读后续写师生情类-误拿手表老师包容讲义-高考英语作文复习专项

阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。Afteranexhaustingday,Jackwanderedinthestreet,smilingwhilethinkingofhisstudents.Jackwasarespectableandconsiderateteacherwhilehisstudentstookgoodcareofhimtoo.Suddenly,afamiliarfigureflashedintoJack’seyes.ItwasMark,hisjuniorhighschoolteacher.Withthrill,Jackdashedforward,greetingenthusiastically,“Mark,howareyou?”Takingouthispresbyopia(老花镜),Markstudiedthepassionateyoungmaninfrontofhim,hesitatedforamoment,andgotconfused.,“Sorry?Havewemetbefore?”Notdisappointedatall,Jackintroducedhimselfindelight,“Sorry,Mark.I’mJackSmith,fromClass2,Grade8,graduatingfromKevinJuniorHighSchoolin2001.NowI’mateacher.”Hearingthewords,Markwaspuzzledbutalsodelighted,askingaseriesofquestions.“Whycan’tIrememberyou?Areyouateachernow?”Inspiteofpooreyesight,Markdidhavesuchabrilliantmemorythathecouldevenrememberalmostallhisstudents.“Well,infact,youonlytookchargeofourclassforonlyoneday,andsomethinghappenedthatday.Ibecameateacherbecauseofyourinspiration.”TheoldMark,curious,keptraisingquestionssuchaswhentheymet,howhehadinspiredhimtobeateacher,andsoon.“Oneday,afriendofminecameinwithanicenewwatch.IwassocrazyaboutitthatIdecidedtotakeitandIdid.Afterashortwhile,myfriendfounditdisappearandimmediatelyreportedtotheteacher,you,whohappenedtobeinchargeofourclassforthatdaybecauseourteacherwasill.”AmixtureofemotionsfloatedinJack’seyesonrecallingtheshamefulhistory.Thatday,Markcameandtoldthewholeclassthatsomeoneintheclasscouldnotfindhiswatchandwhoevertookitpleasereturnit.Jackwastoofrightenedtohanditin.注意:1.

续写词数应为150左右2.

请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。Then,Markclosedthedoorandtoldallstudentstogetup.____________ButMarkkeptsearchingeveryone’spockets.___________________________题型解读动作描写主要是通过对人物的动作、行为和活动的描写来展示人物的性格、品质身份、地位、处境和状态等。好的动作描写可以使人物形象栩栩如生、活灵活现，个性特征更加鲜明。读后续写的体裁是以人物为中心的叙事性记叙文，需要大篇幅的动作描写，因此做好人物的动作描写显得尤为重要。四个应对策略1.要准确。要使用精准化动作类词汇对动作进行细致描写，用一系列小动作而不用大动作或者用含义比较明确的动词而不用抽象或虚化的动词来描述，以使描写更加具体生动。试比较下面两句:(1)Thelittleboysaidsorrytohismother.(2)Thelittleboyhunghisheadandmurmuredanapologytohismother.【分析】句(1)中saidsorryto不带任何感情色彩，而句(2)中使用了具体化的表示“说”的动词murmured，从而使一个不愿意道歉又不得不道歉的小男孩的形象栩栩如生地复现在读者脑海中。有过程。记叙文中在描写人物个性的动作时，如果我们蜻蜒点水、一笔带过，就很难突出人物形象，也很难给人以深刻的印象。而应按照顺序描写一连串动作过程，既要把人物做事情的过程写清楚又要把人物活动的步骤写具体，这样才能够使得人物形象鲜明，文章层次清楚。试比较下面两句(1)Shewenttocatchthebutterfly.(2)Shecreptalongthepath,bentoverswiftlyandcuppedherhandsaroundthebutterflygently.【分析】句(1)在描写主人公捕捉蝴蝶的动作时，没有细节的动作描写，因此显得很平淡而句(2)运用了creep，bend，cup三个连贯的动词生动具体地描述了主人公小心翼翼捕捉蝴蝶的微妙过程，具有极强的画面感。因此，在续写过程中，在必要的地方恰当使用一连串的动词来表示过程，能为文章增添不少色彩。3.借修辞。当的修辞手法(比喻、拟人·夸张等)来帮助描写动作，让动作描写变得更有表现力。比较以下几组句子(1)Theoldman'sfacewrinkled.(2)Theoldman'sfacewaslikeawitheredapple.(比喻)Mystomachwasachingfornoteatingontime.Mystomachwaspunishingmefornoteatingontime.(拟人)(1)Whensheheardthebadnews,shecried.(2)Whensheheardthebadnews,ariveroftearspouredout.(夸张)【分析】上面每组中的(2)句分别使用了比喻、拟人、夸张的修辞手法，使得动作的描述更加生动形象，更加吸引眼球。富节奏。动词按其意义可分为静态动词和动态动词。动态动词可以生动展现人或事物的运动状态，让原本静止的画面像放电影一样，吸引读者投人故事中感受人物的情绪和内心，使用富有节奏变化的动词可以推动波澜起伏的故事情节从而更加直观地表现主题。比较以下几组句子Unpackingthebox,therewasadelicatenecklaceinside.打开盒子，里面有一条精美的项链.(2)Iunpackedthebox,adelicatewatchinsidewasinsightandmyjawdropped.f尹盒子，看到里面有一条精美的项链，我的下巴都掉下来了。【分析】句(1)中was是静态动词，无法凸显“惊喜”生日派对的主题，而句(2)中的dropped就是动态动词，形容非常吃惊的状况。(1)Thereisabrokencarontheroad.路上有一辆破车。(2)Thecarwentoutofcontrolandcrashedintoawall这辆车失控了，撞到了墙上。【分析】个句(1)中的is是一个静态动词而句(2)改用crashinto之后，能够凸显出事故发生的过程，让读者感受到事故的严重性，加深主题意义.文本分析：五要素：WhenAfteranexhaustingday,inClass2,Grade8in2001，OnedayWhereinthestreet,intheclassroomWhoJack,MarkWhatJackcameacrossMarkyearslaterbutMarkseemednottorememberWhyHetookchargeofJack'sclassforonlyoneday挖掘原文中的人物情感：1.Afteranexhaustingday,Jackwanderedh.street.smilingwhilethinkingofhisstudents.Jackwasrespectableandconsiderateteacherwhilehisstudentstookgoodcareofhim,too.可以作为续写伏笔，暗指Mark也会成为一位体贴受学生爱戴的老师。伏笔指将上文看似无关紧要的人物或事件作为在续写下文时可能出现的人物或事件的预先提示或暗示，目的效果。的达到“前有伏笔，后有照应了。2.“Well,infact,youonlytookchargeofourclassforonlyoneday,andsomethinghappenedthatday.Ibecameateacherbecauseofyourinspiration.”TheoldMark,curious,keptraisingquestionssuchaswhentheymet,howhehadinspiredhimtobeateacher,andsoon.暗示下文Mark一定做了让Jack深深触动的事情，触动Jack也决心作“Well,infact,y一名体贴受学生爱戴的老师。铺垫指故事高潮的前奏，如环境描写、对话描述等，推动主要人物主要内容的展示，帮助制造悬念和矛盾冲突。Hearingthewords,Markwaspuzzledbutalsodelighted,askingaseriesofquestions.“Whycan'tIrememberyou?showingJack'sloveandrespecttohisteacher.故事感情线索：thrill,enthusiasticallydelightedNotdisappointed;brilliant;puzzledbutalsodelighteddisappointed,nervous,anxious,scared故事情节线索：JackcameacrossMark.Markdidn'trememberJackatall.JacksaidthathebecameateacherbecauseofMike'sinspirationJackrecalledMarkhowheinspiredhim.分析续写段首，确定续写方向根据段首句1(Then,Markclosedthedoorandtoldallstudentstogetup.然后，马克关上门，让所有的学生起来。)及时间线索词Then可设问如下:1)Whichwordsorphrasesshouldbefocusedon?(closedthedoor,getup)2HowdidMarksearchforthewatch?3)Whatwereallstudentsfeelingandreaction?4)WhatwasJack'sfeelingandreaction?根据段首句2(ButMarkkeptsearchingeveryone'spockets.但是马克一直在搜查每个人的口袋。)，并结合上段内容可知，本段要续写的应该是老师完成搜查并宣布了结果，可设想以下问题:Whichwordsorphrasesshouldbefocusedon?(keptsearching,pockets.DidMarkfindthelostwatch?WhatdidMarkdoafterfindingoutthewatch?WhatdidJackdofinally?借助文本资源，创设续写情节根据已知人物、事件及续写段落首句预测故事总体的发展Paragraph1:[开端]马克让所有的学生起来。[故事发展]→不情愿地站了起来。「高潮]杰克感到绝望和恐慌!马克似乎看透了杰克一马克什么也没说，让他安静地坐下来。Paragraph2:[结局]完成了他的检查→杰克感到很羞愧他决定把手表还给马克→马克称赞他勇敢承认错误→杰克下定决心成为像Mark一样受人尊敬、体贴的老师【感悟]教书是一项很有意义的工作。参考范文：Then,Markclosedthedoorandtoldallstudentstogetup.They,includingJack,wereveryconfusedandreluctantlystoodup.Markstoodontheplatformandsaidseriously,"Sincenoonehandedmethewatch,I'vedecidedtocheckyourpocketsonebyone."YoucanwaitformetocheckbeforesittingdownAfterhearingthesewords,Jack'semotionswereveryplicated.Nowthewatchisinhispocket!SeeingMarkreachingouttoeveryone'spockets,despairandpanicsweptthroughJacklikefiercewaves.Hewastooscaredtolookattheteacher,butMarkseemedtoseethroughhim.ToJack'ssurprise,Markdidn'tsayanythingandaskedhimtositdownquietly.Jackthoughtthesearchendedhere.ButMarkkeptsearchingeveryone'spockets.Aftera