.
Shewalksintothebedroom.Colinislyingonhisbackontopofthebedclothes.Hisabdomenlookshugetoher,suddenly,agreatdome,allblubber,sheissure,butithasgrownanywayoverthelastsi*months.Hehasthetvremoteinhishandandisgrippingitsohardhisknucklesarecreamywhite.Theportablesetonthedressingtableisababbleofadvertising.
“Whatsup?”Shewasgoingtosay,butonseeingColinsfacerealises.Heisred,hisbreathisshortandhisfaceisloosewithfear,theeyeshelpless.
“Itsstarting,love.”
Daphnesitsbesidehim.Hiswholebodyseemstoclenchandunclenchlikeafist.Sheputsherhandonhisclammyforehead.
“Takeiteasy,love,”shesays,“Juststaycalm.”
“Ifeelfunnyinmytummy,Daph,”hesays,“Love,Icanfeelitcomingout.I
thinkmywatershavebroken.”
ShenoticesadarkstainonthebedspreadingoutfrombetweenColinslegs.
“Imscared,Daph,allthisstuffscomingout.”
“Dontworry.”
“Canyoustopitcomingout,Love,getatowelorsomething.”
Shegoestothebathroom,returnswithabathtoweltheywerestillpayingthecataloguefor.
“Openyourlegs,Love.”
Heopensthem.Anunpleasantodourrises.Daphnepressesthetowelupagainsthim.
“ShallIgetthedoctor,Colin?”
“No,”hesaysurgently,“No,please.”
“Amidwife?”
英语读物
“Ithinkitstoolate,Love.”
Thebediswarmandwet.SuddenlyColinclaspshisswollenbelly,shoutsto
Daphne,
“Itscoming,Daph.Getsomethingtocatchit.Quickly,Love,abucket,
anything.”
Sherushestothebathroomagain.Thereisnothingsuitable.Shehastogo
downstairstothekitchen.Theonlythingshecanfindistheirnon-stickwok.Daphnehasonlyuseditonceinfiveyears.
Colinismoaningwhenshereturns.Sheputsthelipsofthewokupagainsthisperineum.Thin,cloudyliquiddribblesintoit.Thebedroomreeks.Coliniscrying,tearsrunningsidewaysdownhisface,hislipswide,histonguelikeaplumplittlepluminhismouth.
LaterDaphneclearsup.Sheyanksthesheetsoffthebed,pilesthemintothe
alreadyoverloadedwashingbasket,thenwonderswhattodowiththemattress.Colinisdownstairsonthecouchinadressinggown.Shehasgivenhimabathandhesmellsnice.AftershehassortedthebeddingoutDaphnecomesdownstairsintothetvroomandkissesColinonthecrownofthehead,wherehishairisthinnest,takinginthefragranceofhisscalp.
“Howaboutadrink?”Shesays.
Colinthinksforamoment,thennods,almostapologetically.
“Aniceginandtonic?”
Colinnodsagain.
Daphnegoestothekitchen,takesatrayoficecubesoutofthefridge.Adozennuggetsoffrozenwater.Asusualshehastroublee*tractingthem.Shebendsthetrayasmuchasitsmetalwillallow,andthereisatired,creakingsound.Thensomethingsnapsandanicecubepopsoutandclattersontheworktop.Shehastouseaknifetogettherestout,leveringdangerouslyatthechippededgesofeachcube.Theremustbeaneasierwayofmakingice,shethinksasshedividesherfourcubesbetweentwotumblers,splashessomeginandtonicwaterontopofthemandlistenstothewheezesandcracksastheye*pandintothewarmthofthealcohol.
英语读物
ShetakesthedrinksintothetvroomandsitswithColinfortherestofthe
evening,thentheygotobed.Daphneleavesthetrayoficecubesoutontheworktop.Sheforgetstoputthembackinthefridge.
Inthemorning,whenshecomesdownin
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