《三笑三国》英语话剧

第第页《三笑三国》

旁白—黄丽清赵云—欧日斌曹操—周会军夏侯敦—罗靖慧蒋干—黄忠丽刘备—杨爱荣诸葛亮—申海怡张飞—刘汝强道具：一坨布（代表阿斗）、枪（剑）。

开场介绍

Ladies

and

gentlemen,let

me

introduce

the

actors.

The

first

is

ZhaoYun,he

is

the

mostlyactor

today.And

his

black

brotherisZhangFei

,and

there

bossis

LiuBei

.Don't

forget

the

other

side

Mr

Cao,and

his

adviser

JiangGan,and

the

most

strong

XiaHou

Dun.At

last,Don't

forget

who

behind

the

scenes

MEthe

Director.

第一幕：人物，赵云

夏侯敦

曹操

蒋干

旁白：就在刚才不久，一个黑大汉从曹操军中救出刘备之子刘阿斗，现在正向这里杀过来，他就是张飞！！！（赵云出场）Not

too

long

ago,a

black

general

saved

the

son

of

LiuBei

-Liu

A

Dou.now,he

is

coming.

His

name

is

ZhangFei.

赵云：no！本人姓赵名云，乃常山子龙也！

no!

my

family

name

is

Zhao

my

middle

name

is

Yun

and

my

given

name

is

ZiLong

~

（赵云从背后拿出一坨布，代表阿斗）

赵云：看！这就是主公的最后一点骨血！刘阿斗！我从火场之中把他救出，而我自己的脸却早已……唉……化作焦炭！（顾影自怜状）Look!

this

is

the

last

blood

of

the

boss

!

Liu

aDou

.

Ittook

him

out

from

the

fire

,but

my

face

hasalreadyturnedintocoke

...ai

~.

（夏侯敦挺着枪呈猫腰状杀出）

夏侯敦：小贼，莫跑，要不然我就大开杀戒了（冲到）hey，

guy!stop

there

or

I

will

kill

you

.

（赵云左手抱阿斗，右手与之搏斗）

赵云：可恶！居然敢偷袭我！fuck,!!

you

bitch

dare

to

attack

me

??

（二人装腔作势打斗数招）

赵云：看我九阴白骨爪！！stop!!

wait!!!

one

two

three...

nine

dark

white

bone

fingers!!

夏侯敦：唔！（倒地）

oh

my

gad

I'm

over

.赵云：此地不宜久留，还是快去寻主公！（下）yeah~

guy!

I

will

go

to

look

for

my

boss

,

goodbye~

（曹操、蒋干二人上）

曹操：没想到我们初次出兵便杀得敌人望风而逃！真可谓出师未捷身先死。长使英泪满襟！

I

didn't

expect

that

we

can

beat

the

enemy

with

our

first

attack.

It

reminds

me

of

a

poem,

"Dead

Before

the

Ship

Even

Sank.

Long

the

hero

Tearful"

蒋干：丞相，您说这话，真不见得怎么吉利。

Prime

minister,It

does

not

sound

good

about

what

you

have

said.（曹操险些被地上的夏侯敦绊倒）

曹操：咦？这是谁扔的西瓜皮？（转身，看见倒在地上的夏侯敦）Huh?

Who

threw

the

banana

rind?

曹操：是夏侯爱卿。难道他又在搞什么行为艺术?

XiaHou

Dun?

Is

he

engaged

in

what

somethingaboutperformance

art?

（蒋干上前将夏侯敦一顿拍打，二人站起）

曹操：夏侯爱卿为何要在地上装西瓜皮？？Why

do

you

want

to

install

banana

rind

on

the

ground?

夏侯敦：有一人脸如黑炭

手抱孩子A

very

black

people

with

baby

in

his

band

.

蒋干：是敌人的保姆！还带个孩子！！！it

Is

enemy's

maid

with

a

child

in

his

arm.

曹操：那你呢？What

did

you

do?

夏侯敦：I

II……

I

rushed

to

him

and

fight

with

him.I’mfighting

fighting

fighting!!我

我……

我冲上去与之打斗

打

打

打

曹操：然后呢？What

then?

蒋干：丞相，看来是夏侯敦将军杀退了敌人！

Prime

minister,

it

is

likely

that

general

Houdun

has

defeated

the

enemy

.

夏侯敦：唔唔！ZhaoYunusedhisninedarkwhitebonefingerstome!Iwassofearful.赵云用他的九阴白骨爪对付我，我好害怕！（手势如下：指指门外，右手作“九”的样子，随即作全身发冷状，然后指向自己的衣服，再指向曹操，作爪击状）

曹操：然后呢？

Then

what

happened?

夏侯敦：No！No

！No！

I

was

defeated

he

used

the

nine

cloud

white

bone

finger

,it's

so

terrible

（曹操、蒋干二人将夏侯敦拉起）

曹操：如此看来，敌人应该还没有走远。咱们乘胜追击！（慷慨状）It

seems

that

the

enemy

should

not

go

far.

Let's

run

after

them.

蒋干：有时候我真的很佩服丞相您这乐观的心理……（赞同状）

Sometimes

I

really

admires

prime

minister

very

much

about

your

optimistic

psychology

夏侯敦：Yes!Fighting,Fighting!Let’sgo!好！打！打！上啊！（抡起两拳，作欲与敌人搏斗状）

（三人下）

第二幕:人物：刘备

张飞

诸葛亮

赵云

（刘备、张飞、诸葛亮三人上）

旁白：这是的刘备一行人正在军营外观看敌情~~~LiuBeiand

his

team

are

looking

something

out

of

his

military

camp.

（诸葛亮走在前面，张飞、刘备二人紧跟其后）

诸葛亮：（转头）主公啊，按理说是您走先啦！（恭敬状）Mymaster,you

should

walk

in

front

of

us!

Is

not

it?

刘备：不啦，军师您身后有好大块荫凉，躲在这里避避暑也不错。No，it's

very

cool

that

I

stand

just

behind

you，I

can

avoid

summer

heat

.

诸葛亮：（眺望状）主公，如果我所料不错，现在马上就要下雨了！Oh!Mymaster,come

here!

I

tell

you

a

secret!

I

think

it

is

about

to

rain!

刘备：先生神算！人所不及！不知先生如何知道将要下雨？great

prediction！No

one

can

compare

with

you！just

wonder

how

do

you

know

it's

going

to

rain？

诸葛亮：首先，天气预报说今天有雨；其次，（以手指前方）看天，那边有一块黑云。First,the

weather

report

told

us

it

is

going

to

rain

today;second,look

at

the

sky,so

many

dark

clouds

are

coming!

旁白：BythistimeZhaoYundesperatelyrunfromthefront.ZhangFeibecomesoexcitedatthismoment.这时候赵云从前方拼命地赶过来。张云变得很兴奋。这时候（赵云上）

张飞：哇！那就是子龙啊，想不到这一会不见子龙就换了个新桌面。夏侯敦：我靠，又一个黑人，黑人都是很牛x的，我怕了。

black

man

come

again

，

Blacks

are

very

powerful，I'm

fearful.曹操：阁下是何人，何以竟有如此美妙的声音！Excuse

me.

May

I

know

your

name?

What

a

wonderful

voice

you

have!

张飞：我便是那燕（yān）人张翼德！（咬牙）I

am

Zhang

YiDe

from

NaYan!

(clenches

teeth)

（咬牙切齿的样子）曹操：阉人？？原来只是一个太监……夏侯敦，上去解决他！

You

are

the

so

called

coward,aren't

you?HouDun,beat

him!

（夏侯敦低头猫腰冲出）

夏侯敦：唔！唔~唔！

（二人打在一起）旁白：真是厉害的车轮战啊，这时候夏侯已经被张飞打得狼狈不堪了。IsreallyfierceCheLunZhanah!Atthistime,XiaHouDunhasbeenZhangFeiplayedindisorder.（定格）

蒋干：丞相，这一仗咱们必输，一会还有桥断水倒流呢！快叫夏侯将军下来吧。

Prime

minister,

we

must

have

lose

this

Campaign

,

the

bridge

will

also

cut

off

the

water

soon!Let's

call

XiaHouDun

general

to

get

down

quickly.

曹操：你怎么知道？How

do

you

know

it?

蒋干：《真三国无双叁》，长坂的任务啊！！

"Really,it

is

the

game's

duty

of

Three

countries

Unparalleled

Three"!!

曹操：干啊，我看你是太沉迷于网络游戏了。这样既浪费时间又上海身体，你还是听为丞相的一句话吧！珍爱生命，远离三俗啊！

I

think

you

are

too

addicted

to

online

games.

What

a

waste

of

time,

and

It's

harmful,listen

to

me

,You

must

take

good

care

of

yourself.

（张飞与夏侯敦二人继续，张飞一枪击中夏侯敦）

夏侯敦：oh

!my

gad

!

I

am

over

again.又被打败了

（蒋干上前将夏侯敦拖回）曹操：唉，如今这世道变了，太监都这么厉害啦！？

Nowtheworldhaschanged.Why

does

that

coward

become

so

brave?

张飞：曹贼听着！今日汝等必不能生过此桥！

CaoCao

,!Shutup!

Listentome!Today

you

all

can't

pass

this

bridge

with

a

live

one!

曹操：汝休得猖狂！今日要不是我手下典韦身死，许诸拉稀，于禁肺炎，李典麻疹，文聘肝癌，张辽痔疮，才不会输给你！shut

up!If

general

DianWei

was

still

alive,We

would

not

be

defeated!

张飞：你手下终究无人可用！啊，面对此景次请，我真想赋诗一首——Nobody

may

go

to

battle

for

you

,Facing

this

scenery,I

really

want

to

sing

a

song.er,

on

On

（音乐起）only

you

~~~~~only……you……

（夏侯敦跃起）

夏侯敦：唔唔唔……（以手捂耳，跑下）It’sveryunpleasanttohear!太难听了！

曹操：啊！Help!（惨厉的叫声，并以手捂耳）

蒋干：啊！Itissimply,makethegodscry!简直是惊天地，泣鬼神啊！（惨厉的叫声，并以手捂耳）

曹操：这难道就是传说中的门得尔松的c大调《鬼叫》协奏曲！何以如此震撼！（惊惶状）Why

is

this

so

shocking!

Itseems,reallybeatm