豪斯医生《house》经典台词

豪斯医生经典台词（豪斯语录）DansMother:Howcanyoujustsitthere?mysonisgoingtodie你怎么能就这么坐在那边?我儿子就要死了House:IfIeatstandingup,Ispill.如果我站着吃东西,就会洒出来.Luke:Isthisagoodhospital?这家医院好吗?House:Dependsonwhatyoumeanbygood.Ilikethechairs.这得看你对好医院的定义了,我喜欢这里的椅子.Dr.Foreman:Isnttreatingpatientswhywebecamedoctors?医治病人难道不是我们成为医生的原因吗?House:No,treatingillnessesiswhywebecamedoctors.Treatingpatientsiswhatmakesmostdoctorsmiserable.不,医治疾病才是我们做医生的原因,医治病人则是医生痛苦的根源.Dr.Wilson:Ilovemywife.我爱我老婆House:Youcertainlylovesayingit.当然，你爱这样说。患者说他可以和上帝对话,然后house说他的问题应该在他的脑袋上.chase说,这只是宗教信仰house:youtalktoGod,yourereligious.Godtalkstoyou,yourepsychotic.你和上帝说话,你是信仰者,上帝和你说话,你是精神病House:ButIhaveatheory.Thereisonechemicalthat,ifingested,itcausesapersonsestrogenleveltoincreasedramatically.我有个理论,有一种药品被服用后会导致病人体内的雌激素水平大幅上升.Bill:Whatisit?那是什么?House:Itscalled.estrogen.雌激素一患者志向是成为黑人议员,House:YourenotgoingtobePresidenteitherway-theydontcallittheWhiteHousebecauseofthepaintjob你无论如何都成不了总统的,白宫之所以叫白宫可不是因为它是给漆成白色的.House:Peopledontwantasickdoctor.人们不喜欢生病的医生.Dr.Wilson:Thatsfairenough,Idontlikehealthypatients.那很公平,我也不喜欢健康的病人.Dr.Wilson:Youwilllie,cheatandstealtogetwhatyouwant,butyoureincapableofkissingalittleass?你为了得到你要的结果可以坑蒙拐骗,无所不用,怎么就不能稍稍拍拍马屁呢?House:Well,weallhaveourlimitations.恩，人总是有缺点的.House:No,thereisnotathinlinebetweenloveandhate.ThereisaGreatWallofChinawitharmedsentriespostedevery20betweenloveandhate.爱与恨并非只有一线之隔,爱与恨之间隔着一道十步一岗,五步一哨的中国长城.House:Liftupyourarms.Youhaveaparasite.抬起你的手臂,你体内有个寄生虫.Jill:Likeatapewormorsomething?你是说象绦虫一类的东西?House:Liebackandliftupyoursweater.Youcanputyourarmsdown.撩起你的毛衣,躺下,把手放下来Jill:Canyoudoanythingaboutit?你能除掉它吗?House:Onlyforaboutamonthorso.Afterthatitbecomesillegaltoremove,exceptinacoupleofstates.在大多数洲里,除掉超过一个月大的这种寄生虫是非法的.Jill:Illegal?非法的?House:Dontworry.Manywomenlearntoembracethisparasite.Theynameit,dressitupintinyclothes,arrangeplaydateswithotherparasites.别担心,很多女人都会喜欢她们的寄生虫,给它起名字,穿衣服,还让它和其他的寄生虫一起玩.Jill:PlaydatesHouse:(showinghersonogram)Ithasyoureyes.它的眼睛很象你(这位女士怀孕了)Dr.Wilson:Imstillamazedyoureinthesameroomasapatient.真令我惊讶,你居然还和患者呆在一间屋子里.House:Peopledontbothermeuntiltheygetteeth.没长牙的小家伙我倒不怕.House:Aslongasyouretryingtobegood,youcandowhateveryouwant.只要你尽力了,就表示你可以做任何你想做的事情Dr.Wilson:Andaslongasyourenottrying,youcansaywhateveryouwant.只要你不去尽力,你就可以说任何你想说的话.House:Sobetweenus,wecandowhateverwewant.Wecanruletheworld!那么说我们两个人加起来就做任何事,说任何话了，我们可以一起统治世界了.123456下一页House扮演者hugh获得金球奖时的发言： blahblah（客套话若干），我列出了172个感谢对象（场下略有笑声），咳，大伙准备好了吗（场下笑的人开始多了）。嗯，我把这些人写在不同的纸条上，放在了我的左边口袋里。我随机抽出三个，没选中的只能算了（场下大笑）。 （摇摇口袋，掏出纸条）我要感谢剧本总监blah blah，（把纸条扔掉，下面鼓掌，笑）。（第二张纸条）我要感谢发型设计师黛安娜（纸条扔掉）。（掏出第三张，看了看，嘀咕了一句：算了。扔掉，台下鼓掌哄笑）。（第四张纸条）我要感谢我的经纪人谁谁，然后叹了口气：这不是我的笔迹！（哈哈哈哈）然后，还是正经地感谢了几个人，耳熟的名字是X战警的导演B.S.，B.S.是House第一集的导演，还在第七集里客串过自己。House: So whats her name and when do I get to meet her? 她的名字叫什么,我什么时候能见到她?(盘问Wilson的约会对象) Dr. Wilson: Theres nobody! Give it up! 别瞎猜了,根本没这回事 House: Your lips say no, but your shoes say yes. 你嘴上说不,可你的鞋子泄露了真相(WILSON换了双漂亮的新鞋) Dr. Wilson: Theyre French. You cant trust a word they say. 它们是法国货,法国人的话一句都不能信. Dr. Foreman: Why are you riding on me? 你为什么对我这么刻薄? House: Its what I do. Has it gotten worse lately? 我就是这样子,最近我变得更厉害了吗? Dr. Foreman: Yeah. Seems to me. 对我来说是的. House: Really? Well, that rules out the race thing. You were just as black last week. 真的吗?那么肯定不是种族歧视的原因了,你还和上周一样的黑. Dr. Forman: Ten-year olds do not have heart attacks. Its got to be a mistake.10岁的孩子不会得心脏病,肯定有什么地方错了House: Right. The simplest explanation is shes a 40-year old lying about her age. Maybe an actress trying to hang on.没错,最简单的答案就是她谎报了年纪,她其实已经四十岁了.也许她是个女演员. Dr. Cameron: Ill check into it.我去查查这个Dr. Foreman: Ill make the call.我去打电话Dr. Chase: Ill keep the kid alive. For a while at least.我去保持那孩子活着.至少能维持一会儿.House: Ill have lunch.我去吃午饭Dr. Foreman: Oh, Cameron, I need you for a couple of hours.Cameron,你有空吗?Dr. Cameron: Whats up?什么事?Dr. Foreman: When you break into a house, its always better to have a white chick with you.闯空门的时候,有个白人女性陪着比较保险. House: What would you prefer - a doctor who holds your hand while you die or who ignores you while you get better?I guess it would particularly suck to have a doctor who ignores you while you die.哪种医生你比较喜欢-在你临死时会陪在你身边的医生或者是当你病情好转后不再搭理你的医生?我猜你最讨厌的是当你快死的时候不再搭理你的医生. House: Another reason I dont like meeting patients. If they dont know what you look like, they cant yell at you.我不喜欢见病人的另一个原因就是,如果他们不知道你的样子,他们就没法冲你大吼大叫. Dr. House: The most successful marriages are based on lies. Youre off to a great start.成功的婚姻都是谎言的基础上建立起来的,你已经开了个好头.Dr. Wilson: Im still amazed youre in the same room as a patient.真令我惊讶,你居然还和患者呆在一间屋子里.House: People dont bother me until they get teeth.没长牙的小家伙我倒不怕.House: What do you know about the nun?你对那个修女有什么看法?Dr. Chase: Which one?哪一个?House: The cute one. I think she likes me. The sick one, obviously.漂亮的那个,我想她喜欢上我了. 当然是生病的那个!House: It turns out your best judgment is not good enough. Heres an idea - next time, use mine事实证明你最有把握的诊断还是不够好,不如这样吧,下次试试我的主意. House: You told me you hadnt changed your diet or exercise. Were you lying?Samantha: Lying?House: Does your husband have high blood pressure?Samantha: My husband?House: Yeah, see, if youre going to repeat everything I say, this conversations going to take twice as long. Dr. Foreman: The kid was just taking his AP calculus exam when all of a sudden he got nauseous and disoriented.这个孩子在微积分考试当中突然感到恶心眩晕.House: Thats the way calculus presents.当然这是微积分的作用啦House: I assume minimal at best is your stiff upper lip British way of saying no chance in hell?我认为你说的有可能就是根本没指望了的英国表达方式.Dr. Chase: Im Australian.我是澳大利亚人House: You put the Queen on your money. Youre British.你们把女王的头像印在钱币上,你们就是英国人. 上一页 1 2 3 4 5 6 下一页一个女病人在看门诊，HOUSE在玩游戏机，那女的问，我还要等多久？HOUSE回答：比你2分钟前问的要少2分钟。 为什么house不穿白大褂？ House: See that? They all assume Im a patient because of this cane. Wilson: So put on a white coat like the rest of us. House: I dont want them to think Im a doctor. Wilson: You see where the administration might have a problem with that attitude. House: People dont want a sick doctor. Wilson: Fair enough. I dont like healthy patients house：看吧，就因为我这个拐棍 他们都觉得我是个病人。 wilson: 那你就去找件白褂子穿的和我们一样。 house:我不像让别人以为我是个医生 wilson:看吧，这个就是为什么管理层对你的态度有意见。 house:这儿不需要一个病了的医生。 wilson:- - 这儿也不需要像你这样健康的病人 Foreman: Shouldnt we be speaking to the patient before we start diagnosing? House: Is she a doctor? Foreman: No, but House: Everybody lies. Cameron: Dr. House doesnt like dealing with patients. Foreman: Isnt treating patients why we became doctors? House: No, treating illnesses is why we became doctors, treating patients is what makes most doctors miserable. Foreman: So youre trying to eliminate the humanity from the practice of medicine. House: If you dont talk to them they cant lie to us, and we cant lie to them. Humanity is overrated. foreman:我们难道不应该在诊断之前和病人交流一下吗？ house:难道她是医生？ foreman:不是。但是 house:没有人不说谎 cameron:豪斯医生不擅长和病人打交道 foreman:如果不和病人打交道，那我们怎么成为医生？ house:错了，我们成为医生的理由是治病，而治人使得大多数的医生悲惨万分。 foreman:所以你决定把人性从医生的使命中排除掉。 house:如果我们不同病人交流，他们就骗不了我们，当然我们也骗不了他们，人性在这里估价太高。没有必要 House: I always say if youre going to get shot, do it in a hospital. 我总是说如果你要挨枪子的话，最好的地方还得是在医院里。（近水楼台先得月） Moriarty: You think that the only truth that matters is the truth that can be measured. Good intentions dont count, whats in your heart doesnt count, caring doesnt count, that a mans life cant be measured by how many tears are shed when he dies. Its because you cant measure them. Its because you dont want to measure them. Doesnt mean its not real. And even if Im wrong, youre still miserable. Did you really think that your lifes purpose was to sacrifice yourself and get nothing in return? No. You believe there is no purpose to anything. Even the lives you save you dismiss. You turn the one decent thing in your life and you taint it, strip it of all meaning. Youre miserable for nothing. I dont know why youd want to live. MORIARTY：你认为唯一有价值的真实是那些可以被衡量的真实，所以善意并不算数，好心也不作数，关怀也不重要，一个人的价值并不能用他葬礼上洒落的泪水来衡量。其实这是因为你并不想去衡量这些东西，而不是因为他们并不重要。即使我错了，你依旧活的悲惨可怜。你真的认为生命的意义在于牺牲自己而一无所求？ 不，你是个不相信任何意义的虚无主义者。 就连你拯救的那些生命你也视若无物，你行善事却无善心，你活的悲惨是因为你一无所有，我不知道你为什么还能继续活下去。（HOUSE的自我批判可真是够毒的，果然是严于律人，更严律己啊！） House: Sevens marry sevens, nines marry nines, fours marry fours. Maybe theres some wiggle room if theres enough money or if somebody got pregnant. But youve got at least three points on your husband and your frock says he didnt do it for the money and your breasts say you havent had any kids. Judy: So you figure my marriage is a mathematical error. HOUSE： 龙配龙，凤配凤，乌龟配王八。如果某人有钱或是怀孕的话可能还有点灵活的 空间，可是你至少比你丈夫高3分，而你的外套说明你不缺钱，而你的胸脯又说明你还没 有生育过。 JUDY： 所以你认为我的婚姻是个概率学上的错误。 House: Heres how life works: you either get to ask for an apology or you get to shoot people. Not both HOUSE： 我的哲学是：你要么要求别人道歉，要么射他两枪，不能两样都要。（应该先 让人道歉再开枪而不是反之） 上一页 1 2 3 4 5 6 下一页Dr. Cameron: Shes a Katrina victim. House: Shes better than Crandall hes a Katrina victim victim CAMERON： 她是Katrina台风的受害者。 HOUSE： 她比CRANDALL好多了，他是Katrina台风受害者的受害者。 House: Ideas are not soda cans. Recycling sucks. Give me something new and shiny. HOUSE： 主意可不象可乐罐一样可以循环利用，给我点新鲜的。 Dr. Foreman: (about his father) Hes not proud of me, hes proud of Jesus. Everything I do right is Gods work, everything I do wrong is my own damn fault. FOREMAN： 他才不会为我感到骄傲，他是为耶酥而骄傲，我做对的每件事都是上帝的功 劳，我做错的每件事都TMD是我自己的错。 Dr. Cuddy: (to House) I cant even imagine the backward logic you used to rationalize shooting a corpse. House: Well if I shot a live person theres a lot more paperwork. CUDDY： 我都无法想象你怎么跟我“合理”的解释射击一具尸体这件事。 HOUSE： 恩，如果我开枪射个活人的话会有更多的文件要处理。 (doing introductions) House: Wilson! This is Dry Cleaner Guy. Tax Accountant. Guy from the bus stop. This is Wilson. Dry Cleaner: How come he gets a name? House: Seniority. HOUSE：（HOUSE家的打牌聚会）WILSON，这位是干洗店员，这个是税务会计，公车司机 ，这位是WILSON 干洗店员： 怎么就这家伙有名字？ HOUSE：他比你们的资格老。 Dr. Chase: Youre going to talk to a patient? House: God talks to him. Itd be arrogant of me to assume Im better than God. CHASE：你打算和这个病人谈话？（这可真不象HOUSE啊） HOUSE：连上帝都和他谈话，我还没有傲慢到认为自己比上帝还强的地步。（也差不了多少了） House: God ever talk to you when you were in the seminary? Dr. Chase: Ummm. no. House: Gods loss, our gain. HOUSE：在神学院的时候上帝和你交谈过吗？ CHASE：没有 HOUSE：那可是上帝的损失啊，倒是便宜我们了。 Dr. Chase: I vote for neurofibromitosis. House: Why? Dr. Chase: Because the other choices suck worse. CHASE：我认为病人得的是neurofibromitosis（别问我这是啥东东） HOUSE：为什么？ CHASE：因为其他的选项要糟糕的多。 (House stops Foreman from writing on the whiteboard) House: Sorry, theres a reason they call it the whiteboard. Its not my rule. HOUSE：（阻止FOREMAN往白板上写字） 对不起，人们叫这个做“白”板是有原因的。 上一页 1 2 3 4 5 6 下一页Ronald: I assume House is a great doctor? Dr. Chase: Why would you assume that? Ronald: Because if youre that big a jerk youre either great or unemployed. RONALD：我猜HOUSE是个名医。 CHASE：为什么你会这么想？ RONALD：因为象他那么混的人如果不是特别有本事的话肯定找不到饭碗的。（有道理， 各位找不到工作的人得看看究竟自己是没本事呢还是个性有问题了。） House: (discussing Alexs breasts) Two clinic hours says that those love apples are handcrafted by God. Dr. Foreman: I thought you didnt believe in God. House: I do now. HOUSE：这两个小时的诊断我确定了一件事，她的乳房是上帝的杰作。 FOREMAN：我以为你不信上帝的。 HOUSE：现在我信了。 Dr. Foreman: House! You cant do this! House: Oh, if I had a nickel for every time Ive heard that. FOREMAN：HOUSE，你不能这么做。 HOUSE：噢，如果每次我听到这话能得到一角钱的话，我早成百万富翁了。 Stella: Whats wrong with your foot? House: War wound. Stella: Does it hurt? House: Every day. Stella: Is that why youre so sad? House: Oh arent you adorable. Im not sad, Im complicated - chicks dig that. One day youll understand. STELLA：你的脚怎么了？ HOUSE：战争受的伤。 STELLA：它疼吗？ HOUSE：每天都疼 STELLA：所以你看起来才这么忧伤吗？ HOUSE：你真可爱，这不叫忧伤，这叫做深沉，女孩子就喜欢深沉的男人，等你长大了就 明白了。 Dr. Chase:Weve got an MRI scheduled in twenty minutes. Earliest Foreman could get the machine House: I teach you to lie and cheat and steal, and as soon as my back is turned you wait in line? CHASE：我们的MRI排在二十分钟以后，这已经是FOREMAN的最大努力了。 HOUSE；我教了你们那么多的坑蒙拐