2025年高考英语复习应用文写作与读后续写精讲精练26.读后续写微技巧4(冲突的预设与解决设计)

冲突的预设与解决设计

故事冲突的作用及宏观设计策略

1.什么是故事

故事是在一件事件中突发的“事故”，即在一件看似平常的事件中去设置误会或制造障碍，使这个平常

事件产生戏剧性的矛盾冲突与悬念，以设置矛盾---制造障碍----激化高潮为基本创作模式，决不能让故事一

帆风顺走下去。而悬念的设计就体现在个人的矛盾冲突之中，但必须做到合乎自然且在情理之中，又在让

人有感于意料之外，则所制造的误会或障碍都必须符合自然生活与常理。

2.故事的冲突是什么

冲突是小说的一个必要的元素。剧作家伊利亚.卡赞把冲突比喻为“两条狗抢一根骨头”。威廉.福克

纳提出冲突既存在于角色本身，也存在于角色之间。换言之，冲突的表现可以分为两个层次，一个是阻碍

故事主人公前行的外部障碍；另一种是潜在于主人公内心的矛盾。没有冲突就没有故事，因此从“冲突”

这一角度解读小说，有利于帮助学生更好地理解故事的情节发展过程，更深刻地读懂故事。按照朱光潜先

生对黑格尔美学中关于人物性格冲突理论的梳理，理想的冲突的情境却起于人的行动本身，起于两种同是

普遍永恒的力量的斗争，冲突所揭露的矛盾中每一对立面还是必须带有理想的烙印，因此冲突中不能没有

理性。

冲突的原意是两种力量的对抗，在故事创作中，冲突是使情节富有张力，吸引读者注意力的重要元素，

一般表现为人物在追求目标过程中所遭遇的阻力和压力。例如，人物内心矛盾冲突是故事中的某一人物（往

往是主要人物），在面对某一突发事件时出现困惑、疑难、困难与危机之中所产生的心里纠结。其在面对某

一事件中左右为难，难于决断而产生的内心犹豫与挣扎，构成了个人的内心矛盾冲突，这种个人内心矛盾

冲突是故事中常见的表现手法。在故事阅读中，我们需要问如下问题：在这个故事中，冲突的表现是什么？

你在哪些故事中看到过类似的冲突？这种冲突造成了怎样的阅读体验？

3.读后续写的冲突是怎样的

读后续写首先力争读懂原文，找出记叙文的几要素，找到故事情节中到底有什么冲突或问题。然后读

懂需要续写的两段的首句，根据首句推测故事发展的走向和两段的大致内容。读后续写的文章属于叙事类

文体，大部分故事都是围绕conflict（冲突）和solution（问题解决）来运转的，因此矛盾冲突在叙事类读后

续写语篇中尤为重要。

矛盾冲突的解决能推动故事情节的发展。矛盾冲突分预设与解决技巧，可以帮助学生在基于篇章主题

意义下更好地发散思维，做到有话可说，有事可写。同时，在学生创设矛盾冲突进行续写的过程中，可以

联系上文已有的故事冲突，提高故事的完整性和连贯性。学生掌握了矛盾冲突的基本写作技巧，有利于在

续写的故事创作中打开思路，提高语言的综合运用能力。

4.续写冲突宏观策略有哪些

读后续写的文章属于叙事类文体，矛盾冲突在叙事类文体中尤为重要。以下就是茅盾冲突续写常用的

宏观策略：

（1）分析冲突起因，了解背景：让学生对该故事的情节内容有大概地了解，通过找到每个部分的人

物和故事发生地点，并且关注每个部分发生的事，引导学生概括出本文的大意，从而了解故事冲突的原

因，也就是故事的背景。

（2）进入故事场景，直面冲突：细读文本，了解、感受到人物内心的矛盾，这是冲突的其中一个层次

---存在于角色本身的矛盾。同时，体会人物在冲突的问题上截然不同的态度，这是故事冲突的另一个层

次---阻碍人物的外部障碍，即存在于角色之外的矛盾。

（3）转移故事场景，解决冲突：冲突的解决并不是只有一个结局，冲突的解决多半追求的是让矛盾双

方和谐共处。学生需要针对预设的故事冲突的解决与故事的结局，找出人物面对各种冲突所采取的行动。

（4）生成故事场景，填补冲突：作品的结束常常以矛盾的结束来象征故事的结束。矛盾结束的方式主

要有以矛盾双方和解而结束，以矛盾第三方的介入而结束，以矛盾双方分裂结束等。可以在结局出现需要

设置相应的场景。通过场景的设置，学生可以巩固写作技巧，同时也对冲突解决进行了横向延伸。

故事冲突的预设与解决的微观技巧

技巧1：面对问题，人物产生的消极或积极情绪

【技巧举例】

（2021年6月，浙江高考，Para.1）Thepaydayarrivedatlast.Iwasdelightedtofinallygetthepaymentafter

Iworkedhardfortwoweeks.Onthewayhomefullofexcitement,Ithoughtabouthowtomakeuseofthe“huge”

sumofmoney.“Ineededanewfootballinthefuture.”Iwhisperedtomyself.Approachingmyhouse,Inoticedmy

dadandmomstandingbesidetheoldtruckofmyfamily,lookingsad.Itseemedasifsomethingwronghad

happened......

【分析】续写第一段中的“Onthewayhomefullofexcitement”表明了故事主人公心情非常好，但是当面

对新的问题“mydadandmomstandingbesidetheoldtruckofmyfamily,lookingsad”时，故事主人公内心开

始出现冲突与疑问，这就反映在“somethingwrong”上面。两种心态的冲突描写前后衔接自然、且恰到好

处。

【用语储备】

“感到一阵……”：feelaflushof...=feelawaveof...=feelafeeling/senseof...[joy(高兴),excitement(兴奋),

pride(骄傲),anger(愤怒),rage(狂怒),panic(惊慌),alarm(惊慌),terror(恐惧),horror(恐惧),fear(恐惧),unease

(不安),sorrow(悲伤),sadness(悲伤),grief(悲伤),embarrassment(尴尬),disappointment(失望),shame(羞愧),

guilt(愧疚)]。

例如：Shefeltawaveofpanic,butforcedherselftoleavetheroomcalmly.

她感到一阵惊慌，但是强迫自己镇静地离开了房间。

技巧2：面对复杂的情境，人物产生急迫/复杂的心理

【技巧举例】

（2021年1月，浙江高考，Para.2）ThevideowaspostedonlinetheMondaybeforeHalloween.Ilookedjust

likeapumpkinheadinit.Embarrassedandalittleannoyed,Ifledtomyroom,butMomstoppedme.“Youhaven’t

readthecommentsyet.”IscrolleddownthescreenandmarveledatthestoriestheviewerssharedaboutHalloween.

【分析】续写第二段首句提示语提供了一个新的情境，即“Thevideowaspostedonline”，这让故事主人

公内心冲突加剧（Embarrassedandalittleannoyed），但当听力母亲的话之后，主人公开始阅读网上的评论，

这又将主人公引向另一情境，结果主人公内心又起了变化（marveled）。情境的不断变换，加剧了故事主人

公内心的矛盾冲突的不断变换。

【用语储备】

（1）心里想：think/saytooneself

（2）害怕；恐慌：withfear/panic/terror;tremble;shiver;shake;quake;tremblewithfear;beseizedwithpanic;

screamwithpanic/terror;freeze/shakewithterror

（3）生气；愤怒：withrage;bered-cheekedwithrage;tremble/shakewithrage;feellikecryingwithrage;be

speechlesswithrage;beboilingwithrage

（4）兴奋；激动：withexcitement;yellwithexcitement;jumpupanddownwithexcitement;screamwith

excitement;gowildwithexcitement

（5）悲伤；流泪：Tearsblurredone’seyes.泪水模糊了她的双眼。/One’seyesgotmisty.一个人的眼睛都模糊

了。/One’seyesmisted/dimmedwithtears.泪眼模糊。/tearsrolldownone’seyes/cheeks/face泪水落下

技巧3：面对他人的行为或行动，人物展开了新的动作/行为

【技巧举例】

(2021年，新高考I卷，Para.2）Thetwinscarriedthebreakfastupstairsandwoketheirmotherup.Whentheir

mothersawthedeliciousandperfectbreakfastinfrontofher,shewasverysurprised.Itwasnotonlythegift,but

theloveofthechildrenforherthatmovedherverymuch.Thetwochildrencouldfinishcookingabreakfast,which

shedidn’texpect.Thechildrensaidloudly,“HappyMother’sDay!”Motherhuggedthemtightlyandkissedthem

againandagain.

【分析】续写第二段中，当双胞胎叫醒母亲（woketheirmotherup）后，母亲的动作首先有“saw”和“was

verysurprised”，之后在双胞胎发出节日问候“HappyMother’sDay”时，母亲的动作有“hugged”和“kissed”。

这种“动作主动应对”模式在休息的故事情节冲突拓展过程中是比较重要的，因为动作上的变化往往承载

了人物对情节中的矛盾冲突的回应模式及态度。

【用语储备】

（1）常用词语：openone’smouth;widenone’seyes;risetoone’sfeet;jumptoone’sfeet;shoutatthetopofone’s

lung;reachout（伸出手）

（2）常用句式：如：Havingpassedtheexam,hewassohappythathewasatalosswhattodo.通过考试后，他

非常高兴，不知所措。

Sheopenedthegiftwithherhandsshakingslightly.她用轻微颤抖的手打开了礼物。

技巧4：人物沉浸在某一情境中，于是出现了新问题

【技巧举例】

（2018年6月，浙江高考,Para.1）Suddenlyalittlerabbitjumpedoutinfrontofmyhorse.Myhorseturnedto

thelefttoavoidthelittlerabbitasIheldontightlyandtriednottofall.Thenmydadturnedaroundandshouted,

“Holdon!”Allofasuddenthehorsebegantorun.Mydadtriedtokeepupbehindus.Forafewminutesmyhorse

sloweddowntoatrotandthenstoppedbesideariver.Ilookedaroundandrealizedthatwewerewayoffthetrack.

【分析】续写第一段首句承接源语篇提供了一个新的情境，即“rabbitjumpedout”，从而引发了马与人的一

系列的避险动作，并且马由于受惊而奔跑起来，最终将主人公带入了另一个困境，即“wewerewayoffthe

track”。

【用语储备】

（1）不幸的是(unfortunately)

Butbadluckforsb,...但是某人真不走运

Shetriedherbest,butinvain.她尽力了，但没有成功。

（2）某人做了某事，不知道下一步该做什么。

Sbdidsth,wonderingwhattodonext.

Sbdidsth,notknowingwhattodonext.

技巧5：情况好转或情境向好，人物突然有了一个想法

【技巧举例】

（2020年7月，浙江高考，Para.2）Atthatverymoment,thehelicopterarrived.MyheartleapedwithjoyasI

knewwewerelikelytobesaved.Elliusedpeppersprayagaintobuyusenoughtime.Butthistimethebearbecame

morealert.Heregardeduswiththemercilessnecessityofhunger,sowethrowallthefoodwehave.Hethenturned

awayandstarteddevouring.Aswewereclimbingtheropeladder,Elliprayedlikethousandtimestoshow

thankfulnessofbeingsafeandsound.

【分析】续写第二段首句预设了一个新的情境“thehelicopterarrived”，于是故事主人公的心情好转（Myheart

leapedwithjoy），并且当再次遇到熊的攻击时，主人公就又有了新的想法（wethrowallthefoodwehave），

这将故事的冲突与发展带到另一个情境中；此外，当获救后，主人公又开始感谢（Elliprayedlikethousand

timestoshowthankfulnessofbeingsafeandsound）。可见，用新的想法接续“情况好转”可以充分展现人物

对整个事件的回应过程中的特写镜头。

【用语储备】

“某人突然想到……”：Itsuddenlyoccurredtosbthat...=Ithitsbthat...=Itstrucksbthat...=Itdawnedonsbthat...

技巧6：面对他人的鼓励/激励/帮助等，人物找到了解决办法

【技巧举例】

（2017年6月，浙江高考,Para.2）Afewminuteslater,theothertwocyclistsarrived.Theyfoundthedangerous

situation,wherethreemencircledthewolf.Mac'sfriendsalsojumpedofftheirbicyclesandjoinedthefightwith

thewolf.Moreandmorecarsstopped.Somedriverstookoutthesticksfromthecars,andsometookouttheknives,

eventhegunstowardsthewolf.Inthemeanwhile,thewolfmightfeelthepeople'sthreatsaround,soitbeganto

stepbackslowly.Soon,itranawayofftheroadanddisappearedinthedistance.

【分析】续写第二段首句提示给出了来帮忙的人（theothertwocyclistsarrived），之后又不断有人加入

（Mac'sfriendsalsojumpedofftheirbicycles/Moreandmorecarsstopped），故事中的人物有了一系列与狼对抗

的动作，如“circledthewolf”“tookoutthesticksfromthecars”“tookouttheknives”等，这些将故事中人狼

对峙的冲突进一步推向高潮。

【用语储备】

（1）鼓起勇气(做某事):take/gather/one’scourage(todosth)

（2）毫不犹豫/选择：withoutasecondthought/withoutdelay/withouthesitation/havingnochoice

技巧7：获得新的成长，人物开始总结、点题并呼应前文

【技巧举例】

（2022年1月，浙江卷,Para.2）OnedayIgotwordthathewasadmittedtohospitalforaseriousdisease.Ifelt

sosorrytohearthatandIthoughtIshouldvisithiminanycase.HewasalittlesurprisedtoseemewhenIstepped

intohiswardwithsomeflowersandfruits.Iofferedtodotherestworkofourprojectandheinvitedmetoshare

myideastoperfectit.Webegantoworkasafineteamandfinallyfinishedourprojectontime.Ourhardworkpaid

offandDr.Henderson’swasverysatisfiedwithourwonderfulfindings.Fromthisproject,wealsolearnedthe

significanceofteammates.Justasthesayinggoes,onepersoncangofar,butagroupofpersonscantravelfarther.

【分析】续写第二段中主人公最后发现能与队友和谐相处并最终完成了项目（Webegantoworkasafine

teamandfinallyfinishedourprojectontime），这引发了主人公的反响，并且主人公的这种体验不断地深入（从

“wealsolearnedthesignificanceofteammates”到“agroupofpersonscantravelfarther”），充分展现了主人公

内心的矛盾冲突从不断激化到出现转机、再到一步步迎刃而解的过程。

【用语储备】

（1）直到……才意识到……

倒装句：Notuntil...didsbrealize/noticethat...

强调句：Itwasonly...thatsbrealizedthat...

（2）表达经历与教训

WhatavaluablelessonIhavelearnedfrom...!我从……中得到了宝贵的教训。

Whatanunforgettableexperience!多么难忘的经历啊!

（3）结尾点题

Godhelpsthosewhohelpthemselves.天助自助者。

Everyoneisthearchitectofhisownfate.每个人都是自己命运的建筑师。

Lifeisfulloflaughterandtears.Onlybyacceptingbothcanweenjoylife.生命就是充满欢笑和泪水的。只有

同时接受两者，我们才能享受生活。

Neverunderestimatethepowerofyouraction.永远不要低估你的行为的力量。

【拓展训练】

1．阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。

Sarahhadunspeakablepainbecauseshehadtoraiseherchildrenalone.Butovertime,shechangedtoo

much,lookingskinnyinthemirror,withdarkbagsunderhereyes.Sheknewshehadtostopburningherselfout

beforeitwastoolate.Sosheemailedhermanagerthatshewastakinganurgentdayoff.

Ithadtobethebestdayever.Sarahhatedinstantcoffeebutdidn’thavetimeforanythingelse.Butnotnow.

Sarahplacedherfavoritecoffeemakeronthestoveandwalkedtothekitchenwindowsill,enjoyinghercompany

whenherphonerangloudlyfromherbedroom.“Yes?”“Hello,Sarah!Howareyoudoing?”“Natalie?Oh,my

goodness!Isthisreallyyou?”…NataliewasSarah’sfriend,butthey’dlosttouchafterNatalieandherhusband

movedtoEurope.Unfortunately,Sarahgotsocarriedawaybytheconversationthatshecompletelyforgotabout

hercoffeeonthestove.Theweatherturnedharsh,andstrongwindsblewthewindowcurtaintowardthestove,

causingittocatchfire.Sarahputthephonedownimmediatelywhenshesmelledsomethingburningandthesmoke

causedhertocough.

Sarah’shousewasreducedtoapileofcharredwreckage(残骸).Herneighborslookedatherpityinglyand

offeredtoshelterheruntilshecouldfindaplacetolive.ButSarahcouldn’ttaketheirfavor.Sheknewnoone

wantedtoseeaswarmofchildrenathome,especiallyinthecurrenteconomy.Sarahandherchildrenhadbeen

draggedtoashelterinthestreet.

Afewmonthslater,itwasSarah’sbirthday.Shedecidedtotakeherchildrenoutforagoodlunchandthen

getbacktoherwork.Buttheydidn’twanttoandhadastrangerequest.Theyblindfolded(蒙住眼睛)her,guiding

heroutofthehouse.Sarahhadnocluewhatherchildrenhadplannedforher.Sheknewtheywereheading

somewherefarfromthehomelesssheltersincetheywereonabusatsomepoint.

注意：

1.续写词数应为150左右；

2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。

AsSarahdidremovetheblindfold,herhandswenttohermouthinshock.

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Herneighborshadactuallybuiltheranewhome.

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2．阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。

NeverhadIthoughtIwouldendupplayingcomputergamesinmybedroomduringthesummerbreak

beforeuniversity.Infact,Istudiedhardinmysenioryearandgotadmittedintomydreamschoolwithafull

scholarship.Ishouldhavebeenthrowingpartiesorhangingoutwithmyfriends.Wherewasthissenseof

disorientation(迷失方向)from?

Imissedmyhighschoolyears.Myclassmateswereniceandmyteacherswerehelpful.Everythingwas

well-plannedandprepared.AllIhadtodowasfollowtherulesandhandinmyworkontime.WhileIalso

complainedabouttherigidlifelikemyfellowschoolmates,Iadaptedtoitquitewell.Three-yearhighschoollife

mouldedmeintoa“good”student.

Noweverythingwasdifferent.Withoutworkandpressurefrommyhighschoolteachers,Ihadnoideawhat

Iwassupposedtodowithallthisfreetimeuntilmybestfriendcalled.

“Youknowwhat,Dennis?SallyhasacquiredafullscholarshiptostudyataschoolabroadandAlexis

startinghisinternshipatatelevisionstation.”Leokeptmeupdatedofeveryone’sinterestingandmeaningfulnew

life.“AndI’mconsideringapplyingforapre-collegeexchangeprogram.Whathaveyoubeenupto,Dennis?”

Unwillingtotellhimthefact,mytonguetwistedandmyfaceflushedwithembarrassment,“Well,nothingworth

sharing.”ButIfeltastrongurgetoask,“Howdoyoumanagetoarrangeyourlifesowell?”

“Well,”answeredLeo,“Ijustwanttomakeeachdayamasterpiece.”Hearinghiswords,Icouldn’thelpbut

reflectonthedaysthatIhadalreadyletslideby.Sensingmydepression,Leooffered,“Icanforwardthe

informationaboutmyprogramtoyouifyouwant.Justletmeknowifyouwanttocheckitout.”“I’llthinkaboutit.

Thanks,bro.”

注意：(1)续写词数应为150左右;

(2)请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。

Paragraph1:

Hangingupthephone,Ibegantowonderwhata“masterpieceday”lookedliketome.

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Paragraph2:

Iappliedforthesamepre-collegeexchangeprogramasLeodid.

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3．阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。

AsIunzippedmylunchbox,thewholeplacewasturnedintoaspicycurry(咖喱)dream.Iimmediatelyhid

itundermyseat,hopingnoonewouldtakenotice.

Momhadreallyoutdoneherselfwithmasala—ourfamily’sall-timefavoritedishbackinIndia.Buttoday,it

wasn’tjustaboutmeandmylunch.Awarmsmileonhisface,Rickyinvitedme,anewtransferstudentfromIndia

toNewYorkcity,forlunch.

“Ava,comesithere!”Rickycalledout,gesturingtowardsavacantseat.

AsImademywayover,memoriesofthoseawkwardlunchtimeswhenIstudiedinKansas,oneofthemost

conservativestates,floodedback.Icouldstillrecallhoweveryonewouldwrinkletheirnosesandstarecuriously

whenIunpackedmyIndianfood.Italwaysmademefeellikeanoutsider,likeIdidn’tbelong.

Therefore,beforemyfirstdayinthisschool,Ihaddemandedmymompack“normal”western-stylefoodfor

me.Istillrememberedthelookonherfaceuponhearingit,asshesignedindisappointmentandconfusion,“Isn’t

thereamomentwhenyoufeelproudofyourorigin?”Thatwashurting,butnotmorehurtingthanothers’giggles

andwhispers.Honestly,longqueueswerecommoninIndianrestaurantsinNewYorkcity,aculturalmeltingpot,

butIwouldn’ttakethatrisk.

Unfortunately,thismorning,Momhadforgottentomakesandwichorany“normal”food,soIhadtobring

leftoversfromourdinner.Atthethoughtofthepossibleoh-no-second(社死),Ifeltlikebeingthrowninto

darkness.

However,beforeIcamebacktoreality,Rickynoticedmysneaking(躲躲藏藏).“Whatdoyouhavefor

lunch?”heasked,hiseyestwinklingwithinterest.Itriedtobrushitoff(搪塞),claimingIwasn’thungry.But

Rickywouldn’tletitgo,andbeforeIcouldprotest,hehadthelidofmylunchboxopenandIpreparedmyselffor

suchfamiliarresponsesas“Ew”or“Whatisthat?”

注意：1.续写词数应为150左右;

2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。

However,IdidnotgetwhatIwasexpecting.

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Afterschool,IfoundMompreparingsandwichfortomorrow’slunch.

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4．阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。

Itseemedtotakeforever,butIfinallyturnedthirteenlastSaturday.Idecidedtohangaroundmyroomand

junkabunchofkidstuff.AsIsortedoutthedrawers,aphotofelltothefloor.Thefacestaringupatmewasmy

friend,Jane.

JaneFarmerwasthesmartestgirlI’deverknown.ShealmostalwaysgotstraightA’s,andshewaspretty,too.

Partofmewantedtohateher,butIcouldn’t.Shewastoonice,instead.Ienviedherandlongedwithallmyheartto

bejustlikeher.

Janewasatopstudentandalwayssatinfrontoftheclass.Mydeskwasintheback.I’dwatchMrsSchnell,

ourteacher,pacebackandforthinfrontofus.Sheasshortwiththickredhairandasmilesheturnedonandoff

likeawatertap.

Ialwaysslumped(弯垂)waydowninmydesk,desperatelyhopingtohidemyself.Iwasterrifiedthatthe

nextnameIheardwouldbemyown.SometimesmyheartpoundedsoloudlythatIwassureherearswouldfind

meevenifhersharpeyesdidn’t.

Eachtimeshecalledoutaname,thevictimwouldhavetorise,standstraightasabroomstick,shoulders

squared,andreadtotheentireclass.Morethananything,Ihatedtostandandreadaloudtotheclass.Unlikeme,

Janerarelymadeamistake.Andifshedid,shewasnevermadetofeelashamed.Mrs.Schnellwouldflasha

pleasantsmileandpatientlyguidehertowardthecorrectanswer.Iwasn’tgoodatreadingandcouldtellthatMrs.

Schnellwasoftennotatallpleasedwithme.

Onedayaftersoccerpractice,JaneandIwerestandingtogetherwaitingforourmothers.Weweren’tfriends

yet.Iwantedtoaskherifshelikedmovies,butIchangedmymindwhenIlookedatherface.Sheseemedtofeel

myeyes“Whatareyoulookingat?”Sheasked.“You,”Isaid.“Why?”sheasked.“Becauseyouseemedsosad,”I

said.

Para1:

“IgotB+onthehistorytest,”Shesaid,soundinglikeshecouldn’tacceptit.

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Para2:

Shelookedatmeforamoment,maybedecidingifshecouldtrustme.

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参考答案

1．

AsSarahdidremovetheblindfold,herhandswenttohermouthinshock.Shecouldn’tbelieveherchildren

hadbroughthertothesameplacewhereherhousehadbeenengulfedinflamesmonthsago.Butnow,anew,

beautifulhomestoodbeforethem.Foramoment,Sarahfeltlikehermindwasplayingtricksonher.Sheeven

pinchedherselftocheckifitwasallreal,andITWAS!Rightthen,Sarahsawherneighborspouringoutoftheir

houses,rushingtowardherandherchildren,allsinging“HappyBirthday”toher.Sarahburstintotearsasshe

understoodeverything.

Herneighborshadactuallybuiltheranewhome.TheytookSarah’soldhouse’sdesignasabasisandrebuilt

itwithsafetyinstallationsdone.Whenthehousewasfinallycomplete,theycouldn’tcontactherbecauseshe

wouldn’tanswertheircalls.Sotheydecidedtosurpriseherbyropingherchildrenintotheirbirthdaypartyplan!

“Ohgod…”Sarahsobbed.“How…HowamIsupposedtothankyouall?Iwillpayyouback.Iassureyou!”A

coupleofdayslater,Sarahmovedintothehousewithherkidsandtheentireneighborhoodbecamelikeabig,

lovingfamilywhosharedtheirjoysandsorrows.

【写作分析】本篇书面表达是读后续写。本文以人物为线索展开。莎拉独自抚养孩子，承受着难以言说的

痛苦。意识到必须改变现状，她向经理请假一天。那天，她本想享受悠闲时光，结果厨房意外失火，房屋

被毁。邻居虽表同情并提供帮助，但莎拉担心连累他们，带着孩子们住进了收容所。数月后，在莎拉生日

这天，孩子们为她准备了惊喜，蒙上她的眼睛带她外出，踏上了一场神秘而温馨的庆祝之旅。

【要点解析】1.段落续写

①由第一段句首内容“当萨拉摘下眼罩时，她的手震惊地伸到嘴边。”可知，第一段可以描写具体让萨拉震惊

的事情和动作。

②由第二段句首内容“她的邻居实际上给她建了一个新家。”可知，第二段可以描写得知真相后，萨拉的语言

和感受。

2.续写线索：摘下眼罩—看到新家—得知真相—感谢—感悟

3.词汇激活

行为类

①吞没：engulf/swallow

②捉弄：playtrickson/makefunof

③冲，迅速移动：rush/dash

情绪类

①（使）吃惊，（使）感到意外：surprise/amaze

②快乐：joy/happiness

【高分句型1】Shecouldn’tbelieveherchildrenhadbroughthertothesameplacewhereherhousehadbeen

engulfedinflamesmonthsago.(运用了省略引导词that的宾语从句、where引导的定语从句)

【高分句型2】Sheevenpinchedherselftocheckifitwasallreal,andITWAS!(运用了if引导的宾语从句、不

定式tocheck作目的状语)

2．Onepossibleversion

Paragraph1:

Hangingupthephone,Ibegantowonderwhata“masterpieceday”lookedliketome.Ideasbegantopopintomy

mindasIdeterminedthatIwastomakeachange.Perhapsthissummerwasnotaboutgettinglostinthevirtual

worldorwaitingforsomeonetoassignmetasks.Idecidedthatforme,adaythatwastrulya“masterpiece”should

betimespentpushingmyselfoutofthecomfortzoneandsettingthestageforfurthereducation.Ipickedupmy

phoneanddialedLeo’snumber(动作描写),“Wouldyoupleaseforwardmethatemail?There’snothingtoloseto

giveitatry.”(语言描写)Paragraph2:

Iappliedforthesamepre-collegeexchangeprogramasLeodid.Aftercheckingtherequirementsofthe

exchangeprogram,Imadeitagoaltosecureaspotinit.Overthenexttwoweeks,Idedicatedhourstorevisingmy

applications,collectinglettersofrecommendationfrommyteachers,andpracticinginterviewswithLeo.(动作描

写)Sparingnoeffort,Iwasfinallyadmittedtotheprogram.Happytoseethechangeinmyself(心理描写),Ifelt

mylifewasbackontrackbymakingachangeofmyselfandmakingeachdayamasterpiece.

【写作分析】本文以人物为线索展开，讲述了作者在大学前的暑假里感到迷茫；没有了学习压力，作者不

知道该怎么打发这些空闲时间，直到最好的朋友打来电话，让作者重新振作起来。

【要点解析】①由第一段首句内容“挂了电话，我开始想“杰作日”对我来说是什么样子的。”可知，第一段

可描写作者下定决心作出改变以及为改变做准备。

②由第二段首句内容“我申请了和利奥一样的大学预科交流项目。”可知，第二段描写的是作者申请大学预科

项目以及被录取。

2.续写线索：思考“杰作日”——决定做出改变——打电话给里奥——申请大学预科交流项目——为申请预科

项目面试做准备——被大学预科项目录取

3.词汇激活

行为类

①想知道：wonder/wanttoknow/becuriousabout

②决定：determine/decide/resolve

③致力于：delicateto/devoteto

情绪类

高兴的：happy/delighted/pleased

[高分句型1].IdeasbegantopopintomymindasIdeterminedthatIwastomakeachange.（运用了as引导的时

间状语从句，that引导的宾语从句）

[高分句型2]Sparingnoeffort,Iwasfinallyadmittedtotheprogram.（运用了现在分词作状语）

3．However,IdidnotgetwhatIwasexpecting.Rickytookadeepbreath,closedhiseyes,andsavoredthearomaof

themasala.Insteadoftheusualstaresandwhispers,therewasonlyinterestonRicky’sface.Hisfacelitupwitha

broadsmile,asking,“Youmummademasalaforyourlunch?”BeforeIcouldmakearesponse,headded:“Icould

bedyingofenvy!Youknowwhat,lastSunday,myparentsandIqueuedupforthreehoursinharshcoldinfifth

AvenueforthenewIndiarestaurant.”Heenjoyedeverybite,noddinghisheadinapproval.Itwasawelcome

changefromthestaresandwhispersIhadgrownaccustomedto.

Afterschool,IfoundMompreparingsandwichfortomorrow’slunch.IcameoverandaskedifIcouldhave

palakpaneerinmylunchbox,whichmadeherabitconfused.Finally,ItoldheraboutmyexperiencewithRicky

andhowhehadenjoyedmyfood.Mom’sfacelitupwithjoy.“I’mgladhelikedit,”shesaid.“AndI’m