TheTruthAboutLying关于说谎的真相朱迪斯

1、The Truth About Lying 关于说谎的真相 朱迪斯维奥斯特1. I've been wanting to write on a subject that intrigues and challenges methe subject of lying. I've found it very difficult to do. Everyone I've talked to has a quite intense and personal but often rather intolerant point of view about what we can a

2、nd can never never tell lies about. I've finally reached the conclusion that I can't present any ultimate conclusions, for too many people would promptly disagree. Instead, I'd like to present a series of moral puzzles, all concerned with lying. I'll tell you what I think about them.

3、 Do you agree?我一直想写一个令我深感兴趣的话题： 关于说谎的问题。我觉得这个题目很难写。 所有我交谈过的人都对什么事情可以说谎 什么事情绝对不可以说谎 持有强烈的、常常不容别人分说的个人意见。最后我得出结论 , 我不能下任何定 论, 因为这样做就会有太多的人立即反对。我想我还是提出若干都与说谎有关的 道义上的难题吧。我将向读者阐明我对这些难题的个人看法。你们觉得对吗 ?Social Lies 社交性谎言2. Most of the people I've talked with say that they find social lying acceptable and

4、necessary. They think it's the civilized way for folks to behave. Without these little white lies, they say, our relationships would be short and nasty. It's arrogant, they say, to insist on being so incorruptible and so brave that you cause other people unnecessary embarrassment or pain by

5、compulsively presenting them with your honesty. I basically agree. What about you?和我交谈过的大多数人都说，他们认为旨在促进社会交际的谎言是可以接受的 也是必要的。 他们认为这是一种文明的行为。 他们说，要不是这类无关紧要的 谎言，人与人之间的关系就会变得粗野不快 , 无法持久。他们说,如果你要做到十 二分正直、十二分无畏，不由自主地用你的诚实使他人陷入不必要的窘境或痛苦 之中, 这只能说你是傲慢自大。对此 ,我基本赞同。你呢 ?3. Will you say to people, when it simply

6、isn't true, "I like your new hairdo," "You're looking much better,""It's so nice to see you," "I hada wonderful time"?你会不会跟人说 : “我喜欢你的新发型 , ”“你气色好多了 , ”“见到你真高 兴, ”“我玩得很尽兴 , ”而实际上根本不是这么回事儿。4. Will you praise ugly presents and ugly kids?你会不会对令人憎厌的礼物，

7、或相貌平平的孩子称赞有加。5. Will you decline invitations with"We 're busy that night so sorry we can' t come, ”when the truth is you 'd rather stay home than dine with the So-dad-sos ？你婉辞邀请时会不会说“那天晚上我们正好没空 真对不起，我们不能来 , 而实际上你是宁肯呆在家里也不想跟某某夫妇一起进餐。6. And even though, as I do, you may prefer the pol

8、ite evasion of "Youreally cooked up a storm" instead of "The soup" which tastes like warmed-over coffee "is wonderful," will you, if you must, proclaim it wonderful?虽然像我那样，你也想用 “太丰盛了”这种委婉的托辞，而不是盛赞“那汤味 道好极了” （ 其实味同重新热过的咖啡 ）, 但如果你必须赞美那汤，你会说它鲜美 吗?7. There's one manI kn

9、ow who absolutely refuses to tell sociallies. "Ican't play that game," he says, "I'm simply not made that way." And his answer to the argument that saying nice things to someone doesn't cost anything is, "Yes, it does it destroys your credibility."My friend

10、doesnot indulge in what he calls "flattery, false praise and sweet comments". When others tell lies he will not go along. He says that social lying is lying, that little white lies are still lies. And he feels that telling lies is morally wrong. What about you?我认识一个人 , 他完全拒绝说这类社交性谎言。“我不会那一

11、套 , ”他说, “我生 来就不会那一套。”讲到对人家说几句好听的话并不失去什么， 他的回答是 , “不 对，当然有损失 那会损害你的诚信度。”因此你不问他，他不会对你刚买 来的画发表意见， 但除非你想听老实话。 否则你也不会去问他的真实想法。 当我 们这些说谎者轻声称赞着“多美啊”的时候，他的沉默往往是极能说明问题的。 我的这位朋友从来不讲他所说的“奉承话、 虚假的赞美话和动听话”。 别人说些 无伤大雅的谎言， 他则不。 他说社交性谎言还是谎言， 无关紧要的小小谎言还是 谎言。他认为说谎不合道德。你呢？Peace-Keeping Lies 息事宁人的谎言8. Manypeople tell

12、peace-keeping lies; lies designed to avoid irritation or argument; lies designed to shelter the liar from possible blame or pain; lies designed to keep trouble at bay without hurting anyone.不少人为了息事宁人而说谎：那种意在避免生气或争吵的谎言， 意在使说谎者免受可能的责备或烦恼的谎言：意在（ 或据认为理应 ） 不伤害他人而又能帮助避免麻烦的谎言。9. I tell these lies at times,

13、 yet I always feel they're wrong. I understand why we tell them, but still they feel wrong. And whenever I lie so that someone won't disapprove of me or think less of me or yell at me, I feel I'm a bit of a coward, I feel I'm dodging responsibility, I feel guilty. What about you?我有时也

14、说这种谎， 不过我总觉得不该说。 我知道为什么要说这种谎， 但说这种 谎终究不对。 每当我为了不让别人讨厌自己、 看轻自己、或冲着自己嚷嚷而说谎 时，我总觉得自己有点像个懦夫，觉得自己是在逃避责任，觉得 , 愧疚。你呢？10. Do you, whenyou are late for a date because you overslept, say you're late because you got caught in a traffic jam?你由于睡过 . 赴约会迟到了，会不会说是因为碰上堵车才晚到的？11. Do you,when you ' re forget

15、to call a friend,say that you called several times but the line was busy?你忘了给朋友打电话，会不会谎称打过好几次，可电话老占线？12. Do you, when you didn't remember that it was your father's birthday, say that his present must be delayed in the mail?你忘了父亲的生日，会不会说寄给他的礼物准是给耽搁了？13 . And when you're planning a weekend

16、 in New York City and you're not in the mood to visit your mother, who lives there, do you conceal with a lie, if you must the fact that you'll be in New York? Or do you havethe courage or is it thecruelty? to say, "I'll be in New York, butsorry I don't plan on seeing you"?

17、你打算去纽约市度周末， 但又不想去看望住在那里的母亲， 你会必要的话用 谎言隐瞒你将到纽约的事实， 还是会勇敢地或者说狠心地说： “我 要来纽约 可是抱歉，我不打算来看望你”？14. (Dave and his wife Elaine have two quite different points of view on this very subject. He calls her a coward. She says she's being wise. He says she must assert her right to visit NewYork sometimes and n

18、ot see her mother. To which she always patiently replies: "Why should we have useless fights? My mother's too old to change. We get along much better when I lie to her.")( 戴夫和妻子伊莱恩正是在这个问题上有两种颇不相同的观点。他称她为懦夫。 她说自己处理这事是明智的。 他说她应该维护自己有的时候去纽约但不去看望母 亲的权利。 对此她总是耐心地回答说： “我们何必无谓地争吵呢？我母亲年纪大 了，不会

19、改了。我对她说个谎，我们相处得就更好。” )15. Finally, do you keep the peace by telling your husband lies on the subject of money? Do you reduce what you really paid for your shoes? And in general do you find yourself ready, willing and able to lie to him when you make absurd mistakes or lose or break things?最后一点， 你会不会

20、在钱的问题上对丈夫说谎， 以求太平？你会不会少报买鞋子 的钱？你出了什么荒唐的错误或丢失了物品打碎了器皿时是不是常常想对他撒 谎，而且会对他撒谎？16. "I used to have a romantic idea that part of intimacy was confessing every dumbthing that you did to your husband. But after a couple of years of that," says Laura, "have I changed my mind!"“过去我往往不切实际地以为

21、亲密关系的一个组成部分就是把自己做的每件蠢 事都如实告诉丈夫。可这么过了几年之后，”劳拉说，“我就改了主意 ! ”17. And having changed her mind, she finds herself telling peacekeeping lies. And yes, I tell them too. What about you?改主意后，她在不知不觉中说谎话求太平了。没错，我也说这种谎。你呢？保护性谎言 Protective Lies18. Protective lies are lies folks tell often quite serious lies becau

22、se they're convinced that the truth would be too damaging. They lie because they feel there are certain humanvalues that are more important than the wrong of having lied. They lie, not for personal gain, but because they believe it's for the good of the person they're lying to. They lie

23、to those they love, to those whotrust them most of all, on the grounds that breaking this trust is justified.保护性谎言就是因为人们认为事实真相危害性太大而说的谎言， 这类谎言通常事 关重大。他们说谎，因为他们认为， 人的某些价值观念压倒了说谎这一错误行为 本身。他们说谎不是为个人私利， 而是因为他们相信， 那是为他们对之说谎的人 好。他们对自己所爱的人撒谎， 对最信任自己的人撒谎， 就是因为他们认为这样 做是有正当理由的。19 . They may lie to their child

24、ren on money or marital matters.他们会在金钱或婚姻问题上对子女说谎。20. They may lie to the dying about the state of their health.他们会对垂死者隐瞒真实病情。21. They may lie to their closest friend because the truth about her talents or son or psyche would be or so they insist utterlydevastating.他们会对密友说谎， 因为关于其才能、 其爱子或其精神状态的实话会不妨

25、说 他们坚持这么认为使其身心受到极大伤害。22.I sometimes tell such lies, but I'm aware that it's quite presumptuous to claim I know what's best for others to know. That's called playing God. That's called man ipulati on and con trol. And we n ever can be sure, once we start to juggle lies, just where

26、 they'll la nd, exactly where they'll roll.有时我也说这种谎，可我明白，声称自己懂得什么事他人应该知道， 这未免太自 以为是了。这无异于充当上帝。这无异于操纵和控制他人。而我们一旦开始玩起 谎言戏法 就再也无法知道谎言何时会收场，究竟会滑向何方。23. A nd furthermore,we mayfi nd ourselves lyi ng in order to back up thelies that are backing up the lie we initially told.而且，我们会不知不觉地为了圆先前说的谎言而说谎。

27、24 .And furthermore let's be honest if conditions were reversed, wecerta inly would n't want anyone lying to us.而且一一我们不妨直说一一如果情形倒过来，我们当然不愿意别人对自己说谎。25 .Yet, having said all that, I still believe that there are times when protective lies must non etheless be told. What about you?不过，话虽如此，我还是觉得有

28、时保护性谎言还非说不可。你呢?Trust-Keepi ng Lies 信守承诺的谎言26 .Another group of lies are trust-keeping lies, lies that involvetriangulation,with A (that's you) telling lies to B on behalf of C (whosetrust you'd promised to keep). Most people con cede that once you've agreed not to betray a frie nd'sc

29、on fide nee, you can't betray it, eve n if you mustlie. But rve talked with people who don't want you to tell them anything that they might be called on to lie about. They absolutely don't want to know about it.另一类谎言是信守承诺的谎言，涉及三方的谎言，即 A （你）为了 C （你答应为其 信守承诺者）而对B说谎。大多数人承认，一旦你答应不背叛朋友的信任，你就

30、不能背叛，哪怕你必须说谎。但我与之交谈过的人中也有人不想听那些他们也许 得为之说谎的事。27. "I don't tell lies for myself," says Fran, "and I don't want to have to tell them for other people." Which means, she agrees, that if her best friend is hav ing an affair, she absolutely does n't want to know about it.“我

31、不为自己说谎，”弗兰说，“我也不愿为别人说谎。”她承认，这就意味着 如果她最好的朋友有风流韵事的话，她绝对不想知道。28. "Are you say in g," her best frie nd asks, "that you'd betray me?"“你是说，”她最好的朋友问，“你会出卖我?29. Fran is very pained but very adama nt. "I would n't want to betray you, so,do n't tell me anything about it.&q

32、uot;弗兰心里很为难，但态度十分坚决。“我不想出卖你，所以，别跟我说这事。”30. Fran's best frie nd is shocked. What about you?弗兰最好的朋友深感震惊。你呢？31. Do you believe you can have close frie nds if you're not prepared to receive their deepest secrets?你是不是认为，如果你不愿意了解朋友最深的隐密，你仍会有好朋友？32. Do you believe you must always lie for your frie

33、nds?你是不是认为你必须一直为朋友说谎？33. Do you believe, if your frie nd tells a secret that turns out to bequite immoral or illegal, that once you've promised to keep it, you must keep it?你是不是认为，如果朋友透露的一个秘密是违反道德或法律的，而一旦你答应保密，你就得真的保密？34 .And what if your friend were your bossif you were perhaps oneof the Presid

34、e nt's men would you betray or lie for him over, say,Watergate?如果你的朋友正好是你的上司一一如果你恰好就是总统班底的人一一比如说 在水门事件这个问题上，你是背叛他还是为他说谎？35 .As you can see, these issues get terribly sticky.可以想见这些问题非常棘手。36. It's mybelief that once we've promised to keep a trust, we must tell lies to keep it. I also believe that we can't tell Watergate lies. And if these two stateme nts strike you as quite con tradictory, you're right they're quite con tradictory. But for now they're the best I can do.What about you?