【公开课课件】读后续写9

1、读后续写评分标准给分原则学生问题应对策略 一原卷原文及要求 第二节第二节 读后续写读后续写(满分满分 25 分分) 67. 阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。A couple of months before I started high school, my parents gave me the greatest gift any teenage boy could ask for: a cellphone. I lived on that phone all summer with my face buried in its screen. I texted w

2、ith every friend who was lucky enough to have a texting plan. I ignored my family and my surroundings. Being connected was more important than being present.So, you can imagine my displeasure when l learned what my dad had planned for our family vacation that year. “This year,” my dad said, “well be

3、 doing something special. Were going camping!” His excitement was met with a disappointed sigh. It wasnt my dream vacation, but I remained unbothered throughout the packing and planning. My mind was on my phone. I was so buried in the screen, in fact, that the first time I can remember truly looking

4、 up was when we drove across a bridge on the way to our campsite.I stared out the window and saw redwoods towering above us, their branches threatening to pierce (刺破) the blue sky. I saw a roaring river, with slivers of silky black water appearing between crashing white rapids. The air blowing into

5、the car from the open windows was hot and smelled of pine. But none of that mattered to me. The reason I had looked up was for something far more serious. My phone no longer had service.The last hour of the drive was increasingly tense. My dad announced that he had chosen a campsite that had no cell

6、 service, and that my phone would be useless until we returned home. I would be trapped in the forest for four days with no way to contact the outside world! I went through the full cycle of teenage emotions during the first day of the trip. I raged ( 发怒). I bargained. I begged. I flip-flopped (转变)

7、from a depressive state to anger and back. I went to bed angry that night. But when I awoke in the morning, something had changed. 注意： 1.续写词数应为150左右； 2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。 Paragraph 1:Instead of burying myself in my phone, I focused on something else: my surroundings. _ Paragraph 2:The next four days

8、 passed in a flash with many fun activities. _二、写作正评的评分标准、给分原则、学生问题及应对策略。 读后续写： 1.评分标准 内容要点定档次；语言表达见高低；篇章结构、衔接、书写、卷面做微调。 认真理解第一段提供的首句Insteadofburyingmyselfinmyphone,Ifocusedonsomethingelse:mysurroundings.围绕surroundings（3T：things、thoughts&touched等3个要点）进行描述；第二段提供的首句Thenextfourdayspassedinaflashwit

9、hmanyfunactivities.围绕所做activities、效果result及升华theme（art）等3个要点，有三联（联系、连贯、联想），最后要有主题升华（1个要点）（手机不重要，重要的是和家人一起共享自然的快乐时光）（共7个要点）。 续写的主题必须是正能量的biglove。 认真阅读原文明确情节和情感发展（depressive、anger到peace到excitement最后到grateful）过程。 语言表达要丰富。 续写的步骤要求（1.联系原文。2.前后连贯。3.要有合理性。） 2.给分原则 五档划分： 第五档（21-25分占9%）：内容要点齐全，语言表达丰富，卷面整洁清晰。

10、 第四档（16-20分占32%）：内容要点齐全，用复合句表达允许些须小错或者用简单句表达基本正确。 第三档（11-15分占23%）：内容要点有遗漏，有一定的逻辑，续写基本完整，用简单词汇和语法结构。 第二档（6-10分占12%）：续写内容不完整，错误较多。 第一档（1-5占9%）：与原文内容、情景基本脱节。 0分占15%。 字数不够酌情扣分，字数超过不扣分。 文章至少2评，相差3分以上需要三评，再差3分需要四评。 评卷均速45秒；均分14分和15分（除0分外）3.学生问题：4.应对策略： 1.内容要点为王时代来临，内容要点一定要涵盖，即便词汇表达不熟，也不能偏离这条主线和要求，只要有要点，单词

11、拼错句子不通也好酌情给分，偏离内容要求，文章语言书写卷面再好都不给分，教师在平时改卷的过程中也要遵循这个原则。 2.建议学生在平时考试时在内容要求的关键单词下用点标注出来，以便加强内容要求的意识，也方便教师给分。 3.写作是介于书面表达和语文作文间的一种题型，书面表达更注重语言表达，语文作文更注重内容的创新和思想的升华，而写作注重的是内容要点要忠言原文，再看语言表达和卷面书写等。写作非作文，不能随意发挥。写作要数理化，内容要点关键词最重要。 4.建议学校使用这次适应性考试的网上评卷系统“海云天科技”seaskyland，里边的数据可以更符合高考改卷的各项数据。 2021-20222021-20

12、22学年仙游私立一中高三上学期期中考英语试卷学年仙游私立一中高三上学期期中考英语试卷 读后续写读思言教学设计读后续写读思言教学设计福建省仙游县私立一中傅章兴 编者按：编者按：2021年初8省联考首现读后续写。本堂课以2021-2022学年仙游私立一中高三上学期期中考英语试卷为教材，展示读后续写的读思言设计思路：以产出为导向，指导学生理解人物、梳理情节、抓住要点，使之承上启下、言之成理、顺理成章。 67. 阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。（原文略） 文本分析：文本分析：叙事文，全文5段349词（不含续写首句），作者讲述自己高中阶段从极度依赖手机到亲近自然回归亲情，享受

13、和家人在一起的美好时光的蜕变过程。故事一波三折：先是父母给自己买完手机自己沉迷其中从而淡化亲情远离自然；接着因父亲要安排野营，不能再玩手机而不悦；然后由于网络等客观条件限制，自己只能被动接触手机以外的事物；最后作者在亲近自然和家人的过程中发现，觉得最重要的事莫过于感恩亲人和大自然，而非自己一直沉迷的手机。 教学过程：教学过程： 读：读全文读：读全文解人物解人物理情节理情节 持续默读5-6分钟，边读边勾画书写故事人物和情节。读后回答若干问题。 Q1: What is the story about? A: The story is about a high student who changes

14、 his attitude to a cellphone. Q2: How many people are there in the story? What do you think of them? A: The father and the son. I think the father is smart and considerate and the son is the one who acknowledges wrong and then corrects himself immediately though sometimes emotional. Q3: How did the

15、father solve his sons problem of cellphone addiction? A: His dad planned for his family vacation that year. His sons phone no longer had service. when the son awoke in the next morning, something had changed. 思：析首句思：析首句抓要点抓要点搭支架搭支架 第一段首句Insteadofburyingmyselfinmyphone,Ifocusedonsomethingelse:mysurro

16、undings.surroundings是切入点，有很大的想象空间。围绕surroundings（3T：things、thoughts&touched等3个要点）进行描述； 第二段首句Thenextfourdayspassedinaflashwithmanyfunactivities.围绕所做activities、效果result及升华theme（art）等3个要点，进行描述。 有三联（联系、连贯、联想），最后要有主题升华（1个要点）（手机不重要，重要的是和家人一起共享自然的快乐时光） （共7个要点） 。 续写的主题必须是正能量的biglove。 认真阅读原文明确情节和情感发展（dep

17、ressive、anger到peace到excitement最后到grateful）过程。 语言表达要丰富。 续写的步骤要求（1.联系原文。2.前后连贯。3.要有合理性。） 教师组织Pairwork或Groupwork。 第一段：就Insteadofburyingmyselfinmyphone,Ifocusedonsomethingelse:mysurroundings.展开讨论、记录内容要点； 第二段，就Thenextfourdayspassedinaflashwithmanyfunactivities.以同样活动方式说出所见所思所感、写出关键词语。 言：设任务言：设任务写续文写续文评习作评

18、习作 根据前文本、2个提示句与思环节内容支架，续写2段话，词数150左右，15分钟完成。 范文： 第二节读后续写(满分25分) Para 1: Instead of burying myself in my phone, l focused on something else: my surroundings. I let the noise of the wilderness wash over me, animals and bugs（以上为things） creating a ruckus that was both loud and serene at the same time. M

19、y anger turned to peace, then little interest and, finally, excitement（以上为thoughts）. Standing on the high campsite, I felt the weight of stress melt from my shoulders as I viewed the vast expanse that unfolded below me. The sight that met my startled（touched） eyes nearly took my breath away. For the first time, I thought camping in a place that had no cell s