2019年英文辞职报告模板是怎样的.doc

英文辞职报告模板是怎样的 DearMr.Smith, Asagraduateofaninstitutionofhighereducation,Ihaveafewverybasicexpectations.Chiefamongtheseisthatmydirectsuperiorshaveanintellectthatrangesabovethemongroundsquirrel.Afteryourconsistentandannoyingharassmentofmyco-workersandmeduringthemissionofourduties,Icanonlysurmisethatyouareoneofthefewtruegeicwastesofourtime. Askingme,aworkadministrator,toexplaineverylittlenuanceofeverythingIdoeachtimeyouhappentostrollintomyofficeisnotonlyawasteoftime,butalsoawasteofpreciousoxygen.IwashiredbecauseIknowhowtoworkputersystems,andyouwereapparentlyhiredtoprovideamusementtomyselfandotheremployees,whowatchyouvainlyattempttounderstandtheconceptofcutandpasteforthehundredthtime. Youwillneverunderstandputers.Somethingasincrediblysimpleasbinarystillgivesyoutoomanyoptions.Youwillalsoneverunderstandwhypeoplehateyou,butIamgoingtotryandexplainittoyou,eventhoughIamsurethiswillbejustaseffectiveastellingyouwhatanIPaddressis.YourshinynewiMachasmorepersonalitythanyoueverwill.copyrightdedecms Youwalkaroundthebuildingallday,shiftlesslylookingforfaultinothers.Youhaveasharpdressed,uselesslookaboutyouthatmayhaveworkedforyourinterview,butnowthatyouactuallyhaveresponsibility,youpawnitoffonoverworkedstaff,hopingtheirtalentwillcoverforyourglaringineptitude.Inaworldofmanagerialevolution,youaretheblue-greenalgaethateveryoneelseeatsandlaughsat.ManagerslikeyouareasadproofoftheDilbertprinciple. Sincethissituationisunlikelytochangewithoutyougettingafullfrontallobotomyreversal,Iamforcedtotendermyresignation.However,Ihaveafewpartingthoughts. 1.Whensomeonecallsyouinreferencetoemployment,itisillegalforyoutogivemeabadremendation.ThemostyoucansaytohurtmeisIprefernottoment.Iwillhavefriendsrandomlycallyouoverthenextcoupleofyearstokeepyouhonest,becauseIknowyouwouldbeunabletodoitonyourown. 2.Ihaveallthepasswordstoeveryaountonthesystem,andIknoweverypasswordyouhaveusedforthelastfiveyears.Ifyoudecidetogetcute,Iamgoingtopublishyourfavoriteslist,whichIconvenientlysavedwhenyoumademebackupyouruselessfiles.IdobelievethattermslikeLolitaarenotusuallyviewedfavorablybytheadministration. 3.WhenyouborrowedthedigitalcameratotakepicturesofyourMothersbirthday,youneglectedtomentionthatyouweregoingtotakepicturesofyourselfinthemirrornude.Thenyouforgottoerasethemlikethetechno-moronyoureallyare.SufficeittosayIhaveneverseensuchoddactswithasaucebottle,butIassureyouthatthosehavebeencopiedandkeptinsafeplacespendingtheauthoringofaglowingletterofremendation.(Trytouseaspellcheckplease;Ihatehavingtocorrectyourmistakes.) Thankyouforyourtime,andIexpecttheletterofremendationonmydeskby8:00amtomorrow.Onewordofthistoanybody,andallofyourlittletwistedrepugnantobsessionswillbeopentothepublic.Neverscrewwithyoursystemsadministrator.Why?Becausetheyknowwhatyoudowithallthatfreetime! Wishingyouagrandandgloriousday. Dear(thenameofyourboss), IregrettoinformyouthatIdecidedtoresignfrommypresentpositionas(position)witheffectivefrom(nextdayoflastdate). Thankyouforgivingmeachancetolearnandtogainthevaluableexperiencein(panynameandsectionworkwith).Ihopemyresignationwouldnotcauseyoumuchinconvenience. Thankyouforyourkindatt