简单的英语幽默小故事

简单的英语幽默小故事

1

Mr.Joneshadafewdays’holiday,sohesaid,“I’mgoingtogotothemountainsbytrain.”Heputonhisbestclothes,tookasmallbag,wenttothestationandgotonthetrain.Hehadabeautifulhat,andheoftenputhisheadoutofthewindowduringthetripandlookedatthemountains.Butthewindpulledhishatoff.

Mr.Jonesquicklytookhisoldbagandthrewthatoutofthewindowtoo.

Theotherpeopleinthecarriagelaughed.“Isyourbaggoingtobringyourbeautifulhatback?”theyasked.

“No,”Mr.Jonesanswered,“butthere’snonameandnoaddressinmyhat,andthere’sanameandaddressonthebag.Someone’sgoingtofindbothofthemneareachother,andhe’sgoingtosendmethebagandthehat.”

2

AnoldladywentoutshoppinglastTuesday.Shecametoabankandsawacarnearthedoor.Amangotoutofitandwentintothebank.Shelookedintothecar.Thekeyswereinthelock.

Theoldladytookthekeysandfollowedthemanintothebank.

Themantookagunoutofhispocketandsaidtotheclerk,“Givemeallthemoney.”

Buttheoldladydidnotseethis.Shewenttotheman,putthekeysinhishandandsaid,“Youngman,you’restupid!Neverleaveyourkeysinyourcar:someone’sgoingtostealit!”

Themanlookedattheoldwomanforafewseconds.Thenhelookedattheclerk—andthenhetookhiskeys,ranoutofthebank,gotintohiscaranddroveawayquickly,withoutanymoney.

3

MarywasanEnglishgirl,butshelivedinRome.Shewassixyearsold.Lastyearhermothersaidtoher,“You’resixyearsoldnow,Mary,andyou’regoingtobegingoingtoaschoolhere.You’regoingtolikeitverymuch,becauseit’saniceschool.”

“IsitanEnglishschool?”Maryasked.“Yes,itis,”hermothersaid.

Marywenttotheschool,andenjoyedherlessons.Hermotheralwaystookhertoschoolinthemorningandbroughtherhomeintheafternoon.LastMondayhermotherwenttotheschoolat4o’clock,andMaryranoutofherclass.

“We’vegotanewgirlinourclasstoday,Mummy,”shesaid.“She’ssixyearsoldtoo,andshe’sverynice,butsheisn’tEnglish.She’sGerman.”

“DoesshespeakEnglish?”Mary’smotherasked.“No,butshelaughsinEnglish,”M