HOWTOGROWOLD+中文译文修改版

Translatedbysog@2005-4-513:48古典的英国英语很难翻译，特别是罗素的文章。早几年读傅雷翻译的忙里偷闲，拿这篇文章练一下手，欠妥处请多指点。sog@2005-4-513:471.Inspiteofthetitle,thisarticlewillreallybeonhownottogrowold,which,atmytimeoflife,isamuchmoreimportantsubject.Myfirstadvicewouldbetochooseyourancestorscarefully.Althoughbothmyparentsdiedyoung,Ihavedonewellinthisrespectasregardsmyotherancestors.Mymaternalgrandfather,itistrue,wascutoffintheflowerofhisyouthattheageofsixty-seven,butmyotherthreegrandparentsalllivedtobeovereighty.OfremoterancestorsIcanonlydiscoveronewhodidnotlivetoagreatage,andhediedofadiseasewhichisnowrare,namely,havinghisheadcutoff。不管标题是怎么写的，这篇文章实际上告诉你的是如何减缓衰老，这样一个主题在我现在的生命阶段是很重要的。我的第一个建议是认真仔细的去考察一下自己的宗谱。虽然我的父母去世的比较早，但是我的别的祖先都活的比较长寿。我敬爱的祖父，在67岁结束了自己像花期一样富有朝气的生命，我的其余几位祖辈的年龄都超过了80。在别的远祖当中，只有一位活的不是很长久，他死于一种被砍头的现在已经灭绝的疾病(不知道怎么很好的翻译这一句幽默)。2.Agreatgrandmotherofmine,whowasafriendofGibbon,livedtotheageofninety-two,andtoherlastdayremainedaterrortoallherdescendants.Mymaternalgrandmother,afterhavingninechildrenwhosurvived,onewhodiedininfancy,andmanymiscarriages,assoonasshebecameawidow,devotedherselftowoman’shighereducation.ShewasoneofthefoundersofGirtonCollege,andworkedhardatopeningthemedicalprofessiontowomen.SheusedtorelatehowshemetinItalyanelderlygentlemanwhowaslookingverysad.Sheinquiredthecauseofhismelancholyandhesaidthathehadjustpartedfromhistwograndchildren.―GoodeseventytwograndchildrenandifIweresadeachtimeIpartedfromoneofthem,Ishouldhaveadismalexistence!‖―Madresnaturale,‖hereplied.Butspeakingasoneoftheseventy-two,Ipreferherrecipe.Aftertheageofeightyshefoundshehadsomedifficultyingettingtosleep,soshehabituallyspentthehoursfrommidnightto3a.m.inreadingpopularscience.Idonotbelievethatsheeverhadtimetonoticethatshewasgrowingold.This,Ithink,isproperrecipeforremainingyoung.Ifyouhavewideandkeeninterestsandactivitiesinwhichyoucanstillbeeffective,youwillhavenoreasontothinkaboutthemerelystatisticalfactofthenumberofyearsyouhavealreadylived,stilllessoftheprobablebrevityofyoufuture.Gibbon直到生命的最后一天一直都让她的子孙后代感到惊奇。on她经常给我们讲述她在意大利遇到一位年老绅士的故事，当时，这位老年人看上去很忧愁悲伤。祖母去询个孙子之一。在80岁之后，她发现自己睡眠不是很好，于是她养成了从午夜到凌晨3点钟阅读流行科学杂志的习惯。我一直不相信她会有空余时间去注意到自己已经变老了，我认为这是保持年轻的一种好方法。如果你有广泛、热烈的兴趣和日常行动并在其中有很好的效率，你没有缘由去成天想那些已经逝去的许多岁月，并很少考虑不会太长久的将来年月。3.AsregardshealthIhavenothingusefultosaysinceIhavelittleexperienceofillness.IeatanddrinkwhateverIlike,andsleepwhenIcannotkeepawake.Ineverdoanythingwhateveronthegroundthatitisgoodforhealth,thoughinactualfactthethingsIlikedoingaremostlywholesome.有关于健康方面，我没有太多有用的建议可以讲，因为我很少得病。我吃喝自己喜欢的东西，困顿了就去睡觉。我从来不按照任何所谓有益健康的(医生)建议行事，虽然我所做的任何喜欢的事情都常有益于健康的。4.Psychologicallytherearetwodangerstobeguardedagainstinoldage.Oneoftheseisundueabsorptioninthepast.Itdoesnotdotoliveinmemories,inregretsforthegoodolddays,orinsadnessaboutfriendswhoaredead.One’sthoughtsmustbedirectedtothefutureandtothingsaboutwhichthereissomethingtobedone.Thisisnotalwayseasy:one’sownpastisgraduallyincreasingweight.Itiseasytothinktooneselfthatone’semotionsusedtobemorevividthantheyare,andone’smindkeener.Ifthisistrueitshouldbeforgotten,andifitisforgottenitwillprobablynotbetrue.在精神生活方面老年人有两个方面的危险因素需要注意。其中之一就是老是沉浸在过去的会议中，不能在回忆当中生活，不要为逝去的好岁月感到遗憾，也不要为已经去世的朋友感到悲哀。一个人的思想必须被引导向未来和那些必须要完成的事情上。这并不是一件容易做到的事情：一个人的过去岁月在逐渐的增多，很容易沉湎于那些昔日的雄心抱负，和那些无法忘怀的情结。如果情形确实是这样的，就应当都去忘却；如果都忘记了，逝去的就不应当是真实的。5.Theotherthingtobeavoidedisclingingtoyouthinthehopeofsuckingvigorfromitsvitality.Whenyourchildrenaregrownuptheywanttolivetheirownlives,andifyoucontinuetobeasinterestedinthemasyouwerewhentheywereyoung,youarelikelytobecomeaburdentothem,unlesstheyareunusuallycallous.Idonotmeanthatoneshouldbewithoutinerestinthem,butone’sinterestshouldbecontemplativeand,ifpossible,philanthropic,butnotundulyemotional.Animalsbecomeindifferenttotheiryoungassoonastheiryoungcanlookafterthemselves,buthumanbeings,owingtothelengthofinfancy,findthisdifficult.另外一件事情，就是尽量避免抱着从青年人身上获取活力的目的去亲密接近年轻人，如果你一定要对他们抱有兴趣，除非他们看自己的时候，都会对他们变得比较冷漠；但是对人类而言，因为幼年期比较长，最后发现要做到这一点比较困难。6.Ithinkthatasuccessfuloldageiseasiestforthosewhohavestrongimpersonalinterestsinvolvingappropriateactivities.Itisinthisspherethatlongexperienceisreallyfruitful,anditisinthisspherethatthewisdombornofexperiencecanbeexercisedwithoutbeingoppressive.Itisnousetellinggrown-upchildrennottomakemistakes,bothbecausetheywillnotbelieveyou,andbecausemistakesareanessentialpartofeducation.Butifyouareoneofthosewhoareincapableofimpersonalinterests,youmayfindthatyourlifewillbeemptyunlessyouconcernyourselfwithyouchildrenandgrandchildren.Inthatcaseyoumustrealizethatwhileyoucanstillrenderthemmaterialservices,suchasmakingthemanallowanceorknittingthemjumpers,youmustnotexpectthattheywillenjoyyourcompany.我认为对那些有强烈的非个人兴趣并投身其中的人而言，过一个满意的老年生活是容易的。在这一方面，长期的人生阅历是富有成效的，并且在这一领域由经验而生的智慧可以在没有太大强制压迫的情形下经由实践活动得以检验。对成长中的孩子，去告诉他们不要犯错误是没有用的；不但是因为他们不相信你，并且是因为犯错误是教育的重要构成部分。但是如果你发现自己是一个没有非个人兴趣的人，你会发现你的生命变得空虚除非你去关心自己的孩子和孙子们。在这种情形下，你会发现不管你继续给他们提供物质帮助，譬如生活补贴还是给他们编制衣服，你不要期望他们很乐意陪7.Someoldpeopleareoppressedbythefearofdeath.Intheyoungthereisajustificationforthisfeeling.Youngmenwhohavereasontofearthattheywillbekilledinbattlemayjustifiablyfeelbitterinthethoughtthattheyhavebeencheatedofthebestthingsthatlifehastooffer.Butinanoldmanwhohasknownhumanjoysandsorrows,andhasachievedwhateverworkitwasinhimtodo,thefearofdeathissomewhatabjectandignoble.Thebestwaytoovercomeit–soatleastitseemstome–istomakeyourinterestsgraduallywiderandmoreimpersonal,untilbitbybitthewallsoftheegorecede,andyourlifebecomesincreasinglymergedintheuniversallife.Anindividualhumanexistenceshouldbelikeariver–smallatfirst,narrowlycontainedwithinitsbanks,andrushingpassionatelypastrocksandoverwaterfalls.Graduallytherivergrowswider,thebanksrecede,thewatersflowmorequietly,andintheend,withoutanyvisiblebreak,theybecomemergedinthesea,andpainlesslylosetheirindividualbeing.Themanwho,inoldage,canseehislifeinthisway,willnotsufferfromthefearofdeath,sincethethingshecaresforwillcontinue.Andif,withthedecayofvitality,wearinessincreases,thethoughtofrestwillnotbeunwelcome.Ishouldwishtodiewhilestillatwork,knowingthatotherswillcarryonwhatIcannolongerdoandcontentinthethoughtthatwhatwaspossiblehasbeendone.有些老人对死亡感到害怕。年轻人有这种想法的话是正常的，他们会为可能在战争中阵亡感到痛苦，因为他们会感到被剥夺掉了生活会给予的美好的东西。但是对一个经历了生活的哀乐，和所有人生应当做的事情的老人而言，这种恐惧情绪是不幸的和没有必要的。对我而言，克服这种情绪的最好办法是：让自己的兴趣逐渐泛和非个人化，直到自我的障碍一点一点的消逝，个人的生命融入到大众的生活。个体生命的存在应当像一条河流——刚开始很小，狭隘的局限于自己堤岸，富有激情的冲过岩石和瀑布。慢慢的，河流开始变得宽阔，堤岸在消退，水流也变得平静(参见静水流深)，最后，没有明显的征兆，河流汇入了大海，毫无痛苦的结束了自己个体的存在。老年人能用这种方式来看待自己的生活的话，将不会经历死亡的恐惧，因为他关心的东西会延续。并且随着活力的减退和疲倦感的增多，希望能够长眠的想法不是不受欢迎的。我希望能够在工作的时候死去，知道别人会继续我的未竟事业，并且知道自己已经做了自己所能做的一切，我会感到很欣HOWTOGROWOLDByBertrandRussellTranslatedbyZhangXuan(jihuafeijiabcd@163.com)1.Inspiteofthetitle,thisarticlewillreallybeonhownottogrowold,which,atmytimeoflife,isamuchmoreimportantsubject.Myfirstadvicewouldbetochooseyourancestorscarefully.Althoughbothmyparentsdiedyoung,Ihavedonewellinthisrespectasregardsmyotherancestors.Mymaternalgrandfather,itistrue,wascutoffintheflowerofhisyouthattheageofsixty-seven,butmyotherthreegrandparentsalllivedtobeovereighty.OfremoterancestorsIcanonlydiscoveronewhodidnotlivetoagreatage,andhediedofadiseasewhichisnowrare,namely,havinghisheadcutoff。2.Agreatgrandmotherofmine,whowasafriendofGibbon,livedtotheageofninety-two,andtoherlastdayremainedaterrortoallherdescendants.Mymaternalgrandmother,afterhavingninechildrenwhosurvived,onewhodiedininfancy,andmanymiscarriages,assoonasshebecameawidow,devotedherselftowoman’shighereducation.ShewasoneofthefoundersofGirtonCollege,andworkedhardatopeningthemedicalprofessiontowomen.SheusedtorelatehowshemetinItalyanelderlygentlemanwhowaslookingverysad.SheinquiredthecauseofhismelancholyandhesaidthathehadjustpartedfromhistwotimeIpartedfromoneofthem,IshouldhaveadismalexistenceMadresnaturalehereplied.Butspeakingasoneoftheseventy-two,Ipreferherrecipe.Aftertheageofeightyshefoundshehadsomedifficultyingettingtosleep,soshehabituallyspentthehoursfrommidnightto3a.m.inreadingpopularscience.Idonotbelievethatsheeverhadtimetonoticethatshewasgrowingold.This,Ithink,isproperrecipeforremainingyoung.Ifyouhavewideandkeeninterestsandactivitiesinwhichyoucanstillbeeffective,youwillhavenoreasontothinkaboutthemerelystatisticalfactofthenumberofyearsyouhavealreadylived,stilllessoftheprobablebrevityofyoufuture.3.AsregardshealthIhavenothingusefultosaysinceIhavelittleexperienceofillness.IeatanddrinkwhateverIlike,andsleepwhenIcannotkeepawake.Ineverdoanythingwhateveronthegroundthatitisgoodforhealth,thoughinactualfactthethingsIlikedoingaremostlywholesome.4.Psychologicallytherearetwodangerstobeguardedagainstinoldage.Oneoftheseisundueabsorptioninthepast.Itdoesnotdotoliveinmemories,inregretsforthegoodolddays,orinsadnessaboutfriendswhoaredead.One’sthoughtsmustbedirectedtothefutureandtothingsaboutwhichthereissomethingtobedone.Thisisnotalwayseasy:one’sownpastisgraduallyincreasingweight.Itiseasytothinktooneselfthatone’semotionsusedtobemorevividthantheyare,andone’smindkeener.Ifthisistrueitshouldbeforgotten,andifitisforgottenitwillprobablynotbetrue.5.Theotherthingtobeavoidedisclingingtoyouthinthehopeofsuckingvigorfromitsvitality.Whenyourchildrenaregrownuptheywanttolivetheirownlives,andifyoucontinuetobeasinterestedinthemasyouwerewhentheywereyoung,youarelikelytobecomeaburdentothem,unlesstheyareunusuallycallous.Idonotmeanthatoneshouldbewithoutinterestinthem,butone’sinterestshouldbecontemplativeand,ifpossible,philanthropic,butnotundulyemotional.Animalsbecomeindifferenttotheiryoungassoonastheiryoungcanlookafterthemselves,buthumanbeings,owingtothelengthofinfancy,findthisdifficult.6.Ithinkthatasuccessfuloldageiseasiestforthosewhohavestrongimpersonalinterestsinvolvingappropriateactivities.Itisinthisspherethatlongexperienceisreallyfruitful,anditisinthisspherethatthewisdombornofexperiencecanbeexercisedwithoutbeingoppressive.Itisnousetellinggrown-upchildrennottomakemistakes,bothbecausetheywillnotbelieveyou,andbecausemistakesareanessentialpartofeducation.Butifyouareoneofthosewhoareincapableofimpersonalinterests,youmayfindthatyourlifewillbeemptyunlessyouconcernyourselfwithyouchildrenandgrandchildren.Inthatcaseyoumustrealizethatwhileyoucanstillrenderthemmaterialservices,suchasmakingthemanallowanceorknittingthemjumpers,youmustnotexpectthattheywillenjoyyourcompany.7.Someoldpeopleareoppressedbythefearofdeath.Intheyoungthereisajustificationforthisfeeling.Youngmenwhohavereasontofearthattheywillbekilledinbattlemayjustifiablyfeelbitterinthethoughtthattheyhavebeencheatedofthebestthingsthatlifehastooffer.Butinanoldmanwhohasknownhumanjoysandsorrows,andhasachievedwhateverworkitwasinhimtodo,thefearofdeathissomewhatabjectandignoble.Thebestwaytoovercomeit–soatleastitseemstome–istomakeyourinterestsgraduallywiderandmoreimpersonal,untilbitbybitthewallsoftheegorecede,andyourlifebecomesincreasinglymergedintheuniversallife.Anindividualhumanexistenceshouldbelikeariver–smallatfirst,narrowlycontainedwithinitsbanks,andrushingpassionatelypastrocksandoverwaterfalls.Graduallytherivergrowswider,thebanksrecede,thewatersflowmorequietly,andintheend,withoutanyvisiblebreak,theybecomemergedinthesea,andpainlesslylosetheirindividualbeing.Themanwho,inoldage,canseehislifeinthisway,willnotsufferfromthefearofdeath,sincethethingshecaresforwillcontinue.Andif,withthedecayofvitality,wearinessincreases,thethoughtofrestwillnotbeunwelcome.Ishouldwishtodiewhilestillatwork,knowingthatotherswillcarryonwhatIcannolongerdoandcontentinthethoughtthatwhatwaspossiblehasbeendone.论变老罗素作张瑄译看题目，似乎我要讨论的是如何变老的问题，其实不然。我要谈的恰恰是如何避免变老。活到我现在但只要参看一下我的其他长辈就会发现我在这一方面还是比较成功的。我的外祖父的确是英年早逝，去世时只有六十七岁，但其他三位祖辈人无一没有超越八十岁的年龄。向上追溯，再远的长辈中未有长寿的，我只发现一位，而致使那位老人去世的疾病在当今时代是少之又少，名叫“砍头”。我的一位曾祖母曾与历史学家吉本相识，她活到了九十二岁，而且直到生命的最后一天仍然在子孙中保留着家长的威严。我的外祖母一生育有九个子女，另有一个幼年夭折，流产也有多次。外祖父去世后她把全部精力都投入到了女子高等教育的进步上。她是剑桥大学格腾女子学院的创始人之一，而且一直致力于在医药事业中为女性开辟一片天地。她曾经向我们讲过一件在意大利遇到的事情。当时她看到一位神情忧伤的老先生，就上前询问我十分欣赏她的做法。八十岁以后，她发现入睡十分困难，就养成了午夜到凌晨三点阅读科普读物的习惯。我相信她抽不出一丝闲暇来注意自己的衰老。这在我看来正是保持年轻的要诀。如果你还保留着广泛而浓更没有必要为未来短暂而感到惋惜。在健康方面我没有什么可以借鉴的经验，因为我没有多少得病的经历。我凭喜好吃喝，困意浓了就睡觉。我从来没有刻意地做过任何有益健康的事情，不过事实上我喜欢做的事情大多都裨益身体。思想上应当预防两种情况。其一就是无休止的沉浸在过去当中。一味的回忆，为过去的那些美好时光而惋惜，为逝去的友人而神伤，对于我们，这是不应该的。人的思想应该指向未来，指向那些仍然有待处头脑也更加敏锐。如果这是事实，那么最好将它忘记；现在忘记，将来回想，很可能它就不再是事实了。危险之二是对年轻人过分亲近，奢望能从他们身上夺取一些青春的气息。子女成年后都希望有自己的生活，如果你对他们还保留着与他们成年之前一样的关爱，那么除非你的子女对此异常冷漠，否则你将会成为他们的一种负担。我并不是说不应当对他们保留关爱，但这种关爱应当保留在思想中，或者力所能及态度就会变得冷漠；但人类幼年时间过于漫长，这使得这种情感很难淡化。如果我们能够对人以外的事物抱有浓厚的兴趣，而且能够因这种兴趣而进行适当活动的话，老年时光出的智慧能够得到运用，同时不会让人感到自己盛气凌人。告诉成年的子女不要犯错是没有任何用处的，因为其一他们不会听从，其二错误本身就是教育的一个重要组成部分。但如果你是一个对其它事物提不起兴趣的人，你会发现一旦停止对子女，以及他们子女的关心，生活就会变得空虚。这样的话你需要使自己意识到即使你可以为他们提供一些物质帮助，例如给他们些钱或者替他们织件毛衣，你也不能奢求他们喜欢你的陪伴。有些老年人由于恐惧死亡而心情抑郁。这种情绪对年轻人来说无可厚非。即将奔赴战场的年轻人，他们有理由害怕牺牲；生命的礼物还没有得到就被命运骗去，感到痛苦也情有可原。但是，对于一个老人，已经饱经人生喜乐而又完成了力所能及的事业，恐惧死亡就显得可悲甚至可鄙了。缓解这种情绪的最好方最终你的生命融入到万物当中。人的存在应当像是河流——最初涓涓细流，限制在狭窄的两岸之间，欢快的穿过岩石，跨越瀑布。渐渐的，两岸后退，河道变宽，河水也安静下来。最终，没有任何停留的迹象，它们融入大海，没有任何痛苦地失去了个体的存在。能够这样看待生命的人年老时就不会为死亡而恐惧，因为他知道他关心的事物会继续存在。而且，如果随着生命力的消逝，疲惫的感觉增加，那么将死亡视为Enya，1989年成军，全球唱片销量超过2500万张，在世界各地成声音表情强烈的影子。NeverGrowOld---byTheCranberriesIhadadreamStrangeitmayseemItwasmyperfectdayOpenmyeyesIrealizeThisismyperfectdayHopeyounevergrowoldHopeyounevergrowoldHopeyounevergrowoldHopeyounevergrowoldDo-do-do-do…BirdsintheskyTheylooksohighThisismyperfectdayIfeelthebreezeIfeelateaseItismyperfectdayHopeyounevergrowoldHopeyounevergrowoldHopeyounevergrowoldHopeyounevergrowoldForeveryoungIhopeyoustayForeveryoungDo-do-do-do---byTheCranberriesYou'resoprettythewayyouareYou'resoprettythewayyouareAndyouhavenoreasontobesoinsolenttomeYou'resoprettythewayyouareLove,loveYousayyouwantitButyouwon'tchangemeLove,loveYousayyouwantitButyouwon'tchangeYou'resoprettythewayyouareYou'resoprettythewayyouareAndyouhavenoreasontobesoinsolenttomeYou'resoprettythewayyouareLove,loveYousayifyouwantitButyouwon'tchangemeLove,loveYousayifyouwantitButyouwon'tchangemedmiddle-ageisacrucialperiodandmiddle-agedwomenarefacingevenmoredangers.youthisstilllingeringonthere,butitcantstandanycarelessnessornegligence.stayingyouthcanbelikenedtoclimbingasteephill,whilenegligencewillleadtodecrepitudeovernight.thosewhofeedontheiryouthwillhavetooptotherwiseatthisstage.thisisatimefulloftemptations,alluringgirlsandglamourouswomenpopupeverywhere,makingthediscomposedmenconfusedanddisoriented,leavingbehindmoreandmorebroken-upfamiliesandabandonedwives,perfacialcare,hair-dressingoraerobicsareallnecessaryforwomen,buttheyareonlysuperficialandcannotlastlong.theycaninnowaydothecosmeticmake-upsround-the-clock..whatwillbecomeofthemafterremovingthecosmeticsfromtheirface?andtomakethemselvesmoreintellectuallypreparedtheyneedthesenseofsecuritytoo.wemaywellsaythatmensyouthliesintheircareerwhilewomensyouthreliesontheirstateofmindandcultivationbecauseoftheriseofyinandthedeclineofyang,wecanseemanycapablewomendevisingandcalculatingwithalltheirmight.theyusedtobeverybeautiful,andarenowstillcharming,buttheyaremiddle-agedafterall.howlongcantheystillpreservetheirdiminishingyouth?whatarethosewomenafter?money?butwilltheybehappyiftheyhavetocountthemoneywiththeirskinnyshriveledhandsaftertheyhavesuccessfullybecomewealthyoldladies?maybetheyareseekingforspacioushousesandlimousines.butthesearejusttoolstoserveus,justlikeamotorcycleisforustorideon,notforustocarryonourshoulders.isitstillworththepriceiftheirpursuithasbecomeaburdenorapressurethatcallsforthesacrificeoftheiryouth?ormaybetheyneedthemoneyfortheirchildrentostudyabroad.butstudyingabroadisnottheambitionofeveryone.aswealwayssaythatchildrenhavetheirownluck,weshouldntchoosethesamewayforthemtogrowup.doingbusinessorgoinginforpolitics,workingatcivilianpostsorasmilitaryofficialsaredifferentchoicesfordifferentchildren.someevenwanttobecomechessplayersanditissuchawonderfulcareerthatafterbecomingsuccessful,theycanmakeplayingchessarewardingprofession..whyshouldwetryourbesttosendourchildrenabroadwheretherearesomanyuncertainties?whatsthepointofthesacrificeofourpreciousyouthtosendourchildrentosomewherethatmaybeheaven,orhell?weshouldbemoderateatseekingwealth,forthereisnolimitforit.abillionaireeatsnomorethanthreemealsadayandsleepsinonebedatnightwhileafamilylivingonameagersalarycanbeveryhappyandhealthy.wemayfeelsometimesthattheluxuriousbeijingroastduckisnomoredeliciousthanthesimplepancakeswithshallots.onlywhentheykeepapeacefulheartcantheyfacebothfavorsandhumiliationswithcomposure.whatdothemiddle-agedwomenneedinordertomaintaintheiryouthanddoomeddecrepitude?finequalitiesandgoodmanners,confidenceandcalmness.dontdotoomuchextrawork,donttireyourselvesout,andnevertryanythingbeyondyourcapacityandenergy.whatsmore,theyneedsecurityandfriendship.nomatterhowstrongamanis,heneedssupport;nomatterhowindependentawomanis,sheneedsbacking.theflowerygirlsmaycareaboutnothingbutamusement,andtheymaynotconsidereventhereliabilityandcapabilityofaman.middle-agedwomen,however,aremuchmorepractical,andtheyhavetofacetheloyaltyandcreativityofaman.whattheyareseekingisthemostloyal,themostresponsible,themostpowerful,themostreliableandthemosttrustworthylovewhichisnearlyeternalandunchangeable.anykindofstrikemaywearawaytheiryouthwhichisoncegonenevertoreturn.middle-agedwomenmustkeepaclearheadinsteadofdoingthingsoutofwillfulness.theyshouldbeabletojudgewhoissincereandwhoishypocritical.oncetheychoosethehypocriticalinsteadofthesincereoutofcarelessness,tragedywilldefinitelyfallonthem.infact,onewhimmaydecidewhethertheywillliveinheavenorstayinhell.allwomenhaveoneweakpoint—theyareeasilyenchantedbymensflattery.thererenumeroussweet-tonguedmen,butloyalonesarehardtofind.theymayusesweetwordstoflatteryouortheymaybesoft-spokenandsubmissive,butthatiswhentheyareweakandinneedofhelp.assoonasthesituationisdifferent,theymaychangeimmediately.wealwaysthinktheweakisthereliable,butthisis