专题六写作-读后续写

专题六写作第二节一一■读后续写.把脉考情明考向.知规律新高考命题探究一一以浙江卷3年高考为例一项目卷别写作文体命题类型材料词数主题范围2020-模拟卷叙事类记叙文半开放330人与自我・我和流浪狗的故事2018年6月故事类记叙文半开放类320人与自我・父亲带儿子去体验农场生活2017年11月故事类记叙文半开放类338人与自我・和父母一块去旅游的故事2017年6月故事类记叙文半开放类344人与自我・和朋友一起骑车游玩，野外遇到狼的故事2016年10月故事类记叙文半开放类332人与自我・野外游玩，女主人迷路在野外独自过夜的故事综合分析上表并结合最新考纲和2020年模拟卷，我们可以大胆预测2020年新高考读后续写会有以下命题特征：.写作文体写作文体仍然会继续考查叙事类文体，所选材料一定具有更强的故事性、逻辑性・・・・・的特点。.命题形式要求考生依据所给材料内容和段落开头语进行续写（150词左右），将其发展成一篇与给定材料有逻辑衔接、情节和结构完整的短文。所给的段落提示句均是故事情节发展的过程句，对续写故事的发展有提示、引导和限制作用。明年续写部分的设置会更合理，这样才能更好地激发学生的想象力，学生都有话可说，有内容可写。.主题范围主题范围将仍然围绕人与自我、人与社会、人与自然三大主题，内容来自学生的・・・・ ・・・・ ・・・・ ・・・实际生活或是学生关心的话题。续写话题将会更加彰显人性光辉，体现人与自然••••・・・・・・・和谐相处的文章出现的可能性非常大，因为这样的文章更适合考查学生的逻辑思维、评判性思维和创新思维能力。I真题再做北能力.知不足A阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。续写的词数应为150左右。（2020•模拟卷）Thoughitisoneofthefadedmemoriesofmylifetoday,therearetimeswhenIrememberhisfaceclearly,especiallyhiseyes.AshehadyellowspotsonhiseyeswecalledhimSpotty.Hewouldhavebeenastray前浪）dog,untilhecametome.Iwassevenyearsold.MydadhadjustgotanewjobinNasik.Wehadmovedintoarentedhouse.Itwasrainingveryheavilyonthedaywemoved.Itwasacolddarknight.Wehadourmealandwenttosleep.SomehowinthemidnightIheardsomestrangesoundsoutsidethemaindoor.IgatheredcourageandlookedoutthroughthewindowandIwasreallyamusedwithwhatIsawoutside.Therewasasmallpuppylyingonanolddoormatwhichmymotherhadputoutsidethedoor.Itwaswetandtrembling.Atfirstitwasdifficulttoseethelittleone.Itwastheyellowspotsonitseyesthatmademerealizeitspresence.ItwastryingtogetunderthedoormattoavoidthecoldairoutsideandithadmanagedtogetinasIcouldseeonlyitsheadoutsidethedoormat.Wasitsickorinjured?Ifeltpityforthepoorsoul.Iwentinandcameoutwithanoldtowel.Iwentneartheinnocentoneandhelditinmyhandandwipedthepuppytillhehadbecomedry.Itookhimintomyroomandmadeabedforhimwithawoolenblanketandasmallpillow.Heseemedveryhealthyandcomfortableinhisnewbedashewenttosleepimmediately.Thenextmorning,everyoneinthefamilycametoknowabouttheunusualguest."Shallwekeephimwithus?”Iquestionedmymom.Likeanyotherparentswould,myparentsfirsttotallyrefusedmyideabutmysisterandIconvincedthemtokeepSpotty.SlowlySpottygotonwitheveryoneandbecameoneofthefamilymembers.Paragraph1：DayspassedonandoneeveningwhenSpottyreturnedfromhislongwalk,heappearedveryexhausted.Paragraph2：Almostayearlater,onemidnightweheardSpottybarkingbreathlessly.【参考范文】Paragraph1：Dayspassed__on_and_one__evening_when__Spotty_returned__fromhislongwalk,heappearedveryexhausted.Hecametomyroomandsatnearme.ItwasthenthatIsawhishindlegwasinjuredandwasbleeding.Icalledoutmymotherandshequicklytiedabandagearoundhislegandgavehimfoodtoeat.Iwasveryupset.Butthenextday,Spottywasuptohisusualpranksthoughhelimpedabit.AfterthisincidentmyrelationwithSpottybecamemoreintense.Ireallyadmiredhimalotforhiscourage.Paragraph2：Almostayearlater,onemidnightweheardSpottybarkingbreathlessly.Wecameoutandsawthathewasbarkingcontinuouslyheadingsomewhere.AftersometimeSpottybecamequiet.Ipattedhimonhisbackandcameinside.Thenextdaymorning,myheartskippedabeatwhenIdidn,tseeSpotty.Isearchedforhimineachandeverycornerbuthewasnowhere.Andthistimehehadgoneandwouldnevercomeback.Icriedandwaitedforhim.Wewaitedforonelongweek.Buttherewerenosignsofhim.ThenonedaymyDadgottransferredtoMumbai.WeshiftedbacktoMumbai.WhatwouldhavehappenedtoSpotty?Wouldhehavedied?Theseweretheonlyquestionsinmymind,buttheyallremainedunansweredforever.B阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。（2018年6月.浙江高考）Itwassummer,andmydadwantedtotreatmetoavacationlikeneverbefore.HedecidedtotakemeonatriptotheWildWest.WetookaplanetoAlbuquerque,abigcityinthestateofNewMexico.WereachedAlbuquerqueinthelateafternoon.Uncle二Paul,mydad,sfriend,pickedusupfromtheairportanddroveusuptohisfarminPecos.HiswifeTinacookedusadeliciousdinnerandwegottoknowhissonsRyanandKyle.MydadandIspentthenightintheguestroomofthefarmhouselisteningtothefrogsandwaterrollingdowntherivernearby.Veryearlyinthemorning,UnclePaulwokeusuptohavebreakfast.“Thedaystartsatdawnonmyfarm，”hesaid.Afterbreakfast,IwenttohelpAuntTinafeedthechickens,whilemydadwentwithUnclePaultotakethesheepouttograze（吃草）1wasimpressedtoseemydadandUnclePaulridinghorses.Theylookedreallycool.Intheafternoon,IaskedUnclePaulifIcouldtakeahorseride,andhesaidyes,aslongasmydadwentwithme.Iwasn,tgoingtotakeahorseridebymyselfanyway.So,mydadandIputonournewcowboyhats,gotonourhorses,andheadedslowlytowardsthemountains.“Don,tbelateforsupper，”UnclePaulcried,“andkeeptothetracksothatyoudon,tget10st！”“OK！”mydadcriedback.AfterawhileUnclePaulandhisfarmhousewereoutofsight.Itwassopeacefulandquietandthecolorsofthebrownrocks,thedeepgreenpinetrees,andthelateafternoonsunmixedtocreateamagicscene.Itlookedlikeabeautifulwoven（编织的）blanketspreadoutuponthegroundjustforus.注意：1.所续写短文的词数应为150左右；.至少使用5个短文中标有下划线的关键词语；.续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好；.续写完成后，请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。Paragraph1：Suddenlyalittlerabbitjumpedoutinfront0fmyhorse.Paragraph2：Wehadnoideawherewewereanditwasgettingdark.【文章大意】父亲带儿子去西部荒野的一个朋友家喂鸡牧羊，体验农场生活，见父亲和叔叔骑马很是潇洒，儿子也很想骑，于是亲身上马体验……【写作指导】 第一段所给首句Suddenlyalittlerabbitjumpedoutinfrontofmyhorse.是故事发展的转折点，可从rabbit出现后带来的结果入手，可以写马受到惊吓狂奔而去，也可以写人的反应，无论从何角度拓展，需注意与续写第二段首句呼应。第二段首句Wehadnoideawherewewereanditwasgettingdark.呼应前文UnclePaul的叮嘱——不要耽误吃晚饭，可从如何寻路返回农场来写。已给提示词汇：dad，UnclePaul，farmhouse，river，feed，sheep，late，track，getlost，sight话题激活词汇：情感：panic，relief，nervous，worried；动作：run，cry，thinktooneself；环境：shower，mountain，forest，valley，tree，lake，sun【参考范文1】Paragraph1：Suddenlyalittlerabbitjumpedoutinfrontofmyhorse.DadandIfounditwassocutethatwedecidedtochaseit.Afterawhile,wewerecompletely10stintheforest.Therewasnothingleftinoursightbutthetrees."Wemaynotbeabletomakeitbacktothefarmhouseintimeforsupper.”Ithoughttomyself.Afteraseriesoffruitlessattemptstofindawayout,wefelthungryandtired.Paragraph2：Wehadnoideawherewewereanditwasgettingdark.Wegotstuckintheforest.Andanunexpectedshoweraddedtoourdifficultyinfindingawayhome,forallthetrackswehadmadedisappearedbecauseoftherain.Iwasalmostontheedgeofbreakingdownwhenmyfathersaid,“Don,tworry,myson.Irememberthereisarivernearthefarmhouse.Findtheriverandwewillbebackhome.”Finally,wefoundtheriverandgotbacktothehousealongit.Needlesstosay,weatealatedinner.【参考范文2】Paragraph1：Suddenlyalittlerabbitjumpedoutinfrontofmyhorse.MyhorseturnedtothelefttoavoidthelittlerabbitasIheldontightlyandtriednottofall.Thenmydadturnedaroundandshouted,“Holdon!”Allofasuddenthehorsebegantorun.Mydadtriedtokeepupbehindus.Forafewminutesmyhorsesloweddownandthenstoppedbesideariver.Ilookedaroundandrealizedthatwewereawayoffthetrack.Paragraph2：Wehadnoideawherewewereanditwasgettingdark.Luckilythestarscameoutandgaveusalittlelightwhenwewerelookingforthewaytothefarmhouse.Afterwhatmusthavebeenseveralhours,wesuddenlyheardthesoundofsheepinthedistance.MydadandIbothrodeourhorsestowardsthesoundofthesheep.AswegotcloserwesawUnclePaulwithaflashlightwavingusover.Whatanight!C阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。（2017年11月.浙江高考）AVacationwithMyMotherIhadaninterestingchildhood:Itwasfilledwithsurprisesandamusements，allbecauseofmymother-loving，sweet，yetabsent-mindedandforgetful.OnestrangefamilytripwetookwhenIwaseleventellsalotabouther.MytwosetsofgrandparentslivedinColoradoandNorthDakota,andmyparentsdecidedtospendafewweeksdrivingtothosestatesandseeingallthesightsalongtheway.Asthefirstdayofourtripapproached,David,myeight-year-oldbrother,andIunwillinglysaidgood-byetoallofourfriends.Whoknewifwe,deverseethemagain?Finally,themomentofourdeparturearrived,andweloadedsuitcases,books,games,campingequipment,andatentintothecarandbravelydroveoff.Webravelydroveoffagaintwohourslaterafterwe,dreturnedhometogetthepurseandtraveler,schecksMomhadforgotten.DavidandIwerealwaysalittlenervouswhenusinggasstationbathroomsifMomwasdrivingwhileDadslept:“Youstandoutsidethedoorandplaylookout（放哨）whileIgo,andI,llstandoutsidethedoorandplaylookoutwhileyougo."Ihadterriblepicturesinmymind:“Honey,wherearethekids?”“What?!Oh,Gosh...Ithoughttheywerebeingawfullyquiet."Wewereneveractuallyleftbehindinastrangecity,butweweren,tabouttotakeanychances.Onthefourthorfifthnight,wehadtroublefindingahotelwithavacancy.Afterdrivinginvainforsometime,Momsuddenlygotagreatidea:Whydidn'twefindahousewithalikely-lookingbackyardandaskifwecouldsetuptentthere?DavidandIbecamenervous.Toourgreatrelief,Dadturneddowntheidea.Momnevercouldunderstandourobjections.Ifastrangefamilyshoweduponherfrontdoorstep,Momwouldhavebeendelighted.Shethinkseveryoneintheworldisasniceassheis.Wefinallyfoundavacancyinthenexttown.注意：1.所续写短文的词数应为150左右;.至少使用5个短文中标有下划线的关键词语;.续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好;.续写完成后，请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。Paragraph1:Thenextdaywerememberedthebrand-newtentwehadbroughtwithus.Paragraph2：Wedrovethroughseveralstatesandsawlotsofgreatsightsalongtheway.【文章大意】童年总是充满惊喜和欢乐，皆因母亲可爱又迷糊健忘的性格。出发两小时后又返回家中，因为妈妈忘了钱包等。兄弟俩对母亲的粗心大意可谓是心有余悸，生怕妈妈把他们落在加油站的厕所里独自上路，以至于上厕所要轮流“放哨”。妈妈是善良的，自然认为所有人都和自己一样善良，所以在找不到有空房的酒店时，妈妈提议去别人的院子里搭帐篷。兄弟俩很紧张，还好爸爸否决了这个提议。最终一家人还是住进了酒店……【写作指导】Paragraph1的开头是“第二天，我们想起了我们带来的崭新的帐篷”。本段开头给考生提供了广阔的想象空间。既然记起了帐篷，那么可以围绕帐篷展开段落，可以体现母亲的“健忘”，也可突出母亲的“善良”，落脚点放在一些比较有趣的事上，与第一段中的surpriseandamusements呼应。Paragraph2的开头是“我们开车经过了好几个州，沿途看到了许多风景名胜”。与前文“意外不断”不同，本段画风突变，转而写风景，续写可往心情愉悦的方面写。此处可以用一些描述景色环境的表达来烘托氛围，最终可把故事的落脚点放在“亲情，生活的乐趣，母亲的趣事”等方面。已给提示词汇：absent-minded，forgetful，trip，David，camping，tent，Mom，Dad，trouble，nice话题激活词汇：情感：happy，glad，wonderful，terrific，great；动作：laugh，smile；交通、旅行：drive，pullover，setthebrake，setout，setoff，trip，journey；环境：scenery，mountain，range，valley，river，lake，forest，sun，wind，blow【参考范文1】Paragraph1：Thenextdaywerememberedthebrand-newtentwehadbroughtwithus.Butthenwewerehalfanhourawayfromthehotel，wherethetentwasleftbehind.Dadrecommendedbuyinganewone，whileMominsistedonourgoingbacktofetchit，saying，”Forgetfulpeoplelikememaylosethingsrepeatedly，soit’sunwisetogiveupthetent."Finally,wegotbackthetentandhittheroadagain.IfMomhadn,tbeenthatabsent-minded,itwouldhavesavedusthetroubleofgoingbackagainandagain.Paragraph2：Wedrovethroughseveralstatesandsawlotsofgreatsightsalongtheway.Oneday,towardsevening,wefoundagreatcampingsiteatthefootofahighmountain.DavidandIhelpedDadputupthetent,andMomwasbusypreparingsupper.Whenthesettingsuncastanorangelightoverthemountains,thetentwassetupandthemealwasready.Sittingaroundthecampfire,wetalkedandlaughed.EverytimewementionedthefunnyincidentsofthejourneyapleasantsmilewouldspreadoverMom,sface.【参考范文2】Paragraph1：Thenextdaywerememberedthebrand-newtentwehadbroughtwithus.Toourdelight,Momgaveuptheideaofcampinginsomestranger,sbackyard.Instead,wefoundawonderfulcampingsiteinthewild.Itwasaclearinginthewoodsbyasmalllake,whereDadcouldcatchsomefishfordinner.Wehadnotroublesettingupourtent,butweweredisappointedtofindthatMomforgottopackuppillows.Needlesstosay,weallwokeupwithasoreneckthenextmorning.Paragraph2：Wedrovethroughseveralstatesandsawlotsofgreatsightsalongtheway.Itwasafantastictrip.Wecrossedbigriversandvastplains,climbedhighmountains,andoverlookeddeepvalleys.Duringthetrip,Mom,sbeingabsent-mindednotonlygotusintomuchtrouble,butalsogaveusmanyfunnymoments.Butluckily,shewasnotsoforgetfulastoleavemeandDavidbehindinthegasstationbathrooms.Weallarrivedatgrandparents,homesafeandsound.D阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。（2016年10月・浙江高考）OneweekendinJuly,Janeandherhusband,Tom,haddriventhreehourstocampovernightbyalakeintheforest.Unfortunately,onthewayanunpleasantsubjectcameupandtheystartedtoquarrel.Bythetimetheyreachedthelake,JanewassoangrythatshesaidtoTom,“I'mgoingtofindabetterspotforuSandcampwalkedaway.Withnopathtofollow,Janejustwalkedonforquitealongtime.Aftershehadclimbedtoahighplace,sheturnedaround,hopingtoseethelake.Tohersurprise,shesawnothingbutforestand,farbeyond,asnowcappedmountaintop.Shesuddenlyrealizedthatshewaslost.“Tom!”shecried.“Help!”Noreply.IfonlyshehadnotlefthermobilephoneinthatbagwithTom.Janekeptmoving,butthefarthershewalked,themoreconfusedshebecame.Asnightwasbeginningtofall,Janewassotiredthatshehadtostopforthenight.Lyingawakeinthedark,JanewantedverymuchtobewithTomandherfamily.Shewantedtoholdhimandtellhimhowmuchshelovedhim.Janeroseatthebreakofday,hungryandthirsty.Shecouldhearwatertrickling^落）somewhereatadistance.Quicklyshefollowedthesoundtoastream.Tohergreatjoy,shealsosawsomeberrybushes.Shedrankandateafewberries.Neverinherlifehadshetastedanythingbetter.Feelingstrongernow,Janebegantowalkalongthestreamandhopeitwouldleadhertothelake.Asshepickedherwaycarefullyalongthestream,Janeheardahelicopter.Isthatforme?Unfortunately,thetreesmadeitimpossibleforpeopletoseeherfromabove.Afewminuteslater,anotherhelicopterflewoverhead.Janetookoffheryellowblouse,thinkingthatsheshouldgotoanopenareaandflagthemiftheycamebackagain.注意：1.所续写短文的词数应为150左右；.至少使用5个短文中标有下划线的关键词语；.续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好；.续写完成后，请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。Paragraph1：Butnomorehelicoptercameanditwasgettingdarkagain.Paragraph2：ItwasdaybreakwhenJanewokeup.【文章大意】主人公Jane和丈夫去野营，途中发生争吵，Jane离开宿营地，导致迷路。她没带手机，又找不到归路，所以只能在森林里过了一个晚上。第二天她发现一条小溪，打算顺着小溪走，这时听到有直升机的声音，但是直升机没看到她……【写作指导】根据第一段的首句可知，本段应该描述当天晚上Jane的心态和行动。而根据第二段的提示句可知，本段主要叙述Jane最终是如何获救的。当然，在续写中，一定要反映出Jane的坚韧和聪明，同时，最后一定要有Tom努力救援的信息，这样的续写故事结尾才有正能量。已给提示词汇：Jane，Tom，lake，walk，climb，atadistance，stream，tohergreatjoy，helicopter，yellowblouse话题激活词汇：环境：forest，stream，rock，berry，valley，steep，cave，lake，waterfall；困难：hunger，starve，thirsty，injure，broken，blood，panic，shelter，survive，suffer，cold，severe；活动：walk，climb，fall，crawl，taste，attempt，struggletoone,sfeet，makeone,swayto，pickup；情绪：toone’sgreatjoy，break~。亚口；救援：rescueteam，doctor，searchfor，spot；意志品质：calm，courage，will；评价：amazing，makeit【参考范文1】Paragraph1：Butnomorehelicoptercameanditwasgettingdarkagain.Sheknewthatshedidn'tdaretostayhereforalongtimebecausemaybethereweresomedangerousanimalsintheforest.Soshecontinuedtoclimb.Tohergreatjoy，shehadsomewatertodrinkandsomewildfruittoeatthere.Afterthat，ittookherthreehourstowalkintheforestalongthelake.Feelingverytired,shesoonfellasleep.Paragraph2：ItwasdaybreakwhenJanewokeup.Shebegantothinkawaytosaveherself.First,shefoundagoodplacenearbythelake,whereshecouldbefoundwithheryellow blouse.Forthreehours,nohelicopters.Then,shethoughtofaspecialwayshehadlearnedinherfirstaidclass.Maybeitwasfirethatcoulddrawthehelicopter'sattention.Thenshemadeafireandbeforelongahelicopterappearedaboveintheskyandtherescuingteamtogetherwithhishusband,Tom,cametosaveher.【参考范文2】Paragraph1：Butnomorehelicoptercameanditwasgettingdarkagain.Janewassotired,hungry,andextremelyfrightened.Shethoughttoherself,“IfonlyIhadnotquarrelledwithTom.WhereisTom?Hemusthavemadetheemergencycall.WhatIneedisenoughcourage.IfIcontinuemyspiritstomorrow,Iwillbelikelytoguidethehelicopter.”Lyingbesidethestream,shefellasleepverysoon.Suddenly,sheheardtheshoutsoftigers,whichmadeherscaredtodeath.Aftersheheldherbreathforafewminutes,everythingwasquietagain.Intheterribledarkness,shesleptagain.Paragraph2：ItwasdaybreakwhenJanewokeup.Shecaughtsightofafishermanatadistance,—with whosehelpsheclimbedtoanopenarea.To.her.great.joy,—ahelicopterflewoverheadjustatthatmoment.Thefishermanhelpedflagheryellowblousewildly.Thisdidcatchtherescuers,attention!Janewasrescued.SeeingTom,shetoldhimhowmuchshemissedhim.Neverwouldtheybeawayfromeachother.Tomgaveherthewarmestandlongesthugshehadeverreceived.I"枝遗点拨 析考法.通技法对于这种新的题型，考生首先要能对所给的文章有深刻的理解，对文章的脉络和发展的方向有很好的把握，对文章使用的词汇的特点有整体的认知。然后，根据对文章结构的理解设计合理的情节，完成对文章的续写。因此，续写文章的关键是：.掌握所给文章的主旨意图及故事情节的发展方向这点至关重要。只有把握了文章的主旨意图，才能很好地完成续写。.正确理解故事的脉络线索和段落结构，设计续写内容的基本框架只有对原文的脉络线索和段落结构有正确的和深刻的理解，续写的内容才能和原文骨肉相连，契合紧密。.理清文章中的要点信息和逻辑关系确保续写的内容和原文要有逻辑上的一致性，并能回应原文的信息。.感知文章的用词特点以便使续写的内容在语言色彩上和所给文章保持一致。.注意语言的使用考试说明中非常明确地指出，写作中要准确使用语法和词汇，清楚、连贯地表达自己的意思。所以，在考虑文章结构的同时，一定要注意使用比较“高级”的词汇和语法结构。••••典例示范•••・原题呈现阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。（2017年6月.浙江高考）Onabright,warmJulyafternoon,MacHollan,aprimaryschoolteacher,wascyclingfromhishometoAlaskawithhisfriends.Oneofhisfriendshadstoppedtomakeabicyclerepair,buttheyhadencouragedMactocarryon,andtheywouldcatchupwithhimsoon.AsMacpedaled（骑行）alongalone,hethoughtfondlyofhiswifeandtwoyoungdaughtersathome.Hehopedtoshowthemthisbeautifulplacesomeday.ThenMacheardquickandloudbreathingbehindhim.“Man,that’sabigdog!”hethought.Butwhenhelookedtotheside,hesawinstantlythatitwasn,tadogatall,butawolf,quicklycatchingupwithhim.Mac,sheartjumped.Hefoundouthiscanofbearspray.Withonehandonthebars,hefiredthesprayatthewolf.Abrightredcloudenvelopedtheanimal,andtoMac'srelief,itfellback,shakingitshead.Butaminutelater,itwasbyhissideagain.ThenitattackedthebackofMac,sbike,tearingopenhistentbag.Hefiredatthewolfasecondtime,andagain,itfellbackonlytoquicklyrestartthechase（追赶）.Macwaspedalinghardnow.Hewavedandyelledatpassingcarsbutwascarefulnottoslowdown.Hesawasteepuphillclimbbeforehim.Heknewthatoncehehitthehill,he,dbeeasilycaughtupandthewolf,steethwouldbetearingintohisflesh.Atthismoment,PaulandBeckyweredrivingtheircarontheirwaytoAlaska.Theydidn,tthinkmuchofitwhentheysawtwocyclistsrepairingtheirbikeonthesideoftheroad.Abitlater,theyspottedwhatthey,too,assumedwasadogrunningalongsideamanonabike.Astheygotcloser,theyrealizedthatthedogwasawolf.Macheardalargevehiclebehindhim.Hepulledinfrontofitasthewolfwascatchingupfast,justadozenyardsawaynow.注意：1.所续写短文的词数应为150左右；.至少使用5个短文中标有下划线的关键词语；.续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好；.续写完成后，请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。Paragraph1：Thecarabruptlystoppedinfront0fhim.Paragraph2：Afewminuteslater,theothertwocyclistsarrived.写作指导第一步：快速浏览，读懂原文通读全文首先要解决好五个W和一个H的问题，即理清人物who,地点where,时间when,事件what,原因why及怎样发展how。理解这篇文章的五个W之后就能快速了解文章大意：Mac与好友一起骑行去阿拉斯加，路上同伴因修自行车落后，Mac独自一人前行，遇到狼的突袭，好一番搏斗，幸亏此时Paul和Becky两人开车经过，出手相救。至于如何发展(how)？这要看考生的想象力如何。►第二步：构思情节，谋篇布局布局谋篇的关键是利用好两方面的信息：.续写部分所给的两个段落的首句Thecarabruptlystoppedinfrontofhim.和Afewminuteslater,theothertwocyclistsarrived。这两句话起到非常关键的作用，无论从时间的先后、情节的发展都要以这两句话作为内在逻辑关系。.在情节的安排中，必须按照叙述的顺序，继续紧密结合原材料中五个W的逻辑顺序发展下去。(1)第一段写什么？应围绕PaulandBecky如何救助Mac展开，充分发挥丰富的想象，把Paul停车后如何在千钧一发之际拯救Mac的过程写得趣味横生又合乎情理。⑵第二段写什么？弄清楚开头的这两个人是谁很重要，然后依照符合故事情节发展的内在逻辑推进下去。朋友到达之后看到、听到并做了什么。最后应该提炼思想性和体现价值观的传递正能量的元素(如珍爱生命，学会合作或感激等)，以提升文章的档次。注意：第一段和第二段要衔接紧密，相互关联，不能独立存在。►第三步：理清逻辑，优化语言这一步侧重点为语言逻辑，词句结构都必须符合当时人狼大战的情景。续写时要按照情节的发展进行延续，写作手法上必须以叙为主，描写上以动作描写为重心，情节的发展合乎逻辑地推进。►第四步：以优美的文字誉写［阅卷名师点津］.内容方面在阅卷过程中发现，一部分考生没有读懂原文，如不认识bearspray,不理解abrightredcloudenvelopedtheanimal,没有理清人物关系，误认为Paul与Mac是好朋友：这部分考生由于阅读能力直接影响到续写的发挥。还有些考生描写心理活动和场景过多，缺乏具体描写，导致故事不够连贯，不够完整。.语言方面从评卷结果来看，考生出现的问题偏向于刻意追求运用高级、新颖的词汇，强行运用复杂句型等语法结构，而忽略了与原文语言环境的符合度和连贯度。同时出现了一些单词拼写错误等。更有甚者用套路作文，这与读后续写的全新创作宗旨相违背。.逻辑方面(1)违背生活真实。如在紧张的人狼大战环境下，有的考生却写两人在拉家常。⑵人物关系混乱。如增加了一些人物，让故事变得更加复杂；把Paul与Mac看成是原先认识的；有些故事的结局并没有交代如何处理狼。⑶两段的开头语理解不到位，以及两段之间衔接不够，也带来了很多故事上的混乱。比如第一段的Thecarabruptlystoppedinfrontofhim，学生理解为是Mac要求他停车等。.其他问题阅卷中发现很多标点错误，以下几点需注意：英语中没有顿号，分割句中并列成分多用逗号，如Sheslowly,carefully,deliberatelymovedthebox；英文的句号是实心点(.)；英文的省略号是三个点(…)，位置在行底。-•••专家点评【考场范文1】Paragraph1：Thecarabruptlystoppedinfrontofhim.Awomanhurriedlyopenedthedoorandstretchedoutherhand,shouting,“Getin!”Macgrabbedherhandwithouthesitation,leavinghisbicyclelyingontheroadandjumpedintothecar.Themomentheshutthedoor,hecaughttheglimpseofthefierceeyesandhungrylookofthewolfbythedoor.Acoldfeelingcreptoverhisheartandmadehimshiver.However,thecarhadleftthewolffarbehind,whichmadehimsighwithrelief.MacthankedPaulandBeckyandafterwardstheypulledoverbytheroadtowaitforMac,sfriends.Paragraph2：Afewminuteslater,thetwoothercyclistsarrived.Assoonastheymet,hisfriends'worriedlookfadedaway.“Wherehaveyoubeen?Wesawyourbicycleontheroad.”Hisfriendaskedandthesewordslikeapenetrateofsunshinewarmedhisheart.AfterMacexplainedtothem,theysaidfarewelltoPaulandBeckyinsincerelyindebtedness.Onthewayhome,nightbreezemadehimateaseandhecouldn,twaittosharehisexperiencewithhiswifeandchildrenandshowthekindnessoftheworld..这篇文章语言上最大的特色是用无生命特征的名词作句子的主语。整篇11个句子，其中无灵主语就有5句，占了42%。(1)Acoldfeelingcreptoverhisheartandmadehimshiver.(2)However,thecarhadleftthewolffarbehind,whichmadehimsighwithrelief.(3)Assoonastheymet,hisfriends,worriedlookfadedaway.(4)thesewordslikeapenetrateofsunshinewarmedhisheart.(5)Onthewayhome,nightbreezemadehimatease.这样，同样含义的句子就由平淡变得生动有力了。.语言上的第二大特色就是这篇文章词汇的使用，如indebtedness等于gratitude感激，pullover表达路边停车，这些都体现了较为深厚的语言功底。.但是，文章还是有些瑕疵。Macgrabbedherhandwithouthesitation,leavinghisbicyclelyingontheroadandjumpedintothecar.这一句中应将leaving改为left,使其与前面的grabbed及后面的jumped成为连贯动作，也可把jumped改为jumping同leaving平行成为grabbed的伴随状语；Hisfriendaskedandthesewordslikeapenetrateofsunshinewarmedhisheart.此句中的penetrate是个动词被错误地当作名词使用，可以改为Hisfriendaskedandthesewordslikearayofsunshinewarmedhisheart;AfterMacexplainedtothem,theysaidfarewelltoPaulandBeckyinsincerelyindebtedness.此句中的sincerely应该改为形容词修饰名词indebtednesso【考场范文2】Paragraph1：Thecarabruptlystoppedinfrontofhim.Mac,sheartjumpedwildly,andhedashedtowardsthecarwithouttheslightesthesitationforheknewitwashisonlychance.Itwasarealraceagainsttimetomakeit!Thankgod,Macsuccessfullymadethedooropenandthatfiercewolfwasjustaroundthecorner.TheinstantMacsettledhimontheseat,Paulstartedthecarinaflash.Thewolfhadtogiveupandfindanothergoal.Whatanarrowescape!Maccollapsedintotheseatandsmiledbitterly.Theothertwoguysdecidedtostopatthegasstationtohavearest.Paragraph2：Afewminuteslater,thetwoothercyclistsarrived.Seeinghisfriends,Macfeltagreatweighttakenoffhismind.HisfriendswereamazedatMac,sexperience,foritwasamiracletoescapefromahungrywolf!MacthankedPaulandBeckyagainandagain,buthisappreciationwasbeyondwords.Hesaidsincerely:“Youcan,timaginehowgratefulIwas,forIhavebeengivenasecondlife!”TearsgatheredupinMac,seyeswhenhewavedthemgoodbye.Itwasobviouslyanunforgettableexperience,andMacwouldhavealottosharewithhisfamilyafterhegothome.Itwashiscourageandotherpeople,skindnessthatsavedhim..从语言角度出发，这篇文章特征明显。.首先是语言地道，表现在三处for的使用：(1)Mac'sheartjumpedwildly,andhedashedtowardsthecarwithouttheslightesthesitationforheknewitwashisonlychance.(2)HisfriendswereamazedatMac,sexperience,foritwasamiracletoescapefromahungrywolf!(3)Youcan'timaginehowgratefulIwas,forIhavebeengivenasecondlife!句子中使用for更加符合英语的思维习惯，尽管前后是并列关系，但是前面提供了主要的信息，然后进行补充说明。如：因为李越出色的表现，校长授予他“本周学生之星”荣誉称号。在这句话中，汉语的思维是先说原因，而英语的翻译则是先说结果：ThepresidentawardedLiYuethetitleof“StarStudentoftheWeek”forwhatshedidforourclass原因和结果的位置是有很大差异的。.再者，此文章比较娴熟地使用了写作的各种技巧，如强调句的使用：Itwashiscourageandotherpeople'skindnesssatethim.感叹句的使用：(1)Youcan5timaginehowgratefulIwas!(2)Whatanarrowescape!等。.但是，这篇文章也存在一些不足。TheinstantMacsettledhimontheseat,Paulstartedthecarinaflash.此句中的him应该改为himself。第一段尾句Theothertwoguysdecidedtostopatthegasstationtohavearest.这句话与上下文脱节，起不到承上启下的作用，出现了情节逻辑的问题。.总的说来，该文章比较好地完成了读后续写的任务，既读懂了原文，又有比较好的语言功底将故事叙写下去。【考场范文3】Paragraph1：Thecarabruptlystoppedinfrontofhim.SeeingPaulwaveathimkindlyandopenthecardoorforhim，Macimmediatelyjumpedoutofhisbicycleandrushedintothecar.NosoonerthanthepoormanhadgotindidPaulclosethedoor.Thewolfwalkedaroundthecarandhowledfuriouslyatthem，butjustinvain.Realizingitcouldn'tcatchMacanymore，thewolfultimatelygaveupandwalkedawaygloomily.Watchingthewolfwasswallowedbytheroad,Mac，bathedinperspiration，sighedwithreliefandsankdowntothebackseat.Paulhandedhimabottleofwaterandhemanagedaweaksmile，murmuringsomethinglike“Thankyouverymuch”.Paragraph2：Afewminuteslater，theothertwocyclistsarrived.KnowingthatMachadbeenchasedbyawolf，theywerestumpedforwordsandparalysedwithfear.Fortunately，atthatmomentappearedPaulwholentahelpinghandtoMac.ThetwofriendsextendedtheirearnestgratitudetoPaulforrescuingMacandthentookMacbackhome.Aftersuchaterribleexperience，thesplendidlandscapeofAlaskaseemednolongertobeatemptationtothem.Onthewaybackhome，feelingthelightbreezethroughhishair，Macfeltwhathappenedjustnowwas