2025年广东深圳高三一模英语读后续写写作指导课件

25年深一模读后续写讲评五四三法则

5R解读故事

4点确定框架3大续写原则1.

Readforcharacters人物2.

Readforconflict/problems问题/冲突3.

Readforplot情节4.

Readforemotionalchanges情感变化5.

Readfortheme主题5R解读故事

ThecarturnedontothefamiliarroadthatledtoGrandma’sfarm.“Jude,thissummerholidaywillbeagreatchanceforyoutostaywithyourgrandma,”Dadsaidashedrove.Everymoment,weweremovingfartherawayfromthecity,theplacewhereIknewhowtodothingsright.

Thecarenginewasn’toffbeforeGrandmahuggedme.Islowlydraggedmyselfoutofthecar.“Jude,youlookunhappy.Why?”Grandmaasked.Sheactedlikenothingbadhadhappenedlasttime.CouldIaskhowmuchmoneyherneighborMr.Jacksonhadlostbecauseofmymistake?Washestillupsetwithme?“I’mfine,”Ianswered.“I’mjustmissingmycomputercamp.ComputersaresomethingI’mgoodat.”“Thatsoundsdisappointing,”Grandmanodded.

IlikedvisitingthefarmduringbreaksbeforeImessedthingsuplastsummer.Grandmalivedalone,andMr.Jacksonwaslikefamilytoher.ThenonedayIforgottolockthegateandletthegoatsintohisflowerbeds.Helostalmostallhisrosesforthefarmers’market.

Now,backatthefarm,Ifeltnervous.IwastryingtohideintheroomwhenIsawMr.Jackson!HewasopeningthedoorandcallingGrandma.“Ineedhelp!”heyelledtoher.“Justasecondforthefreshlyharvestedroses!”Thatwaswhenhesawme.Ifeltmyhearttightenandwasreadyforhiscriticism.Ideservedit.Hehadprobablybeenwaitingforthismomentsincelastsummer.

However,Mr.Jacksongreetedmehappily,“Great,Judeishere!Yourgrandmaalwaystellsusyouareawonderfullycompetent(有能力的)computerprogrammer.”Ishookmyhead.“Iamnotcompetent.IamsorryImessedthingsup.”Hewassurprisedandcomfortedme,“Itwasanaccident.Beingcompetentdoesn'tmeanyounevermakemistakes.”

Ilookedoutofthewindow.Therewerepilesofroseswaitingtobesold.“Jude,canyouhelpus?Wewanttosellrosesonline.Wehaveacomputerandalltheparts(零件)forourinternetconnection,butwejustcan’tsetitup,”Grandmaasked.Nointernet.Theyseemedtoliveinthetwentiethcentury.Read(5R)—characters（人物画像）guilty(unhappy;nervous);beskilledincomputerloving;trustmeforgiving宽大的，宽容的Read(5R)—conflicts/problems（冲突）

ThecarturnedontothefamiliarroadthatledtoGrandma’sfarm.“Jude,thissummerholidaywillbeagreatchanceforyoutostaywithyourgrandma,”Dadsaidashedrove.Everymoment,weweremovingfartherawayfromthecity,theplacewhereIknewhowtodothingsright.

Thecarenginewasn’toffbeforeGrandmahuggedme.Islowlydraggedmyselfoutofthecar.“Jude,youlookunhappy.Why?”Grandmaasked.Sheactedlikenothingbadhadhappenedlasttime.CouldIaskhowmuchmoneyherneighborMr.Jacksonhadlostbecauseofmymistake?Washestillupsetwithme?“I’mfine,”Ianswered.“I’mjustmissingmycomputercamp.ComputersaresomethingI’mgoodat.”“Thatsoundsdisappointing,”Grandmanodded.

IlikedvisitingthefarmduringbreaksbeforeImessedthingsuplastsummer.Grandmalivedalone,andMr.Jacksonwaslikefamilytoher.ThenonedayIforgottolockthegateandletthegoatsintohisflowerbeds.Helostalmostallhisrosesforthefarmers’market.

Now,backatthefarm,Ifeltnervous.IwastryingtohideintheroomwhenIsawMr.Jackson!HewasopeningthedoorandcallingGrandma.“Ineedhelp!”heyelledtoher.“Justasecondforthefreshlyharvestedroses!”Thatwaswhenhesawme.Ifeltmyhearttightenandwasreadyforhiscriticism.Ideservedit.Hehadprobablybeenwaitingforthismomentsincelastsummer.

However,Mr.Jacksongreetedmehappily,“Great,Judeishere!Yourgrandmaalwaystellsusyouareawonderfullycompetent(有能力的)computerprogrammer.”Ishookmyhead.“Iamnotcompetent.IamsorryImessedthingsup.”Hewassurprisedandcomfortedme,“Itwasanaccident.Beingcompetentdoesn'tmeanyounevermakemistakes.”

Ilookedoutofthewindow.Therewerepilesofroseswaitingtobesold.“Jude,canyouhelpus?Wewanttosellrosesonline.Wehaveacomputerandalltheparts(零件)forourinternetconnection,butwejustcan’tsetitup,”Grandmaasked.Nointernet.Theyseemedtoliveinthetwentiethcentury.Conflict1:JudeaccidentallyletgoatsruinMr.Jackson’srosesandfearedwithMr.Jackson’sanger.Solution1:Mr.JacksongreetedJudehappilyandcomfortedhim,sayingitwasanaccident.Conflict2:GrandmaandMr.Jacksoncouldn’tsetuptheinternettosellrosesonline.Solution2:?BeginningClimaxEndingJudeandhisfatherdrovetograndma’sfarm.Lastsummer,Judeforgottolockthegate,andthegoatsrushedintotheMr.Jackson’sflowerbed,destroyinghisroses.WhenMr.Jacksoncameforhelp,Judethoughthewouldbecriticized.ButMr.Jacksongreetedhimhappilyandmentionedhiscompetenceincomputer.Para1：MaybeIcouldbesomeonewhowasreallycompetent.

Para2：

Withinafewhours,ordersforrosesfloodedin.Judeapologized,andMr.Jacksoncomfortedhim.GrandmaaskedJudetohelpsetupthenetworksothattheycouldsellrosesonline.backgroundRead(5R)—plot（情节）Judebegantothink.Read(5R)—emotionalchanges（情感变化）

ThecarturnedontothefamiliarroadthatledtoGrandma’sfarm.“Jude,thissummerholidaywillbeagreatchanceforyoutostaywithyourgrandma,”Dadsaidashedrove.Everymoment,weweremovingfartherawayfromthecity,theplacewhereIknewhowtodothingsright.

Thecarenginewasn’toffbeforeGrandmahuggedme.Islowlydraggedmyselfoutofthecar.“Jude,youlookunhappy.Why?”Grandmaasked.Sheactedlikenothingbadhadhappenedlasttime.CouldIaskhowmuchmoneyherneighborMr.Jacksonhadlostbecauseofmymistake?Washestillupsetwithme?“I’mfine,”Ianswered.“I’mjustmissingmycomputercamp.ComputersaresomethingI’mgoodat.”“Thatsoundsdisappointing,”Grandmanodded.

IlikedvisitingthefarmduringbreaksbeforeImessedthingsuplastsummer.Grandmalivedalone,andMr.Jacksonwaslikefamilytoher.ThenonedayIforgottolockthegateandletthegoatsintohisflowerbeds.Helostalmostallhisrosesforthefarmers’market.

Now,backatthefarm,Ifeltnervous.IwastryingtohideintheroomwhenIsawMr.Jackson!HewasopeningthedoorandcallingGrandma.“Ineedhelp!”heyelledtoher.“Justasecondforthefreshlyharvestedroses!”Thatwaswhenhesawme.Ifeltmyhearttightenandwasreadyforhiscriticism.Ideservedit.Hehadprobablybeenwaitingforthismomentsincelastsummer.

However,Mr.Jacksongreetedmehappily,“Great,Judeishere!Yourgrandmaalwaystellsusyouareawonderfullycompetent(有能力的)computerprogrammer.”Ishookmyhead.“Iamnotcompetent.IamsorryImessedthingsup.”Hewassurprisedandcomfortedme,“Itwasanaccident.Beingcompetentdoesn'tmeanyounevermakemistakes.”

Ilookedoutofthewindow.Therewerepilesofroseswaitingtobesold.“Jude,canyouhelpus?Wewanttosellrosesonline.Wehaveacomputerandalltheparts(零件)forourinternetconnection,butwejustcan’tsetitup,”Grandmaasked.Nointernet.Theyseemedtoliveinthetwentiethcentury.guiltynervous;fearfulsurprised;grateful

ThecarturnedontothefamiliarroadthatledtoGrandma’sfarm.“Jude,thissummerholidaywillbeagreatchanceforyoutostaywithyourgrandma,”Dadsaidashedrove.Everymoment,weweremovingfartherawayfromthecity,theplacewhereIknewhowtodothingsright.

Thecarenginewasn’toffbeforeGrandmahuggedme.Islowlydraggedmyselfoutofthecar.“Jude,youlookunhappy.Why?”Grandmaasked.Sheactedlikenothingbadhadhappenedlasttime.CouldIaskhowmuchmoneyherneighborMr.Jacksonhadlostbecauseofmymistake?Washestillupsetwithme?“I’mfine,”Ianswered.“I’mjustmissingmycomputercamp.ComputersaresomethingI’mgoodat.”“Thatsoundsdisappointing,”Grandmanodded.

IlikedvisitingthefarmduringbreaksbeforeImessedthingsuplastsummer.Grandmalivedalone,andMr.Jacksonwaslikefamilytoher.ThenonedayIforgottolockthegateandletthegoatsintohisflowerbeds.Helostalmostallhisrosesforthefarmers’market.

Now,backatthefarm,Ifeltnervous.IwastryingtohideintheroomwhenIsawMr.Jackson!HewasopeningthedoorandcallingGrandma.“Ineedhelp!”heyelledtoher.“Justasecondforthefreshlyharvestedroses!”Thatwaswhenhesawme.Ifeltmyhearttightenandwasreadyforhiscriticism.Ideservedit.Hehadprobablybeenwaitingforthismomentsincelastsummer.

However,Mr.Jacksongreetedmehappily,“Great,Judeishere!Yourgrandmaalwaystellsusyouareawonderfullycompetent(有能力的)computerprogrammer.”Ishookmyhead.“Iamnotcompetent.IamsorryImessedthingsup.”Hewassurprisedandcomfortedme,“Itwasanaccident.Beingcompetentdoesn'tmeanyounevermakemistakes.”

Ilookedoutofthewindow.Therewerepilesofroseswaitingtobesold.“Jude,canyouhelpus?Wewanttosellrosesonline.Wehaveacomputerandalltheparts(零件)forourinternetconnection,butwejustcan’tsetitup,”Grandmaasked.Nointernet.Theyseemedtoliveinthetwentiethcentury.Read(5R)—themes（主题）人与自我：成长与自我认知“有能力”并不是不犯错误，而是……在错误中成长在面对挫折时，勇于承担责任，找到自己的价值。4点确定情节框架

点1：位于续写第一段段首，流畅衔接前面的故事（常与原文最后一段呼应）和第一段段首语；点2：位于续写第一段段尾，流畅衔接第二段段首句；点3：位于续写第二段段首，续写衔接第二段段首语；点4：文章结尾升华，给予读者正能量，揭示和强调主题。1.

Action—Response原则2.

Conflict

—Solution原则3.

Negative

—Positive原则3大续写原则三大续写原则

1.

Action—Response原则：一个角色的所言、所行、所感和所想会引起其他角色的一系列反应。每段对话1-2句，不一定两个人都要说话，无声的动作也是一种response。三大续写原则2.

Conflict

—Solution原则：一般而言第二段会有问题的solution。（同时思考：能否在第一段出现一个问题，然后把它解决了或者没有解决。一方面是增加看点，另一方面也是给第二段作铺垫。）三大续写原则3.

Negative

—Positive原则：写作中一定要有情感的变化，无论前面是怎样的情感，最终都应该是积极的。

Para1:MaybeIcouldbesomeonewhowasreallycompetent.层次1：Jude克服自我怀疑，并决定帮助grandma和Mr.Jackson。层次2：Jude的具体行动，利用自己的计算机知识，成功搭建网络。层次3：利用网络发布玫瑰的销售信息，售卖玫瑰。Para2:Withinafewhours,ordersforrosesfloodedin.Think?Whyshouldwedesignsuchaplot?Think?Whyshouldwedesignsuchaplot?Para2:Withinafewhours,ordersforrosesfloodedin.层次1：描写grandma和Mr.Jackson的积极反应。（赞赏、认同、

表扬、感谢等）层次2：呼应原文，提及mistake；描写Jude的成长和收获。Jude从帮助他人中获得成就感，认识到犯错并不可怕，

只要弥补错误就能实现自己的价值。MaybeIcouldbesomeonewhowasreallycompetent.“Icandefinitelyhelpwiththat!Wherearetheparts?”FollowingGrandma,Iwentintotheroom,whereacomputersatsurroundedbysomescatteredparts.Rollingupmysleeves,Icarefullyconnectedeverything.Itwasapieceofcake（小菜一碟）tome.“Done!”Iannouncedconfidently.Afterafewadjustments,theinternetwasupandrunning.Nowitwastimetoselltheroses.Idecidedtostartfrommysocialmediaplatform.Iquicklyuploadedphotos,addeddescriptions,andsetprices.Beforelong,notificationsstartedshowingup—peoplewerenoticing.Myabilitiesmadeadifference!(96词)Withinafewhours,ordersforrosesfloodedin.“Thisisamazing,Jude!”Grandmacheeredwithjoyasshebeganbustling（匆匆忙忙的走；奔忙）about,packingflowers.Mr.Jacksonchuckled（轻声笑）warmlyashehandedmeanotherbunchtolabel.Theenergywaselectric（令人