SARWOOD酒店集团通过管理冲突建立和谐关系培训教程

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通过管理冲突建立和谐关系培训教程Exercise:WarmItUp!

练习：热身活动！Selectoneofthelisted‘arguments’选择列表中的争论之一2.Selectsomeoneyoudon’talreadyknowwell

选择一个你不熟悉的学员搭档Introduceyourself介绍你自己Foroneminute,“convince”thepersonofyour‘argument’

用一分钟时间，让对方信服你的争论的话题Reverseroles交换角色Completethedebriefquestions

完成小节问题PLG1SixMythsOfConflict

六个关于冲突的误解IfIignoreit,itwillgoaway忽略冲突，它会自行消失。Allconflictmustberesolved必须解决所有的冲突。Conflictdamagesinnovationandproductivity冲突会损害创新和生产率。4.Conflictisalwaysbad冲突一直都是有害的。Conflictisasignthatthereisamajorproblem冲突是存在重大问题的信号。Conflictisasignthat“management”doesn’tcare

冲突是“管理层”不负责的一个信号PLG2TheFivePrinciples

五项原则Conflictmanagementisalearnedbehavior冲突管理一项学习行为

2.Conflictisalwaysatwopartyaffair冲突发生在两个人之间

3.Whenyouimproveyourconflictskills,youWILLimproveyourrelationships,yourbusinesssuccess,andlife.Period!当你解决冲突的技巧提升了，你的人际关系、商业成功和生活质量也将得到提升。句号！

4.Becomingeffectiveatdealingwithconflictisaconsciouschoice有效地处理冲突是一个有意识的选择

5.Whenyoupractice,yourskillsbecomeautomatic熟能生巧

PLG3WhatWillILearn?

我将学到什么？Reviewthelistedstatements

阅读表格中的陈述Identifythefivemostimportanttoyou

确定对你最重要的五个PLG5Housekeeping

管家部SessionTime:8:30-5:30

培训时间：8:30–5:30BreakRoomandRestRooms

休息间CellPhonesandPagers

手机和寻呼机RoomTemperature

房间温度ClassAgreements

课堂协议WhatHasBeen

YourExperience?

你曾经历过什么？Thinkofarecentconflictwithaco-worker,orfamilymemberthatyouinitiated

回想最近由你发起的和同事或家人之间的冲突2.Respondtothelistedquestions

回答列表上的问题Note:Onlyyouwillseethisworksheet

注意：只有你自己看得到PLG6Self-Assessment

自我测评Evaluationofyourcurrentknowledgeofthistopicareawillhelpyoutodeterminehowthisworkshopcanenhanceyourcurrentskilllevel该评估将帮助你确定本教程将在多大程度上提升你目前的技能水平。

Pleasebehonest.Onlyyouwillseetheresults

请如实回答，只有你自己看得到。

PLG7Self-Assessment

自我测评-5051-7475-100LM1:WhatIsConflict?

学习模块1：什么是冲突“Conflictoccurswheneverpeopledisagree.Positiveconflictcreatesenergy,passion,opportunity,andpersonalgrowth.Negativeconflictstiflescreativity,hurtsrelationships,andreducespersonalgrowth.无论何时，只要人们意见不一，就会发生冲突。积极的冲突会带来能量、激情、机会和个人成长。消极的冲突则阻碍创造性、伤害关系、妨碍个人成长。

Itisnottheconflictitself,butourreactiontotheconflictthatmaydamagearelationshiporcauseadditionalproblems.”并不是冲突本身，而是我们对冲突所做出的反应伤害了关系或导致其他的各种问题。

PLG8ContinuumOfConflict冲突连连续体体PLG8SixSourcesOfConflict冲突的的六个个来源源Information(FactsorData)信息(事事实或或数据据)Interpretation(MisunderstandingorMiscommunication)理解(理理解错错误或或沟通通错误误)3.Interests(DifferingWants,NeedsandDesires)利益益(不不同同的的想想法法，，需需求求和和渴渴望望)4.Intentions(Hiddenagendas,Dishonesty)目的的(潜潜藏藏的的算算盘盘，，不不诚诚实实)5.Structural结构构6.InternalBeliefs(Values,CoreBeliefs,etc.)固有有观观念念(价值值观观，，核核心心信信仰仰等等)PLG9-10WhatIsTheSource?冲突突来来源源是是什什么么？？Individually,readthecasestudy独自自阅阅读读案案例例学学习习2.Whendone,answereachquestionasatablegroup阅读读完完毕毕，，以以小小组组为为单单位位回回答答问问题题3.Pleasebepreparedtoshareyourresponsewiththelargergroup请准准备备好好和和大大家家分分享享你你们们的的回回答答。。PLG11LM2––CommonConflictApproaches学习习模模块块2——常常见见的的冲冲突突处处理理方方式式扁桃桃结结构构“蜥蜴蜴大大脑脑””大脑脑皮皮层层“思维维大大脑脑””1.刺刺激激因因素素3.理理解解2.回回应应PLG12WhatHappensToYou?你遇遇到到了了什什么么情情况况？？Readthelistednaturalresponsestoconflict阅读下列列对冲突突的自然然反应Identifythoseyouhaveexperienced确定你曾曾体验过过的Note:Onlyyouwillseetheresults注意：只只有你自自己看得得到PLG13TheMainCausesOfConflictAnxiety冲突焦虑虑的主要要成因FearofAttention注意力恐恐惧FearofFailure失败恐惧惧Fearofauthority权力恐惧惧FearofEvaluation评估恐惧惧LackofConfidence缺乏信心心LackofExperience缺乏经验验LackofSkills缺乏技能能PoorPastExperiences过去的失失败经历历PLG14HowCanIOvercomeThis?我该如何何克服？？BeforetheEvent事前Prepare!Prepare!Prepare!准备！准准备！再再准备！！GainExperience获得经验验TeachYourselfHowtoRelax教会自己己如何放放松Visualizetheevent将事件形形象化TurnNervousnessintoPositiveEnergy化紧张为为能量PLG15JustBeforetheEvent事前最后后准备CompleteYourChecklist完成你的的检查RelaxintheMoment放松片刻刻UsePositiveSelf-talk利用积极极自我对对话Duringtheevent事中TakeControlBreath控制呼吸吸ConcentrateonYourMessage关注你的的讯息Don'tapologizeForBeingNervous不要为紧紧张道歉歉Ignoreit忽略紧张张OrganizeYourMind理清思路路Pretend假装没事事Controlthepace控制节奏奏HowCanIOvercomeThis?我该如何何克服？？PLG16AftertheEvent事后BeSupportive支持自己己RewardYourself奖励自己己GetPerspective获得多方方见解HowCanIOvercomeThis?我该如何何克服？？PLG16WhatCanIDoToReduceAnxiety?我该如何何减轻焦焦虑？Thinkaboutthecauseofanxietyyouhaveexperienced想想你经经历过的的导致焦焦虑的原原因Reviewandidentifylikelywaystoreduceyouranxiety回顾并确确定你可可能用到到的减轻轻焦虑的的方法PLG17WhatAreTheFiveConflictStyles?五种冲突突风格是是什么？？Whatstyleareyou?你是什么么风格？？Challenging挑战Integrating整合Evading逃避Obliging礼让Compromising妥协ConcernforOthers考虑他人低高高Concernsforself考虑自身PLG18WhatStyleAreYou?你是什么么风格？？CompletetheConflictStyleassessmenttoidentifyyourpreferredconflictstyle完成冲突风风格评估表表，确定你你偏爱的风风格Reviewthecorrespondingstyleexplanationonpage19阅读相应的的风格解释释P19PLG19TheChallengingStyle挑战风格Pursueshisorherownconcernsattheotherperson’sexpense个体追求他他们各自的的想法，却却以损害他他人为代价价。Partiesinvolvedintheconflictusetheirpowertoresolvetheconflict参与冲突的的各方利用用他们的权权力解决冲冲突。Somemethodsusedarestrikes,politicalmaneuvering,violence,orwar有些方法如如罢工，政政治手腕，，暴力或战战争。“Mywayorthehighway”要么按照我我的方式，，要么比试试比试ConcernforSelfConcernforOthersPLG19Pros&ConsOfChallenging挑战风格利利与弊Advantages优势Positivestyleduringacrisis,orwhenanoutcomeiscriticalforoneparty当处于危机机情况或结结果对一方方至关重要要时，这种种风格是积积极的Bestusedwhenmarshallingfacts,providingexpertcounsel,andgeneratingadialogueduringconflict使用时，最最好列举事事实，邀请请专家顾问问，进行对对话。Disadvantages弊端Rarelyeffectivewiththesamepartymorethanafewtimes对同一对象象多次使用用不易奏效效Overlookstheneedofothers忽视他人的的需求PLG19TheObligingStyle礼让风格Neglectshisorherownconcernsandneedstosatisfytheconcernsorneedsoftheotherperson个体忽略自自身的利益益和需求，，使他人满满意Givespowertoothers授权给他人人ConcernforSelf“Itwouldbemypleasure”这是我的快快乐所在ConcernforOthersPLG19Pros&ConsOfObliging礼让风格利利与弊Advantages优势Acknowledgesthevalueofothersormakingthemfeelbetteraboutanissue承认他人的的价值，使使他们对问问题有更好好的感受Usedtofindacommongroundasinpreservingarelationship常寻求共同同点以保持持关系Disadvantages弊端Placesalowvalueonselfrelativetoothers将自身价值值置于他人人之后Oftenmeansownneedsarenotmet常意味着本本身需求不不能得到满满足Oftentakenadvantageofbythechallengingstyle常使他人借借助挑战风风格优势PLG19TheEvadingStyle逃避风格Doesnotadmitthatthereisaconflict,oravoidsdealingwitharecognizedconflict不承认存在在冲突或回回避处理得得到认可的的冲突Takesnoactiontoresolvetheconflictbyeither(orany)oftheinvolvedparties当事双方不不采取任何何措施解决决冲突Theconflictresolvesonitsown,orthepartiesavoideachother要么是冲突突自行消解解，要么是是当事双方方互相回避避“I’llthinkaboutittomorrow””我明天再想想这件事。。ConcernforSelfConcernforOthersPLG19Pros&ConsOfEvading逃避风格利利与弊Advantages优势Defertheissueifitisnotimportanttopursueatthemoment,sothatthingsmaycooloff如果冲突不不重要，就就将其暂搁搁，等冲突突慢慢化解解Canbeusedto“buytime””butmustbeusedwisely可以用来““拖延”战战术，但使使用时要明明智Disadvantages弊端Notarecommendedapproach不是推荐的方方法Maybeseenaspassingthebuckorsidesteppingtheissue可以看作是推推卸责任或回回避问题Resultsareslowinformingandproducingandmaycreategreaterconflictlater产生结果很缓缓慢，可能导导致日后更大大的冲突PLG19TheIntegratingStyle整合风格Attemptstoworkwiththeotherpersontofindasolutionthatfullysatisfiestheconcernsandneedsofboth想要和他人合合作共同找出出双赢的解决决方案Bothpartiesinvolveduseindividualinitiative,creativity,andmediationtoresolvetheirconflicts当事双方积极极主动，发挥挥创造性，采采取调解的方方式来解决冲冲突“Twoheadsarebetterthanone”三个臭皮匠，，顶个诸葛亮亮。ConcernforSelfConcernforOthersPLG19Pros&Cons

OfIntegrating整合方式利与与弊Advantages优势Recommendedformostconflict推荐的解决大大多数冲突的的方法Resultsinstronger,mutuallybeneficialrelationships能产生坚固、、互惠互利的的关系Win-win,commonground,andacceptablesolutionsarecreated创造双赢、共共同立场和可可接受的方案案Greatforproblemsolving解决问题的好好办法Disadvantages弊端Notproductivewhenpeoplereallywanttofight若双方确有争争斗想法，则则效果不大Worksbetterifeveryonewithaninterestisincluded解决方案中如如果考虑到各各方利益，则则更为奏效PLG19TheCompromisingStyle妥协风格Triestofindsomeexpedient,mutuallyacceptablesolution,whichatleastpartiallysatisfiesbothparties体试图找到一一个互相能够够接受的权宜宜之计，至少少能让大家都都满意一点。。“Let’sMakeADeal”一言为定！ConcernforSelfConcernforOthersPLG19Pros&Cons

OfCompromising妥协风格利与与弊Advantages优势Veryeffectivewithcomplexissuesorthereisabalanceofpower在解决复杂问问题并有权力力对比的冲突突中，非常有有效Goodwhenbothpartiesarereadytomeetinthemiddle找到能既能满满足双方需求求，又能使其其各让一步的的恰当点时最最好Getspeopletalkingabouttheissuesandtendstomovethemclosertogether让人们考虑问问题，向共同同点靠拢Disadvantages弊端Allpartiesaregivingupsomethinginordertoagreeorfindaresolution为寻求解决方方案，当事各各方须做出一一定的放弃Inbusiness,youmaybeaccusedoffavoritismunlessbothpartieshavesomethingtolose在公事上，除除非双方都各各有损失，否否则你会被说说占了便宜PLG19WhatShouldYouDo?你该做什么？？Forminto5groups组成五个小组组Eachgroupstandsinfrontofoneofthestylesflip-charted各个小组分别别站在五个不不同风格的白白版前Brainstorm&recordusefultechniquestodealwiththestyle集思广益，记记录处理该风风格的有用的的技术Rotatetonextstyleafter3minutes三分钟后，轮轮流到下一种种风格的白板板前Repeatfor1minuteforeachoftheotherstyles在其他各个风风格上的用时时为一分钟PLG20MikeDidItRight!

MIKE做的没错！Individually,readthecasestudy独自阅读案例例2.Whendone,answereachquestionasatablegroup阅读完毕，小小组回答问题题Pleasebepreparedtoshareyourresponseswiththelargergroup做好准备和大大家分享PLG21作用于听者的效果正如发送者意图的那样。发送者对该效果有预见性。发送者接收者APerfectCommunicationSituation完美沟通场景行为是由视觉、听觉和语言等暗示组成的。

发送者通过其行为将意图准确的表现出来。听觉言语视觉58%35%7%LM3––WhatAreThe3V’sOfCommunication?学习模块3-什么是是3V沟通？PLG22PrinciplesOfSendingMessages发送讯息原则则Messagesaresentvisually,vocally,andverbally讯息是通过过3V，即语言（verbally）、视觉（visually）和声音（vocally）传递的。2.Therearenoprecisemeaningsforvisualorvocalmessages视觉或声音音讯息没有有准确的意意思，它们们的意思取取决于对方方的理解。。3.Competentcommunicatorssendmessageswheretheverbal,visual,andvocalmeaningsareconsistent–notcontradictory出色的沟通通大师发出出讯息时，，视觉、声声音和语言言三个部分分协调一致致，互不矛矛盾。4.ThesendercommunicatesanaccuratemessagewhenhisorherintentionsarealignedwitheachV讯息发送者者使他/她的意图与与3V一一对应，，发出精确确的讯息。。5.Theeffectamessagehasonthereceiverisdependantonthereceiver’sinterpretationofthesenders’intentionsandactions讯息对于接接收者产生生的效果，，取决于接接收者对发发出者意图图和行动的的理解PLG23Meaningisdeterminedbyourinterpretationofamessage,ratherthanbyitscontent讯息的含义义是由我们们的理解决定的，而而不是讯息息本身决定定的7.Notwodifferentpeoplewillinterpretamessageinexactlythesameway任何讯息都都有多种解解读方式；；两个人不不可能以完完全相同的的方式解读读同一讯息息8.Effectivecommunicatorsstrivetowardasmuch““sharedmeaning””aspossible,acceptingthatsomedifferencesareinevitable有效的沟通通致力于尽尽可能更多多地分享含含义、分享享理解，承承认不可避避免的差异异9.Thepossibilityfor“sharedmeaning”isincreasedwhentheintentionsofeachcommunicatorareclearlyunderstood.Thiscanbeachievedbyclarifyingthemessagethatwascommunicated当人们清楚楚地理解了了每个沟通通者的意图图时，分享享含义的可可能性就会会增大。分分享沟通背背后的意图图，澄清存存在期望得得到的感受受PrinciplesOfSendingMessages发送讯息原原则PLG23发送者接收者发送者的意图通过3V表现出来。干扰妨碍了发送者的讯息讯息接收者的效果不确定。

视觉听觉

言语干扰WhatIsNoise?什么是干扰扰？PLG24Preconceivedideas,bias,prejudicesormentalmodels固有的观念念、偏见或或成见Physicalenvironment物理环境Lowself-esteem,acceptance,orconfidenceofeitherthesenderorreceiver双方的自我尊尊重、自我接接受和自我信信心的程度较较低Differentlearningstylesbetweenthesenderandreceiver双方不同的学学习风格(线性，几何性性等)Naturalaptitudetounderstandorprocessinformation理解或处理信信息的自然能能力Theskilllevelofthemessagesender讯息发送者的的技能水平Theskilllevelofthereceiver(activelistening)讯息接收者的的技能水平Lowinterestinthemessage接收者对讯息息内容不感兴兴趣WhatCausesCommunicationNoise?是什么导致了了沟通“干扰扰”？PLG25WhatIsActiveListening?什么是积极聆聆听？“ActiveListeningisusingallofyourattention,focusingonwhatthesenderissaying,andshowingthesenderthatyouheardandunderstoodhisorherintendedmessage.集中精力，关关注对方说的的话，向对方方示意你听到到/明白他试图传传递的讯息。Activelisteningusesverbal,vocal,andvisualbehaviorstodemonstratedynamicunderstandingwithverylittleeffort.”积极聆听并不不费力，只需需使用视觉、、听觉和语言言行为来展示示动态理解积积极聆听。PLG26WhatDoYouThink?你是怎么想的的？Inyourtablegroup:在你所在的小小组：Reviewthelistedstatements阅读下列陈述述2.Recordyourdiscussion记录讨论内容容3.Pleasebepreparedtoshareyourthoughts准备和大家分分享你们的想想法PLG26WhyShouldIDoIt?&TheNineHabits我为什么要做做&九个习惯惯ReviewthelistedbenefitsofActiveListening阅读列出的积积极聆听的好好处Identifytheone’smostimportanttoyou确定对你最重重要的一点Reviewthelistedlisteninghabits阅读列出的聆聆听习惯Identifythehabitsyouneedtoworkon确定你需要练练习的习惯PLG27Prepareyourselfforlistening做好准备积极极聆听Preparetolisten准备聆听Develophabitsoffocusingattentiononothers培养关注他人人的习惯Listen–despitedoubtsorsuspicions聆听—摈弃怀怀疑和猜测Examinetherolesandpurposeofthesituation审视特定情景景中各方的角角色与目的Identifythestyle&languageofthespeaker确定发言者的的风格和语言言特征ListeningToClearlyUnderstandTheSender通过倾听来清清晰理解语者者的含义PLG28Createapositivelisteningsituation创造积极的聆聆听环境Createapleasant,businesslikesetting创造愉快的商商务型聆听环环境Minimizeinterruptions把干扰降至最最低Pickagoodtimetolisten选择恰当的时时候聆听Breakoffmeetingsiftheatmosphereisn’’tconducivetogoodcommunications如果气氛不利利于沟通，就就暂停讨论ListeningToClearlyUnderstandTheSender通过倾听来清清晰理解语者者的含义PLG29Useactivequestiontechniques使用积极的提提问技巧Useopen-endedquestions提开放式问题题Useclose-endedquestions提封闭式问题题Useactiveparaphrasingtechniques使用积极的复复述技巧Usepositive,non-evaluativeverbalreinforcers(acknowledgment)使用积极的、、非评估性的的语言刺激（认可）f.Takenotes做记录ListeningToClearlyUnderstandTheSender通过倾听来清清晰理解语者者的含义PLG29-31Usepositivevisualreinforcers使用积极的视视觉刺激Useparroting使用重复方法法Usereflectivephrases使用反射式语语言Showtheotherpersonthatyouunderstand向他人表示你你的理解Conductaperceptioncheck检查你的认知知Summarizethediscussionwhenappropriate适当的时候总总结讨论ListeningToClearlyUnderstandTheSender通过倾听来清清晰理解语者者的含义PLG31-33Exercise:DoThis,TryThat!练习：做做这这个，练练那那个Writeabriefsentenceortwothatparaphrasesthelistedstatements用一两个短句句，解释各陈陈述的内容Oncefinished,followthedirectionsforparttwo完成后，遵循循指示进入第第二部分Respondtothequestions回答问题PLG34WhenIsActiveListeningInappropriate?什么情况下不不适合积极聆聆听？Whenthesender‘‘semotionissostrongthatitdoesn’tneedtobereflected当说话人的情情绪非常清楚楚，不需要在给给他反射时2.Whenthesenderisnotfeelingout-of-balance当说话人感觉觉不自在、情情绪化或失控控时3.Whenthesenderneedsinformationyouhave当说话人要聆聆听者提供具具体的信息时时4.Whenthesenderwantstostopsending当说话人想停停下来时5.Whenaco-workerdoesnothavethetimetospendonaroutinematter当聆听方没有有必要的时间间聆听时6.Whenthesenderwantsthekindofhelpthatthehelpingagentdoesn'twanttoprovide当发送者需需要帮助，，接收者不不想提供帮帮助PLG35LM4:WhyDoWeNeedRelationships?学习模块4：我们为为什么要和和谐关系？？RelationshipshelpfulfillourneedforSAFETYandSECURITY人际关系帮帮助满足我我们的安全全感RelationshipshelpfulfillourneedforasenseofBELONGING人际关系帮帮助满足我我们的归属属感RelationshipshelpfulfillourneedforSIGNIFICANCE人际关系帮帮助满足我我们的价值值感RelationshipsprovideuswithSUPPORT人际关系为为我们提供供支持PLG36ComponentsofPositiveWorkRelationships&Trust积极的工作作关系和信信任的组成成部分Bothpartiesunderstandandmodifytheirstyles双方了解各各自风格，，并加以调调整2.Bothpartieshaveapositivesenseofself(acceptance,image,esteem)双方对自身身的感觉持持积极态度度（自我接接受、形象象、自尊））3.Bothpartiesdisplaytrustingbehaviors双方表现出出信赖对方方的行为4.Bothpartiesdisplaytrustworthybehaviors双方表现出出值得信赖赖的行为PLG37-38ComponentsofPositiveWorkRelationships&Trust积极的工作作关系和信信任的组成成部分Bothpartiesdisplaypredictablebehaviors双方表现出出预见性的的行为6.Thereismutualrespect相互尊重7.Bothpartiesstriveforamutuallybeneficialoutcome(compromise)双方致力于于取得互惠惠互利的结结果（妥协协）8.Thereispositivedialogue积极对话YouAndTrustingBehaviors你和和你你的的诚诚信信行行为为Take3minutestorespondtothelistedquestions花三三分分钟钟时时间间回回答答问问题题Pleasebehonest.Onlyyouwillseetheresults请如如实实回回答答，，只只有有你你自自己己看看得得到到PLG39KnowledgeCheck知识识检检测测Inyourtablegroup:在你你的的桌桌面面小小组组：：Reviewtheworkshopmaterial复习习教教程程内内容容2.Completethelistedquestions完成成问问题题3.Itisimportantthateveryoneatyourtablelearnthecorrectresponse小组组的的每每个个人人都都学学会会正正确确的的回回答答，，这这一一点点非非常常重重要要4.Youhave10minutes时间间为为10分分钟钟PLG40-41Exercise:DebriefandActionPlanning练习习：：小小结结和和行行动动计计划划Individually,reviewthecoursecontentuptothispoint单独独回回顾顾目目前前为为止止所所学学教教程程Answerthelistedquestions回答答问问题题Pleasebepreparedtoshareyourresponseswithyourtablegroup请和和你你的的小小组组分分享享答答案案PLG42EA1––PreventConflict预防防冲冲突突EA2––PrepareforConflict准备备冲冲突突EA3––ConfronttheOtherPerson面对对他他人人EA4––ReachanAgreementtoResolvetheConflict达成共识识，解决决冲突EA5–PracticetheChanges实践改变变Howto……BuildRelationshipsbyManagingConflict如何通过过管理冲冲突建立立和谐关关系PLG43WhyshouldIdoit?为什么我我要做？？Increasespersonalandunitproductivitysincethereislessfrustrationandanimosity由于受挫挫度和敌敌意度不不高，可可以增加加个人和和集体生生产率Reducestheamountofemotionalenergyrequiredtobuildorsustainarelationship减少建立和维维持关系所需需的情感能量量值投入Cansavepersonalandprofessionalrelationships挽救个人和职职业关系Createsahealthy,moreacceptingworkorhomeenvironment创造一个健健康的，更更为能够接接受的工作作和家庭环环境Oftenpreventsunintendedconsequencesorundesirableemotions经常避免产产生无意图图的结果或或令人不快快的情绪EA1:PreventConflict关键行动1：预防冲冲突PLG44EA1:HowDoI

PreventConflict?我该如何预预防冲突？？Don’tallowyourhotbuttonstobepushed不要触及你你的恼怒神神经b.Handleemotionalbehaviorwhenitoccurs处理情绪行行为c.Focusontheissue,event,behavior,orsituation关注问题，，事件，行行为或形势势d.Knowyourconflictstyle了解你自己己的冲突风风格e.Recognizepotentialsourcesofconflict认识潜在的的冲突来源源f.Maintaintheperson’sself-esteem维护个人的的自尊PLG45-49EA1:HowDoI

PreventConflict?我该如何预预防冲突？？Beasupportivelistener做一个乐于于支持对方方的聆听者者Dealwithhiddensarcasmwhenitoccurs应对隐藏的的嘲讽Walkyourtalk言行一致Strivetounderstandtheotherperson,thentobeunderstood努力理解他他人，再被被他人理解解Beproactivetoimproveallsituations积极主动改改善各种形形势HowDoIDoIt?我该怎么做做？Don’tallowyourhotbuttonstobepushed不要触及你你的恼怒神神经Discoverthereasonfortheperson’sbehavior发现人们行行为的原因因Processyourfeelings处理理你你的的感感受受Disengagefromthesituation暂时时脱脱离离当当时时的的形形势势Usepositiveself-talk利用用积积极极的的自自我我对对话话Keepperspective保持持主主见见PLG45WhatAreYourHotButtons?你的的恼恼怒怒神神经经是是什什么么？？Inyourtablegroup:在你你的的小小组组：：Individually,makealistofyourstrongdislikes:yourhotbuttons单独列出你最最不喜欢的事事物－你的恼恼怒神经Ingroupsoftwo,taketurnsdiscussingeachofyourhotbuttons两个小组轮流流讨论各自小小组中每个人人的恼怒神经经PLG45HowDoIDoIt?我该怎么做？？Handleemotionalbehaviorwhenitoccurs处理情绪行为为Beawareofthesignsofemotionalbehavior注意情绪行为为的信号Apologize道歉Calmlydescribetheperson’sbehavior冷静描述对方方的行为Askifthepersonpreferstocontinuethediscussion,postponeit,orhandleitadifferentway询问对方是希希望继续讨论论，还是推迟迟讨论，或者者用其它方法法进行处理Expresssupportandreassurance表现出支持，，使对方放心心PLG46HowDoIDoIt?我该怎么做？？Focusontheissue,event,behavior,orsituation关注问题，事事件，行为或或形势Limituseofthepronoun““you”unlessitisinrelationtoapositivecomment限制对代词““你”使用，，除非是在和和积极建议有有关的时候。。用“你的的”会更好些些。Donotassumetheotherperson’’s“intentions”不要假设其他他人的“意图图”Explainthecauseoftheproblemtothepersonandtheproperwaytohandlethesituationtopreventitfromhappeningagain向对方解释产产生问题的原原因，和处理理该形势的正正确方法，以以防止此类事事情再次发生生。Donotattacktheperson’’sintentions,character,integrity,etc不要攻攻击人人们的的意图图、性性格和和正直直感等等。PLG47HowDoIDoIt?我该怎怎么做做？Knowyourconflictstyle了解你自己己的冲突风风格Recognizepotentialsourcesofconflict认识潜在的冲冲突来源Lookforongoingconflictproducingsituations寻找导致发生生中的冲突的的形势Lookforreal-timeconflictproducingsituations寻找导导致实实时冲冲突的的形势势Maintaintheperson’sself-esteem维护个个人的的自尊尊Beconfidentinyourpositionandinput对自身身的立立场和和给予予对方方的灌灌输持持自信信态度度Activelylistentootherssotheyknowtheyareimportant积极聆聆听，，使他他们感感受到到其重重要性性Beasupportivelistener做一个个乐于于支持持对方方的聆聆听者者PLG47-48Dealwithhiddensarcasmwhenitoccurs应对对隐隐藏藏的的嘲嘲讽讽Bringthesarcasmoutintotheopen挑明明嘲嘲讽讽Questionforintentorthehiddenagenda质问问对对方方嘲嘲讽讽的的意意图图Maintainyourcomposure保持持风风度度Bepositive态度度积积极极Controlyourexpectations控制制你你的的期期望望HowDoIDoIt?我该该怎怎么么做做？？PLG48DealingWithHiddenSarcasm应对隐藏藏的嘲讽讽Readandrespondtothelistedquestions阅读案例例，回答答问题PLG48Walkyourtalk言行一致致Onlyholdothersaccountabletothesamestandardsyouholdyourself用要求他他人的标标准同样样要求自自己Treatotherswithrespectandcourtesyandencourageyourco-workerstodothesame尊重他人人，礼貌貌待人。。鼓励你你的同事事也这样样做Strivetounderstandtheotherperson,thentobeunderstood努力理解解他人，，再被他他人理解解Addressother’sneeds,concerns,andquestionspromptly迅速记录录他人的的需求、、关注和和问题Ifaquestionariseslisten,askquestions,andgiveasolutionoradvice如果某个个问题让让你特别别关注，，提出问问题并给给出建议议HowDoIDoIt?我该怎么做做？PLG49Beproactivetoimproveallsituations积极主动改改善各种形形势Ifaproblemarises,investigateituntilyouhavedeterminedtherootcauseandfixit如果问题出出现，进行行调查知道道确定导致致问题的根根源并进行行解决Donottreatjustthesymptombecauseitisexpedient;Takethetimetoridyourcompanyoftheproblemforgood不要采取权权宜之计进进行处理，，花时间将将问题根除除HowDoIDoIt?我该怎么做做？PLG49PLG50Tips&Traps贴士和陷阱阱Tips贴士Beunderstanding体谅他人Knowwhatamediatorwoulddo了解调解者者的行为Chooseyourwordscarefully谨慎选择用用词Keepassumptionsoutofthepicture远离主观假假设Traps陷阱Filteringthefacts过滤事实Becarefulwhenexpressingyourownemotionalbehavior谨慎表达你你自身的情情绪行为Gethelp需求帮助WhatDoYouThink?你是怎么认认为的？Individually,readthesituation单独阅读场场景Asagroup,answereachquestion以小组为单单位，回答答问题Pleasebepreparedtoshareyourresponsewiththelargergroup请准备好和和大家分享享PLG51Exercise:MakeAPlan练习：制定定计划Individually,considerthe12conflictpreventiontechniques独自回顾预预防冲突的的12个技术Identify3thatyoufeelwouldbesthelpyou确定三个对对你最有帮帮助的3.Makeaquickplan制定快捷计计划4.Shareyourmatrixwithyourtablegroup和你的小组组分享你的的计划PLG52EA2:PrepareForConflict关键行动2：为冲突突做准备WhyshouldIdoit?为什么我要要做？Helpyoufeelmorecomfortableandlessstressed帮助你感觉觉更为自在在，减轻压压力Enableapositiveconsciouschoiceaboutwhattodoaboutthegrowingconflict使你针对正正在发展的的冲突，做做出有意识识的积极选选择Improvetheoutcomeoftheconfrontation提升面对冲冲突后带来来的结果Savethepersonalorprofessionalrelationshipiftheconflictisappropriatelyresolved若冲突得到到恰当解决决，可挽救救个人/职业关系PLG53DressForSuccess成功之道Individually,readthecasestudy单独阅读以下下场景2.Whendone,answereachquestionasatablegroup以桌面小组为为单位，回答答问题3.Pleasebepreparedtoshareyourresponsewiththelargergroup请准备好和大大家分享你们们的结果PLG54WhatShouldI

ThinkAboutFirst?我首先需要考考虑什么？Focusoninterests,notpositions关注利益，而不是立场2.Speakfirsttotheotherperson’’sneeds首先交谈他人人需求3.Claimyourightsandpower(ifnecessary)要求自己的权权利和权力（（必要时）PLG55-56WhatShouldI

ThinkAboutFirst?我首先需要考考虑什么？Fivestepstoclaimingyourpower:要求自身权力力时须遵循的的五个步骤：：Identifywhatyoureallywantandwhatothersreallywant确定自己和他他们的真正需需要Whenyouhavedecidedthatyouwantsomething,lookatthebiggerpicture-whatistherealdrivingforcebehindeachwant?当决定你的所所需时，从全全局着眼。每每种需求背后后的真正驱动动力量是什么么？Rankyourwantsinorderofimportance按重要性将需需求排序Determinewhocontrolswhatyouwant,andwhoorwhatstandsinthewayofgettingit确定是什么人人在控制着你你的需求，是是什么人或物物阻止你到达达需求？Identifytheresourcesthatyoucontrol,andthepeoplewhowantthoseresources确定定由由你你控控制制的的资资源源，，及及是是哪哪些些人人要要得得到到那那些些资资源源Describethegrowingconflictasobjectivelyasyoucan尽可可能能客客观观地地描描述述发发生生的的冲冲突突b.Assessthepotentialimpact估计计潜潜在在的的影影响响c.Clarifyyourneedsandinterests阐明你的的需求和和利益d.Clarifytheother’sneedsandinterests阐明他人人的需求求和利益益e.Gathertheessentialinformation收集基本本信息f.Identifypossibleoptions确定可能能的选项项g.Selectastrategy选择战略略HowDoIDoIt?我该怎么么做？PLG57-62FiveBasicStrategies五个基本本战略Evade逃避Challenge挑战Compromise妥协Oblige礼让Integrate整合PLG63HowDoIDoIt?我该怎么么做？Makesureconfrontationisappropriate确保冲冲突交交涉恰恰当进进行Choosetherighttimeandplace选择恰恰当的的时机机和场场所Chooseatime选择时时机Choosealocation选择地地点Scheduleanappointment(option)安排会会面（（可选选项））Prepareaquickagenda快速准准备议议程表表Notifytheparty提醒对对方Dealwithresistance处理对对方拒拒绝Organizeyourthoughts组织织你你的的思思维维PLG64-66WhatAreTheTenThoughtTraps?十个个思思维维陷陷阱阱是是什什么么？？Mefirst先已已后后人人Youfirst先人人后后己己Icanhandlethisrightnow我现在就能能解决Idon’tneedtoprepare我不需要做做准备Limitingperspective目光短浅Youcan’tgettherefromhere没有方向Blindman’sbluff盲人摸象Let’sgetthisoverwith草草了事Iknowwhat’sgoingon我知道正在在发生什么么Thereisonlyonewaytoskinacat认为只有一一种解决之之道PLG67PrepareForTheConflict为冲突做准准备Consideranupcomingconflictsituationandanswerthelistedquestionstohelpyoudefineyourapproach考虑即将发发生的冲突突形势，回回答下列问问题，以帮帮助你确定定你的处理理方式PLG68-69PLG70Tips&Traps贴士和陷阱阱Tips贴士Knowyoursharedvaluesandinterests了解你的共共享价值和和利益Focusonwhy关注为什么Preventsurprises防止出乎意意料Considerpossiblereasonsforthebehavior/performance考虑对方行行为/表现可能的的原因Traps陷阱Defensiveparticipant参与者有防防备心理Uninterestedparticipant参与者兴趣趣不高Proceedwithoutfear不要畏惧Becarefulofstrongfeelings小心处理强强烈情绪Exercise:Dave’sTemper练习：Dave的脾气Individually,readthesituation独自阅读场场景Asagroup,completethefeedbackplanner以桌面为小小组，完成成反馈计划划表PLG71AwkwardSituation尴尬的局面面Individually,readthecasestudy单独阅读案案例分析2.Whendone,answereachquestionasatablegroup阅读结束，，小组回