福州市2010-2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达

书面表达指导特别注意：1）认真审题，确定体裁；2）把握要点，注意自然连贯；3）表达有效，适度发挥；要抓住文章的灵魂，即文章的内容要点，合情合理地发挥。4）特别要注意良好书写习惯的养成。福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第1页!书面表达

随着高考的临近，越来越多的学生开始焦虑，他们的健康问题引起越来越多人的关注。请你根据以下内容，以“青少年心理健康问题大家谈”为话题,给21世纪英文报投稿.福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第2页!注意:1.短文必须包括所有要点,可以适当发挥，行文连贯;2.短文开头已为你写好,不计入总词数;3.词数120左右。参考词汇:psychological心理(上)的

consultant提供咨询的专家（另注：少于100词，扣2分。）福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第3页!【参考范文】

Withthenationalentranceexaminationingon,moreandmoregraduatingstudentssufferfromvariouskindsofanxieties.Somecannoteatorsleepwellandfailtoconcentrateontheirstudies.Someareafraidoftakingexamsandothers

evenlosehopefortheirfuturelife.列举焦虑的现象，用Some….Some…andothers…平行结构，表达比较清晰，语气贯通。最后一点用even一词，说明焦虑的严重性需要引起大家的重视。福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第4页!Whatshouldwedotosolvetheseproblems?Inmyopinion,firstlyweshouldtakemoreexerciseandlearntorelaxourselves.Secondly,wearesupposedtotalktoourfriendsaboutourproblemsandseekadvicefrompsychologicalconsultants.Meanwhile,schoolsshouldsetupspecialofficestohelpstudentssolvetheirmentalproblems.Parentsshouldalsocaremoreaboutthementalhealthoftheirchildren.Onlybydoingsocanwesolvetheseproblems.(148words)如何解决焦虑的问题应是阐述的重点。范文根据所给的提示，针对第二段的causes，从students，schools，parents三方面提出了问题的解决之道。句首的设问句，给人留下思考的空间，也使短文更富有活力。firstly，secondly等表示顺序、时间（meanwhile）、递进（also）的连接词的使用使结构连贯、层次分明、脉络清晰。最后用倒装句结束短文，比较“给力”。福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第5页!2.没有适当、合情合理地发挥展开Whatcausestheproblems?Pressureistheroot.Asagrade-threestudent,thepressureesfrommanypartsofyourlife,suchasyourself,yourparents,andtheteachers(Whatpressure?)Parentsshouldtakecareabout(of)thefoodthegraduatingstudentseat.福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第6页!3)词类不分Andthatbeyondourreach.Andthatisbeyondourreach.(超出我们的承受能力)

4)缺乏一致Andalackofmunicationisanothercause,whichcontributetomorenerves/nervousness/anxiety.contributestoAsastudent,weshouldarrangeourtimewell.students5)中式英语Sohowshouldwedotodealwiththeproblem?what6)成分残缺;残缺句Sowhatisthecausemakethemfeelsodown?Sowhatisthecausethatmakesthemfeelsodown(anxious)?Therearethreemaincausesleadtotheproblem.FirstthepressurefromendlesshomeworkwhichmayexhaustthemoutTherearethreemaincausesleadingtotheproblem.Thefirstisthepressurefromendlesshomework,whichmayexhaustthem/wear(tire)themout.福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第7页!内容要点de不同方式表达1.焦虑现象范文：Somecannoteatorsleepwellandfailtoconcentrateontheirstudies.Someareafraidoftakingexamsandothersevenlosehopefortheirfuturelife.其它：

Someworryaboutthefailureofatest(theirfailuretopasstheexam/examinationfailure/failureintheexamination).Iftheydon’tperformwellinatest,theymaylosetheirappetiteorcan’tsleepwellin(the)night(或atnight).Someseemtoforgeteverythingwhentheyaretakinganexam.福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第8页!2.焦虑的起因范文：Thecausesofthementalproblemsabovemayincludetoomuchschoolwork,highexpectationsfromtheteachersandtheparentsandlackofphysicalexerciseandmunication.其它：Thecauseofanxietyispushyparents’highexpectationsandpressureforacademicachievement.…isthatparentsexpecttoomuchfromtheirchildren.…isthatparentsexpecthighstandardsfromtheirchildren.Anxietyisdirectlyrelatedtoacademicdifficultiesamongsomestudents.福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第9页!其它：Whatarethecausesoftheproblem(problemsmentionedabove)?......Secondlylackofmunicationwithotherscancauseteenagers’anxieties.(Nowadays)Studentsaretoobusywiththeirhomeworktotalkwiththeirparents,friendsandteachers.(刘烁洁)福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第10页!学生方面：Westudentsshouldlearntobeconfidentwhenfacinganychallenges.Wecanalsoturntopsychologicalconsultantsforhelp.()Westudentscanmunicatewithpsychologicalconsultantstoseekforsomesolutionstoourproblems.Weshouldn’talwaysthinkexamsarewhatlifeisallabout（人生不只是考试）.（）Westudentsshouldadjustourattitudetowardstheexamination.Itisonlyofthemanychallengesinourlifeandwedon’tneedtobenervous.()福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第11页!家长方面：范文：Parentsshouldalsocaremoreaboutthementalhealthoftheirchildren.其它：Asforparents,theyhadbettermunicatewiththeirchildrenanddon’ttrytobepushy(急于求成；执意强求的

).()Parentsshouldencouragetheirchildrenmoreandhelptorelievetheirpressure.()copewith应付/reducetheirpressurerelievethemfromanxiety消除忧虑福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第12页!Thecausesofthementalproblems

above

mayincludetoomuchschoolwork,highexpectationsfromtheteachersandtheparentsandlackofphysicalexerciseandmunication.说明焦虑的起因，用三个并列的名词短语，表达简练。简单的一个above起到了承上的作用。句中用了may一词，可以避免给人主观臆断的感觉。同时范文对pressure具体化的拓展，使内容相对饱满。福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第13页!问题与错误1.审题问题：

此点重点在于写phenomena，即焦虑现象（焦虑的表现形式），不能只写焦虑什么。Somefeelworriedthattheywillperformbadlyintheexam.Someworryabouttheresultsoftheexamination,whicharevitalforthemsincethisdeterminestheirfutureadmissiontoahighqualityuniversity.范文：Somecannoteatorsleepwellandfailtoconcentrateontheirstudies.Someareafraidoftakingexamsandothersevenlosehopefortheirfuturelife.福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第14页!3.词法、句法、语法等错误不胜枚举，仅列举些许：1)用词不当First,pressurefromtheirparentsisthemostimportantreason(cause).2)搭配/用法错误Whydotheyworrysomanythings?worryworryabout/overworry(that)-clausebeworriedabout/by/(that)-clauseManystudentslackofmunication.lackmunication.(A)lackofmunicationwithothersisblamedfortheiranxiety.

Therearetoomanythingsbeingworried.

Therearetoomanythingstoworryabout.

福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第15页!7)悬垂修饰语:错用非谓语等形式，和主语不能构成逻辑关系Inordertoreducetheanxieties,herearesomesolutions.

Inordertoreducetheanxieties,Ipropose/putforward/suggestsomesolutions.8)接排句(句子之间没有标点符号和句间连接词或用逗号连接）：Someofthemareworriedabouttheirstudy,

theyareafraidoffailingintheexamination.Someofthemareworriedabouttheirstudyand(theyare)afraidoffailingintheexamination.Someofthemareworriedabouttheirstudy.Theyareafraidoffailingintheexamination.福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第16页!其它：

Somearetroubledbythegapsbetweentheirparentsandthemselves,leadingtotheargumentsintheirdailylife.Somearetroubledbyabadmood,leadingtotheargumentsintheirdailylife.Somestudentsaresoworriedthattheycouldn'tsleepwellatnight.Somestudentsareafraidofexaminationsbecausetheygetpoorgradesalways.Somestudentsevenwanttomitsuicidewhentheyfailintheexam.Somestudentsaresoworriedthattheycan’tsleepwellatnight.Somestudentsareafraidofexaminationsbecausetheyalwaysgetpoorgrades.Andsomeothersevenwanttomitsuicidewhentheyfailintheexam.福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第17页!其它：Whatcausesustobeanxious?Thepressurefromthewholefamilymayplaythemainrole.Theirexpectationissometimestoohighforustoliveupto(达到

)

What’smore,lackofmunicationincreasesouranxieties.What’smore,lackofmunicationisanotherbigproblem.Wecanimaginehowawful(人）不舒服的；不安的

)weareifwekeepallthesadnesstoourselves.()福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第18页!3.解决办法学生方面：范文：Inmyopinion,firstlyweshouldtakemoreexerciseandlearntorelaxourselves.Secondly,wearesupposedtotalktoourfriendsaboutourproblemsandseekadvicefrompsychologicalconsultants.其它：Westudentsshouldlearntolaughinthefaceof

anxieties(笑对焦虑)andsmileatourselves.We’llfeelbetterifwehaveconfidenceinourselves.Ifnecessary,wecanturntopsychologicalconsultants.()Facingtheaboveproblems,weoughttofindsomeeffectivemeasurestocopewiththem.Firstofall,westudentsmustlearntorelaxourselvesthroughdoingsomesports,listeningtomusicandsoon.“Allworkand

noplaymakesJackadullboy,

(只工作，不玩耍，聪明小伙也变傻。)”asoldsayinggoes.()福州市2010—2011学年末高三质量检查书面表达共21页，您现在浏览的是第19页!学校方面：范文：Meanwhile,schoolsshouldsetupspecialofficestohelpstudentssolvetheirmentalproblems.其它：Somepreventi