英语写作解析PPT课件(PPT 70页)

1、英语写作解析 第1页，共70页。同等学力英语作文大纲概述根据大纲要求，考生应具备一般性英语书面表达能力，能够根据所给的提纲、情景或图表等按要求写出相应的短文。所写短文要求主题明确、条理清楚、语言比较规范。本部分采用提纲、情景或图表作文等考试形式。考生应按要求写出一篇不少于150 单词的英语短文。本部分满分15 分，考试时间30分钟。根据上述引证的大纲中对写作考试的要求，可以进一步明确，本考试的短文写作题材一般都与日常生活、科普或政经常识有关，所给的写作题目都具有较强的可写性；考生应能够根据所给的提纲、情景或图表等写出适当的议论文、说明文、文字或图表描述文。第2页，共70页。（二）、同等学力英语

2、写作命题趋势1 题材为议论文近年来，同等学力英语作文一直都以议论文为主要命题题材，题目主题广泛，主要是社会热点问题，如材料性读后感（2010），博客(2009)，信心 (2008),养老(2007), 职业发展(2006), 旅游黄金周(2000), 人生励志与职业追求(2001),财富观(2002)等。2. 图表、看图作文是另一种主要形式图表作文要求对图表进行分析，总结图表数据所反映的现象，分析形成这一现象的原因，并做趋势的预测。第3页，共70页。4 应试策略无论哪种类型的文章都包括三个段落：主题段、扩展段落和总结段。（1） 观点型（又称为My View 型）：要求作者评论某件事物，综合其他

3、观点，然后再发表自己的观点，或从某一现象引申出作者对它的看法。（2） 两面型（AB）：对某一事件的优缺点或利弊进行正反两个方面的剖析，最后得出自己的结论。（3） 问题型：按过程顺序或因果顺序阐述某一问题或现象的解决对策，如：How to Make Good Use of Leisure Time；How to Solve Housing Problems in Big Cites？第4页，共70页。（4）综合运用型（What，Why 型）：首先说明客观事物的构造、性质与功能；其次阐述其存在的利弊，以及人们如何趋利避害、最大限度发挥新事物的作用。如以远程教育命题的作文，首先要明确远程教育指的是什

4、么，它的特点是什么；其次阐述它对教育普及所起的作用，以及产生的问题；最后提出发挥远程教育优势的建议。考生在完成短文写作时，应从以下几个方面把握：1. 统一性（Unity）统一性即短文必须围绕着主题展开，不能有多个中心。统一性主要表现在句子、段落和篇章三个层面上。2. 连贯性（Coherence）连贯性指句子与句子之间、段落与段落之间的衔接要自然通畅，主要体现在短文的逻辑发展顺序和过渡词语的运用上。第5页，共70页。1）逻辑顺序逻辑顺序包括时间顺序、空间顺序和高潮。叙述问题多用时间顺序，描写问题多用空间顺序。高潮形成是指按照其重要性或严重性安排各个发展点出现的顺序。英语语篇的逻辑安排一般先谈最次

5、要的内容，继而较为重要的内容，最后才是最重要的内容，从而形成高潮。如：Cigarette smoking may cause a lot of harm to mans health. By and large, smokers are more likely to catch lung cancer than non-smokers whose health is similarly damaged. Also, they increase their chances of having a heart attack. According to official reports, one p

6、erson dies from smoking every ten seconds. 本段中心是“a lot of harm to mans health”。第一二个发展点为lung cancer和heart attack。两种疾病的严重程度实际不相上下。但显然lung cancer更为人普遍接受，因而把间接后果heart attack放在直接后果lung cancer之后，更能突出其危害，最后引用权威数字，强化说服力，最终形成高潮。Class practice: drunken driving 第6页，共70页。2）过渡词的使用 - 语篇的外在连贯手段借助过渡词取得语篇的连贯是英语最突出的特

7、点之一。诸如however, similarly, on the other hand, therefore等过渡词比比皆是。3. 语言比较规范（Accuracy）许多考生失败的原因在于他们尚未掌握最基本的遣词造句技能，甚至不能保证单词拼写正确、句子无重大语法错误。学生常常原创一些chinglish expressions，或胡乱搭配。如：Learn knowledge? obtain/get/gain/acquire knowledgeTeach knowledge? help somebody gain a lot of knowledge/ help me enrich/improve

8、my knowledge/ somebody taught me a lot. 第7页，共70页。III东、西方思维差异对写作的影响1.英语语篇线性修辞模式英语语篇思维有三种模式：一般特殊性（Generalization-Particular Pattern）；问题解决性（Problem-Solution Pattern）;匹配比较性（Matching Pattern）根据历年考试写作试题分析，作文框架基本都能在这三种中找到各自定位。其中尤以第一种最为常见。第8页，共70页。1）一般特殊性又称作“直线型”（linearity），其特点是，开篇第一句话往往是概括主题思想，然后引出具体事例或细节对

9、其进行发展。如：Everyone agrees that water pollution is a serious problem today. Oceans, lakes, and rivers all over the world are becoming polluted with garbage and dangerous chemicals. Factories contribute to the problem because they rely on the rivers for disposing of wastes. Oil and other chemicals can k

10、ill fish and people make water bad for drinking. Polluted water is a hazard to everyone. Since people are dependent on water, they should be involved in finding a solution to this problem. 显而易见，本段文字首句即为主题句，概括出轮廓，然后提出若干细节，包括江、河、湖、海以及工厂垃圾和有害化学物质，从而把水污染状况交代清楚。这种模式的文字在英语语篇中非常常见。阅读理解中常常要求学生找主题句，主题段的练习，实际

11、上也就是不断重复并熟悉这种思维模式的过程。Class practice: traffic jam第9页，共70页。2）问题解决性这种语篇模式首先说明情况，然后出现问题，接着做出评价，解决问题。即：Situations provided problems emerge evaluation provided solution provided 再如：1. (a). Helicopters are very convenient for dropping freight by parachute, (b) but this system has its problems. 2. Somehow t

12、he landing impact has to be cushioned to give a soft landing. 3. The movement to be absorbed depends on the weight and the speed at which the charge falls. 4. Unfortunately most normal spring systems bounce the load as it lands, sometimes turning it over. 5. (a). To avoid this, Bertin, developer of

13、the aero train, has come up with an air-cushion system (b). which assures a safe and soft landing. 1. (a) - 情况1. (b) 4. - 问题5. (a)- 反应5. (b)- 评价Class practice: Maglev 第10页，共70页。3）匹配比较性匹配比较性思维模式用于对比语段，常常与一般特殊性一起组成复杂的思维模式。对比包括两种类型，或立足两种事物之间的相似之处进行比较（compare），或立足两者间的不同之处进行对照(contrast)。Despite their ast

14、onishing differences in size, our solar system is quite similar to an atom structurally. First, at the center of our solar system is the sun. And at the center of an atom is the nucleus. Next, nine planets, including Mars, Venus, Jupiter and our earth travel around the sun. Similarly, there are also

15、 electrons whirling around the nucleus of the atom. Finally, there exists vast space between the celestial bodies in our solar system. An atom, too, consists mainly of emptiness. Although the solar system is extremely enormous while an atom is too small to see with the human eye, they are comparable

16、 in structure. 这段文字的比较特点非常明显。Class practice: home education VS school education第11页，共70页。2. 汉语螺旋型语篇修辞模式中国人的思维模式属于典型的“螺旋型”（spirality）。中国学生进行英语写作时，往往按照这种模式组织语句，很少写出“一般特殊性”，如主题句、段落等。比如下面一个场景。一篇描写作者在公共汽车上看见一个小姑娘为老人让座后的感想。原文开篇是这样的：In this world, we should think more of other people than of ourselves. By

17、so doing, our world will be full of happiness. This, of course, is my personal view. But it is a lesson I have drawn from one of my own experience. So now, I would like to share that experience with you, my dear reader. 从语法的角度来看，这段文字不错。从汉语的写作评价标准来看，这样的开头也很自然。但是，若按英语写作标准来看，评价只能是：This is essentially a

18、 solid essay. The writer uses an anecdote to make a point. But a better way is to provide the writer with a good, strong topic sentence using his own ideas to form it. 改写后的文字如下：A little girl taught me, and a busful of people, an important lesson about the importance of thinking more of other people

19、than of ourselves. One day I took a very crowded bus to school 第12页，共70页。IV. 英语写作丢分七大原因考生普遍意义上存在的缺陷，丢分原因有以下几点：一、不会审题 偏离主题很多考生在着手做写作题时并无审题和构思的概念，有的担心时间不够，有的则是无从下笔，如果不是文不对题就是时间已过半，只好草草收场。这种原因是最常见的，也和广大考生在考场上安排时间不好有关。二、用汉语思维 逐字翻译有的考生对英语遣词造句无把握，便用汉语构思文章，时不时将汉语句子硬译成英语，结果是非驴非马，无法理解。这点在英语基础薄弱的在职考生中最为常见，放下英

20、语多年，突然要写出流利的英语真的是一个难题。三、用词搭配不当英语语言的一大特点是其丰富的习惯用语和固定搭配，包括动词短语、介词短语、形容词短语，例如：花费很多时间做某事。spend much time in不能改成take much time in。词与词之间的固定搭配是由历史形成的，有的看起来不符合逻辑，但却是地道用法。四、词汇量小 表达困难 拼写错误部分学生能在写作中运用量太少，有的知道用法但又拼写不出来，结果只能用中文取而代之，成绩自然不会理想。第13页，共70页。五、句子逻辑关系混乱分考生因受汉语结构的影响，对句子中主谓语及状语之间的位置安排不妥，造成逻辑混乱。例如：Our Engli

21、sh class often told stories。应改为：We often told stories in our English class。六、不会运用关联词转承上下句子和段落联词即过渡词使上下句子和段落合理衔接。承上启下，使表达合乎逻辑，同时结构严谨，文章紧凑。例：People learn English to use it, some learn it to study or work abroad. Other learn it to read books and magazines in English or have something to do with English

22、-speaking foreigners。采用适当关联词，改进为：People learn English for practical purpose: some learn it to study or work abroad, while others learn it to read or communicate in English。第14页，共70页。七、语法错误语法错误主要表现为：1。分不清及物与不及物动词，例如：rise和raise; hear和listen等；2。被动语态与主动语态的误用，例如等interesting和interested; speaking和spoken等；3

23、。词类混淆，将动词或形容词误作名词用，将名词或动词误作形容词用等。例如benefit和beneficial; difficult和difficulty; pleasure和pleased等；4。混淆可数名词与不可数名词，例如family, practice等；5。冠词、情态动词、介词、代词等方面的错误，例如：a English book, should did, must done等。第15页，共70页。V. 常见英语写作句子错误A. Run-on Sentences（不间断句子、流水句）A run-on sentence incorrectly runs together two indep

24、endent clauses without a conjunction or punctuation. It confuses the reader, who will not know where one thought stops and the next begins.e.g. 1. The exam was postponed the class was cancelled as well.2. They planned to take a trip for their summer vacation, they were not able to save enough money.

25、第16页，共70页。B. Faulty Parallelism（错误平行结构）By placing two or more ideas of equal value in the same grammatical form will enable us to express these ideas clearly and emphatically. However, to position parallel ideas properly, we must pay close attention to the logic of grammatical relationship. The foll

26、owing sentences all contain faulty parallelism.1. I was told to report to the manager and that I should bring the documents.Revised: I was told to report to the manager and to bring the documents.2. James Joys Ulysses, a long and complicated novel and which is on our reading list, has been banned by

27、 the school board.Revised: James Joys Ulysses, which is a long and complicated novel and which is on our reading list, has been banned by the school board.第17页，共70页。3. Our new car not only is more economical but also it is more comfortable than our old one.Revised: Our new car is not only more econo

28、mical but also more comfortable than our old one.4. When we arrived home, we unpacked our suitcases, took showers, and then we went to sleep after eating our lunch.Revised: When we arrived home, we unpacked our suitcases, took showers, ate our lunch and went to sleep.5. He always has and always will

29、 compete for the highest honor.Revised: He has always competed and always will compete for the highest honor.6. The students attending our school are more intelligent than your school.Revised: The students attending our school are more intelligent than the students attending your school.In order to

30、position parallel ideas properly, we should correct faulty coordination, make a series of parallels, watch incorrect omissions and make correct comparisons when using than or as.第18页，共70页。C. Misplaced Modifiers（修饰语错置）Misplaced modifiers are words that, because of awkward placement, do not describe t

31、he words the writer intended them to describe. Misplaced modifiers often confuse the meaning of a sentence. To avoid this problem, modifiers should be put as close as possible to what they modify.Examples:1. Their telephone almost rang twenty times last night.Revised: Their telephone rang almost twe

32、nty times last night.2. Mother returned the hamburger to the super market that was spoilt.Revised: Mother returned the hamburger that was spoilt to the super market.第19页，共70页。D. Dangling Modifiers（悬垂修饰语）A dangling modifier is a phrase or an elliptical clause (a clause without a subject or verb or bo

33、th) that is illogically separated from the word it modifies. Thus it appears disconnected from the rest of the sentence. Here are a few examples of dangling constructions.1. After three hours of practice, a large mug of beer was what the thirsty dancers wanted.Revised: After three hours of practice,

34、 the thirsty dancers wanted a large mug of beer.2. To attain high marks in computer science, many hours of practice should be spent on the computer terminal.Revised: To attain high marks in computer science, a student should spend many hours of practice on the computer terminal.第20页，共70页。Assignments

35、: 1. Correct the errors in the following sentences:One of my greatest joys in life is eating desserts. Such as apple pie, cake and ice cream.Because he had eaten and drunk too much. He had to leave the party early. His stomach was like a volcano. That was ready to erupt.It rained all week, parts of

36、the highway were flooded.While sitting in class, she realized she had lost a ring. But happily found it in the womens room after class.My favorite teacher, a native of Australia, and who is also our tennis coach, is moving to another city next semester.We could see the football stadium driving acros

37、s the bridge.If I had my choice of seeing a rock concert or opera, I would choose the opera.After sitting for two hours in his office, the doctor finally let me into the examining room.The visiting hockey player stayed at our house from Boston.Once out of the city, the air pollution no longer made h

38、is eyes water.第21页，共70页。2. Rewrite the following sentences to make them more concise. Try not to change their basic meaning, though perhaps you will have to sacrifice a few nuances.My father was annoyed by the fact that I arrived late instead of being on time.I spotted a butterfly which was green in

39、 color; I would have caught it in my net if it had not been for a log which caused me to tip.He did a good job of delivering his speech in terms of persuasive delivery.I admired his writing not only for its terse conciseness but also for the fact that its ideas were expressed in a clear, lucid, stra

40、ightforward manner.The thing that caused the failure of the army to avoid defeat was the nature of its leadership, which was not competent.As a result of the fact that he had never learned the basic fundamentals of algebra, he found calculus difficult to such an extent that he had to withdraw from t

41、he course.The smoke was moving in such a way as to cover up the level prairie, until soon nothing was visible to our eyes except for a thick blanket of dense smoke.第22页，共70页。The audience was unable to find enjoyment in the final conclusion of the play, the part in which Ralph Barnes, a hero with adm

42、irable qualities which was quite respectable, suddenly turned abruptly into an evil villain with truly objectionable qualities.Sociologists have tried to make a determination as to why so many people who grow up in the upper classes have a tendency to become the sort of people who consistently ignor

43、e and break the law.The reason the people in Somalia do not achieve an understanding of the problems arising in the American economy is that they have never had the experience of living through a period in which prices have risen rapidly.To pay the tuition fees, we can ask our parents for money, or

44、we can borrow it from them now, and return it back after graduation.Many were drawn by her vitality, which was infectious.第23页，共70页。VI. 中国式英语（Chinese English）中国式英语即Chinese English，或Chinglish，是以汉语思维方式为出发点，用英汉词典上的单一词义，根据英语语法编造出来的英语句子。中国式英语在中国人之间可以勉强沟通，但在英语为母语的国家或人群中无法使用，或不能被接收。如果对这个定义理解不深，我们可以从反面看一看英式

45、汉语，即用英语思维写出来的汉语。下面是一个美国学生写给他的汉语老师的一封信：您好！杨老师：我是刘学生。我贵姓刘，您给了我的名字。您活在中国的时间太久，我们都很失去您。放假，没有学校了，我的中文不但快快的坏了，我的体重而且慢慢地大了。您的身体怎么样？天气在北京怎么办？今天是星期末，您必须在用朋友玩儿，我猜？或者，在做研究功课，勤勤奋奋？再次，我们真的失去您了。我们老老实实地希望您来美国回的早。请让我们认识您的飞翔号码，所以我们可以去飞机场一起把您拣回来。您的学生刘迈克 第24页，共70页。这篇文章顺藤摸瓜，按照他的美语思维复原他的英文原文：Dear Mr. Yang,How are you?My

46、 last name is Liu. You gave me this name. Youve been living in China too long. We all miss you. Now summer is here, and we dont have school. My Chinese is becoming poor, and I am gaining weight too. How are you?How do you find the weather in Beijing? Today is weekend. You must have been with your fr

47、iends, having fun, I guess? Or doing research work diligently?Again, we miss you indeed. We sincerely hope you will be back to the States soon.Please let us know your flight number so that we can go to the airport and pick you up. Your student, Mike Louis第25页，共70页。这篇美式汉语信很可笑。与之相反，中式英语给老外的印象绝对不会差多远。下

48、面是几种典型的中国式英语表达：A. 英汉词典式的挪用英汉词典对初学者来说，不失为较好地辅助工具。但对中、高级学生，英汉词典就弊大于利了。要准确表达思想并不是用简单的词典解释就可以完成。从下面的例子中可以看出正确与错误的用法：例1：我结婚三年了。 I have married for three years. 在汉语中，结婚可以直接和状语连用，但在英语中，“结婚”的含义是靠marry这个动词的动作和状态功能表示的。“I have married”表示结婚这一行为一直在持续，显然是错的。应该说：“I have been married for three years.”如果问“你结婚了吗？”应该说

49、“Are you married?”而不从直译的角度说，“Have you been married?”后者表示“你结过婚吗？”当然从礼节上最好不问对方这样的问题，特别当对方是女性时。比较下面几个有关结婚的用法： 第26页，共70页。我结婚了/我不再单身了。 I am married.凯瑟琳的婚姻是为了钱。Catherine married for money. 我妹妹正准备结婚。 My sister is getting married.他们去年结婚了。The couple got married last year. 当她说她要和她的老板结婚时，她的父母不高兴。 Her parents w

50、ere unhappy when she said she wanted to marry her boss.第27页，共70页。例2：麻烦将电视机打开，尼克斯队正和奇才队打比赛呢。Would you please open the TV and the Knicks are playing against the Wizards now in this seasons NBA. Open的确是“打开”之意，但正确的用法应该是switch/turn on the TV。在汉语中“开”的用法很多，不能随意将汉语的“开”用在所有地方。可以说“open the window”，但必须说：Turn o

51、n the light, switch on the computer, switch on the radio, drive a car类似的用法很多。例如，我在学校食堂吃饭。不能说成I eat the student dining hall. 而应该是：I eat meals at the campus cafeteria. 或I have my meals 第28页，共70页。下面几个使用了低频词的错误就不容易看出来：在费无极的挑唆下，楚平王还立即派了200精兵去搜捕伍子胥。 King Ping, moreover, upon the suggestion of Fei Wuji, di

52、spatched 200 picked troops to search for and arrest Wu Zixu. 要不，我誓必消灭楚国，亲手砍下他的脑袋！Otherwise Ill exterminate the State of Chu and take the kings head with my own hand!” Arrest是逮捕的意思。这里英语用capture比较恰当，当从汉语“搜捕”的含义上看，用hunt down更精炼些，“ dispatched 200 picked troops to hunto down Wu Zixu.”在第二句中，take有catch和acc

53、ept的含义。但在这里不合适，用chop off较合适，“ and chop off the kings head with my own hand!”他饿坏了，他妈妈给了他一些肉和饮料吃。 He was starving, and her mother gave him some flesh and drink. flesh - 野兽和人的肉，食用的肉应该是meat。第29页，共70页。我们下周二有一次考试，下周五还有两次。考完后，春季学期就结束了。 We are going to have one test next Tuesday and two more next Friday. Af

54、ter that, the spring semester will be over. test和examination有区别，test一般指能力测验，如an IQ test, an aptitude test, a driving test, a medical test, the Test of English as Foreign Language (TOEFL)。而examination一般指专业考试，如the geography exam, the physics exam, a final exam。当然examination也有检查之意。也只类似容易搞混的还有class - co

55、urse, college - university, hope - wish，例如：我急着去上课，晚些时候再和你谈吧。 I am in a rush heading for class now. I will talk to you later today. 第30页，共70页。上学时我们是同班同学。 We were in the same class at school. 这学期Joan注册了五门课，微积分、英语、普通物理、计算机和体育。 This semester Joan has signed up for five courses, calculus, English, genera

56、l physics, computer science, and physical education. 总的说来，我不喜欢这门课。但我必须承认，这位教授讲了几次很好的课。 Generally speaking I dont like this course. But some of the class sessions the professor conducted were good, I have to say. Stringer先生当大学女篮教练27年了。 For 27 years, Mr. Stringer has been coaching womens college baske

57、tball. 许多美国学生不看重大学教育，于是他们就退学，走上经商的职业道路。 Many American students do not believe in college education so they drop out to start their career in business. 大多数教师对学校管理制度上的调整很恼怒。Most of the university faculty members were angry about the recent changes in administration. I wish I were a little taller. 我希望要

58、是再高点就好了。他的妻子只能盼望为他的腿做的手术一切顺利。His wife had to hope that the operation on his leg would go well. 以上几个句子都是完全正确的说法。第31页，共70页。讲解：Class一般泛指“课”，而course指“课程”；college泛指大学和学院，而university指具体的某一所综合性大学；wish用于虚拟语气，表示不能实现的愿望，hope用于真实可实现的愿望。再如：如果你能提前告诉我你是否能来，我将非常感谢。 I would appreciate you very much if you could let

59、 me know in advance whether or not you will be coming. 这句话的错误很难被一般学生看出来。这个错误显然是受到thank用法的影响，直接使用了词典上的汉语词义，因为thank是直接接动作者的，如：Thank you. Thank them. 而appreciate虽也表示感谢，但其宾语一般应该是某个东西，而不是对方本人。这句话应这样说：I would appreciate it very much if you could let me know in advance whether or not you will be coming.类似的

60、用法如下：I appreciate it very much for your help. I appreciate your kindness of sending me a Christmas card. I appreciate all you have done for me. 第32页，共70页。我看到厨房柜台上有些老鼠屎。I saw some mouse dung on the kitchen counter. 尽管dung有粪便的意思，但这里该用mouse droppings。像小球一样的动物粪便应用droppings,如鸡屎用chicken droppings, 鸟屎用bird