商务英语的文体

商务英语写作Chaptertwo

(BusinessEnglishStyle)商务书信的文体风格

好的商务写作应该体现出语言自然精练、行文流畅、可读性高的文体风格。商业书信的写作必须力求“自然”，不能满篇都是过时的商业行话可读性强自然一、简练的句子写（简练的句子的关键在于删除累赘的词语）1.删除重复的词语和词缀e.g.Ourreservesofoilarebecomingsmallerandsmaller.

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→Ourreservesofoilareshrinking.我们的石油储备在减少。Inaddition,wearealsoincludingacurrentpricelist.

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→Inaddition,weareincludingacurrentpricelist.此外，我们附上一份现行价目表。Theauditorsusuallyarriveunexpectedly,butwe'llbepreparednomatterwhentheauditorsarrive.

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→Theauditorsusuallyarriveunexpectedly,butwe'llbepreparednomatterwhentheyarrive.

审计员通常出人意料地到来，但我们不管他们什么时候来都会有准备。2.删除那些解释明白无误事实的词语

Inthecolorofblue可以简化为inblue。

intheyearof1995可以简化为in1995。

Intheintroductionatthebeginningintroduction导言都是在书的开头的，因此atthebeginning可删去。3.删除毫无内容的累赘词语Themoreyoubuy,theresultisthatasfarasmoneyisconcernedthemoreyouspend.

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→Themoreyoubuy,themoreyouspend.你买得越多就花钱越多。

（在这个句型中，第二部分就是表示结果，因此没有必要说theresultisthat。另外，spend暗含的意思就是“花钱”，所以不必要说asfarasmoneyisconcerned。）Intheeventthatyoucanattendthemeeting,planinadvancetooffersomeconcretesuggestionsonhowtoreducethecostandexpenseofovertimeintheOfficeServicesDepartment.

（在这个句子中有很多冗长的短语可以用更简短的词来表达，如：intheeventthat=if;planinadvance“plan”

本来就是指事先计划，因此inadvance（事先、预先）是多余的。Costandexpense在本句中是同义词，只用其一就够了。）

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→Ifyoucanattendthemeeting,plantooffersuggestionsonhowtoreduceovertimeexpenseintheOfficeServicesDepartment.如果你能参加会议，请计划提出如何削减办公室服务部开支的建议。4.将从句压缩成短语，短语压缩成单词Thereportthatdiscussedthefiscalcrisiswasreadbybusinessmen,whoshowedgreatinterest.

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→Thereportonthefiscalcrisiswasreadwithinterestbybusinessmen.商人们兴趣盎然地阅读了那份关于财政危机的报告。

（你可以看出来，修改后的句子是用一个介词短语onthefiscalcrisis来代替原句中的定语从句thatdiscussedthefiscalcrisis，从而省略了一个词。）Theemployeewithambitionisinallprobabilitylikelytogetresultsthataregood.

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→Theambitiousemployeeislikelytogetgoodresults.胸怀大志的雇员有可能获得好成绩。

（原句中的withambition被缩写成一个形容词ambitious，另外，inallprobability跟likely的意思一样，因此可以省略。）ThememothatwaswrittenbyMarygotlost.

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→ThememobyMarygotlost.玛丽写的备忘录丢了。

ThememowrittenbyMarygotlost.5.将定语从句改为前置定语（前置形容词）Thisamount,whichisconsideredtobeinsignificant,shouldbewrittenoffasabaddebt.

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→Thisinsignificantamountshouldbewrittenoffasabaddebt.这笔微不足道的金额应该作为坏账报废。。Theworkerswhoproducethemostwillreceivebonuses.

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→Themostproductiveworkerswillreceivebonuses.生产效率最高的工人会得到奖金。Lessthanhalfthemerchandisethatwasdamagedcouldbesold.

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→Lessthanhalfthedamagedmerchandisewassalable.损坏的货物中不到一半可以出售6.用简单句不用复杂句

Aworldthatisrapidlychangingrequireseducationthatcontinues.

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→Arapidlychangingworldrequirescontinuingeducation.急遽变化的世界需要人们接受继续教育。Abusinessthatislocalisonethatdependsuponcustomerswhoaresteady.

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→Alocalbusinessdependsonsteadycustomers.地区性商业依赖固定的顾客。Communicationis,ofcourse,ofvitalimportancetoanybusinessthatwantstoachieveefficiency.

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→Communicationisvitaltobusinessefficiency.通讯对于商业效率是至关重要的。二、避免陈旧的商务用语一些商务英语写作教材中，我们不时可以看到一些陈旧的商务用语。这些表达方式使你的信函文体显得古板僵化，而且太正式的语气也使你和收信人之间的关系疏远。因此，我们有必要区别什么是现代常用的商务英语表达方式，什么是古老陈旧的商务套话（commercialese）。

1.开头部分

2.结尾部分

3.杂项三、在英语中用表示动作的词和主动语态写作使得行文更有力。用表示动作的陈述句来写，尽量少用therebe句型，例如：Therewerefourcompaniesthatbidforthecontract.

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→Fourcompaniesbidforthecontract.四家公司投标争取这项合同。TherewasameetingofthestaffyesterdayinChicago.

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→ThestaffmetyesterdayinChicago.工作人员昨天在芝加哥开了会。Therearetwointerestingproposalsforalternativeenergysourceswhichdeserveresearchsupport.

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→Twointerestingproposalsforalternativeenergysourcesdeserveresearchsupport.有两个关于利用替代能源的提议值得给予研究资助。四、使用主动语态还是被动语态一般来说，尽量使用主动语态。这样使得句子更强有力。只有及物动词才能在主动语态和被动语态之间转换。例如：Thebrokersoldthestocks.（主动语态，主语施加动作。）Thestocksweresoldbythebroker.（被动语态，主语是动作的接受者。）主动语态更直接、简短和有力。而被动语态则是用来陈述客观科学事实、表示不带个人感情，或者在不知道动作的执行者时用它。.”在下列句子中，使用主动语态要比使用被动语态好。

TheaddresswasdeliveredtotheABAbythepresidentlastweek.

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→ThepresidentaddressedtheABAlastweek.

Thebookswereorderedbyustwomonthsago.

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→Weorderedthebookstwomonthsago.在下列句子中，被动语态要比主动语态好。

Thereporthasbeenfiled.

Thebankwasclosed.

Theletterwasmarked“confidential有些公文式英语过分使用名词化的动词，从而使得句子软弱无力。下面这些名词后缀表示名词化的动词：-ion,-tion,-ing,-ment,-ant,-ent,-ance,-able。请避免使用下面左边这些名词化的动词：

cometoaconclusion－conclude

createanadjustment－adjust

renderassistance－assist

doastudy－study

练习一练习写简洁的句子1.删去下列句子中不必要的成分，把句子改写得更简洁。

A1）Shehasresignedfromherpostasinvoiceclerk.

→Shehasresignedasinvoiceclerk.2）Onewayoutofthedifficultystillremainsopen.

→Onewayoutofthedifficultyremainsopen.3）Intheeventofyourwishingmetodoso,Iwillcallonyounextweek.

→Ifyouwishmetodoso,Iwillcallonyounextweek.4）IhavebeenunabletoreplybeforeowingtothefactthatIhaveonlyjustreturnedfromabroad.

→IhavebeenunabletoreplybeforebecauseIhaveonlyjustreturnedfromabroad.6）HisappointmentdatesasandfromMarch1.

→HisappointmentdatesfromMarch1.8）Thetruefactsofthesituationarenotyetinourpossession.

→Thefactsofthesituationarenotyetinourpossession.

B1）Uponexaminingourrecords,itseemsthatyouhaveforgottentofilethepersonaldataformwhichisrequired.

→Wefindthatyouhaveforgottentofiletherequiredpersonaldataform.4）Themanagerwhoismostexperiencedandwiththegreatestefficiency,itseemsobvious,shouldbegivenconsiderationforbeingpromotedfirst.

→Obviously，themostexperiencedandefficientmanagershouldbeconsideredfirstforpromotion.25）Wetrustthatyouwillconcurwithourunderstandingofwhatthebillingstatementshouldbe;however,shouldyourequireadditionalinformation,pleasedonothesitatetocontactus.

→Webelievethatthebillingstatementiscorrect，butfeelfreetocontactusformoreinformation.

或Webelievethebilliscorrect，butcontactusifyouneedmoreinformation.2.改写下列句子。删除多余的词，改正结构错误。每道题改写成一个句子。2）Thefactsarethatweonlysold150Selectrictypewriters,whileunderthenewplan,250machinesweresoldinOctober,andreportsarethat400machineshavebeensoldalreadyinNovember.

→Wesoldonly150SelectrictypewritersinSeptember;butunderthenewplan,wesold250setsinOctoberand400inNovember.7）Themachineiswellworththatcostbecauseithascertaincharacteristicsthatareattractive.Productivitycanbeincreased,forexample,andthemachinehasversatilitythatisgreater.Besides,themachineiseasiertooperate.

→Themachineiscost-effectivebecauseithashigherproductivity,greaterversatilityandiseasiertooperate.15）Withreferencetotheforthcomingholidays,wehaveseenfittomakethefollowingarrangements.

→Wehavemadethefollowingarrangementsforthecomingholidays.练习二写简单句：按照指示把下面的句子改写成简单句或并列句。1.Theworldcanbedescribedasbeinginastateofflux;thatflux,orcontinuousstateofmovement,isconstant.Itneverchanges.

Onesimplesentence:Theworldisinastateofconstantflux.2.Thefactisthatenvironmentisadaptedtothewantswehave.Inturn,wantsarealteredwithcircumstance.

Onecompoundsentence:Environmentisadaptedtowants,andwantsalterwithenvironment.

3.Ideascomeintoexistence;machinesarecreated;peopleareborn.Allofthesethingsreachfruition,andthentheydie.Afterthattheyarereplacebynewideasandothermachinesandthenextgenerations.

Onesimplesentence:People,ideas,machinesarebornorcreated,reachfruitionanddie,tobereplacedbynewgenerations,newideas,andnewmachines.强势性意味着在词或句的排列和分量上要使最重要的思想占最重要的地位,使词或句子的意义加重或使语句变得有力,从而加深读者印象。练习三写强势句A有时therebe结构是有用的，有时则是多余的。请阅读下列句子，判断哪些是合适的，哪些需要删去therebe结构：1.Thereismuchcontroversyoverthenewtaxlaw.2.ThereisabookbySylviaPorter,HowtoGetMoreforYourMoney,thatwouldinterestyou.

→AbookbySylviaPorter,HowtoGetMoreforYourMoney,wouldinterestyou.3.TherearetwoworksbyrepresentativeAmericaneconomiststobeaddedtothelist.

→TwoworksbyrepresentativeAmericaneconomistsaretobeaddedtothelist.

5.Thereisananswertoproblem.6.Thereareasalesproposalandapersonnelreportontheagenda.练习四写强势句B2.Executivesaresentbysomecompaniestoconferencesonhandlingtelevisioninterviews.

→Somecompaniessentexecutivestoconferencesonhandlingtelevisioninterviews

练习五写强势句C找出下列句子中的be动词，并且用表示动作的词（actionverbs）代替表示状态的be：

例：Itismyopinionthatthetypewriterhasbeenrepaired.

修改后：Ithinkthatthetypewriterhasbeenrepaired.1.Heissomeonewhocanaccomplishagreatdealinashortperiodoftime.

→Hecanaccomplishalotinashortperiodoftime.4.Wehavebeeninbusinessmanufacturingfinefabricsforoverahundredyears.

→Wehavemanufacturedfinefabricsforoverahundredyears.

7.Itisourexpectationthatthestorewillsellbothmen'sandwomen'sclothing.

→Weexpectthatthestorewillsellbothmen'sandwomen'sclothing.练习八把下面的句子和段落改写成简洁易懂的话11）Americanbusinesshasagoal,whichistotrytoraisethestandardofliving.

→ThegoaloftheAmericanbusinessistoraisethelivingstandard.6）Thereisanothernameforspecialization;thatis,itiscalledthedivisionoflabor.

→Thereisanothernameforspecialization;thatis,thedivis